Chapter 9
Fix YouShe sat silently in the backseat of the car just like how she usually is, but instead of looking out the window, her eyes looked down at her hands that were resting on her lap. She felt like she needed to sleep when she consistently yawned, but she won't because she knows that she will not be able to fall asleep, just like the night before.
From the corner of her eye, she saw that they passed by a store, which made her look out the window. They passed by it, but there was no need for the car to turn back around because there will be a few more nearby. When she spotted another shop that was similar to it, she finally spoke. "Please stop the car"
In the car, she remembered Rebecca Bloomwood's quote from Confessions of a Shopaholic;
"When I shop, the world gets better."
That's what she did a few minutes ago; she shopped, but she is definitely not feeling better, nor did the world get better. She still feels the same, only this time, it felt heavier. It started drizzling outside, which made her eyes looked out the window. She took a deep breath and hoped that it will stop soon and for the rain to not get any harder. She removed her black pumps and changed into her black flats when she saw that they were getting closer.
The car has finally come to a full stop when it arrived to its destination. The drizzling stopped, but it looks like that part wasn't affected since the ground was really dry. It was cloudy and a bit dark, but at least there was no drizzle and no rain. Jessica placed her phone in the pocket of her blazer and got the tiny umbrella and hanged it on her wrist before getting stuff out from the car. She told the driver that she'll give him a ring when she needs to be fetched.
She refused the driver's help when he offered to help her carry her stuff and proceeded to a familiar spot with those stuff in her hands. Jessica heard the car speed off, finally leaving her to be alone. She was walking in that confusing place with familiarity. She didn't need to ask people to guide her to the place that she was heading for because she knows exactly where it is.
Jessica finally stopped walking and flashed a smile that was faker and sadder than ever. She bent her knees to place the basket of flowers in her hands above each grave. "One for dad, one for mom, and of course, one for my baby sister." She took a deep breath before swallowing the lump that already formed in . "How are you three?" Jessica bit the inside of her lower lip, trying to stop herself from crying. "D-do you guys k-know th-that I-" she let her tears fall out this time. "I miss you?"
Her handkerchief was laid out on the ground for her to sit on. Her mother's grave is placed between her father's and sister's graves, so that's where she got herself comfortable; in the middle. Her family was buried in Korea and not in their hometown of San Francisco because no one would visit them there since Jessica will live with her grandparents in Seoul. "It's been 13 years. Almost a decade and a half, right?" She was talking in her mother tongue and kept looking at the three graves in front of her. "I went here alone because halmeoni and harabeoji are in Busan. It was my birthday gift to grandpa for him and granny to on a trip. I hope you guys won't hate me for it."
Jessica's voice was cracking the entire time. Aside from the deafening silence, only the sound of her own breathing and own voice were heard. She sat there in front of her family that was sleeping peacefully because of an accident
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