I was feeling pretty down lately because I felt like no one believed in me. I just transferred into a new uni and there are so many new faces and there I was, sitting at the back like a potato. I just came back home after three long years and everything just felt so new and foreign although I basically grew up there. My bestest childhood friends had new friends and it was really awkward for me at first. My dad who wasn't busy before has found a new job and I'm left alone at home everyday with no one to talk to and everything. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him but I just felt really lonely.

I failed to enter the uni I've dreamed about just because I was two minutes late and the slots for trasferrees were closed. I was like, "no, you can't do that, I've worked my off hard just to get my grades up so I could be in this goddamn place." but yeah, I won't be able to do anything about it anyway.

I thought going back home would finally bring me happiness. I get to be with my family, I get to reunite with my friends, I get to do my hobbies more often once again, and I just thought that everything would go back to normal but... a lot has changed in the span of three years.

I felt so alone, y'know? It almost felt like I've lost them.

But then I realized, I wasn't alone. They were still there. I left and they just kept on moving on naturally. They didn't replace me, they were only coursing through life. Everything isn't about me. They had to keep moving forward and it was normal for them to meet new people. I wasn't replaced, they were just adding new people into their life but I'm there. I'm still there in them and after a few weeks, I actually became friends with them too.

Now I'm in a larger group of friends and my dad has a nice job and I'm just really glad that he's happy about it. My sisters all has new jobs and one of them just had a kid and I'm just... so happy. Now that I think about it, I'm actually very lucky to have all these people around me.

My first day at school wasn't so bad as well! I've met new friends and someone even gave me their note since I missed one class.

And before, I was also starting to lose confidence in myself. I thought that my writing skills . Well, it kinda does anyway but I'm ready to improve it now. But then I realized that I had that many unique subs while I write about a fandom that doesn't attract that much attention in AFF compared to the others like EXO and BTS.

I also thought that I'm poop at everything else I do like singing, drawing, and graphic arts, but then I realized that everyone has their own style. I sing a different genre and I draw with a different style and I edit graphics with different techniques. I should stop comparing myself to others so I won't feel like .

And thank you for the amount of unique subs I have. I'm not really a subs or something but knowing that they believe in me just makes me feel so happyyyyyyyyyyyy. Like seriously. Even though I fail them they're still there. I'm just so happy. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

I'm very glad that I managed to see all the good things in life. So please, try to look at the bright side, okay? If you're ever feeling down, it will get better. I've spent three years in misery before and everything's finally patching up. Even though it's a slow process, it's getting better.

THANK YOUUUUU