A/N: Note that 1,000 won are equal to around 1 dollar.

 

 

 

It's ridiculous.

Yoongi has been staring at his screen in disbelief for what feels like a minute or so, and it's ridiculous, because who had the idea of recommending him to an apparently not nineteen, but nine year old?

Speaking of youth magazines, something Yoongi has of course never spared a look at, the whole thing seems awfully fitting to be featured in one.

'How I became the one I have always wanted to be', Yoongi sees the catchline big in front of his inner eye, printed across a photo of a disgustingly bright smiling couple, and in the middle of it himself, Yoongi, with wings, bow and an arrow.

Min Suga, the online cupid. The idea is sending shivers down his spine.

 

So, yeah, we met in high school and he's still going there, I mean, for now.

 

The kid is typing and Yoongi leans back, letting out as sigh as he uses his feet pushing against the ground to spin the office chair he's sitting on. One, he counts and Jimin is still typing, two, three, four, five, and he's starting to get a little dizzy.

 

What about the payment?

 

He types quickly, ignoring the fact that the other is still busy explaining the task, because that task is simply ridiculous and how would a nine year old have the money to pay for his precious time, anyway? Better check now before wasting too much of it. Empty inbox didn't last for long. Yoongi sighs glaring at the second monitor, too lazy to count the new messages there.

Because help, I need you to delete my past turned out as help, I need you to delete all the embarrassing I have accumulated on the internet over years of puberty and phases of self-discovery.

Because Park Jimin is not in danger, he is 'in love'. Call it that if you believe in it. Yoongi won't call himself a love specialist, but he's quite sure having to turn yourself into a completely different person to impress someone you barely know is not what it should be about.

 

And he rereads the conversation,

 

I'm going to tell you everything but promise me you're not gonna laugh,

 

and

 

of course,

 

Yoongi had replied,

 

I'm not in the position to judge, I don't care much besides the fact I'm getting paid for it.

 

And he really hadn't laughed when Jimin told him, just snorted a little, because well, once again, it's ridiculous and in no relation to any work he usually does.

 

It's not even that big of a deal, actually. Jimin has a crush, some high schooler he has been liking since the first day that kid started attending his school, Jeon Jungkook his name. The problem is, however, that that Jungkook kid is apparently pretty popular around everyone (because he's 'handsome, good at everything he does, and always nice; blushing emoji, smiling emoji, heart') and Jimin is afraid to approach him.

 

I know how it goes. If he agrees to go out with me, people are going to try and make me look bad, and they are going to look me up online and find everything.

He's not going to like me then. Everyone likes him, hyung.

 

Hyung? I could be some stinky ahjussi and you wouldn't know.

 

So, I need to become really cool. All of these embarrassing things about me need to disappear, and be replaced with something... better.

 

Something better.

And Yoongi sighs, because somehow, he pities that boy. That's why you don't give your kids a computer when they're still in the age to go out and play ball. And he's about to tell Jimin just that, that he should be worrying about other things, go study something or just work up some courage to talk to that Jungkook kid either way when there's nothing to lose, when the next message comes.

 

2,500,000 Won for the job. 5,000,000 if it gets me on a date with him.

 

 

-

 

 

„It says Park Jimin, born in Busan, dancer.“ A pause, the noise of clicking and hitting commands on the keyboard, and Yoongi turns his head to look at Hoseok. „He looks... young.“

Hoseok chuckles, barely looking up from his phone, „well, he is“, before leaning back to rest against the couch. Yoongi, on the other hand, turns back to the screen.

„Fourteen years old!“ The older exclaims, surprised, leaning towards the screen with his eyes narrowed in interest, „he had this page five years ago.“

And the boy on the photos does look like a kid, short with chubby cheeks and a bright smile. A kid with dimples, with black hair and round, innocent eyes. Cute, Yoongi notes, and keeps it to himself.

