I'm back ^^ 

Thanks for the wait,here's my new chapter ^^

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I was wondering what could wake me up in the middle of the night.

The weird feeling got all over my body and I just opened my eyes.

,,Where am I?”

I thought about that firstly.

I lifted my body a bit and all I saw was darkness. I wonder how did I even come here.

,,Agh…” Headache hit me and I realized I almost died.

,,M-Myungsoo..” I looked around the room once again,before I got out the bed and some little light. Next I saw was Myungsoo sleeping on the floor,on the futon. His face looked so calm. I couldn’t help but feel nervous and heart-throbbing because he looked incredibly handsome even in his sleep. I wonder how do I look like. I noticed I was drooling a bit. Ew.

On some watch on the wall,I learned it was really late - or early. Myungsoo probably didn’t have any place else to leave me,so he brought me to his room. He’s too sweet. I smiled at him and thanked him for everything,before I sneaked out his room. Everything seemed so calm,so I hurried out his apartment.

,,This CEO is so weird. He says he has work in Japan and tells me to go with artists,with their plane. As if I’m some object.” I mumbled to my to my chin before I dragged myself to the plane.

,,Eonnie! You’re with us! Sit with me!” I heard familiar voices and it made me smile. I turned to see Bomi and Hayoung running to me. The rest of the girls were tiredly walking behind of them.

,,H-Hi!”

,,We need you to sit with one of us,Eun Ji decided to be with Sunggyu sunbaenim as alw- ahh! Naeun!” Namjoo frowned when Naeun lightly hit her arm.

,,Sorry.” She answered and boarded to the plane.

,,Don’t mind her. She thinks Eun Ji can be normal one day. We all lost hope,but I don’t know what makes her keep hers.” Chorong smiled before she grabbed my arm and dragged me to plane.

,,But it’s truth she only likes Sunggyu sunbaenim. I wonder if they date.” I couldn’t stand my skipping heart at Bomi’s Sunggyu mention. I don’t know why my heart still skips when just yesterday he broke my heart. I wonder if he even cares how much his words made deep scar in my heart. I sighed.

,,Eonnie,you okay?”

,,Uhm.”

We boarded plane and I prayed everything goes well. I saw Myungsoo and Sungjong going inside and the cute guy waved to me. Myungsoo just flashed me one smile and I did the same. I owe him big one. Then I saw him. Sunggyu. After few blinking,I managed to save my dying heart and looked away. It hurt like hell.

After half an hour of ride,I felt really nauseous. In CEO’s plane,I could sleep and here,knowing Sunggyu is here,I can’t keep myself calm. It didn’t last long before I rushed to toilet. I felt really sick and my throat hurted me so much. I felt like dying.

I vomited a lot before I noticed that people are waiting outside. All of my senses went numb and I couldn’t really see or hear,but I just washed my face in hope people won’t think I raised from dead.

I opened the door and saw no one else but the person I want to see last. Sunggyu.

I felt really tired and just imagine his eyes widened. I doubt he cares for me now.

I tried to leave,but I felt his strong hand on my wrist. Oh,no you can’t do this to me Sunggyu.

,,Wait.”

I sighed once again. My throat was killing me.

,,Can we talk?”

,,It’s not really the place.”

,,I need to ask you something.”

I felt really tired and nervous. I wanted to escape this scene. I wanted to escape Sunggyu first time in my life.

,,Ask me later,please. Let me go.” I felt really weak under his grip,but I couldn’t fight back. My weakness was killing me,but I hope he can’t see it. I don’t need his mercy now after all the things he had done.

,,Okay.” He let go of my wrist and went inside the toilet. But as he did that,I remained confused. Did I hope he’ll protest and try to keep on asking me the thing he wanted to ask? Did I think he’d care and ask if I was alright? That he’d notice I was feeling like dying right now? Did he even try to notice? I could feel my heart tearing apart. My throat hurt even more and I felt it tightened a lot. Sunggyu,you bastard.

