CLOSE ENCOUNTERS WITH THE THIRD KIND ● SISTINE BIANCHI

"just me up." + my name's sistine and i'm a theatre heaux and lowkey thottie. my baddest binch likes to call me a freak but i'm like??? girl i'm just reciting lyrics from drake aubrey graham in the style of a gregorian chant. i'm a manhattan binch and only recently moved to modesto. i live with my momma and i love her very much. i'm an #aaemployee and my soul is owned by aa and the sims 4. oh also check out my mixtape "ten little indians, one big fire" on soundcloud.
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basic info
name: sistine bianchi
nicknames:
+ freak :: her friend bi'nh calls her this when she's doing something ugly like reciting nicki minaj lyrics in the style of a gregorian chanter. or when sistine's flapping her hand around and creepily caressing bi'nh's fingernail. bi'nh is usually like "stop you freak!" and sistine almost pees herself laughing
+ chapel :: because she was name after the sistine chapel, get it?
birthday: 07/29 + 17
ethnicity: somali and French
birthplace: manhattan, new york
timeline
+ manhattan :: 16 years
+ Modesto :: 1 year
languages
+ english :: native
+ spanish :: proficient
faceclaim: kim johansson ( aka kimberslay )
backup faceclaim: zendaya
 
style: anything and everything american apparel. she works there, and aaemployees have to stay "on trend" so she usually ends up giving most of her paycheck back to the store because she's always buying from there.
appearance: sistine is beauty, she's grace, she's miss step on my face. she's a bi-racial beauty who makes everyone else pale in comparison. her body is rather thin, yet curvy. she has really, really nice s like dang and she has a really cute ( thanks mom ).
 
height: 5'0" and 155cm
weight: 103 lbs and 47kg
 
anything else: 20.1 bmi 
who are you truly?
personality traits
+ positive: girly, whimsical, trusting, affectionate, childlike
+ negative: over dramatic, clumsy, WEIRD, airheaded, gullible, childish.
personality:
sistine bianchi is one weird . like what the hell happened to her? why is she like this. this hoe dubbed all of the bangtan members as members of a dance crew. we have: tap monsta the tap dancer, j-toes the ballerina; suga foot the quickstep dancer; jimin-y cricket tap monsta's sidekick; v-jay the burlesque dancer, jung-foot the toddler who is just learning to walk. she's always noticing weird things about people like how small their ears are or their nostrils. she has dreams in the style of japanese surrealist author haruki murakami. whenever she falls, she always manages to not so subtly pose like she totally meant to do that. in all of her notebooks there are always some ugly scribblings that are both accurate depictions of people yet also look like they were drawn by a five year old. she can and will rap every nicki verse in the style of gregorian chants.

if sistine bianchi hears a noise at night, her first thought is "i'm gonna be murdered. goodbye world i lived a good life i hope heaven has hot angels to me up". if she gets shampoo in her eyes she thinks, "welp i guess i'm blind now i will never be able to see my first born child". if a cop walks past her she immediately goes "i guess i'm being arrested i probably murdered someone by servin up these looks". she goes off in a metal detector, "oh no they've detected my bomb i'm gonna be deemed a terrorist by the us government".

sistine came out of her mom falling and embarrassing herself. life with sistine is like living in a constant infomercial, dropping and spilling and breaking things in the most improbable way ever. putting on eyeliner and mascara is like playing russian roulette because she'll either get it all over her face or jab her eye out. icy surfaces basically equals impending death. she is 19 years old and she still forgets when she has a beverage in and just starts talking. she's ran into more poles than a stripper, standing too close to her is a liability, she can hardly ever look graceful, and even if she does, it's gone in a moment's notice. sistine's honestly a simple girl who puts her bra on one at a time. she's best described as "kool aid in a wine glass" because she looks very high maintenance and unreachable but its funny because sistine is honestly just a dumb short kid who likes bugs and magical girls and anime too much. sistine is not the brightest crayon in the box--not by far. one time she tried to jump over a chair put ended up tripping over it mid-air and was practically split in half by it. sistine still counts on her fingers and uses a calculator to get "2+2". she once said, "a circle has 8 sides".

