"I have to go." 

Jonghyun stared sadly towards Juniel, who was folding Jonghyun's clothes and put them into a bag. Juniel fingers paused, then continued her work, this time her fingers trembled. 

"Looking for that woman?" Jonghyun sighed. 

"I'm sorry, Juniel." 

"No. How could I forgive you? You're going to leave me to look for another woman, a woman you've never even met but in your dreams." Juniel's voice broken by sobs. 

"These dreams are real Juniel, and that woman also, this heart is beating for her." Juniel wiped tears from her eyes and looked at Jonghyun with sadly. 

"Don't you love me, oppa? Don't you remember the time we first met? I've always loved you, ever since we were kids. I'm always there for you, even at your hard times, I stay with you and believe that there's still a future for us. And you have the heart to throw it all?"

Juniel's sobbing voice couldn't hold back her feelings anymore. It made Jonghyun frowned, trying to suppress his guilt. This woman in front him was a perfect partner, a woman who sincerely love him so much and always be with him when he was sick. Of course Jonghyun felt tremendous guilt for dumping her like this, it’s not like he wanted to do this but the problem came from his heart... this heart didn’t want Juniel, and it’s calling another woman, that woman, who always appeared in his dream.

"I don’t know what to say. I couldn’t say anything but sorry." Jonghyun squeezing his hair in frustration.

"Oppa, tell me you love me..." Juniel said with pleading and tearful eyes. Jonghyun kneww at least that sentence would make Juniel calm, but he couldn’t say it, those words couldn’t come out from his thin lips. Juniel knew it, her eyes was closed trying to endure the pain that filled her chest. She never thought she and Jonghyun would end like this.

"Every night, when I intertwined my hands in this room, I always prayed to God to give you a new heart, so you can be healthy, so that we have a future together, so that we could get old together, and live with children we would have happily. I was so happy when you get a heart donor heart. I was so happy... but it turns out I was wrong." Juniel closed Jonghyun’s bag on the bed and stepped back, looked at Jonghyun could only freeze on his spot.

"If only I knew that this heart would take you away from me, you'd better never get any heart donor." And with her words filled with pain, Juniel walked away, crying.

When the night began to dim and the evening went into dark, Jonghyun sat facing his mother and told her everything. His mother just looked at him sadly. "So that's it? You left Juniel just like that?" Jonghyun sighed sadly.

"I know everyone will blame me for my evil treatment to Juniel. But I hope you can understand me mom. I... this heart... this heart wants someone else."

"How could Jonghyun? What do you feel now, it can’t be explained by logic, I’m confused with your attitude. I’m sad to see Juniel, Jonghyun. She was very disappointed, she was devastated, and not only that, your father and my friendship with both of Juniel’s parents was damage because of this problem, they don’t understand." His mother sighed sadly.

"But I believe you, son, I had been through moments where I almost lost you, many times, and if you say that heart loves another woman, I will try to support you, because if what you say is true, I’m indebted to her. The woman who donated her lover’s heart for you." Jonghyun hugged his mother tightly. Trying to suppress his tears who had been trying to burst out, everyone may hate him, but as long as his mother on his side, Jonghyun could move forward.

"Thank you mom." Jonghyun's voice was hoarse with emotion, embraced his mother, the old lady who was so tough to fight for her only son who was sick. Jonghyun was very fond of his mother.

"So, where are you going to look for her?"

"Seoul, I've signed up to take my magister there."

The first time Jonghyun saw Seolhyun was when she came out of a convenience store and stepped onto the sidewalk. At that time the clouds were darken, sending a message that it would drop its contains to Earth. Jonghyun had completed all his business to stay in Seoul, the administration in his campus and he had found a place to stay, a tiny apartment. After that, he browsed Minhyuk’s home address, seeking information as much as possible from the neighbors. He's getting enough important information that Minhyuk died the day before his wedding with Seolhyun. 

What kind of sadness did Seolhyun had when it happen? Jonghyun didn’t dare to imagine. It took two days until Jonghyun found Seolhyun campus address. By one of her college friends, he was told that Seolhyun was looking for textile material for their class activities in one of the traditional markets in Seoul. Jonghyun decided to park his car and walk exploring the region. It nearly took two hours for him to went through the streets of that area, he felt he had walked so far until he found that figure. Jonghyun only ever seen Seolhyun in a photograph in search results on the internet, but he believed that women who walked hastily across him was Seolhyun.

He knew. His heart knew. His heart pounding, calling for her. At first he was trying to get encouragement to approached and introduced himself to Seolhyun, but when he took one running step he stopped. What would he say to  Seolhyun? Is he going to come and casually said, "I’m Jonghyun, I was the sick guy who lucky to get a heart donor from your fiancee, Minhyuk." Or maybe he would say: "Hi I’m Jonghyun, you might think I'm strange, but I love you. Your fiancee’s heart, Minhyuk, is still pounding for you. And his heart is inside my chest now." His heart beat was getting and stronger and Jonghyun smiled, patted his chest slowly.

"Hey, I know you can’t wait to meet your princess. But we can’t run to her and do everything without planning it first. I hope you’ll be patient."