,,Are you okay? You don’t look well.” I felt Myungsoo holding my shoulders. All I could do was showing little smile and going back to my seat. As I sat,my vision went blank,and I slept the rest of the trip.

,,Ji Ae...Eonnie’s back...Open…”

,,EONNIE!!” Ji Ae hugged me with her deathly hug and I lost that little air I had in my lungs.

,,I missed you so much!”

,,I was… out for 3 days...though….” I tried to catch breath as this kid continued to break my bones.

,,Nevermind,I still missed you.”

,,I missed you too.” I could feel another strong arms hugging me from back and tightening me even more.

,,H-Hi,Woohyun.” I smiled and felt too tired to fight them back. Even though they fought over who’ll hug me stronger.

After our hugging session,I was finally free and in my room. I sighed,recalling everything that happened yesterday. When I saw Ji Ae,I felt so sad and angry with myself. How could she feel if she learned I came dead from this trip? How could I be so stupid to actually attempt something like that? You stupid,stupid girl.

,,Tired already?” I saw Woohyun at my door and his smiling face. Somehow,I felt like I missed it.

,,Uhm. I missed sleeping in my bed.” I said with sleepy voice and I did feel that way.

,,So,how was Japan?”

,,It was… fun.”

,,You don’t sound so… amazed.”

,,Let’s just say I’ll never forget it.” I showed little smile before I lay down on my bed.

,,Ahhh,I missed this smell and softness so much.” I smelled nice smell of my sheets and already felt in my dreams.

,,I’ll leave you then. Sleep tight.” I felt Woohyun tapping my head and gently closing my doors. But I regret it next moment. Somehow,I felt safe near Woohyun and when he left,this feeling of loneliness got over my body once again. In this moment,I really didn’t want to be alone. I shut my eyes in hope this feeling will go away. But just then,Woohyun again opened my door and started to tell something about losing his phone in my room. Then,when he found it,he apologized with a smile and was about to leave.

,,Woohyun,uhm… Can you stay until I fall asleep?”

Woohyun gave me most questioning look ever,but he didn’t ask anything. He just neared my bed and sat next to it. His hand reached mine and he held it.

,,Don’t worry,I’m here. Sleep tight.” He smiled and covered blanked over me. I felt so safe,so protected. I was so thankful to Woohyun at this moment.

,,Thank you so much.”

,,Shhh,just sleep.” He said and caressed my hair. Feeling his gentle fingers,I felt myself getting carried to dream world.

,,Eonnie,wake up!”

I felt bright light over my face. Is it already morning?

,,Uhmm…”

,,Eonnie,you slept for 12 hours. You’re lucky you have a day off or you’d be in a problem.” I opened my eyes wider and saw Ji Ae opening windows and taking off my blanket.

She later made me really nice breakfast and took care of my unpacking. She wanted me to just rest and went to work. With wonder,I decided to go in a walk. I liked how it was sunny and fresh air could help me.

Seoul streets really feel different than Japan. I decided to buy some new clothes and some things for our home. I felt little bit happy to see how people is looking after me. I bought some presents for Ji Ae,Dongwoo,Sungyeol and Woohyun. I was thankful to them a lot. I also thought about Apink,Sungjong and Myungsoo a lot. And of course,about Sunggyu. I couldn’t still believe what was happening. I lowered my head and looked at my shoes. I stopped with walking and. And when I lifted my head the first thing I saw was hair salon. I saw girls going in there all happy and curious. Then I got myself great idea.

=====

,,I don’t know what to do now. Something is really odd.”

,,You always say that after your attack.”

,,This was there for a reason. I feel that something is.. awaken in me.”

,,Sunggyu,should you stop saying nonsense? If I didn’t came,you’d be a plant now.”

Sunggyu rolled his eyes and turned to Howon.

,,Stop my treatments. Starting next week,I’m done with doctors.”

,,There’s no way. Did you go mad?”

,,Yaaah,Sunggyu. You stupid guy.” Eun Ji lightly hit Sunggyu in his shoulder and made an worried face.

