I know this is a kind of deep thought, but I get bugged by people who think idols are gods.

My friends always look at me wierdly if I mention anything about liking Key. I do sometimes refer to him as the boy I like or my dream boyfriend or the person I admire and want to be like. He's the reason I like keys, pink, leapord print, and stars more and more. My friends get excited, thinking that it might be somebody they know. I just explain that he's famous and they all make a face and tell me to stop joking around and find a boyfriend already.

But nobody realized I'm being serious. I do have a crush on him. If Key wasn't famous and I just met him randomly, back before he even died his hair, and we could communicate with each other fairly well, I know I'd think he was interesting, feel attracted to him and want to be his friend. I can't explain it, I just know. He's not the first celebrity I thought was cute in my life, but he's the one I came to honestly love the most.

Why do people think just because their famous people that they become like gods? That you can't really know anything about them, feel close, or know them in a deeper level? I know more about him than most people who claim to be friends with me. I \dols are humans too, very much human. Being popular doesn't change that. Does that mean you have to distance yourself, admire them from afar, and give up any thought of ever knowing them? Do you have to get real and limit yourself to only trying to reach boys around you that are somewhere in your future, even more mysterious because you haven't met them?

I just don't understand their way of thinking, or the lack of it. Are you going to not try to be friends with the popular guy in school just because other people like him? You see him everyday, you go to the same classes, you live in the same town. So what makes him unreachable? I think he's not and there's a reason why he's popular. You can be friends or even date him if you make an effort to talk to him. No person is all around better than any other because at the heart of it we're all the same. We breathe, eat, and . We hurt, cry, love, okay? Even if they're from another country and you don't speak the same language, the foundations of both of you are the same. The popular kid isn't far from you and famous people may be, but not as far as some think.

I don't think for certain I'll magically meet Key, he'll fall in love with me and we'll magically be togetehr in Korea or something like that. I don't obsess over him, claim he is mine and bash other Lockets. I won't cry in despair if he gets a girlfriend. I won't stop liking him if he leaves the group and quits music and I won't for SHINee either if it's the opposite. I'm a fan. I support their music, their dream, and everything they share. Learning about them and collecting things is to show that support and love I have as a mere number to them. It's a hobby, not a religion, yet I'm still a shallow for life.

I just support him and love him unconditionally as a fan of everything he is and represents for me. It's not the normal love you have for someone you want to date or family. It's more like fate, more everlasting and not a forced bond. Fans will love their idols longer, if not more deeply. If they're true, not just obsessed with how cool they look.

So I wish my friends wouldn't see them as untouchable gods that sould only be seen, heard, and considered plastic because they are real, just talented, and I wish they wouldn't see me as a lovesick, obsessed fan girl when they don't understand what it means to be a fan. I do believe that being a loyal fan, someday I will have my chance to meet SHINee and hopefully have just five seconds to tell Key that he is the best. Because that's the only thing I truly want to express to him. He already gives so much for his fans by choosing such a difficult life to live, so I don't demand anything from him. I feel like he is giving me love back through the merchandise and songs he releases. I'm just a number giving support among millions and to him it's numbers he's giving things too. But it doesn't mean there's not feelings and sincerity involved when we do those actions.

I said a lot haha. Do you understand my gibberish at all? Anyway, just saying my love for Key is real but it's not the same as crushes between aquaintances so it shouldn't be judged by the same standards. So, my friends, don't do that and you don't do it either! But if there's truly obsessed girls that say they're married to them, try to get them to sign a marriage contract, throw things to get their attention, or attempt to pull them off stage, then maybe you should help them get their heads straight.

Love y'alls!