sistine gets excited over weird and mundane things that make people think she's crazy. if she sees bunnies playing she'll coo in adoration, or she'll gasp and place a hand over her heart if a baby grabs her finger, she stops to pet every pet, and nearly cries when she gets extra chicken nuggets with her happy meal, despite that sistine is much more tough than the world gives her credit for. don't be fooled by the big eyes and the flowy clothing--sistine is a force to be reckoned with, she has no fear of bugs and no desire to be anyone's damsel in distress! sistine is very trusting, to the point that she's gullible; she doesn't really question things or people because she trusts that they won't lie to her. someone once told her that they'd hold her wallet and wait for her while she rode a roller coaster, and she gave her wallet to them, and long story short that was the first time she got robbed. she has to be extra careful because she might get scammed or kidnapped or worse. one time her teacher told her he was going on an historical expedition in germany and she believed him. turns out he was on paternity leave and the look on sistine's face was priceless. she's also playful and whimsical, and if you hang out with her enough, you'll find yourself laughing at yourself more and taking life less seriously. sistine loves expressing her love for everyone, hugs and kisses for all!! skinship is her specialty and she's always cooing over how cute and pretty everyone is and sistine always seems to be hanging off of someone because wowie zowie they're so soft and squishy and cute. she loves seeing happy couples everywhere and she can't help but stare when they kiss and hold hands--in fact, she can't help pointing is disbelief and gaping when she sees a couple because, she can't get a boyfriend and they're so cute!

sistine is the most beautiful and delicate flower (her words). she takes great pride in being a girl. sistine is light, a lil ball of light. even though she may take a few things too seriously, sistine always ends up laughing at herself because wow can she be embarrassing at times. she's a rather pleasant person and always tries to have a smile on her face and always tries her best to help people. she believes everyone deserves a chance and needs a friend, so sistine will go out of her way to befriend even the scariest looking person. she takes great care of her skin and carefully plans out every outfit. sistine loves beauty products and is very handy when it comes to grooming. sistine just radiates ultra-feminity. she allows herself to be vulnerable and even though she's dumb, she knows that getting hurt is a part of life and you can't prevent it. she never feels the need to compete with other women, only herself to be the best sistine bianchi she can be. she is very gentle and humble tries her best not to complain and be negative because everyone is going through tough times and nobody needs a debbie downer. it is very, very clear that sistine is still a giant child. she loves cartoons, especially shows like steven universe and teen titans, and she sill wears footie pajamas. she sleeps with like 50 stuffed animals because they'll protect her from monsters and yes, all 50 of them need to be on the bed. sure, it can be annoying sometimes when you're arguing with her and she just sticks her fingers in her ears and shouts "lalallala!" or when she claims she's an adult one second but then asks you to kiss her owie the next or when she asks you to check the room for monsters because she swears she heard something. but at the same time, the way her eyes sparkle like the stars in the sky when you tell her about something she's never heard before, the way she just trusts you undoubtedly to do the right thing, the way she'll just cuddle up with you is also pretty cool.

 
background
sistine bianchi's life was filled with love and joy and happiness. she was born in manhattan which helped to fuel her love for theatre and musicals. her dad is a deadbeat who walked out on her mom as soon as she got pregnant, and his abscence hasn't really affected her much honestly. her mom taught her to love being black and taught her things like how to do her hair and how to put weave in. she and her mom moved to modesto this year because her recieved a new job doing what she loves as a makeup artist.
 
likes
+ chicago style popcorn :: the cheese and caramel kind omg she's in love with it
+ graydon's cooking :: he's such a good cook he can make everything.
+ her mom :: her mom means the world to her, she's beautiful and perfect and wise.
+ music she can fall asleep too :: its much easier on her ears than like edm music.
+ theatre :: its so magical and so immersive and amazing
+ her 3ds :: she also plays her 3ds a lot. it's pink and she loves it.

 
dislikes
+ maxine price :: sistine thinks she has a bad attitude and all that negativity is not good for the skin!
+ the south :: confederate flags and racists, there really isn't need for explanation
+ hypermasculinity :: put some damn makeup on guys and stop complainin if ya ugly. also stop acting like being a man is something special y'all are mediocre at best.
+ whitewashing history :: the stonewall riots were started by trans and queer women of color not some ugly white boy. poc didn't just magically appear in europe as slaves, they've been there since the 15th century as merchants.
+ passive aggressiveness :: ????? why would you do that??
+ being called sistine chapel :: she will kill you if you call her this it stopped being funny 11 years ago guys come up with a new joke.
hobbies
+ rapping :: she's dropping her mixtape based on sherman alexie's ten little indians called "tell little indians, one big fire"
+ sewing :: she loves sewing and she loves making her own clothes.
+ playing the sims 4 :: she's basically sold her soul to ea.
habits
+ she has two laughs: the "oh" laugh in which she sounds like the count from seasame stree, and the "anime girl" laugh in which she giggles like an anime girl
+ she always wakes up with really weird things on her mind like "what if people had coconut shavings for eyebrows" and "tis i, the frenchiest of fries"
+ is always tagging her friends in ugly facebook posts and vines

