Chapter 1

Remembrance

Smothering his face, Do Kyungsoo hides deeper in the feathery folds of his satin pillow as he attempts to muffle the pandemonium on the opposite side of the decrepit walls of his low-rate apartment.

After restlessly tossing and turning for thirty minutes, Kyungsoo admits defeat and unsteadily wobbles over to his cramped bathroom. With eyes half open, he fumbles around blindly for his toothbrush and he sluggishly manages to take care of his hygienic needs. Feeling more attentive, more himself, Kyungsoo makes his way to his living area and tries to recollect his thoughts. For the first time all summer he has a short break from his classes, and Kyungsoo has no clue whatsoever as to how to best make use of the spare time. Slumping onto his couch, Kyungsoo tosses his head back as he reminisces about his past two years at Seoul National University.

If it were just five months ago, Kyungsoo would have been coerced again by Minseok and Luhan into playing an unfair game of soccer with them. The match would have concluded with Kyungsoo procuring several scrapes, and Minseok and Luhan sharing sweaty, victory kisses. Or maybe Kyungsoo would have spent the day with Kris and Joonmyun, conversing about their deepest desires and passing on advice as they drank scalding coffee while walking in the crisp autumn air underneath the chromatic cover of the trees. Kris would have shrewdly taken Joonmyun’s petite hand, causing the the younger’s face to flush red. As usual, Kyungsoo would have taken that as his cue, and he would have returned back to his apartment, alone.

Kyungsoo really did miss his friends, but he just couldn’t help feeling like a third wheel whenever he was with them. Although, Kyungsoo didn’t mind the rare chances when he could have his shared apartment to himself. Whether it was pure pleasure or just his plain nature, Kyungsoo cherished those moments of solitude, and he found himself rather looking forward to them.

Now, however, Kyungsoo’s friends have graduated and moved on, voiding the apartment of life and vibrancy. Glancing around his flat, Kyungsoo realizes for the first time just how lifeless it looks. He longs for Luhan’s disarray of clothing sprawled across the floor, Minseok’s prized, autographed jerseys hanging on display over every square inch of the walls, Kris’s artwork projects strewn over the dining table, and Joonmyun’s constant nagging for everyone to clean up their lodging.

Kyungsoo’s retrospection is interrupted by the knotting of his stomach, reminding him to pull himself out of his slump and to get on with his day. Clutching his abdomen, he scours his lamentable stock of groceries for something edible, but, to his dismay, he finds nothing but empty cardboard boxes and expired goods.

Groaning, Kyungsoo snatches his jacket from its perch atop his sofa , and he hastily stuffs his feet into his battered sneakers, haphazardly tying his laces. Kyungsoo reaches out to open his front door, but he hesitates, bracing himself for the commotion that awaits him. Tightening his grip on the doorknob, he twists his wrist and pushes out, immediately met with resistance from the adverse side. Forcing his whole body on the door, Kyungsoo valiantly manages to shove his way out of his apartment without having been flattened against the wall.  

Incoming students, trailed by their emotional family members, walk hurriedly past Kyungsoo, struggling to carry boxes upon boxes of belongings to their new rooms. Kyungsoo’s whole hallway is an amalgamation of bursts of laughter, weeping mothers, and overexcited teenagers.

All these lively people surrounding Kyungsoo are way too animated for his liking and Kyungsoo begins to feel the onset of claustrophobia. Taking shaky breaths, he weaves his way through the bustling crowd, eager to reach the fresh, open air.

Stumbling onto the pavement outside, Kyungsoo inhales the refreshingly cool September breeze and he welcomes the instant rejuvenation. He makes his way down the habitual street, stopping to admire storefronts and saying hi to familiar faces. As Kyungsoo strolls - with his hands in his pockets - he wonders just how many times he has made the same trek down these exact, worn pathways. Lost in thought, Kyungsoo arrives at the supermarket as he has done on countless other occasions.