Hoseok seems little impressed. „He didn't change all too much. A little taller now, and more muscular – but all in all just a kid.“

„Bonbon boy“, Yoongi mumbles to himself, continuing as Hoseok gives him a look of confusion, „It says nicknames here – huh, Chimchim? - ah, and a bunch of emojis. This page is so bright it hurts in my eyes.“

„Then why are you still looking at it?“

„What?“

„I mean, Jimin is paying you to remove it, not to memorize it.“

There is a sharp comment on the tip of Yoongi's tongue, waiting to escape through gritted teeth, but suddenly, Yoongi halts. „Wait.“

Now Hoseok does look up. „Huh?“

„You know him?“

And Hoseok laughs, running a hand through his hair to bring some messy strands in place, „Of course, how do you think that kid found you?“

Wait. What?

„Don't tell me you were the one recommending me to him.“

Hoseok shrugs. „I did.“

It doesn't take Yoongi a second to push his chair rolling towards Hoseok, stopping it right in front of the other, frown deep and eyes wide in disbelief. „Why??“

„Why what?“

„Why do this?? This is not my caliber. I have no idea about dating and how to impress people! I mean it's stupid, isn't it?“ Yoongi scoffs. „It's simple to collect his information, but what the does he mean replace it with something better? He wants me to fake him an identity to seduce some, some-“ he pauses, looking up at Hoseok with something between confusion and annoyance, „I just don't get it.“

And to his surprise, Hoseok's smile is somewhat understanding as he speaks up again – his words, however, in contrast to that. „You don't have to. It's your job, but not your business.“

Yoongi frowns. „What do you mean?“

„Just as Namjoon says all the time.. Don't get involved in this. You don't need to understand your client. You just need to do as he says.“

You just need to ignore your own inner voice. Yoongi looks at Hoseok for a long time.

 

He doesn't reply as he goes back to work.

 

 

 

His thoughts are adrift again.

They are everywhere, circling around the subject he is always keen to avoid, don't get involved.

It's the usual line, Yoongi has heard it before countless of times, in so many instances, each one different from another but in the end, it all comes to the same.

'It's making things difficult', Namjoon would say, damn Namjoon and the things he says for always making perfect sense.

 

There is something called the Airplane Rule, something Namjoon likes to refer to, something Yoongi has involuntary memorized by word now.

“Complexity increases the possibility of failure; a twin-engine airplane has twice as many engine problems as a single-engine airplane.”

Something to keep in mind; keep things simple. The less you involve, the less can go wrong. The less you do, the less you can do wrong.

The less you will hurt. And the less you will regret.

And it's the same with everything else in life, effort, thoughts, feelings. Don't get yourself attached to things. Don't involve your own feelings in business. Just don't.

The more you involve, the more can go wrong.

So, don't get involved. Don't share your identity.

 

He feels kind of ridiculous for letting Hoseok's thoughtless words get to him.

Spin once, spin twice. Yoongi watches as the room moves around him and the office chair. Spin again. 5 million won, damn. If that's not a motivation, then what is?

 

 

 

The hours go by in silence. It must be late by now, though Yoongi has lost track of time. Soft snores are the only thing reminding him of Hoseok's presence – he knows the younger hasn't been planning to stay overnight, he's going to wake him up later.

 

Because what he is looking at right now is way, way more interesting.

 

There is everything. Literally, everything. And when Yoongi has wondered at first, whether nobody has ever taught that kid – Jimin – about privacy and data protection, he is now pretty sure.

Yoongi doesn't think he has ever found out so much about a person after so little research, he feels like he could write a book about the boy. And that despite not even having gone in depth.

 

Favorite color: Rainbow!

Future wish: Become a superhero and change the world!

Things I like: You! ♥

 

Yoongi finds himself chuckling to himself. Exclaimation mark here, emoji there, the blog is at age 16 by now and it's still way too bright.

 

It's fascinating. How someone can be that careless, of course, that is fascinating. And that's the only reason Yoongi saves the data he is supposed to remove, moves it somewhere into his computer's storage before neatly starting to remove everything from the internet.