+ grabs her s when she's scared
falls asleep listening to music.
 
fears
+ dentists :: one time her dentist took her tooth out with a wrench. she cries every time she has to go to the dentist.
+ birds :: they will swoop down and poop on you. she will scream at the top of her lungs and hit the decks if she sees a bird flying at her.
+ eye and oral gore :: she cannot stand seeing someone who had 20 teeth knocked out or see a guy have his eyeball scooped from his socket sorry if she's not normal bc of that but she just hates oral and eye gore. she gets super queasy when she sees it and quite literally throws up.
+ going down south :: she's terrified of the south because they're so racist she doesn't want to die young so she'll stay out of the south thanks.

 
trivia
+ haruki muraki almost always appears in her dreams doing weird mundae . like one time she was in a super market and haruki murakami was there and she was like "its haruki murakami just me up" and he looked at her, smiled and nodded with a thumbs up. and then everything went dark and it was like a play and all these other men in black wearing smiling haruki marukami masks surrounded her in the produce section and just kept nodding at her.
+ has approximately 3000 more instagram followers than maxine does
+ girls like to compliment her s
+ works at american apparel with her best binch bi'nh
+ she doesn't understand the hype around lana del rey like can someone please explain to her?? also why would you want your pwussy to taste like pepsi cola?? pepsi is gross af.
+ janelle monae and drake are her favs
+ even though a majority of somalis are muslim, sistine and her mother are not.
+ if you litter, sistine will literally fight you.
+ her face is extremely expressive and really hinders her when she tries to lie.

 
FAMILY:
+ muva : thembeline bianchi : 42 : makeup artist : 10
 
FRIENDS
+ bad es in crime : bi'nh mai : 17 : american apparel employee : 10 
+ practically dating : graydon mars : 17 : pizza delivery guy : 8
OTHERS
rival : maxine price : 18 : idk mayor's daughter? real life regina george? : 2
#theinterview
you got invited to the 'biggest party of the year', how do you react? 
+ i don't think i was actually invited by maxine, but on facebook everyone sent me the invite and everyone wanted me to go, so here i am.
 
thoughts on maxine pryse? *coughs*
+ she seems like... regina george only in 2015. i sat with her and her friends for lunch one day and she was talking about her 2000 instagram followers and i was like "only 2000? i have over 5000!" and she got so upset she told me to tone that don't becuase "um excuse me i'm the top around here". and i couldn't tell if she was joking or not.
 
did you know her dad's the mayor??
+ he is? but more importantly did you know my mom is like the 15th cousin 12 times removed from a somali prince?
 
were you even relatively interested in the random glowy thing in the yard?
+ hell yeah i saw it and i was "oh my gaud" and me bein the that i am went to go touch it and max was like "hoe don't do it" and then these hot aliens came out and i was like "just me up
 
would you let an alien live in your house?
+ i would have to keep them in my closet, but hale yeah.
 
do you find aliens to be cool?
+ bruh yes. especially if they're vulcan because i have this weird thing for vulcans like zq just me up daddy. space is so cool and aliens are so cool because like there are so many possibilities on what aliens can be like oh my gaud 
 
can you please tell me why the aliens are so... hot?
+ heaux i'm askin myself that too because honestly.
 
ok but seriously lmao would you bang or nah??
+ Yeah probably because i'm such a heaux. i'd probs wear their nutsacks as eyepatches honestly like i would let them buss in me so hard just me up
 
got any plans for the future?
+ i'll probably become a teacher and then help teach kids in developing countries.
 
what is your life like right now?
+ well first i wake up and pee and wash my face and then i go downstairs and tell my mom i love her and then i go to school and hang out with bi'nh and gray and then i go to work after school from like 5 pm to like 11 pm and then i go home and play the sims until like 5 am and then i check insta before going to bed.
 