Once in the grocery store, Kyungsoo brushes his fingers over the many rows of canned goods, taking his own sweet time to pick out the items that notably appealed to him. Unlike its usual assiduous bustle, the shop seems rather desolate, and Kyungsoo leisurely strolls down each aisle, met at each turn with yet another lane devoid of human presence.

It is almost like the calm before the storm. Pretty soon, the methodically stocked shelves and immaculate displays will be tarnished by the ravenous hands of the incoming freshmen class in their vehemence to make good use of their first allowances.

One by One, Kyungsoo’s shopping cart slowly fills as he quietly draws items from their ledges. Whether he has a necessity for an object or not, Kyungsoo makes it a point to examine every aisle, trying to prolong his errand in order to evade the uproar back at his apartment.

The rumbling of his stomach, however, brings Kyungsoo back to attention as he remembers his original goal. Dragging his overflowing cart to the checkout counter, Kyungsoo pays for his goods and prepares himself to lug his grocery bags over the  half-mile long trek back to his apartment.

Not nearly as many families are milling about outside as there had been when Kyungsoo had departed for his errand. He checks his watch and notices that it is just half past noon, so everyone has probably settled down already and families are most likely eating lunch, which explains the lack of riffraff on the streets. Even his apartment corridors are back to their usual eery, quietness, and Kyungsoo more than welcomes the familiar peacefulness.

Balancing his various bags on one arm, Kyungsoo cautiously reaches for his keys, successfully able to unlock his door. Getting inside, however, well, that’s another struggle. The bags in Kyungsoo’s arm totter precariously in his grip as he attempts to prop open his door with his right shoulder. Nudging his shoulder further, Kyungsoo is surprised to find that the weight of the door has greatly diminished. Hm, I must be getting stronger from hauling around those textbooks, he thinks to himself. To his dismay though, Kyungsoo looks up to find that there is a boy holding the door open for him.

For what seems like way longer than comfortable, Kyungsoo stares up into the pair of dark, chocolate brown eyes, which are almost masked by the boy’s shaggy, bronzed hair. Briefly letting his gaze venture further, Kyungsoo takes in the contrast of the boy’s pursed, rose lips against his golden skin. At a loss for words, Kyungsoo manages to stumble back a few steps, causing the door to slip out of the stranger’s grasp. For a short moment, Kyungsoo’s view of the boy is obstructed, but he manages to catch a glimpse of the male’s slender frame retreating down the hallway before his door swings shut, leaving Kyungsoo breathless and clutching on to his shopping bags for dear life.

What the hell, he thinks to himself as he sets his bags on his kitchen counter. Nice going Kyungsoo. Not only are you pathetic enough that you can’t open your own goddamn door, but you also managed to singlehandedly act like a doofus over such a trivial matter; you didn’t even thank the boy, for crying out loud.

Irked and slightly embarrassed at his lack of manners from the previous incident, Kyungsoo channels his frustrations into his grocery items, vigorously sorting them out into their respective cupboards.

“Whoa, it looks like you really have a grudge against that loaf of bread.”

The sound of the unfamiliar voice causes Kyungsoo to drop the bread in his hands. He looks up to see a lanky boy with shadowy black hair and fine-cut features sheepishly looking back at him.

“W-who are you? And, how did you get in here?” Kyungsoo finally manages to mumble.

“Sorry about intruding, but your door was left ajar. I knocked, but you never replied.” the stranger answers, his subtle lisp becoming apparent.

“Is there something I can help you with, then?” Kyungsoo asks, surprisingly relieved for the disruption of his exasperation.

“Actually, yes! I was wondering if you had a spare toothbrush. I seem to have left mine at home, and I’m really not in the mood to walk all the way to the general store for a stupid toothbrush.” came the reply.

“You’re in luck,” Kyungsoo detaches a toothbrush from his newly bought pack and hands it over to the looming boy.