 

And that's a creepy move and Yoongi knows it. He has no special interest in that kid, Park Jimin is nothing but a stranger after all. A lively stranger, a stranger with a blog that Yoongi can only describe as childish, the posts a wide range from humorous and witty shower thoughts to positive, seemingly unrealistic ideas on the world and the people living on it, giving an insight to Jimin's view on everything. It's a naive way of seeing the world, Yoongi notes, and oddly innocent.

All in all, what he has found out about Jimin so far (and he ignores the voice reminding him that his job is not exactly to find out things, but make sure no one else does) is innocent, almost child-like.

It's not like Yoongi cares or should care a lot. He doesn't, really. It's just an idea nagging in the corner of his mind, some kind of admiration for the ability to be so careless and the assumption that Jimin wanting to get rid of this identity is a phase, and he is going to want it back.

 

Park Jimin is an unusual client. He's a kid. He's a kid, and Yoongi has no idea why he's taking jobs from one.

5 million won. Okay, the kid is rich. A rich, spoiled brat that thinks affection can be bought with money.

Eh.

Yoongi frowns as he looks at the photo on the screen. Bright smile, chubby cheeks, innocent eyes. No, he decides. That's not it.

 

I have questions. Text me as soon as you wake up.

 

Why? Because the rules, that's why. He's not gonna do this without knowing the reason.

 

„Hoseok, I-“ ding!

 

Are you planning to keep on shocking me like that??

 

Yoongi's eyes hush to the clock. 3 am. What? Bonbon boy is up??

 

Oh, sorry, hyung. I just-

 

I was watching videos and you popped out of nowhere

 

I will have to find the time where I stopped watching again TT.TT

 

.

 

Sorry, kid.

 

Yoongi frowns.

 

So, are you up to answer some questions?

 

-

 

Hm

 

Why don't we exchange numbers?

 

I mean

 

Wouldn't that be easier

 

If you want to, of course

 

I can answer your questions then

 

 

And Yoongi knows he shouldn't do that, because numbers are trackable and all, and giving your own, personal number to a client is definitely not professional. Yoongi doesn't have an extra phone for business or something, a number to give without interfering personal life with the life as a hacker.

 

But

 

Sure, why not.                          

 

 

 

 

One interesting thing about Park Jimin is his precision. The kid isn’t one to do things sloppily. Yoongi has realized, after the third time of come on, that’s only one more page of information to get rid of, no big deal, that this job is going to take him longer than expected. It’s not because Jimin’s websites are particularly sophisticated or secured, no, not at all. They are simple, colorful and, on the first look, incredibly boring.

But, still, the time Yoongi spends in front of the computer doesn’t go by hitting rows of commands on the keyboard or decoding complicated ciphers. It goes by with him scrolling and scrolling.

 

The first time his phone vibrates is right after Hoseok leaves the apartment to go to sleep in his own bed – they live in the same house, though Hoseok’s apartment is on a higher level, the fourth one – and Yoongi realizes that he has just spent twenty minutes looking through a complete stranger’s prom photos.

Wait. What?

Closing the page immediately as if being caught doing something wrong (which he is, kinda), he grabs his phone and quickly unlocks it. And there it is.

 

Client

[3:21] Hello, Suga-ssi. This is Park Jimin! You said you have questions? :)

 

Yoongi stares at the smiley face for a while, brows furrowing in confusion, the kid is really up at this hour. He’s tempted to reply something like don’t you have school tomorrow? When he remembers that the actual Park Jimin is not 17, the age Yoongi has reached on his eye cancer causing website by now, but 19, and a university student. That’s what he has gotten from Hoseok. A performing arts student, to be exact, interested in dance and acting, living on campus together with a friend whose name he forgot and visiting his parents in Busan from time to time. He also remembers his client's private life is not really his business to care about.