,,It’s my life.” Sunggyu turned to go,just to be stopped by Howon.

,,No.”

Sunggyu turned to his boss again.

,,Do you remember that day? It took you 6 months. You can’t give up now.”

,,I recovered from it now. And I want to know. I’m living in darkness. Can’t you see it’s eating me? I can’t live like this anymore.”

Sunggyu took his jacket and slammed doors and left confused Howon and Eun Ji inside.

,,Oppa do something.”

,,I don’t want to. You’re too selfish.”

,,I’m allowed to be. Persuade him to go to sessions.”

,,I’m the boss here. I decide what’s the best for my artists. Not you.”

,,Well,like it or not,I’m your sister.”

,,I always make the wrong choice every time you tell me that.”

Howon smiled and left the room,leaving Eun Ji. She sighed in annoyance and followed Howon out.

,,Oppa,you can’t do this,it’s not good for him. He’s sick he needs help.”

,,He’s not sick.”

,,He’s sick in his brain.”

,,Stop it,Eun Ji.”

,,You don’t want your artists to start making scenes on the stage.”

,,I said stop it.”

,,It’s gonna lose you mone-”

,,I said STOP IT.” Howon shouted and made all people in corridor turn in his way. Eun Ji froze in her place,but Howon just turned and walked away. She felt really pissed off to be cut in that kind of way.

Sunggyu stormed into his studio. He sat on the couch and put his head between his knees. He felt really strange.

,,What’s...wrong with me?” He felt his hands shaking and his eyes tearing. Suddenly,he felt enormous pain in his head. He grabbed his head with his hands and rolled on the couch,trying to ease the pain. But,he felt as if it was trying to go out of him. That kind of pain he felt.

,,AGHH!” He felt his cheeks getting red and wet from his tears.

,,Sunggyu…”

Sunggyu felt scared once again after hearing voices in his head. He wanted to scream.

,,Sunggyu… you look like a hamster.”

Suddenly,his eyes widened and the pain started to disappear. Sunggyu frowned,because some strange feeling got over his body. It wasn’t fear or angriness,but feeling of relief. Sunggyu closed his eyes and he saw… a girl.

,,Sunggyu… I believe in you.”

She was standing with her back facing him and wind was messing her hair. He could hear the girl was smiling.

Sunggyu tried to near her,to see her face.

,,Who are you?”

Sunggyu was surprised he actually said something.

,,Search more and you’ll find out.”

Sunggyu reached his hand to touch her shoulder,but as he did that the girl disappeared and he woke up.

His forehead was sweaty,but at least his headache was gone.

,,Just what was that?”

Sunggyu stood up and looked around the room,feeling lost. For some reason,he was reminded of one girl. Sunggyu grabbed his coat and hurried outside.

=====

,,Oh my God,eonnie...Is that… you?”

,,Hehe,tadaah!”

,,W-What did you do?”

,,What do you mean? Can’t you see?”

,,You look...amazing.” Woohyun grabbed my waist and lifted me in the air. I wonder why he did that,but it was fun.

,,Eonnie,why did you cut your hair? I mean,why so short?” Ji Ae stared at the new me. When I saw that hair salon,I knew I needed to change something. And it was my hair. I told hair stylist to cut it short. My hair was with me through all my dark moments. When I cut it,I felt like I’m getting rid of my past and opening a new page. Like a new start.

My hair was little bit longer than my ears,it reaches half of my neck.

,,Woow,you remind me of IU when she had that hairstyle.” Sungyeol appeared on the door,with his bright,gummy smile. He,of course,dragged Dongwoo with him.

,,Waa,who’s this girl,can I get her number?” Dongwoo grabbed my hands and started to dance with me. I could only laugh at his doings.

,,You even changed your hair color?” Sungyeol came near my hair and touched it.

,,Yup,I darkened it a bit.”

,,You’re really brave,eonnie.”