“Thanks so much!” the boy replies as he clamps a firm hand down on Kyungsoo’s shoulder before pivoting on his heels to exit the flat. Hesitating by the doorway, the stranger turns around to say cheerfully, “I’m Oh Sehun, by the way, and I’m your new neighbor.”

“Do Kyungsoo. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Kyungsoo responds, warming up to Sehun’s presence.

“Well, it looks like you’ve got some bread to tackle with, so I’ll leave you to yourself...for now. You’ll be seeing me around quite often, so I wouldn’t get used to the quiet if I were you.” Sehun is about to shut the door when he peeks his head in again and adds with a cheeky wink, “Oh, and take it easy on the bread for me, will you? It’s done nothing wrong to you.”

Shaking his head in amusement, Kyungsoo resumes sorting the groceries out, his demeanor lightening up tremendously by Sehun’s unexpected drop by. After making himself a hefty marinara chicken sandwich, Kyungsoo settles down on his lumpy couch and switches on his television, planning on catching up on the dramas he missed over his summer semester.

The weight of the food in his stomach numbs Kyungsoo’s senses, and he doesn’t realize that he has dozed off until he is abruptly awoken from his placid slumber by the deafening screeching of his alarm clock in his bedroom.

Jerking awake, Kyungsoo pulls himself upright, his plate from his previous meal clattering to the ground, adding to the clamor. Kyungsoo quickly falls back into his usual morning cycle, and, fifteen short minutes later, he is walking out of the door with a bagel in hand and a tattered backpack slung carelessly over his shoulder.

“Ya, wait up!” shouts an all too familiar voice from behind Kyungsoo.

Not looking back, Kyungsoo slackens his pace a little. The person falls into step with Kyungsoo, and he doesn’t have to look over to know who it is. Just from their terse encounter yesterday, Kyungsoo knows that it’s Sehun. No one else has such springy bounce in their step as he does. The two of them walk in silence towards the bus stop, neither one wanting to be the first to cave in and start chatting.

Kyungsoo can practically feel the tension building up in Sehun. He can tell that Sehun is using a lot of willpower to keep himself from bursting out in conversation. Sehun’s frustration amuses Kyungsoo and he feels laughter rise in his throat.

Unable to hold back his giggles, Kyungsoo breaks first, “Excited to start school are we?” he asks, smiling and shaking his head playfully.

“I’m slightly excited and slightly nervous,” the taller boy responds, letting his breath out with a deep sigh.

“Eh, you’ll get used to this whole ordeal before you even know it. What are you majoring in anyways?” asks Kyungsoo.

“I haven’t declared my major yet, but I am taking some courses at the school of arts at SNU!”

“Well, lucky you because that’s where I’m headed as well.” Kyungsoo grins up at the taller boy as they both step onto the bus and manage to find seats towards the rear of the vehicle.

Sehun speaks incessantly from the moment the bus lurches from the bus stop and comes to a halt thirty minutes later at the campus. Under normal circumstances, Kyungsoo would have zoned out and gotten irritated with the never-ending, one sided chatter, but, with Sehun, it’s different. He feels more fascinated than irked, and Kyungsoo can’t help but be entertained by Sehun’s excitement and high spirits.

“Whoa, the campus is so huge. I’m so totally going to get lost.” Sehun says as he takes in every inch of the area in awe.

“Don’t worry, the school of arts is pretty tiny. Plus, with me as your guide, you’ll never get lost.” Kyungsoo gives Sehun’s hand a reassuring squeeze before gently tugging him along towards their destination.

“Hyung, will you really be my guide?! You’re the best. Thanks for putting up with me.” Sehun stops Kyungsoo in his tracks as he throws his long arms around Kyungsoo’s shoulders. Kyungsoo had never been much for skinship, so his immediate instinct was to squirm his way out of Sehun’s grip.

“Yah! Don’t make me regret my decision. Now come on. Pick up the pace or else you’ll be late on your first day.”

