憧れ : 민슬리 / YEOREUM'S SHADOW
< 憧れ / 민슬리 >
god, i don't want to do this. i'll just cry again, you know that i don't like showing my emotions reum but hey yeoreum. y-yeo, remember our promises to each other? when we said we'd play stress come on at each others wedding? that we'd go to the same university? thank you for being my friend since we were seven and thank you so much for coming over to my table, saying hello and doing my science project with me. i thought you forgot me back then since i really only knew you. taking me to go out to eat icecream when everyone else was mourning over the ferry accident, i just was cursed to be born on the same day wasn't i?
yeoreum, you're really the summer to my life and i'll be drowning now. i'm nothing without you, nothing. i-i don't know how to react, you'll still look after me right? in university, you'll be with me right? i just feel so, i can't. all i can do is think about you, i can recall so much. the memories are flooding me too much i can't. everyone's telling me it'll be fine but how in the world can it all be fine yeoreum? answer me, how do i live like this? it's been a while ever since but i'm coping well to say. i've been doing well, good grades as usual and all.god, everyone called me your shadow and i agree. and answer me this, you remember basic science don't you? how does a shadow exist without the sun? it doesn't, it hides away. but i know you wouldn't like it so i changed and went out, began talking to everyone again.
i love you yeoreum, not the way your boyfriend did but as a friend. thanks for changing me for the better, i stopped being alone. oh god, i feel so pathetic right now but i am, aren't i? pathetic. useless. that's what i am really, believe me yeo don't deny it. thanks for being such a great friend to me and letting me believe, why am i saying so much. i probably have the longes message don't i? oh god my sleeves are wet from me crying now. i just really love you, i'll talk to you everyday if you want, just in my head to you. god what am i saying aish, cho yeoreum. i just love you and miss you so much. the world's cruel and you let me believe it even more, that the world pulls out the best people. i love you, you yeoreum.
one day, one of these nights, let's meet again cho yeoreum.
yeoreum, you're really the summer to my life and i'll be drowning now. i'm nothing without you, nothing. i-i don't know how to react, you'll still look after me right? in university, you'll be with me right? i just feel so, i can't. all i can do is think about you, i can recall so much. the memories are flooding me too much i can't. everyone's telling me it'll be fine but how in the world can it all be fine yeoreum? answer me, how do i live like this? it's been a while ever since but i'm coping well to say. i've been doing well, good grades as usual and all.god, everyone called me your shadow and i agree. and answer me this, you remember basic science don't you? how does a shadow exist without the sun? it doesn't, it hides away. but i know you wouldn't like it so i changed and went out, began talking to everyone again.
i love you yeoreum, not the way your boyfriend did but as a friend. thanks for changing me for the better, i stopped being alone. oh god, i feel so pathetic right now but i am, aren't i? pathetic. useless. that's what i am really, believe me yeo don't deny it. thanks for being such a great friend to me and letting me believe, why am i saying so much. i probably have the longes message don't i? oh god my sleeves are wet from me crying now. i just really love you, i'll talk to you everyday if you want, just in my head to you. god what am i saying aish, cho yeoreum. i just love you and miss you so much. the world's cruel and you let me believe it even more, that the world pulls out the best people. i love you, you yeoreum.
one day, one of these nights, let's meet again cho yeoreum.
< / face 01 > 서지수
< / face 02 > 이미주
< / prsnlty >
Q.SO HOW DO YOU KNOW SEULRI AS?