Creepy; Yoongi takes note to himself to not take tasks like this one anymore. It doesn’t feel healthy to know that much about a person after one day when you have never heard anything about them before in your whole life.

 

Alright. Let me know what you want your fake identity to look like. [3:25]

 

The reply comes right away.

 

[3:31] Uhh.. It sounds off when you say it like this...

[3:31] But I don’t know

[3:31] Something cool? Whatever you think of as cool, I can’t really tell.

 

Yoongi frowns. His opinion? This is troublesome. He has no idea what the kid wants.

Something cool. 

 

 

 

- -

 

 

 

“Hacking is like a game of chess”, Namjoon exclaims with his voice raised (and Yoongi ducks his head a little because people are starting to stare), “every little move has to be completely save and thoroughly thought through!”

Hoseok breaks out into laughter. “Thorog- Thouroughly throu- ah, , thought-“

“Ah, just shut up, both of you!” It's not even midnight, but 'time to celebrate'. At least that's what Hoseok had shouted as a wake-up call in the morning (3 pm), slamming the door to Yoongi's dim-lighted apartment and shaking the backrest of the office chair he was sleeping on - or, had been, -“Namjoon justcalled and told me his ing exam went well!”

 

And that's how they ended up in the corner of a bar, yelling and laughing and talking , Hoseok with a joint between dry lips, Namjoon with his fifth bottle of soju.

Yoongi with his phone.

Sober (a little high maybe, at least), a frown on his face and his eyes already hurting from having rolled them at his friends so much during the last hours.

“Yo, about Jimin”, Hoseok starts and Yoongi feels another wave of annoyance washing over him, the kid had been texting him the whole night til the morning hours, distracting him – and now that it's daytime and his mind is clear (because being a nocturnal person doesn't mean your brain works at night like everyone else's works during daytime, it just means you aren't tired during that distractible-creative phase that comes with the late hours), Yoongi doesn't quite remember how it took them from make your instructions as clear as possible to oh sure, vanilla ice cream is nice but I prefer lemon.

“What about him?”

“Did you take care of him?” Hoseok's question comes with a giggle, and Yoongi rolls his eyes in annoyance, it's not even midnight and we're already at the bad jokes?

He's about to reply when Namjoon cuts in, his cheeks red from drunkness and his eyes glistening in curiosity, “who the is Jimin and why does he need to be taken care of??”

Hoseok laughs, responding before Yoongi can even take a breath, “Hyung's new client, and a friend of Tae.”

Tae...? Yoongi tilts his head before a face vaguely pops up in his head. Oh, right. That guy. The one Hoseok brings home with him sometimes. For extra lessons, is what the younger explained once, and 'you don't have to be so nosy all the time'!

Yoongi notes, almost admiringly so, that talking about people to Hoseok always brings out something new about them.

“Not sure if being a friend of Tae is the explanation for who Jimin is or the problem he has”, Namjoon says dryly.

Hoseok just laughs. “Both, trust me.”

They laugh a little and, to Yoongi's satisfaction, change the subject, going on about how Namjoon didn't really study for the exam but it was so easy he wouldn't have needed to; and how Hoseok's dance class he teaches on weekends is making progress. It's almost relaxing then, just a little loud and a little stupid and a little tiring for someone (Yoongi) who stayed up all night working (stalking).

 

Then bzzz. bzzz.

Yoongi jumps when the phone vibrates in his pocket.

 

Client

[11:48] martial arts are pretty cool, aren't they?

 

He snorts at the message and regrets it when two curious faces turn to him, heads tilted in almost the same angle, “who's that?”

Yoongi just rolls his eyes before turning them back to the screen. “None of your business.”

It's not like he's embarassed. There is nothing he has to hide, is there? He's texting a client, for business and business only. No further motives.

But Hoseok is not satisfied, a grin playing the curve of his lips, almost sadistically so, “Yoongi is texting someone? Hah, don't tell me you got yourself a friend??”