Yeah, and some hypocrite he was. After making sure Sehun had reached his classroom without getting lost, Kyungsoo raced down the stairs towards his own room. Cursing himself for falling for the younger boys charm and spending a few extra minutes talking to him. His watch reads 8:07 A.M., which made Kyungsoo a whopping seven minutes late to his class.

Entering his classroom, Kyungsoo almost does a double take as he realizes that his class had almost doubled in size, leaving almost no empty space left in the studio. Spotting a bit of room near a familiar mop of brown hair, Kyungsoo makes his way there as inconspicuously as possible, feeling the eyes of his peers boring holes into him despite his attempts to go unnoticed.

Standing next to the tall boy, Kyungsoo straightens his back to get a glimpse of his instructor who has already launched into a series of complicated dance motions. He can’t help but stare, captivated by the agile motions of his teacher’s small frame. Instructor Yixing, with bold black hair and a lean body, is extremely well versed in the area of dance. He can make even the simplest of routine seem very complex and graceful. Right now though, the new routine actually seemed more challenging than the previous choreographies and Kyungsoo could feel the nerves start setting in as the realization hit him that he would have to manage to replicate those same, exact movements.

Even though Kyungsoo is currently taking the second level dance course, he still has not gotten used to his teacher’s hurried pace. While every other student manages to follow the instructor’s moves with ease, Kyungsoo faces a difficult time adapting to the nimble movements. His pride is his voice and Kyungsoo’s body just doesn’t seem to be fit for dance. He still continued with the class though, remembering Suho Hyung’s words of advice: “If you want to make it big, you should be well-rounded and you should be able to do everything from acting, to dancing, to singing, and more.”

He’s snapped out of his thoughts though, when music starts to play from the overhead speakers. , Kyungsoo thinks to himself, I didn’t catch the last part of the choreo.

As everyone around him attempts to mirror Yixing, Kyungsoo struggles to keep pace with them, silently thanking himself for picking a spot near the back. However, as Kyungsoo feigns his way to the end of the dance, there’s one person in particular that hasn’t even budged from his spot yet.

“Psst,” he whispers quietly, leaning towards the boy so he could hear him better, “even if you can’t dance well, I suggest you make a small effort to move your arms at least. If Instructor Yixing sees you not participating, then you’ll be dead meat.”

Before Kyungsoo can wait to hear the boy’s reply, Yixing starts the track up from the beginning, and Kyungsoo falls back into his groove again. This time though, the music is cut off abruptly as Yixing makes his way towards Kyungsoo’s direction. With each step closer, Kyungsoo’s anxiety grows. He thinks that this time for sure Yixing would reprimand him for his lack of dance skills. Yixing is only a mere few meters away and Kyungsoo feels beads of perspiration form by his hairline. He really hates his flaws to be pointed, much less in front of a class of almost fifty kids. Kyungsoo was surely going to end up as the laughing stock of the School of Arts for having the dance attributes of a toddler. Yixing is a matter of two steps away and Kyungsoo squeezes his eyes shut, trying to prepare himself for whatever criticisms were due his way.

However, Kyungsoo feels Yixing move past him, rather than stop in front of him. Not realizing that he had been holding his breath in, Kyungsoo sighs in relief and peeks out of the corner of his eye to find the victim of Yixing’s wrath. It’s the boy next to him.

Wait, I’ve seen this boy before.

“Hi, I’m instructor Zhang Yixing, but feel free to call me Yixing. I believe this is the first time we’re meeting. What’s your name?” Yixing has his arms held behind his back as he stands authoritatively in front of the boy. Yixing is a couple of inches shorter than the slim boy, but even so Yixing is the one commanding all the attention. Yixing is the scariest when he gets in tiff because he’s usually quiet and patient, but when he is angered his biting sarcasm comes out and it leaves no emotion untouched. He rarely ever has to yell at anyone, but everyone can tell this is going to be one of those rare occurrences.

