Honey, dear, I am so worried about you, I really do. I've been there before once. My friends, everyone, isolated me and things at home didn't go well. I know how you feel, I swear I do. But be patient, dear. It gets better, it well. Even though the magic won't happen in a blink of an eye, you'll be happy, trust me. Leave everything behind, look a head and never glance at your past. Never reminisces, never hope. If you hope to much, it'll hurt more if everything starts to go down the slope again. Man yourself up, pick up your own broken pieces. It's okay to frown, it's okay to be ignorant because it'll protect your heart. It's okay to breakdown and cry and it's okay to cry yourself to sleep. You don't have to wait for anyone, anybody, be it a prince or a friend, to mend you back into shape. You yourself support your back, get up and fight again. I've think about suicide before, I think about it now. I did self harm before, punching and hitting the walls with my hands till it bruised and bled. It hurts but I wanted it to hurt- that's the point because I couldn't feel anything. I was ready to cut myself and die but I managed to collect myself together, stand up and live my life the way I wanted to. I told myself that I'm going to live for myself, not for any bastards that'll break my heart later. I will stop giving my heart and trust easily from now on. When I grow up, I will get out from this hell and be free. That's what I always, always told myself and it keeps me going, until now. And things gets better. I could get better and so do you. I love you, honey. I do.

it's okay to let it out, it's okay to not fake your smiles and let people know that you're not okay. sometimes suppressing it is the wrong choice. I know things are hard, but maybe weeks or months or years from now, you will have reached the happiness and relief that you're searching for. things can get better, so just stay strong, love!