And Namjoon bursts out into laughter, what the is so funny now, the former joins in immediately.

“It's Jimin, to be clear.” Yoongi has no idea why he's saying that now. It being true is not the reason, certainly not.

The look Hoseok gives him is expressionless for a second before it turns into surprise. “Jimin? Why?”

Good question. “Um.” He coughs. “Because. He's cute.”

And out of all things he could have said, this was definitely the wrong answer.

Because Hoseok almost jumps, his eyes widening in an expression between amazement and horror, “Min Yoongi thinks of someone as cute??”

 

Yoongi narrows his eyes, annoyance slowly turning into anger, because he's a patient person but “what the , Hoseok, what am I, a rock?”

“That's not what I meant!”

“What's the problem then?”

Hoseok takes a breath to reply, but Namjoon beats him to it. “, we're talking 'bout a client. That's a no-no.”

A what? Sure, they have talked about this subject before, countless of times, and Namjoon is kind of right most of the time; but as far as Yoongi remembers, what he does and what not is still his business to decide.

„Also as far as I know he is already having a cru-“

“It's my own ing decision how I ing work and treat my ing clients!!”

He gets up.

Namjoon turns quiet. Hoseok coughs.

Yoongi takes a deep breath. There he is, exculpating himself to his friends on why it's completely fine to flirt with Jimin (which, for the record, he is not, and this is all as a matter of principle, nothing more or less). A moment of silence passes by before he sits back down.

Another pause, and Hoseok smiles. “Sure it is.”

Namjoon looks at him for a while then. He shrugs. “Next subject.”

 

bzzz.  b zzz.

 

Client

[12:01] OMG HYUNG MAKE ME A GANG MEMBER!!!

 

Busy. Later. [12:02]

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

I'm back at work. [5:02]

[5:10] Suga hyung! How was your day? ^.^

 ... [5:11]

Jimin, just what gives you clues on assuming my age I could be like 50 [5:11]

[5:12] Oh, good question!

[5:12] Guess you just seem like a cool hyung to me ^.^

 

-

 

[5:30] Hyung?

 Busy. [5:32]

[5:45] [picture message]

 ? [5:53]

[5:55] My roommate, Taehyung. Doesn't he look cute in his sleep? kkk

oh so that's him [5:56]

[5:56] What do you mean? You know Tae???

 

Oh . .

 

I know everyone, kid. [5:56]

[5:57] Haha, do you?

[5:57] Can you make my identity cool like you? Kkkkkkkk

 

That was a close call.

 

-

 

Want to keep the account on that website for aspiring singers and producers? [6:10]

[6:13] Huh? Why would I?

Well your uploads there are pretty good [6:13]

Just asking [6: 32]

[6:33] do you like my singing, hyung??

 

-

 

  the kid's part of your dance crew? [7:43]

 

-

 

bzzz. bzzz.

 

-

 

Hoseok

[9:15] You are so gonna regret staying up this late when I wake you up for university in... wait...

[9: 16] twenty minutes. Idiot.

[9:17] btw yes he is.

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

„Alright, here we go.“ Hoseok looks up from his noodle box, eyes glistening in excitement and stains of peanut sauce on his chin. „What have you got?“Curiosity leaks through his eager expression.

Yoongi on the other hand barely moves.

He yawns, his head resting on the table upon the crook of his elbow, „didn't make a list.“ It's 4 in the afternoon, not his liveliest time.

„There must be quite a lot about Jiminnie on the web when you're still not done getting rid of it after two days!“

And Yoongi just nods, sure, there's just a lot, it's not like I actually read the and definitely not like I save it on a backup HDD before deleting it from the servers, like, that would be beyond creepy, wouldn't it?

He could slap himself.

 

And the thing with Jimin is not like love on the first sight or something, certainly not. He hasn't even talked to the boy, that'd just be absurd. (Text messages don't count, even if they're about sleeping habits or ice cream flavors.)