The boy mumbles something in response to Yixing, but it is inaudible to everyone but Yixing.

“You’re the first-year that was able to test out of my level one dance class right?”

Yixing’s question only elicits a small nod from the taller boy.

“Well then Mr. Kim if you’re so advanced that you can just skip the prerequisite for this class and you have the nerve to refuse to follow along with instructions you must have some kind of special privilege, right? So then, why don’t you show the class how “special” you are that allows you to just stand still while your classmates are working tirelessly.”

As yixing walks back to the computer to play the track again, Kyungsoo can’t help but feel sorry for the taller boy. He was being humiliated in front of the whole class on his first day, and, to top it off, the boy is only just a first year.

The music starts to play, and the boy tilts his head up. The light catches his face at the perfect angle and Kyungsoo takes in a sharp intake of breath as he realizes that this is the boy that helped him yesterday. And, boy, was he beautiful. His caramel hair bobbing along with the rhythm. His lips pursed in concentration. His eyes appearing to shine underneath the warm glow of the illumination. His built torso ever so slightly starting to get into the music.

The boy methodically gyrates his body to the beat, maintaining a fluidity that almost matched Yixing’s. His facial expressions make his motions look effortless, while his actual movements seem to be driven with a powerful, passionate force. Kyungsoo follows every motion with his eyes, as he hungrily laps up every square inch of the boy’s lean body. Just like everyone else in the room, Kyungsoo is entirely enthralled, only able to dream to be able to harness that kind of talent.

Finally, the choreography comes to an end, and the boy ceases, the beginnings of a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. He turns to scan the crowd, spending a few extra milliseconds locked in eye contact with kyungsoo.

Wait, was that a wink? Did he just wink at me?

Kyungsoo’s captivation is replaced with utter embarrassment as he imagines how absolutely dumb he must look right now. With his lips parted and his eyes hinting at lust, Kyungsoo must really look pathetic.

The timer at the front of the room chimes, signaling the end of class and Kyungsoo is whisked away with the crowd into the hallway. He still hasn’t been able to shake off the feelings from the previous class, as he dazedly makes his way to the campus cafeteria.

It turns out that Sehun has lunch during the same time too, and the two boys end up sitting together at a small table, with Sehun chattering endlessly about his first class. Kyungsoo makes an effort to pay attention to Sehun, but his thoughts uncontrollably wander back to his dance class. Kyungsoo blinks and the boy’s beautifully, bronzed and smooth skin surfaces. He blinks again to remove the image, but only ends up picturing the smirk playing on the boy’s face. He imagines just how beautiful the boy would look if he actually smiled.

“Hyung. Hyung! Hyung!!” Sehun breaks Kyungsoo’s fantasy as he shakes his shoulder to get Kyungsoo’s attention. “Our lunch break is over! We should head back to our classes.”

Nodding in response, Kyungsoo, with his untouched tray of food, follows Sehun as they discard their meals and head back to the arts building.

“I’ll meet you at the bus stop where we got off.” Kyungsoo instructs Sehun as they both part ways to their final few classes.

Kyungsoo’s mind incessantly distracts him, planting images of the mysterious boy from dance into his thoughts. Eventually though, Kyungsoo’s academic instinct kicks in as he reminds himself that he is attending this university on a scholarship and he needs to keep his grades up if he wants to keep it. Kyungsoo’s classes are rigorous and thought provoking enough that, by the end of the day, all traces of the boy from earlier have disappeared.

Sehun joins Kyungsoo at the bus stop as they both head back to their apartment building. The younger boy pleads with Kyungsoo to spend some time with him, but Kyungsoo politely declines as his teachers have already piled up homework on him.

As soon as Kyungsoo enters his flat, he dumps his books out of his battered bag and slowly gets to work on his packets of complicated music theory. A few hours later, Kyungsoo is awoken by an ear piercing noise. Looking around for the source of the uproar, Kyungsoo is blinded by the silver flashes of the fire alarm in his room. Scrambling to his feet, Kyungsoo grabs his jacket and hurriedly rushes down the fire escape, almost tumbling down the last few steps.