,,I really like it.” Woohyun smiled. Dongwoo and Sungyeol only nodded. I felt so happy. I was trembling a bit,but I felt like I needed to do this. The results are wonderful after all.

,,But,just let me ask… Eonnie,why did you cut your hair?” All three of them looked at me and admired Ji Ae for such a good question.

,,I needed a new start. Cutting my hair is just a first step.” I added a little smile and I felt my eyes watering a bit. Why did I sound so desperate and sad?

,,Eonnie…” Ji Ae came and hugged me. Woohyun smiled a bit and Sungyeol and Dongwoo looked confused. But I’m glad I’m here with them. There’s nothing more I wanted.

Before I went to bed,I looked at the little box I kept my old stuff at. A lot of Sunggyu and my pictures,mom’s picture,some of my old books and CDs. Then I saw a special one…

Once I made Sunggyu record his voice and made a present out of it for the Christmas eve. I remember how happy he looked to finally receive his recorded voice. I saved one copy for me to listen to it when I miss him. I did it every night though. Even when he was really gone.

It has to be you

My burning heart says

It can’t be without you

The answer to my question

From your brown hair

To your white feet

You have to be mine

My eyes teared up a bit. I stopped to play it and sighed. Just like my cutted hair,it’s time to say goodbye. I waited for too long and got hurt. I can’t live like this anymore.

,,Goodbye… Sunggyu.” I felt tears rolling down my cheeks and the warm feeling made me tremble a bit. I quickly put those things back in the box and decided to put it deep into my closet.

,,Hey,can you come for the dinner? Dongwoo,Sungyeol and Ji Ae looked so serious while cooking,hahahh.” I jumped out of surprise when I saw Woohyun entering my room. I quickly closed my closet and smiled to Woohyun.

,,Why don’t you cook? You said you’re good at it once.”

,,I like to see other people torture,hehe.”

,,You mean thing.” I laughed and Woohyun escorted me to the table. I saw happy Ji Ae and worried Sungyeol as he looked at the thing on the table.

,,Where’s Dongwoo?”

,,He tried some of these… Still didn’t get out the bathroom…” Sungyeol laughed a bit.

,,As his dongsaeng,I apologize for… the mess he may made.” Woohyun and Sungyeol started to chuckle. Ji Ae cleared .

,,Anyways,it’s good eonnie,let’s eat!”

,,Sure I won’t end up like Dongwoo Oppa?”

,,Yaah,I made this out of my heart…”

,,We can feel it…” Woohyun started to laugh and made Ji Ae red. Then he apologized and tapped her head which made her even more red.

,,Ahh,you waited for me too long?” Dongwoo got out the bathroom with shy look.

,,Yeah,our food got really cold.” Sungyeol teased Dongwoo and I couldn’t help but laugh as an idiot whole time. I really like them. All of them. I’m glad I met them all.

=====

,,Woohyun,can you please call my eonnie? Dinner will be ready soon.”

Woohyun felt his grin getting bigger and bigger.

,,Yeah,I’ll bring your eonnie,sweet girl.” Woohyun send some heart with his hands to Ji Ae which she just accepted with red face. Woohyun was proud on his charming everything and wanted to show how special he was while throwing heart and making girls melt. Sometimes,girls would think it looks funny,but Woohyun is Woohyun and you can’t take eyes off him. He was indeed special. He wonders if Ji Won can go through his charm. So he decided to make her fall for him. For some reason,Woohyun felt so right about Ji Won. She made his days and he felt so incomplete without her. He didn’t know how she felt about him,but he was happy when she asked him to stay with her before she fell asleep. Woohyun jumped to her doors and just when he was about to knock,he heard some singing voice coming out of her room.

,,...The answer to my question

From your brown hair…”

Woohyun froze. He opened her doors a bit and saw heart broking scenery. Ji Won that was crying next to some box. Her eyes weren’t blinking,just staring at the blank space. Tears just rolled out of her eyes.

,,Just what are you hiding,Ji Won?”

