A Difficult, Dramatic, Intense, Life Changing Choice... Welp...

Well, after 8 long years of school, I'm finally graduating from my University on May 29th... YAY!

Or, at least I think so...

Because I'm a person who has to have everything planned (and I mean EVERY. SINGLE. DETAIL), I have already been hired by one place I had been wanting to work for as far as I can remember. Even though you must have at least have a Masters Degree in order to be hired, I was blessed enough to be accepted into that company with open arms, which leads me to a word of advice - studying and obtaining good grades gets you far in life! Anyways, things are pretty much made for me. Basically, at this point, I'm just waiting to graduate, I pretty much have my dream job, AND I've already got a place to stay in California which I will be rooming with one of my good friends. Yep... things are great.

That's what I originally thought... that was until my parents called me last weekend.

You see, my parents and I live over 1400 miles from each other. My parents are not the richest, however, they're not poor, and they worry about me constantly... even though I'm an adult who can make perfectly mature and wise decisions myself. So, of course, they can't afford to fly out and see me every single weekend. When I start working at my dream job, I won't have a lot of weekends or holidays off because for the first two years, I'll be in hardcore training. Yeah, I feel bad that my parents won't be able to see me that often; however, it's my life too, you know? So when my mom called me last weekend, she said something that literally broke my heart:

"Come back home, Sweetie," My mother almost cried through the phone, "Me and Daddy miss you..."

So, of course, the inner child within me broke at her words. I felt so awful for excluding her and my father from my life, that the guilt nearly ate me alive. In addition to my mom begging for me to stay, she offered to pay for a small apartment which I could live in for rent free until I could fully afford it on my own. It was a good offer, I have to admit; however, things were already settled for me back in California. How could I just leave what I already have set up?

Yet, I love my parents a lot, and I have been missing them throughout the years while I've been away at college. And since I won't be able to see them as often as I used to, because of my work, I'm going to miss them even more. Family means A LOT to me. I could see my life going great in California OR back in my hometown...

So I have a decision to make: stay in California where I'll have my dream job, a nice apartment, and my good friends that I've made throughout the years... or go back home - where I can finally see my parents on a daily basis, spending lost time with them, and stay in my own apartment which will be rent free.

Uggghhh... What to do...

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ktvftw #1 Apr 20, 2015 00:30:25

Dang man, I don't know :\ There's a lot to weigh on both sides, and the fact that each side has so much to offer for making a final decision.

In my opinion, I think that going with your dream job and making a really strong effort to visit family would be best. While you get a free apartment and spend a lot more time with family, you guys will all be busy with things even if the distance is shortened a lot. I'm not sure about you, but I would also feel really guilty about having my parents pay for my expenses, even if I could've done it myself.

Although, looking at it from the other perspective, time is really precious. Having it is a blessing, but I personally think having too much of it decreases its value by a lot. Me visiting family for a week and spending quality time with them would be better than me visiting them for a month while lazing around because there wouldn't be enough to do in an entire month with them. This however can change based on how strong your bond with them truly is.

If you happen to choose your dream job, I would suggest spending your break (whenever it starts, or possibly even earlier if you have the means to make it happen) with them and make memorable experiences so that they can remember those until the next time you guys meet. Another thing to note is that while two years is a long time, afterwards you'll have more time and will be able to spend it with your parents.

All in all, I think you should give that job a shot and if you don't feel right doing it then stop and rethink, but the decision is all up to you. Also, I probably sound super biased so feel free to ignore what I'm saying now. As someone that follows your stories (and I guess now your personal life :P) I'll support whatever decision you make and I hope you'll be very happy with it in the future :)

Umji4life #2 Apr 19, 2015 23:53:39

This is tough. I mean, I get where you're coming from: Family vs Dream Job. I would love to have the dream job. However, I don't want to make empty promises to my parents about 'coming back to see you'. Then again, you can't really just give up on the job right? I was thinking, if it was possible to set up a Skype session? Like sort of a weekly thing. You know, they can see you through it, and they know you're doing OK. You aren't physically there with them, but its still something :)

But I agree with you: this is no easy decision. Hence, weigh your choices before deciding! I'll provide the moral support haha! ^^

Eririn #3 Apr 19, 2015 22:13:38

Is there a job available for you back home? If no, then I think you should give your dream job a shot. Otherwise you will always be thinking at the back of your mind, what if you had taken up that job.