Most of us wish to have someone to be with, someone to love with and of course someone who will return the favour of having you by their side. That was Jungkook wished for, to be able to love and feel loved by someone, but he knows deep down his heart, he will never experience that. He knows that- that someone will never notice him, that someone will never reciprocate his love and will never be his.

Jungkook was gearing up for the day. It was the first day of classes; he was on his junior high. He reached for his clock on the coffee table beside his bed and checked the time. “It’s already 6:30. I need to get up.” he thought as he placed the clock back to the table and immediately got up from his bed. He went to the bathroom and takes a bath. After a couple of minutes, he goes out of his room and walk downstairs for breakfast.

As he enters the kitchen, he hears someone’s talking and there he saw his mother and his two best friends. They too engrossed talking to each other that they didn’t notice Jungkook. The younger clear his throat for them to know that he’s right there.

“Oh, you’re up! Kookie-ah! Good morning~” Taehyung beamed and gave him his famous box grin. Jungkook placed his bag on one of the chairs and sat across his two best friends. “What are the two of you doing here?” he asked as he sips on his drink. “Why? Can’t we fetch our maknae?” Jimin blurted as he smiled at the maknae.

“Oh boys, I think you need to go its quarter to seven already.” Jungkook’s mom announced as they stood up and bid their goodbyes.

***

When they arrived at the school premises, Jimin immediately bid his goodbye saying that he needs to do his assignment, leaving the two best friends. Jimin and Taehyung are on their senior high but they’re not on the same class.

“Kookie-ah! I’ll walk you to your room!” Taehyung suggested looking at the younger. Jungkook didn’t know if he wants to accept the offer because: 1.)   His heart is gonna explode any minute now 2.) He might fall deeper to the elder and 3.) He can hear the sound of his own heartbeat. If Taehyung will say it two years ago, it was normal for him but right now is a different story. He’s in love with the man standing in front of him. No scratch that he’s deeply in love with his hyung.

“Kookie? Are you okay? Let’s go!” the elder said as he reach out his hand to the younger lad. And without further ado, Jungkook accepts his hand and they walk together. The walk is torture for Jungkook, why? Because, first of all, the love of his life is holding his hand. Second, he wished that the elder will not hear his heart, that will be embarrassing and lastly, he doesn’t want to end this escapade. He wants to stop the time.

When they reached Jungkook’s classroom, the younger felt that elder loosen his grip to his hand. He feels empty. He really doesn’t want to end this moment. He wishes he could hold him like that forever. If only destiny permits but fate doesn’t want us to be together.

“Thanks for walking with me, hyung”  Jungkook smiled showing his bunny teeth. The elder ruffled his hair and bid his goodbye to the younger lad. “See you at lunch” Taehyung said as he walks out.

“Again, I walk towards you with tearful steps, when will you notice me? Is this really what they called love? Does it really hurt you? The more I get closer to you, my feelings grow bigger and it scares me day by day. You’re a precious person to me. The one person who can’t see me though I’m looking. You’re the one person who can’t hear me whenever I’m calling. Do you ever think of me? But all I can do is cry and wait for you. To you, I’m just your best friend but for me you are everything.”  Tears rolled down on the younger cheeks but he immediately wiped it and enters his classroom.

***

Two hours had pass, Jungkook gaze at the window beside him and observe the leaves of the shady oak tree, dancing with wind; it looks like they’re cuddling each other.  Can we be like that? He smiles in a thought. He peeled his gaze off the window and look to their teacher who’s been saying words that he can’t understand. For him, it feels like he’s using a foreign language although he’s not. He can’t focus at all; it feels like the time is moving slowly. Maybe, because his thought are preoccupied right now. He heard his stomach grumble as he rub his tummy. He looks at the clock against the wall when the bell suddenly rang. Finally! A smile crept in to his face as he thought that the boring class ended already.

Our professor sighs and fixed his things. “Let’s continue this tomorrow” He said and swung the door open, leaving the room. He immediately fixed his things and exited their classroom. As he was walking towards the school cafeteria, he saw two of their friends.

“Oh, maknae! You’re going to the cafeteria, right? Let’s go!” one of the lad beamed who’s always smiles bright like the sun. “Yeah, maknae! Let’s walk together.” The other guy blurted who has a pale white skin. The younger nodded as he watches his friends hold hands. He felt a pang of jealousy in his heart. He wishes that someday he and Taehyung will do that but in the back of his mind will that be able to happen?