A.cheerful, reserved, faithful, patient
A.cheerful, reserved, faithful, patient
seulri's the one girl that everybody knows but no one ever notices. it's not that nobody likes her it's just that, even if you did start a conversation for her then it'd be really awkward. she might smile and say hi, cheerful and all, radiating small
stars of joy. seulri will laugh cutely, covering her face and fix her hair and just
smile everything off. faithful and loyal to her friends, she'll always be there for them. the shoulder for them to lean on but even if everyone thinks they know everything about her, who really knows. with a reserved nature, only yeoreum knows the most about seulri which is barely anything. she barely tells anyone anything and it's up to an unhealthy level where she doesn't tell anyone at all which worries everyone but no one just lets her be.
stars of joy. seulri will laugh cutely, covering her face and fix her hair and just
smile everything off. faithful and loyal to her friends, she'll always be there for them. the shoulder for them to lean on but even if everyone thinks they know everything about her, who really knows. with a reserved nature, only yeoreum knows the most about seulri which is barely anything. she barely tells anyone anything and it's up to an unhealthy level where she doesn't tell anyone at all which worries everyone but no one just lets her be.
"the thing is that even if you did want to know seulri, you never could. she'd hide away as much as she could run away, she's afraid to say. i'm just guessing but everyone knows seulri, she smiles along with yeoreum. that's how she is, she'll smile and cheer you up and she's faithful to us too, she's stuck with us ever since no matter what. she hardly ever gets mad, really. seulri's never been mad at all or angry, she understands us well. but i wish she told us more, she lives up to her name doesn't she? min seulri is really minddeulre"
< / trivias >
01. seulri shares the same birthday as the sewol ferry incident, the
only person who celebrated it with seulri was yeoreum.
02. yeoreum and seulri shared a promise that when they got married, they'd play big byung at each other's wedding.
only person who celebrated it with seulri was yeoreum.
02. yeoreum and seulri shared a promise that when they got married, they'd play big byung at each other's wedding.
03. she has already been accepted at yonsei university much to everyone else's surprise. seulri didn't tell anyone until they asked what university she was planning to go to, she had already submitted her application before her graduation. seulri's planning to major in sociology.
04. honestly to say, she's either smiling or has a neutral expression. none of her friends think they know what she's feeling since she never shows it at all. but when she panics sure but her heartrate quickens and seulri gets nauseous. she feels like her stomach is stabbing her and it hurts too much for her to handle. if she's pressured, there are times when she's about to faint too.
05. in high school, she was often ranked in the top three and ever since she studied so much, yeoreum joked a lot and called her a nerd. with her head stuck in books and researching about random topics, seulri was a nerd to say.
06. her dream before was to become an engineer but her mother disapproved of her dream, saying that it was crap. she's planning to be a marketing analyst or at least, work in the humanatarian field for now.
07. has never dated anybody which is why everyone else teases her a lot
08. stands about at 158cm which is why a lot of people use her head as armrest, jokingly calling her shortie. especially the guys in their circle and ask if they can piggyback her
09. often scrunches her nose at things, when she's disgusted or dislikes something. seulri will scrunch her nose and everyone else finds it weird or adorable. just like that.
10. currently owns a part time job at a florist, she spends her time admiring flowers and researching their meanings.
11. her favourite flowers are peonies
12. was part of the student council, even if no one else expected it. she was the vice-president which led to everyone calling her 'vice president seul' for the whole year. they still do, as a joke but that's it.
04. honestly to say, she's either smiling or has a neutral expression. none of her friends think they know what she's feeling since she never shows it at all. but when she panics sure but her heartrate quickens and seulri gets nauseous. she feels like her stomach is stabbing her and it hurts too much for her to handle. if she's pressured, there are times when she's about to faint too.
05. in high school, she was often ranked in the top three and ever since she studied so much, yeoreum joked a lot and called her a nerd. with her head stuck in books and researching about random topics, seulri was a nerd to say.
06. her dream before was to become an engineer but her mother disapproved of her dream, saying that it was crap. she's planning to be a marketing analyst or at least, work in the humanatarian field for now.
07. has never dated anybody which is why everyone else teases her a lot
08. stands about at 158cm which is why a lot of people use her head as armrest, jokingly calling her shortie. especially the guys in their circle and ask if they can piggyback her
09. often scrunches her nose at things, when she's disgusted or dislikes something. seulri will scrunch her nose and everyone else finds it weird or adorable. just like that.
