so i've seen ppl do these moodboards for their themselves and i was like yeah i wanna do that for inspiration so here's mine! 

it probs idk but like i wanted to base it on how i feel. i've been feeling pretty mellow thus the brown color bc im not like really happy rn but i can carry well on my own. i based it on how i felt and what i realized. i'm probably like pretty sad because school's ending and like a lot has been changing between me and a few people i've known since i was younger and idk its weird to drift away from someone and the both of you know it but you're not doing anything about it bc idk thats life. people come and go i guess. im still on good terms with a few. 

ive been so uninspired and i havent been myself for a while so i realized i should get back into what i was so into instead of questioning myself on what i did wrong and why i feel like this and why i feel so alone. i didnt know how to deal with the change happening around me because i didnt know how to deal with myself in the first place. i should really get to know myself this summer huh?? i should get back into drawing and writing and cuddling with my cat and i should really appreciate myself more in order to get things right with others so i know who i should stick around with. because if you don't know you're own worth, you're gonna waste your time away with toxic people. i mean i haven't hung out with a LOT of toxic people but like im surrounded by so many people in general, idk where i stand bc i feel like im so small and leftout. i want to make myself believe im not an outcast somehow. i guess everyone should appreciate themselves more. that's my advice if you feel the same way i do. get to know yourself better and see yourself from a different angle, ya feel me feel-ix? just keep moving forward and dont dwell on what went wrong. maybe try to make a moodboard too just to see the amound of pictures that describe your emotions. get inspired. do something. 

it's also nice to talk about it with someone. i mean even if it means indirectly. i know this one art teacher of mine who sees a lot of potential in me and i forgot she even did. i felt disappointed in myself for a moment there. so i wanted so badly to tell her that i've been feeling so lost but i didnt want to involve her with my problems so i just sent her a post-it telling her "miss. i'm still a little plant and i'll continue to grow so just wait." and she patted me on the back and told me she was proud and yeah, surround yourself with people like that. 

i guess that's it with word vomit with rea wel p