Last week, I was confronted with yet another issue. I swear as many times as I've pep talked people, I should be getting an award. So, on instagram, I'm in two groups chats with some close friends that I like to talk to. One group consists of mainly twice fans (which I don't understand why I'm in since I don't like twice like that. Funny story, I was added by this girl named Tasha who shares my surname and kept posting this copypasta on everything.). The other consists of SNSD fans. 

Anyway, I'd sent a screenshot to the twice group of something funny that happened in the SNSD chat and one of the girl's recognized that her ex was in the SNSD chat. I mean, she denied it, but I'm not dense, so I knew and I pried. (using fake names) Let's just say Lynette is the girl in the Twice chat and Camila is the other girl in the SNSD chat.

I found out from Camila that Lynette had (somehow) cheated on her with several different people? Also, she was very inappropriate and vulgar with Camila..

I confronted Lynette about the — excuse my french — ed up she did to Camila and offered advice on how to fix that. Being the childish person Lynette is, she ranted until she deactivated. Now, I'm friends with both, but now I'm stuck between to friends consistantly talking eachother and it's really tiring lmao.

I won't get into other people's b.s. anymore after that.

Another thing I've realized. As I'm getting older, I'm learning how people and the world works. Ruthless, so be blunt. It's not so ruthless when you have someone in your life to share that pain with. 

I'm a very anti-social and awkward person when it comes to talking to people. I don't know what it is. I'm good at talking to someone and comforting them but when it comes to casual talk, I can't bring myself to engage. I'm bad at maintaining eye-contact with people that I'm not comfortable around either. I guess I'm sorta lackluster in that area of 'confidence'? 

An example:

Meeting up with my advisor so I could update her on my progress regarding the program I'm currently in. Just casual talk, I couldn't do. Even after knowing her for 4 years, it's still difficult for me. 

I don't know, I guess it's certain people. I'm half and half with my boyfriend as well. 

My minds all twisted up and just 

I'm also thinking of actually getting somewhere in life with my singing. If my bf can deal with my yodeling through his house, then I'm sure I'm doing something.

I'm just

Life just has me like a pug on stairs.

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Also, give 'WJSN - Secret' a listen. A tru bop