10. currently owns a part time job at a florist, she spends her time admiring flowers and researching their meanings.
11. her favourite flowers are peonies
12. was part of the student council, even if no one else expected it. she was the vice-president which led to everyone calling her 'vice president seul' for the whole year. they still do, as a joke but that's it.
< / cnnctns >
CHO YEOREUM / seulri's sunshine
they weren't the best of friends, yeoreum had her best friend but she was the best friend seulri had. seulri followed yeoreum around, if to say yeoreum's summer then seulri has to be the autumn that follows right after. they aren't dating or is she romantically interested in yeoreum but to say, they complete each other. there isn't a yeoreum without seulri nor is there a seulri without yeoreum. the two had fun, celebrating each others birthdays and whatnot as well as just enjoying time together, the two have been together since they were seven. they want to keep it that way, they need to keep it that way. because to put it basically, they complete each other and sure yeoreum has better friends but seulri depends on yeoreum too much. a shadow only has the sun so that it can shine but the sun doesn't need the shadow to live on. it just goes on like that and that's really how seulri and yeoreum are. ever so close with affection and giggles, there's no simpler way to put them.
PART I.
'hey are you lonely?' the girl looks at the other who's sitting alone in her pretty, white dress. no one wants to befriend her, she looks smarter and richer than everyone else. everyone knows each other already and yeoreum who just moved to south korea, didn't really know anybody. seulri shook her head and gave yeoreum her hand.
'i'm min seulri' she smiled as the other girl took her hand. yeoreum smiled back and looked at the other girl. seulri dusted the nonexistent dust on her dress and nodded, content with how everything was.
'like the flower?' yeoreum asked, pointing to the dandelions that were sitting right next to them. some other kids plucked them from the ground and went to wish upon the flowers. seulri nodded, picking up a dandelion and giving it to yeoreum. yeoreum then put the flower in her hair, smiling.
PART I.
'hey are you lonely?' the girl looks at the other who's sitting alone in her pretty, white dress. no one wants to befriend her, she looks smarter and richer than everyone else. everyone knows each other already and yeoreum who just moved to south korea, didn't really know anybody. seulri shook her head and gave yeoreum her hand.
'i'm min seulri' she smiled as the other girl took her hand. yeoreum smiled back and looked at the other girl. seulri dusted the nonexistent dust on her dress and nodded, content with how everything was.
'like the flower?' yeoreum asked, pointing to the dandelions that were sitting right next to them. some other kids plucked them from the ground and went to wish upon the flowers. seulri nodded, picking up a dandelion and giving it to yeoreum. yeoreum then put the flower in her hair, smiling.
'i'm cho yeoreum, i'm sure we'll be good friends seulri'
PART II.
everyone couldn't stop thinking about the sewol ferry accident and while sure, seulri was saddened and shocked by the news. she doodled cakes and balloons in her exercise book, thinking about everything. she was a year older but no one, even her family had wished her a happy birthday. everyone's too busy with sewol she assumed and even when she planned to buy herself a small cake, it couldn't happen since it seemed so out of place.
'hey seul! want to get some icecream?' yeoreum waved at seulri, clinging to her arm and looking at her. seulri, confused out of her mind since she thought that yeoreum would go think about the accident. seulri nodded and allowed yeoreum to drag her to the nearest icecream parlour. pushing seulri to a table and before seulri could say anything, yeoreum came back with two cups of icecream. putting one near seulri and smiling as usual.
