♛ Threadbare Blanket 48/50

    Title-9pts | Creativity-9pts | Grammer-10pts | Use of prompts-10pts | Overall Enjoyment-10pts

This story broke my heart too. I love you. What more can I say? Your writing style is beautiful, there's no other way to describe it. Your flow is great and choice of words is the best I've read here on AFF. I'm definitely obsessed. Yes, the story was a cliche tragic love car crash story, but the execution was beyond anything I've felt while reading these entries. You set the story up really well, keeping in mind the prompt of time and going through the months and seasons. At first I was confused about the reason why, but that became understood later through the story. I'll be honest, halfway through the story I was like...alright, Chanyeol and Baekhyun love each other and they're fluffy and cute, now what? Then that happened. The accident caught me off guard and I literally dropped my jaw to the gates of hell. I'm completely obsessed. You tie up the beginning with the ending so well, I was amazed. Your talent for writing is incredible. This story built up, built up, built up, and then BAM knocked me down. Beautifully painful. 

♛ Dance with me 48/50

    Title-9pts | Creativity-9pts | Grammer-10pts | Use of prompts-10pts | Overall Enjoyment-10pts

This story broke my heart. I mean, I knew it was coming. The prompt was depressing to begin with, and it was all a set up, but it still broke my heart. The execution of your story was fantastic. You did a wonderful job. Your writing style matched the prompt and story very well. Your choice was words were fine and elegant, matching the dancing Bomi of the story. Although this piece was very much shorter compared to the other pieces entered, I enjoyed the quality of the story. When Bomi realized she'd fallen from her wheelchair and coudln't dance anymore, I was heartbroken. I didn't expect that, I'm going to be honest, but it was painfully wonderful. I'm quite a masochistic reader I'll be honest. A beautiful tragedy, what could get better? My only critique is a wish to know what happened to her, how she lost her legs. Maybe even just a hint in the story would have eased my reader's mind. I enjoyed it nevertheless. 

✸ Before Daybreak 47/50

    Title-10pts | Creativity-10pts | Grammer-10pts | Use of prompts-9pts | Overall Enjoyment-8pts

A flower spirit...I would give you more points in creativity honestly. You were able to describe an alternate world so clearly that I could visually see Kris and Luhan sitting together in a field of flowers bickering and kissing and being adorable. Truly, time felt endless in this created world. Throughout the story, it felt like they could have been sitting there for just a couple of hours, or a couple of days. Whichever the case, both the boys' personas were distinct and well developed. You did an extremely good job at this. The darkening realization that Kris would have to be dead to be able to be living in Luhan's non-human world hit me like a rocket, but made sense and I saw it coming. Still so beautifullly written, beautifully done. Kris is the most adorable thing ever. I felt like it was a dream, the whole thing, like it was a memory etched in my own brain. That's how well you brought the story to life, and through mostly dialogue too. Amazing job, per usual. 

✸ A Sun Sets on December 46/50

    Title-10pts | Creativity-10pts | Grammer-10pts | Use of prompts-9pts | Overall Enjoyment-7pts

Quality over quantity definitely rang true with your story here. Although this story was very very short (and sweet), it hit all the right spots. A moment of reminiscenting memories. Your writing is beautiful and simple, but so understanding. The style of your story almost felt like a poem, you could probably turn it into a poem and it would be delightful. I especially love the title "A Sun Sets on December", very creative and visual, I could just see Youngbae, Daesung, and the children throughout the months and seasons, from summer to December. Although it is a little bit tragic that Daesung is no longer with Youngbae, because of the memories, the way Youngbae still imagines/remembers Daesung there, it almost feels as if he's still there too, and makes it less tragic. I loved that very much. Overall, this was a quick, easy, and beautiful light read. 