what knowledge of earth would you offer to your alien comrade?
+ black culture baby :: she wants to teach him how black culture shapes mainstream culture. how hip hop is revolutionary and how without black people vine wouldn't be nearly as popular as it is today and how black culture shapes modern culture all over the world because black people are beautiful and amazing and sistine loves being black.
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who's this freak?
alias: lee jooheon
nicknames:
+ Mango lee :: sistine is always coming up with weird names for people because they sound cool.
birthday: 10/06 + 21
ethnicity: korean
faceclaim + backup: lee jooheon + MARTIN SENSMEIER
languages: max 4 that they're best at, bc even aliens aren't perfect at every language
+ english :: he probably speaks some weird alien language too but he also speaks english which is good.
 
what's the story?
PERSONALITY TRAITS
+ POSITIVE: bold, fair, tough, assertive, adventurous
+ NEGATIVE: macho, , competetive, arrogant, jealous
PERSONALITY:
mango lee is a mix of fearless warrior and undisciplined child. he's an easy guy to understand: very action oriented, wanting to be the boss, an extrovert, assertive, the hunter. he is arrogant—although he likes to state that he's just "very confident" thank you very much—and he has an ego the size of jupiter honestly. mango is really fond of himself and in order to get on his good side, give him the praise he thinks he deserves. he has the fire and passion of the burning sun, the boldness of neon colors ( in a non-tacky way ), and the spontaneity of spontaneous combustion. he is masculine and virile—which is just a nice way of saying macho and —and is surprisingly in touch with his inner kid.

he tends to be very silly and playful and fun-loving and adventurous, always wanting to go on trips and try new things when he isn't training. but on the other hand mango is a total brat when he doesn't get his way. he literally sulks. sistine has never met a grown man who literally sulks. and have you seen him when he loses a tournament? he cries more over that than sistine does over everyone. he is very competitive and extremely jealous. like extremely. mango lee will fight anyone who tries to get too close to what is his. but unlike most competitive people, mango has a strong sense of fair play. he wants to win for himself because he's great and a gift from the gods and he wants to prove that to literally everyone. mango lee hates being controlled, he loves doing his own thing and if someone tries to change that, he'll explode. he's also very protective of people who are smaller and weaker than he is ( even if they can handle themselves ) and will always rush in to save someone. mango lee has a bit of a hero complex where he thinks he can help everyone.
BACKGROUND:
 
trivia:
+ always trying to flame people
+ ALWAYS TRYING TO fight graydon
PREFERRED LOVE INTEREST: graydon mars, the knight in pizza armor
PLOTLINE: I, THE #uninvitedvisitor, approached the crash because i am incredibly stupid.

status
friends > trying to let graydon know she's interested > he finally notices > lots of kisses
interactions:
the two are very close and its almost as if they've know each other their entire lives. they bring out the best in each other, and are often each other's support. gray and sistine like sneaking out to go on cute dates like stargazing after a long day. they talk about everything and nothing. they go on picnics when its warm and cuddle while watching horrible movies when its cold. they will sometimes venture to the aquarium to look at little fishies and shy sharkies. they go to planetariums and go to concerts. they play a bunch of board games which usually end in sistine saying "is it because i'm ugly?" or "you're seriously gonna make me cry!", mango flipping the board, or throwing a piece at sistine. they just do a bunch of little domestic things with the time they can spend together like shopping for household items and cooking together and dancing to taylor swift in their undies. sistine's favorite thing is when she's alone with gray and they can be gross together.

sistine is just so cute and nice and pretty and tiny and gray just has a lot of feelings for her, okay? he has a bunch of selifes of them together on his phone and shows them off to literally everyone he can. he's always bragging about her to his friends. whenever they're on dates together he stops all the old ladies and says, "we look really good together? right?". he's really into the whole couple culture and is always buying weird couple products for he and sistine to wear. gray really likes her and gets all sappy and emotional.

sistine and gray do not need to say "i love you" even though they do and they say it very often. they say it by holding each other's deepest darkest secrets. they say it by being able to order exactly what the other person wants at a restaurant. they show their love by having philosophical discussions. by linking arms and tickling each other, by listening to each other's heartbeats, by talking about their relationship and themselves and the whole universe.
love story:
sistine has spent an entire year trying to let graydon know she wants him and it take aliens falling from the sky for him to notice.
anything else:  
nah but ilysm??
replace with a photo of your l/i being cute. 206 x 160. 2nd password.
this is the end
questionswhy are u so amazin??
comments: givin you the carefree black babies you deserve
suggestions:
+ gravity by big earth little me is such a bop
+ also stronger than you by garnet from steven universe
scene requests
+ idk im ded
 

 

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lilico
#1
A MAJOR TBT TO MY PRIME
kishibe
#2
omgs c re hc