'happy birthday minddeulre' yeoreum smiled as seulri just nodded, scooping up a small piece and eating it quietly. muttering a small 'thank you' as the other grinned happily, glad that her friend was okay. she knew that it was her birthday but nobody had paid attention to seulri. she tried to give the money to yeoreum to pay back, it wasn't right of her to not pay. yeoreum shook her head, eating her icecream and said with a mouth of icecream :
'happy birthday minddeulre' yeoreum smiled as seulri just nodded, scooping up a small piece and eating it quietly. muttering a small 'thank you' as the other grinned happily, glad that her friend was okay. she knew that it was her birthday but nobody had paid attention to seulri. she tried to give the money to yeoreum to pay back, it wasn't right of her to not pay. yeoreum shook her head, eating her icecream and said with a mouth of icecream :
'it's a birthday present seulri, take it. besides, you should have a great birthday shouldn't you?'
they said that time flies over us and leaves its shadow
AHN YEONJIN / seulri'scrush unrequited love
AHN YEONJIN / seulri's
yeonjin's a year older than seulri but she's known him ever since middle school. he was that one cool upperclassmen who is the perfect guy in every shoujou anime and manga. he was close with yeoreum but never in the circle and seulri liked him a lot, the way he talked and how he could just join in any conversation and no one would get mad. seulri really liked him that it turned to love, yeoreum gave her his number and they'd text late at night. yeonjin helping seulri with her homework and asking her for help with science since seulri was advanced in science.
the two developed a close bond but it worried him that she wouldn't tell him anything at all, wondering why min seulri was like that. he didn't like her at first, thinking that she was cute just like her little sister. he never noticed her blushing and craving for his affection because he only started noticing after yeoreum's death he doesn't even know how he feels for seulri since it never struck to him as something he should pay attention too. sure, seulri would be the perfect girlfriend and wife but he wasn't exactly sure, if he did want to date seulri or not. but seulri, all she knows is that she loves ahn yeonjin. very much.
the two developed a close bond but it worried him that she wouldn't tell him anything at all, wondering why min seulri was like that. he didn't like her at first, thinking that she was cute just like her little sister. he never noticed her blushing and craving for his affection because he only started noticing after yeoreum's death he doesn't even know how he feels for seulri since it never struck to him as something he should pay attention too. sure, seulri would be the perfect girlfriend and wife but he wasn't exactly sure, if he did want to date seulri or not. but seulri, all she knows is that she loves ahn yeonjin. very much.
how is it that i can't sleep yet i still dream of you
< / reaction to the "incident" >
seulri never did show any emotions on her face but she was shocked, to see the
one closest to her on the ground. she should've paid attention to the road and what was happening but she had to be asleep at the time. fast asleep with her head on someone else's shoulder, dreaming about what her life in university would be like. blood covering yeoreum's face and seulri went to touch her face, 'no no no no no no no'. reciting it like a mantra, she couldn't process what was happening. her face was stinging and her head hurted, a slight head injury from the accident and her arm was stinging too much.
she could never believe it, hoping that it was one of yeoreum's many pranks. that the next day, yeoreum would grin and say 'sorry seulri for worrying you, it's all a joke'. one of her numerous jokes and that it was a lie but someone else patted her back.
reassuring her that yeoreum was in a better place. she couldn't help it but tears fell and for the first time to her friends, they witnessed min seulri cry and fall to the ground, helpless and all.
but they couldn't help but feel pity for the girl. since her other half, the sunshine of her life was gone. and at that moment, seulri wished she was the one in yeoreum's position, seulri was the one who should've died instead of yeoreum.
one closest to her on the ground. she should've paid attention to the road and what was happening but she had to be asleep at the time. fast asleep with her head on someone else's shoulder, dreaming about what her life in university would be like. blood covering yeoreum's face and seulri went to touch her face, 'no no no no no no no'. reciting it like a mantra, she couldn't process what was happening. her face was stinging and her head hurted, a slight head injury from the accident and her arm was stinging too much.
she could never believe it, hoping that it was one of yeoreum's many pranks. that the next day, yeoreum would grin and say 'sorry seulri for worrying you, it's all a joke'. one of her numerous jokes and that it was a lie but someone else patted her back.
reassuring her that yeoreum was in a better place. she couldn't help it but tears fell and for the first time to her friends, they witnessed min seulri cry and fall to the ground, helpless and all.
but they couldn't help but feel pity for the girl. since her other half, the sunshine of her life was gone. and at that moment, seulri wished she was the one in yeoreum's position, seulri was the one who should've died instead of yeoreum.