♥ Cold Lips 40/50

    Title-10pts | Creativity-8pts | Grammer-9pts | Use of prompts-7pts | Overall Enjoyment-6pts

I've got to say, I'm a er for gangs and action. Angsty drama is the love of my life. I think you did a really good job on the action parts of the story. I love how there are no heroes or villians, only a group of boys who are all so complicated in their own ways. I feel like this entire story could be laid out into a longer story, with multiple chapters because there was so much that happened. I feel like there are a lot of loose ends that could be tied up more effectively, like Daehyun's girlfriend who was killed by Jongup. I want to know more about Jongup, maybe a background story, maybe a little more character development on all the characters. I feel like your storyline is too complex to be condensed down to 5k words. This could be a full fledged beautiful angsty long story if you decided to, and I think it would have more impact than in a short story. I didn't see Youngjae coming, and I didn't think he would be a very important part of the story, but turns out he was. The kiss scene with him and Jongup was so adorable, jesus christ. I wish there was more of that. More development. Overall, really good and complex storyline, maybe too much for a short story. If your whole oneshot story was just the part where Jongup and Youngjae kissed, the cold and warm lips thing, with a little more incorporation of the prompts, it would have been enough. 

♥ Fading Time 39/50

    Title-8pts | Creativity-8pts | Grammer-8pts | Use of prompts-9pts | Overall Enjoyment-6pts

I think this story was a nice short cut of a longer, broader storyline. Like a small snippet of a more detailed plotline that could be worked into a multichaptered story. I did enjoy the story for the most part, I think the characters were adorable and very likeable, but there wasn't much background on them, so it was hard to really "feel" them or understand them. I think I would have felt more for Yejun and Kan's relationship if I had known more about them personally. A little back story or memory flash would have helped with that. The storyline itself was interesting, I wanted to know more about how Kan lost Seunghyun when they went back to the past. There were sparks of interesting plots that turned up into loose ends, but it was probably because the piece was too short to fit everything in anyway. Overall, I enjoyed the story, though I think it could be worked on and has the potential to work into a longer and more detailed story. 

♥ Token of Time 38/50

    Title-10pts | Creativity-8pts | Grammer-7pts | Use of prompts-8pts | Overall Enjoyment-5pts

First of all, I think you have some really interesting ideas. There's a lot that can be developed. Your plotline is interesting and mysterious in a way, that I wish there was more. I also think perhaps there's too much that I wouldn't be able to understand in the span of 5k words, and a longer story would be better suited for the plotline, just because there's so much to know. There's a lot of loose ends that are not settled. We don't really know what happened to Chanyeol or Kai, or even Suzy really. I think if you really develop each character and each plot or idea in this story, it would turn into a really good, multi-chaptered story which would suit it's nature more so than a short oneshot. Definitely lots more development would be helpful. I think you have a good idea, but expanding it would be of benefit for you. 

♥ A Letter to Oh Sehun 35/50

    Title-7pts | Creativity-7pts | Grammer-10pts | Use of prompts-7pts | Overall Enjoyment-4pts

I've got to say, I'm not a big fan of long letters as complete stories. I feel like a letter is too physical, it doesn't capture the emotions and feelings that a story would. I think especially with the events that happen in this story, it would be beneficial to not be in letter form. That way, you could describe what happens in vivid detail, and really "show" the reader what happened, instead of "telling". Showing is hard to do in letter form. But despite the odds, I think you did a pretty good job. There's a lot that happens that is explaine din the letter, again I wish I could have "seen" Hyejeong go through the events she went through, rather than reading her explain them to Sehun. That way I could empathize with her more, if that makes any sense. For example, if I had seen Hyejeong go through abortion and sterilization, if I could see her crying physically crying on her bedroom floor at 3am on a Wednesday night, I would be able to feel her emotions and empathize with her more than just knowing what she went through by her telling me. Overall, I think you have some really good story ideas. I'm a er for dark angsty stories, and I think this one could be laid out into a multi-chaptered story, which would give you room to develop the characters and settings and whatnot. Overall, a very interesting twist on love letters.