Final

Hunting Season
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*Kris*

"Kris, you need to stop staring at that boy, if he sees you staring he might run away" I took my eyes off the adorable boy who sat in front of me who strangely resembeled a panda to give my best friend a look that could kill.

"I wasn't staring, i was just observing" My best friend laughed sarcastically and she slapped my arm lightly.

"Why don't you go talk to him, he may like you" I stood up and made my way out of the busy cafeteria with my best friend following slowly behind

"I'm not going to talk to him" My best friend grabbed my arm and spun me around.

"Why?" I sighed loudly enough for everyone in the corridor to turn and look at us. 

"" I grabbed my best friend and pulled her into the clutter janitor's closet.

"I'm confused, why did you bring me in here" I face palmed and she chuckled.

"I brought you in here because i didn't want to talk about my personal life in front of everyone in school, anyway i am not going to speak to that boy because if i do people might actually think that i am a nice guy and then everyone will try to talk to me and i just want to be known as the boy who only has one friend and a cold as ice personality" My best friend started laughing and i gave her a confused look.

"Everyone knows you're a nice guy the only reason they don't talk to you is because you're scary as " I walked out of the janitors closet and my best friend ran after me.

"Kris, if you d

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Lemonny_chan
#1
Chapter 1: Wow update pls..
gogo_galaxygirl
#2
Chapter 1: I think this would have been a really brilliant chaptered fic. I like that Kris mentions that his cool guy act is a persona. I just feel like there's not really an ending. A cliffhanger is one thing, but I feel like I have to make up my own ending and that sort of defeats the purpose of a fanfic. As far as the technical writing goes, you said "my best friend" a lot. Try using different pronouns like "she," "the girl," or something like that. And when you end dialogue, you should put a comma in when you have narrative text after it. Honestly, I don't love it, but it and you have a lot of potential to be really great.

Good luck! :)
- Kris
Sweet_love_Exo_ships
#3
I really want to read it ! Update when you can !