< / how are they after "the incident" >
seulri's head still hurted and covered the small scar on her forehead, praying that her arm would heal in time for university. she knew about yeoreum's depression, she never thought of it much at all, if yeoreum did tell her then seulri would just answer with 'i know'.
telling herself that it was all a thing that cho yeoreum would do, legwarmers were a fashion trend.she'd smile and continue her life, trying to smile like before. if the others didn't think on how seulri felt, they'd think that she was perfectly okay.
she tried hiding away all the photos of her and yeoreum and ignored everyone else on line and kakaotalk but soon, the chat died with everyone still crying over the loss of yeoreum. she was doing okay, seulri believed in the positive side or tried to at least, seulri was mad at herself. depending so much on yeoreum and not bothering to befriend anyone else. she couldn't sleep, everynight she was thinking about yeoreum and deleting her contact off her phone, forgetting eveyrthing. she continued but she could never sleep or eat icecream, everything that happened with yeoreum couldn't continue. everything was haunting her.
telling herself that it was all a thing that cho yeoreum would do, legwarmers were a fashion trend.she'd smile and continue her life, trying to smile like before. if the others didn't think on how seulri felt, they'd think that she was perfectly okay.
she tried hiding away all the photos of her and yeoreum and ignored everyone else on line and kakaotalk but soon, the chat died with everyone still crying over the loss of yeoreum. she was doing okay, seulri believed in the positive side or tried to at least, seulri was mad at herself. depending so much on yeoreum and not bothering to befriend anyone else. she couldn't sleep, everynight she was thinking about yeoreum and deleting her contact off her phone, forgetting eveyrthing. she continued but she could never sleep or eat icecream, everything that happened with yeoreum couldn't continue. everything was haunting her.
< / what were they doing before it happened >
fast asleep on someone else's shoulder, she doesn't remember who but she clearly recalls it being a guy's. it was a nice nap, dozing off and dreaming. before that, she was talking to everyone else. her eyebrows furrowed as she was insisting that big byung was a suitable song for a wedding. yeoreum was with seulri, yelling that it can and that the two will make it happen. before another conversation struck in, she went off thinking about the degree she wanted to do and thinking about her future. she was happy to say, seulri had finished high school and already was accepted by yonsei. it'd all be okay, she'd fly to the states and find a career there. it'd all be okay.
the car sped up and as seulri was about to question what was going on, she could hear shinee's symptoms play in the background. someone must've decided on a shinee binge she assumed and she looked at yeoreum. she was smiling at seulri, like it was all good. everything would be fine. the girl motioned for seulri to come closer, whispering a joke to her. seulri laughed softly until she saw yeoreum's eyes watering. it all happened to quickly, the last thing she remembered was the song ending.
the car sped up and as seulri was about to question what was going on, she could hear shinee's symptoms play in the background. someone must've decided on a shinee binge she assumed and she looked at yeoreum. she was smiling at seulri, like it was all good. everything would be fine. the girl motioned for seulri to come closer, whispering a joke to her. seulri laughed softly until she saw yeoreum's eyes watering. it all happened to quickly, the last thing she remembered was the song ending.
" 못 살 거야 나 널 놓치면
i can't live if i lose you "
i can't live if i lose you "
< / commnts > she's inspired by a dandelion if you're wondering and i tried hurrying this but hAH i'm always slow. like a snail, a very slow snail to be honest. i feel so unsatisfied by this for some reason, aish. but i hope you like seulri! she's so bad and terrible but hey, it'll do for now. she's not emo or quiet but like uh how to explain really, if it's not clear just ask me. ill try to complete my hea app too but then like hAH who knows. slap me jsy okno but really, i need to focus on my exams. she seems like everyone else so i cry but anyway, i hope you do like seulri! hwaiting for the story!
< / questns > first why i have my exams near too ( ah yes exams much fun i cri ). second why do u always come up with such good storylines urgh i cry. bye.
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