Woohyun felt his fist tightening and his heart breaking. He couldn’t stand looking at her like this. She never mentions,but he was deadly curious about her past. He didn’t want to be tangled into her bad memories,but he wondered if most of her memories were bad.

,,What are you doing to me,Ji Won?”

,,Goodbye...Sunggyu.”

Woohyun felt like his heart was hit by something. It skipped a lot by mentioning guy’s name. He probably is the reason she’s so sad.

,,That stupid…” Woohyun wanted to punch that guy in the face. He watched Ji Won putting her stuff into the closet and then he stepped into her room.

Woohyun couldn’t really sleep. He wondered who the guy was.

,,Sunggyu...why does it sound so familiar?”

He tried to think and think. Where did he heard it before?

Tomorrow,Ji Won was gone to her work and Woohyun persuaded Ji Ae to give him their apartment’s key. He still doesn’t know how he does it,he’s really impressed by his skills.

,,Woow,I’m good. Really good..”

He knew that what he was doing was wrong and he’s breaking someone’s privacy,but his curiosity was killing him. He need to know,now.

He slowly opened Ji Won’s doors and entered her room. It was clean and bright as always and smelled like her a lot. He remembered where she put the box,so he hurried after hearing Ji Ae shouting for him to hurry.

,,Give me the time,I swear to God I left my phone here.” Woohyun continued to search and found her box. He quickly opened her and saw her older pictures. She looked so happy… Unlike now. Her smile was brighter,her complexion was happier,she felt different. He found couple of more pictures,with some guy. He knew it was that Sunggyu guy.

,,Pff,this guy looks so funny.” Woohyun laughed a bit. But he felt like he saw this guy somewhere already.

,,Sunggyu…”

,,Oppa,are you done? Did you find it?” Woohyun heard Ji Ae’s footsteps nearing the room. He hurried and put the photo in his pocket and returned box to it’s place.

,,Uhm,yeah,found it.” Woohyun hurried to doors where Ji Ae was at. She looked at him confused,but just turned away after Woohyun smiled at her and went out.

Woohyun couldn’t stop looking at the photo. There was something familiar with it,he knew he needed to find out what.

,,Woohyun,are you ready? We need to go now.” Dongwoo suddenly jump in front of him.

,,What’s this?” Dongwoo said playfully and took the photo out of Woohyun’s palm.

,,YAAH!” Woohyun jumped off the couch and started to chase his Hyung around the apartment. Dongwoo grinned like a idiot and teased Woohyun by closing himself in his room.

,,Woow,what a nice picture,is this Ji Won?” Dongwoo laughed while leaning himself on the door so that Woohyun can’t enter.

,,Yaah,don’t look! Hyung,give it back!”

,,Ohh,and she’s with some guy,feeling jealous much,Woohyun?”

,,Hyung! Aish,give it back!”

,,But...wait.” Dongwoo walked away from the door and Woohyun took a chance and entered it and literally jumped on Dongwoo.

,,Why is she with Sunggyu?”

Woohyun froze in his place. He widened his eyes and looked at Dongwoo.

,,How do you know?”

,,Know what?”

,,That his name is Sunggyu?” Dongwoo started to laugh,but after looking at serious Woohyun,he stopped.

,,You don’t know this guy?”

,,Should I need to know?”

,,Yeah…”

,,Why? Who’s he?”

,,He’s one really popular singer,Woohyun.”

Woohyun blinked at Dongwoo’s last words.

,,W-what? A singer?”

,,Yeah,I love his songs,he has amazing voice. Once I saw him in real life,he looks like a fo-”

,,How is Ji Won connected to this guy? Yesterday,I saw her crying while saying goodbye to him and putting some old box in her closet and I don’t know what the hell is happening.”

,,Maybe she knew him… Like he was her friend or maybe something more. Boyfriend,maybe?”

,,Why would she date someone who looks so stupid and lazy? C’mon,look at his eyes.”

,,I don’t know,he looks fine by me.” Woohyun looked at Dongwoo’s grin.