Spotting a familiar mess of black hair, Kyungsoo makes his way over to Sehun.

“Kyungsoo!” Sehun rushes towards his hyung, having an awful lot of energy for it being two in the morning. “Come on, I want you to meet my roommate!”

Literally being pushed from behind by the younger boy, Kyungsoo is led to the spot where Sehun had just occupied only seconds prior. He stops, mid-tracks, when he sees an all too familiar pair of golden legs. With only a towel wrapped around his waist, the unknown, alluring boy from the morning stands there in plain sight, running a hand through his damp hair. Beads of water are still visible on his toned torso, and the reflection of the night city lights illuminate the deep contours of his body.

With one final shove, Sehun has successfully managed to bring his hyung to his roommate, and he proceeds to introduce them to each other, “Do Kyungsoo, meet Ki-.”

“Kim Jongin. I believe we’ve sort of met already. I apologize for my disheveled appearance, but the alarm rang while I was in the shower.” Jongin explains as the a corner of his mouth turns upward in a sly smile.

Whoa, even his voice sounds musical. Kyungsoo, oblivious to Jongin’s introduction, can’t draw his gaze away from the boy’s robust body.

“You have something stuck to your cheek.” Jongin reaches out towards Kyungsoo and dislodges a sticky note from it. Caressing that same cheek with his hand, Jongin rubs the sticky note area gently with his thumb to get rid of some stray pencil marks which had transferred onto Kyungsoo’s pale cheek. “Looks like you really got into your homework.”

Smiling sheepishly, Kyungsoo mumbles a thanks, and he can feel all the blood rushing to his cheeks.

“What you did today morning. That was pretty cool. You’re a really talented dancer. You’re basically as good as Yixing!” Kyungsoo blurts out, wanting to prolong his interaction with Jongin as much as he can.

“You think so? I’ve been dancing my whole life, so that’s kind of what I was going for.” Jongin replies, smirking again and making Kyungsoo’s inside feel like jelly.

Before he can say anything else, Kyungsoo is whisked away by Sehun, dragging him off to who knows where.

“So Jongin is actually your roommate, right?” Kyungsoo asks an overly eager Sehun.

“Yes of course! He’s the best roommate ever. Do you have a roommate? Because you should totally just room with us. Think of how much fun that would be!” Sehun replies, searching for someone or something among the throng of apartment residents.

Rooming with Jongin, now that would be interesting.

Kyungsoo imagines waking up to find Jongin making an omelet with only a tiny towel wrapped around his waist, much like his appearance tonight. Hearing Kyungsoo arrive, Jongin would look over his shoulder at him and throw him an I-know-I’m-y smirk. As Jongin cooked, Kyungsoo would sit at the table and watch as the golden, morning rays of sunshine radiated onto Jongin’s lean frame, highlighting his muscles whenever he would move. Jongin would slowly bring his omelet to him, and Kyungsoo would be too busy agonizing over the way that Jongin’s towel rested precariously on his hipbones, threatening to come loose. Kyungsoo feels the blood that was racing to his face change direction and rush downwards.

, Kyungsoo, don’t do this to yourself. Not here. Not now.


A/N: I just wanted to say sozzz for this crappy chapter. It was a lot of pre-relationship background stuff. Lot's of loner ksoo. I promise that the next chapter will start to pick up pace! Not all the characters have been introduced so there are more pairings to come ;) uhuhuh this fic prolly won't even get any views TT.TT I need to let out my Kaisoo feels tho. Idk when I'll update, maybe I'll have chapter 2 up by the end of this week? I wasn't planning on starting this until summer break, but things happened and I just couldn't wait. I'll write in my spare time though so hopefully another chapter will be up soon!

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