hey guys I'm sorry for the lack of updates and communication. It's just.... January 2nd is coming up and I'm still working through my grief of Jakob dying... And I guess I kinda just started to get afraid that everyone is going to leave so I've either pushed away or climbed to some people without even explaining why. And I'm sorry for that. Honestly I want to talk to all of you guys again like I use to when he was alive but I just can't bring up enough happiness to be able to