December 2, 2015 was the day Blackjacks all over the world rejoiced with our queens' surprised comeback in MAMA 2015.

I remember people saying to never forget the date but . . . well . . .

Only to get killed on April 5, 2016.

I think this date is the hardest one to forget no matter how we much we don't want to remember.

What's funny is that I'm still here, waiting for someone to say, "Hey! Happy April Fools Day!" despite celebrating it on the 5th of April. I'm here wishing that for the first time of being a Kpop fangirl, I prayed that YG is actually trolling us all right now. Pathetic. I know.

Two years of hiatus. 

Two years of patience. Of hope. 

All gone away. 

Many of you would say that 'Hey. It's gonna be okay. She's still our 2NE1's maknae no matter what happen.' . As a Blackjack, saying, 'It's hard,' would be an understatement. You know what's the thing that's making me more upset right now? It's the fact that there are the two words in big, bold letters: IF ONLY. 

If only YG did not neglect an artist as talented and as precious as Gong Minzy then she wouldn't have left. She loves her members. She loves their music. She loves to perform and make Blackjacks happy. I mean, what's so hard in giving our Minji her own spotlight when she deserves it?! 

You put us so high with that MAMA 2015 performance and Dara and Bom sightings in the Philippines only to bury our hearts for this day.

This is so surreal, I cannot seem to swallow.

Coz how the hell would you play a card game when a diamond misses, right?

I can't give words of encouragement to my fellow BJs when I think 2NE1 will never be the same without Minzy. When in my heart, it says that 'Yeah. Guess if one's leaving, then let the group break up then.' Maybe I'm just hurt right now that I'm saying this but ! YG screwed her up. I'll say what I want here coz this is my blog. And right now, no one can tell me to not blame YG when we all know, that company could've done better than neglect her. Family, eh? No offense. But if I had long been saying that I am proud as a YG stan . . . . Never again.

I am a Blackjack. A VIP. An INCLE. But a YG stan? You guys can have that name. 

Blackjacks are hurt. Like so freaking bad. Other groups may survive when a member leaves . . . but 2NE1 . . . I love those four with all my heart. In 2NE1 We Trust, right? I'll continue loving and supporting each one of them but I have to be honest with myself. If 2NE1 wouldn't be complete as four queens slaying the world then better to be 2NE1 each going to their solo paths.

Maybe then, it'll be really FOURever despite walking apart.