“Do you know the reason he became a shadow?” Hyukjae looked at Kyuhyun. He seemed to stick to him like a fly when Donghae wasn't around. “The memories of our past life become hazy after we've turned. And the longer we wander the other world, the more we forget.. But there's one thing that we just won't be able to erase from our memories.. As if we were prohibited from forgetting why we became like this. A constant reminder.. I see it as a punishment. For falling for the darkness.” His voice sounded nonchalant.   “What was yours?” Hyukjae was indeed interested. The other looked at him for a moment. “Suicide as a result of extreme bullying.” The older didn't say anything. School could turn to a horrible place. “Kangin was sold as slave a few hundred years ago. His mistreatment shoved him to the edge and finally over it.” Kyuhyun looked around. His eyes skimmed the crowd, seeing the lights and shadows of each soul.   Then his gaze turned to Hyukjae again. “Donghae succumbed to the darkness because he lost his sister. He looked after her at all times. But that one time he didn't, she was abducted and murdered. She was everything he had. He lost control and killed the guy who was responsible. But in the end, it didn't change anything..” He went a silent for a second. “Nothing changes..”         Donghae looked at the black mass creeping through the night of the city. Kangin had a leg up at the edge of the roof, leaning on it with an arm. “So it's true..” Donghae kept watching it. Kyuhyun sighed. “What do we do? Call more of us?” The oldest rose. “No.. It won't matter. This is something we cannot win in mass.”   Kangin was the only one of the three to know more. He had been there the last time. He had witnessed how so many fell into darkness. Not just humans.. “We have to find what's pulling it.” The youngest lifted a brow. “What should we be looking for?” “Normally shadows are pulled by blackened souls to tarnish them completely. But this is different. We have to look for a being with the purest of lights. It needs all this power for that.”
Donghae turned away for the first time to look at his friend. “It wants to touch a pure light?” “Yes. It's very rare that a soul is absolutely pure, without even a speck of blackness..” Kyuhyun scoffed. Yeah.. They all had dark thoughts. Some more or greater than others, but they all had them.. “What do we do once we find them?” Kangin didn't answer right away. Then he looked at the youngest. “Just make sure the shadows don't find them before us.”         “What about that one?” “No.. His light is strong but he's not the one.” Kyuhyun sighed. He eyed the young man again, contorting his mouth. “Urgh.. Religious..”   Said man felt a shiver running down his back. “Siwon? What's wrong?” His companion looked at him questioning. Siwon shook his head, smiling. “Nothing.”   Kyuhyun looked through the crowds. “Hey, there's Hyukjae and his friends.” He sounded unimpressed but his eyes never turned away from the group. Donghae followed his gaze. “You've been telling him things.. Why?” The younger didn't look at his friend. “Why not? He's going to be a shadow soon anyway. Maybe he even turns into one of us. It doesn't matter what he knows..”   Donghae was calm. “It does.” Kyuhyun turned his head, sighing. “You still think you can save him? Don't be ridiculous, Donghae.. He's different, I admit. But you can see it. He's lost..” The boy stood up from his seating position. “I warned you. You're too fond of him.”         “What happens when you find that pure light?” “I don't know.. Kangin didn't tell us.” Hyukjae and Donghae sat on the roof they had went to the first time, looking over the lights of the city. After a moment of silence the older opened his mouth, his eyes still gazing ahead. “Have you ever wondered why you became like this? Why you're different from those shadows?” “Yeah.. I never understood why someone who succumbed to the darkness, who should have been lost, has now a job of protecting.”   He looked down. “Kyuhyun sees it as punishment. So that we remember what we have done..” Hyukjae faced him. “What about you?” The other took a calm breath. “I don't know.. The oldest shadow I know once told me that mother earth picks us to balance the world. Because if there is light, there always is darkness.. And if there is darkness, there will be light.. Someones has to watch over the balance. We are the ones that have to do that.”   “You have a very important job.” Donghae let his eyes close a bit. “One that needs a lot of sacrifices..” The older touched the cheek of the other, who continued in a soft whisper. “I once thought that maybe this is our chance to redeem ourselves.. To amend because we lost to the darkness.. But it hurts.. It's cold.. It's dark... And it's lonely.” He looked Hyukjae in the eyes, his gaze distant but boring.   “If I had a choice, I would want a different life. Or whatever you would call this..” Donghae walked away from the other. “I don't want this for anyone..”         Hyukjae sat in their cafeteria, not really paying attention to his surroundings, just eating his lunch. Sungmin was watching him from the seat next to him. But he didn't notice the worried gaze, as well. “Are you sure you're okay? You know I was only joking last time.” The younger looked up, frowning slightly. “What?” Sungmin hesitated. “I don't know.. It feels like you're distancing yourself from me. To a place I can't follow.”   Hyukjae gazed at his friend. He remembered what Kyuhyun had told him. That Sungmin was worried about him. He had always had a rather observant perception of things, but the younger never thought he would notice something like this. He rose an eyebrow. “I don't know what you're talking about.” Sungmin sighed. “Don't try with me, Hyukjae.” Said boy let his gaze fall. The older continued.   “I let you be all this time, but every time I look at you it seems to be getting worse.. I'm afraid.. And I don't even understand why.” Hyukjae didn't answer. What was there to say? That his friend was right..? That he was going to leave this world soon..? That he would probably become a monster...? “Don't you trust me?” Sungmin had furrowed his brows in an angry fashion. The younger took a breath. “That's not it.. Just.. It's difficult.”   He rose from his seat. “I'll see you later.” He walked away from his friend. He knew it wasn't right. Sungmin had a right to know. But he couldn't say it. He couldn't..         “It's going to destroy him when you're gone.” Kyuhyun watched Sungmin from his shadows. “He truly treasures you..” Hyukjae stayed silent. The younger turned away to follow the other boy. “You know I never had a friend like that.. Maybe things might have been different if I had talked to someone. If there had been someone who showed the slightest interest in me staying alive..”         “Why is it.. that your heart won't stop turning black? Are my words really that meaningless?” Hyukjae put his arms around the other from behind. “Why is it that you keep trying even though it won't change anything?” Donghae turned around, frowning. “I keep trying because I want to spare you from this fate! This isn't something you should want. And I don't care if you think you deserve it! You should live. You should experience happiness.” “What happiness is there for someone like me?”   “There always is happiness. You just have to look for it..” Hyukjae's gaze softened. “What if my happiness is you?” Donghae paused, looking at the other with slightly widened eyes. Then his expression became sad. “You shouldn't desire something that is out of your reach..” He looked down while Hyukjae stayed quiet. He knew.. The younger was a shadow.. He himself would become one soon. But worlds lay between them. Now.. and in the future.. Still, Hyukjae couldn't deny his feelings.   “You're the first one to make a difference.. My friends.. my family.. they never understood. Or cared... You did. You tried to show me the kindness of the world. It didn't work because it didn't concern me. It wasn't my life those moments were about. They had no meaning.. But you..” He Donghae's face gently. “You changed that.. You cared. You understood.. And you still try to save me.” The corner of the older's mouth jerked into a weak smile. “You are the light of my shadow.”   Donghae's gaze still showed sadness and pain. “Did you try and make them understand? Did you talk to anyone about it? You didn't. So how would they understand? How can you expect them to understand something that's inside you..?” He placed his hand over Hyukjae's, whose smile had vanished again. “I know it's not easy. Talking about the most sensitive and vulnerable part of a soul.. I myself couldn't do it. But you still have the chance! Please.. Try.. Live.. if not for yourself, do it for me.” He looked at the older expectantly. The words pained Hyukjae. It wasn't what he had wanted to hear. But Donghae was right.         Sungmin opened the door, blinking surprised at Hyukjae's figure in front of him. “Hyukjae.” “Hey.. Can we talk?” The older paused. “Yeah, of course!” He stepped aside. “Come in.”         “We still haven't found anyone with a completely pure light.” Kyuhyun looked over the city. “They all have some speck of darkness. It's human.” He looked at Kangin. “What do we do now? The shadows keep coming.” The ol