Then Jonghyun chuckled to himself, he was really like a crazy person, talking to himself with his heart while standing on the sidewalk like this. The rain began to fall and wet his head. Jonghyun threw his view to Seolhyun, she looked up confusedly when the rain also started to fall on her, then she entered the café.

An old café as UNION on the board name. Meanwhile Jonghyun stood there, no one knew how long he was there, even himself, he stood like an idiot, confused what to do. Continued to think and the drops of rain began to wet his hair and flowing down to his shoulders, soaking his clothes. Then he swallowed, crossed the street and stepped into the café. Hesitant for a moment as he was standing in front of the door and stepped inside.

Seolhyun was sitting in the corner and his eyes stole a glance on her. Just as Seolhyun raised her head and looked back at him, Jonghyun nervously looked away, trying to act indifferent then choose a place in another corner ordered a coffee and sat confusedly thinking about how he could approach Seolhyun. And apparently he took too long time to think, for a moment after the rain was falling lightly, Seolhyun stood up and left the café, and Jonghyun felt his heart that was pounding excitedly, now felt empty.

Since then Jonghyun always came at the same time, choose the same seat, staring anxiously toward the door faithfuly. Till one day he came late, somehow God made Seolhyun came to that place once again and left her book there. Then because of that book, he had an excuse to get acquaintance with Seolhyun. Even when Seolhyun didn’t come back to the café as promised, Jonghyun still wait for her. And turned out his waiting was not useless, Seolhyun finally came to see him.

They continued to meet and got closer, but then the meetings were filled by Seolhyun with stories of memories about Minhyuk, making Jonghyun felt something burning in his chest. A feeling that can be described as: jealousy. Yes. Jonghyun was jealous. Very jealous of Minhyuk. He was a perfect man in Seolhyun’s eye, but Jonghyun loved Seolhyun. His love couldn’t be described with logic, couldn’t be analyzed with words. His feeling of love was just there, fulfilling his chest cavity, invaded his heart. While the one Seolhyun loved was Minhyuk, always Minhyuk. And foolishly Jonghyun sparked the quarrel, made Seolhyun farther away from him.

He sipped his coffee sadly. He was still sitting here, at the same corner, the same place, the same time, waiting faithfully as he always did. But this time she didn’t come and Jonghyun was doubt whether Seolhyun will come this time. If Seolhyun didn’t want to come, he would be devastated by a broken heart. Jonghyun felt his heart creaked cause of pain in his chest cavity.

Seolhyun stepped hesitantly in front of the café, the café was still the same. Seolhyun sighed. Why was she here? Did it mean she give opportunity for Jonghyun to distract her from Minhyuk? But Hyejung said, with opening her heart for Jonghyun didn’t mean she threw Minhyuk away, Minhyuk would always be there and would always be alive in her heart. But hate it or not, she had to admit it that she also loved Jonghyun. The feeling grew sometime. Maybe since Jonghyun introduced himself, perhaps since the regular meetings of them in the café from time to time. Seolhyun didn’t know that for sure but now she wanted to find an answer. Looking for answers to all the questions that clung to her.

Seolhyun then walked into the café and found Jonghyun sat there, on the same corner where they usually sit together. He looked thoughtful, not looking towards the door, but then somehow he instantly realized Seolhyun’s arrival. His head was upright and he half rose when he saw Seolhyun.

"Seolhyun-ah..." Seolhyun stepped closer towards hikm, standing doubtfully.

"I... I want to apologize for yelled at you on our meeting last time." Jonghyun smiled and sat back.

"Sit down, Seolhyun, I'll order your favorite food."

Coffee and toast ware served, their usual menu during their meeting there. Jonghyun stared Seolhyun with a sincere smile. "I'm sorry, I forced you too much. Believe me Seolhyun, from now on I will not push you again. I will always be there, whether as a friend, either as your brother. I will always be there for you." Seolhyun bowed her head, then looked at Jonghyun with a sad smile.

"Thank you Jonghyun... I... I can’t promise you anything, but you were so good to me."

"Because I love you." Jonghyun's voice was so serious. It's okay if Seolhyun couldn’t love him back. It was enough for him to sit here and stare at her and breathe the same air with her.  

Jonghyun just got home and laid down on the bed, his eyes staring vacantly on the ceiling, imagining Seolhyun. Just imagine her, her smile, her laught and her way of talking, could make him smile, filled with feelings of love. Then his cell phone rang, once, twice. Jonghyun finally picked it up. The name on the phone screen made him stiffened.

"Yes Juniel?"

Since the breakup at the hospital, Juniel never kept in touch with him. At all. And Jonghyun understood, because he didn’t deserve to beg forgiveness from Juniel. And if Juniel stayed under these conditions, Jonghyun understood, because if Juniel hated him she would easily open her heart to others. The voice on the other side was full of sob.

"Oppa... oppa.. I really need you... I can’t be strong without you..." Juniel kept sobbing on the other side, filled with pain without mercy, making Jonghyun’s heart ache.

"Come back oppa... I beg you please come back here..."

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Sorry just update now, my life schedule is so hectic and now i live somewhere with a bad internet connection T_T it's really hard to update! I hope you guys could be patient, I will make sure to update when i get internet ^^ thank you~

don't forget to comment + vote. thank you ^^