Title: How To Date The Man of Your Dreams: Sangnamja Style

Song: Bad Enough for You- All Time Low

Genre: Comedy(?), Romance, Fluff

"Seriously, Namjoon, you've been drooling at him for like, ten minutes now."

"Shut up! It hasn't even been ten minutes!"

"Oh so you have been drooling!" Yoongi cackles.

Namjoon resorts to a loud snort-grunt that catches almost everyone's attention. Everyone except for his darling Kim Seokjin who has lovely pink earbuds plugged into his ears humming very beautifully to the tune of whatever's coming out of those cute pink earbuds.

Namjoon’s just really biased.

"I bet you ten dollars Namjoon wouldn't even have the balls to ask for his number."

Yoongi said while stretching an arm around his boyfriend, Jimin, who was hunched down working on his business paper. It catches Jimin off guard but Yoongi only offers him a small smile and Jimin proceeds to leave a quick peck on the older's lips.

Namjoon retches.

Jungkook, who was sleeping previously and had his slumber interrupted by Namjoon's incompetence for acquiring a certain guy's number, butts in and gives his two cents.

"Make it twenty dollars. Namjoon hyung wouldn't even have the guts to talk to him without even stuttering."

"Hey!"

"Just saying." Jungkook shrugs. "I mean, you're like a little turtle with a penchant for dancing like a lizard with seizures and Seokjin hyung is an awkward turtle who dances like he's directing traffic."

"It’s called crumping!"

"I call it electrocution." Jimin says without lifting his head from where he's currently struggling finishing his paper.

"I second it." Yoongi says with a lazy smile.

Namjoon, not taking any more of these insults, bangs the table and stands up greatly and mightily among his so-called friends.

The librarian shushes him and Namjoon looks like a puppy with his tail between his legs. His friends start cackling and he regains his confidence wanting to prove them wrong.

He's gonna approach Seokjin and talk to him and get his number and they'll be closer to each other and they'll date and get married and they'll adopt two babies, a boy and a girl, name them not after his friends cause they are annoying as hell and they will live happily ever after. The end.

Namjoon puts his game face on and he mentally readies himself for the oncoming battle. He’s gonna do this. He’ll talk to Seokjin. And he'll get the older's number and they will date and- wait I already did this.

Okay. Here goes nothing.

He speed walks towards the opposite side of the room where Seokjin is.

Right then, Hoseok and Taehyung enter the library as Namjoon walks like a constipated old man towards where they assume Seokjin is sitting at.

"Is he finally going to ask for Seokjin hyung's number?" Hoseok asks.

"Yeah." Jungkook replies. "About damn time."

"Well, you go girl." Taehyung says nonchalantly while pulling Hoseok down to sit next to him.

-

Seokjin is reading a cute manhwa when suddenly the lights become dim. He lifts his head and sees Namjoon standing next to his table looking like he's trying to psych himself out.

"Hey Namjoon."

This seems to make Namjoon snap out of his concentration and looks at him coolly.

"Sup." Namjoon automatically assumes a cold facade and tries his very best to be the swaggy Rap Monster that he is.

From his friends' table, Namjoon looks like a big douche with his arm casually dangling from the side of the chair while he lounges weirdly like a snake and tilts his head a bit too much to the side.

Jimin giggle-snorts.

Seokjin, on the other hand, seems so entranced by the bad boy aura Namjoon is emitting and oh his god his long time crush Kim Namjoon is finally noticing him! Seokjin and his cute pink aura with his pink everything and Seokjin could not contain his feels. He tries to maintain an aloof composure to suppress his feels.

"Um, do you need anything, Namjoon-ah?" Seokjin blushes.

Namjoon almost splutters because Seokjin just called him Namjoon-ah which means he's important to Seokjin and pink really suits Seokjin and his face. And Namjoon really likes his face.

"Yeah, uh, can I, like, get your number? Since we're friends and stuff. Yo. Yeah. Uh-huh." Namjoon says in a deep voice to make him so believable.

As if.

From the other table, Taehyung and Jimin are restraining their boyfriends from barging into Seokjin and Namjoon's conversation because of the awkwardness and if no one stops the two of them Yoongi and Hoseok will.

Jungkook just sits there and wills himself not to vomit everything he has eaten for the past 18 years of his life.

Then they saw the most unheard of thing in all of their lives.

Seokjin giggles.

Kim Seokjin giggled and took out his phone to let Namjoon type his number in. All the while blushing and looking like a baby bunny wanting the big bad wolf to take care of him.

The world had just gone ing insane, people.

Namjoon walks back to their table and sits very swag-like, almost reaching Yoongi's swag, and grins smugly. Yoongi could feel his own swag being in by Namjoon’s smugness.

"And that kids, is how you get a phone number." Namjoon says as he pops up his