Yoongi is not the type for love on the first sight. It's cheesy, it's dumb, and damn, it's not even realistic; to be honest. You can't fall in love with someone through some pictures, videos, and a bunch of textposts.

It's true that Jimin's cute, but that's not the point, maybe the point is that he doesn't like himself. Maybe it's that Jimin wants to get rid of his identity.

While all Yoongi does in his life is trying to maintain his own.

 

Maybe it's some kind of empathy, understanding what it feels like to struggle with being yourself or not understanding why you would want to be someone else other than that. Yoongi hates it when people tell him who to be or how to act. Jimin, on the other hand, does those things to himself. He shows to everyone this happy facade, and it may not be false, but also it's not the whole truth. It's odd, isn't it? Stupid, isn't it?

And so is love on the first sight. (Which Yoongi is not experiencing, mind you, of course not.)

 

„I don't like the job.“

Hoseok gives him a blank look. „It's worth 5 million, hyung. You don't have to like it!“

And Yoongi shrugs before closing his eyes again. He's too tired to argue. „Guess so.“

 

 

 

 

It's at 9 pm, Yoongi is watching a video of Jimin trying to fit a bunch of marshmallows in his mouth (giggles, puffed cheeks, eyesmile so strong you can barely see his eyes but honestly it's ing adorable), that Hoseok texts him a simple ‘wanna meet him?’

 

And before Yoongi can even be surprised, let alone reply, a picture message follows up, two boys sitting on the shabby black couch Hoseok has up in his apartment with a bowl of chips in their middle. One of them is looking at the camera, lightish brown hair and a wide grin on his face – Taehyung, Yoongi recognizes, he figured by now that Jimin has the habit of post ing photos of his friends a lot and he more or less automatically memorized most of their names – the other, though, is hiding his face with both hands. There is a black beanie on his head; but strands of red hair peeking out from under neath it, and his fingers are short and somewhat adorable and Yoongi calls himself a creep for smiling to himself.

Jimin is here.

 

You are so dead if you told them anything about my identity. [9:03]

 

He snorts as he types that. He's joking , Hoseok might act dumb sometimes but he knows himself that Yoongi – Suga – can't afford having anyone know about his double-facedy .

The hacker is already living a pretty dangerous life, in an ordinary apartment building easily accessible for anyone willing to get in (though he knows how to erase his own traces as he works, and isn't the safest place for a criminal the crowd, as nobody is gonna expect him there?), Hoseok wouldn't be that careless.

 

[9:03] So, you coming?

 

And Yoongi has to admit to himself that the thought of going up there to meet Jimin is tempting. It excites him somehow , not in the way you would be excited before going on a date or meeting a famous celebrity, no, it's more of... curiosity . There is so much he has learned about Jimin during days (nights) of work, and now Yoongi is curious. Simply curious.

And it's a good thing to know your clients when you are supposed to work on their identity, right? Right.

What he replies, however, is the complete opposite of those thoughts.

 

Nope. Entertain them yourself, I'm busy. [9:06]

 

Yoongi stares at the words for a while, as if not understanding himself why he sent them. It's a bit of everything, trying to prove Hoseok he is more of a professional than his friend thinks, wanting to be careful not to mix his real life with the life as a hacker, awareness that wanting to meet a random stranger this badly is kind of wrong and not something Yoongi should let himself get carried away with.

 

Hoseok doesn't reply, not after five minutes and not after ten, and eventually Yoongi stops waiting and goes back to work.

Work, a.k.a today, Taehyung went out on a date and came back with a stray kitten.

 

Yoongi 's halfway through the story,

… we decided to name it Nougat and keep it in the dorm room, but when Jin hyung came over he insisted that we had to bring it back to where we got it from--

that he hears someone knock at the door.

Alarmed, Yoongi's eyes narrow darting towards the source of the sound . W ho on earth would come visit him?

Thinking about it, there are only two people coming to mind , either Hoseok (who never knocks