After of couple of minutes, they arrived at the cafeteria. He scan his eyes to look for their other friends and as soon as his landed at the middle right corner, he saw Jimin waving his hands informing them where they at. They promptly walk towards them and sat on their respective seats. The two lovers are seated together across them are the three maknaes (Jin, Namjoon, Suga and J-hope on the right side and Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook at the left side).

“Kookie~ what do you want to eat? I’ll get it for you” Taehyung cooed. “How sweet! Just date already.” Jimin snickered. The two younger blushed with the sudden avowal especially Jungkook. He turned away because it’s too much for him to handle. His heart is really going to explode. Taehyung just cleared his throat “I’ll just get our food” and he left with Suga, Jimin and Namjoon trailed behind.

“Yah! Kookie~ when will you confess to him? It’s been a year now!” J-hope asked as he looked at him. “Yeah! Maknae? When?” Jin agreed. Jungkook don’t know what to answer. His mind is really confused right now. “I don’t know hyung! I’m scared!” the younger lad sighed.

“You know what, you should confess already! I think he likes you too, right? Jin.” J-hope stated as he gaze on the oldest lad. “Yeah! J-hope is right! Don’t you feel it? The way he cares for you? He obviously likes you! You should confess before it’s too late.” Jin added.

“I really don’t know hyung. But what if he didn’t?” Jungkook said as he looked at the man who stole his heart. “That’s why, you should try it!” J-hope blurted as he rolled his eyes. “Oh! They’re coming back!” Jin announced.

“So, what do we miss?” Suga asked as he sat beside his boyfriend and placed his tray on the table. “Nothing!” the three of them chorused leaving the other lads confused but they choose to shrug it off. “Okay! If you say so.” Taehyung said as he placed the tray on the table too. Jimin and Namjoon shrugged their shoulders and do the same. And with that, they ate together and wait the bell to ring.

***

It was 10 o’ clock in the evening when Jungkook decided to call it a day. He fixed his things on this study table and flopped down on his bed. He placed his arm on his forehead and stared on the ceiling. His mind and heart are not in the right state now. His hyungs statement earlier lingers in his mind.

“Should I really confess to him? Will he accepts me? Does he feel the same? But what if he doesn’t’ like me? What if rejects me and he like someone else?” that were the questions in Jungkook’s mind right now. He doesn’t know what to do.

After a few hours thinking, he finally makes up his mind. He’s going to confess to Taehyung. He needs to take the risk.  It’s now or never. “That’s right! I’m going to confess to him tomorrow.” He slowly closed his eyes and dozed off.

The next day, he got up on his bed and does his daily routine. It was Saturday so they don’t have any classes. But today is a big day for him. He is going to confess to the elder lad. He grabs his phone on the coffee table and texted the elder.

“Hyung, I have something to tell you. Do you have time right now? Meet me at the playground near the hill” he taps the send button and waits for the elder’s reply. After a few minutes, his phone suddenly beeps. He looked at the notification; his heart is beating so fast right now. He opened the message from the man of his life. “Of course, Kookie! I’m free! See you! I also have something to tell you!” Taehyung replied. Jungkook got up his things and got out of the house.

The walk towards the meeting place is torture for Jungkook. He felt that he has a million of butterfly on his stomach. He doesn’t know what to do but for him he needed to do it and he’s determined to do it. As he arrived at the playground, he sat on one of the swings and he remembers how he falls in love with the elder.

Flashback

It was the middle of February, Taehyung and Jungkook were both wandering the beauty of Han River, laughing and joking with one another. They decided to sit on one of the bench as they wait for their friends to come. It was Saturday after all so they agreed to have some bonding time.

“Oh! There’s an ice cream! I want one~ please, hyung!” Jungkook cooed as he showed his pouty face to Taehyung. Taehyung just sighed and ruffled the younger’s hair. “Okay! Be thankful that I love you!” the elder stood up and went to the ice cream stall.

That time Jungkook felt something different when the older lad said that three words to him. He didn’t know what it is. He felt that his heart beats fast and not in a normal pace. “Omo! What is this feeling?” He thought as he calmed his heart.

After a couple of minutes, he saw Taehyung walking towards him with two ice-creams on his both hands, smiling brightly. And again, he felt the same sensation he felt earlier. When the elder sat next to him, he felt that his face blushed. “Here you go’”Taehy