,,You worry me,Hyung.” Woohyun made concerned face and tapped Dongwoo’s shoulder.

,,Anyways,thank you for your help,I need some answers.” Woohyun hurried out of the room,just to be again stopped by Dongwoo.

,,I know you’re an idiot,but we have classes to attend and it took us long time to enter it and remember I waited for you to finally enter University so that we could go together. I won’t give all those years to let you escape your classes. You’re going with me.”

Dongwoo grabbed Woohyun’s collar and dragged him out the room and grabbed his stuff.

,,B-But,Hyung..”

,,No but. Let’s go.”

=====

,,It’s really hard to keep my hair into the ponytail now. It keeps on falling out…”

,,Hehe,the perks of having a long hair.”

,,But,I don’t miss it at all. I like my new hair.”

,,Then I like it too.”

,,Thanks,Sungyeol.”

,,My shift ends in 8. When are you done?”

,,Ahh,today I won’t be done until 10… You’re going home without me today.”

,,I think Ji Ae finishes at 8 as well. Well,good luck to you then.”

,,You guys are so lucky…”

,,Tells a person that just came from the Japan.” Sungyeol blinked to me and waved before he walked away. I smiled at his tall back,that looked so important in that security suit.

After cleaning couple of rooms,my pause started and I was finally able to see Ji Ae.

,,Eonnie…”

,,What’s up Ji Ae?”

,,You should really allow Woohyun less to come into your room.”

,,Why?” I smiled when remembering Woohyun. My heart felt at ease and calm.

,,Well,he told me he forgot his phone in your room yesterday. You should be careful it’s Woohyun after all.”

,,Wait,what? He told you that? When?”

,,This morning. He pleaded me to let him in your room to find it. After all,it’s Woohyun and I couldn’t stop him.”

,,Eeeh? He did what??”

,,Yeah..he’s such a pain.”

,,But,Ji Ae… He didn’t forget his phone. I know how it looks like,I didn’t saw it.”

,,I don’t know… He looked pretty desperate…” I flashbacked moment when he entered my room. It was when I returned my box into my closet. Could it be…

,,I need to go home.”

,,B-But your shift!”

,,Please make some excuse…”

,,Eonnie,you can’t!”

,,I can.”

,,Eonnie,I’m so sorry…”

,,It’s not your fault,Ji Ae.” I ran away from her and started running down the stairs. I picked my jacket and was ready to leave the building. My vision went blur and all I thought about was how to save my past from Woohyun. In that moment,I hit someone.

,,I’m so sorr-” I looked up. Oh no.

,,Long time no see.” Sunggyu smiled like he’s the happiest person alive.

,,Going somewhere?” He talked like he met his old friend. Like nothing happened. Idiot.

,,Yeah,home. Bye” I tried to pass by him,but he grabbed my wrist.

,,I came here all the way from the company,just to see you. Why are you not happy to see me?” He made sad face as if this all was just some joke.

,,I don’t care,I have to go.” I couldn’t look into his eyes and thought how to get away from him.

,,Well,you can’t go. I need to talk with you.” He grabbed my wrist and pushed me inside some storage room.

,,What are you doing?”

,,So that no one sees us. I can’t allow that.”

,,I don’t care,let me go.”

,,No.”

I looked at Sunggyu’s eyes. He looked serious now and his sharp eyes as if were tearing my soul apart. I probably looked kind of in shock,because I felt that way. Sunggyu’s hand traveled to my cheek. Another shock for me. I wonder what is he thinking when doing this. My forehead was little bit sweaty and I still breathed heavily. And now his hand on my cheek made me tremble. What’s with you Sunggyu,really?

,,I can’t understand why.. I don’t know what’s happening with me.”

,,Sunggy-”

,,But I can’t stop thinking about you. So tell me now.” Sunggyu leaned closer into my face.

,,Who are you?”

I gulped.

,,Are you someone from my past?”

,,Y-You really don’t remember?”

,,What should I remember? What did I forgot?”

,,I thought you pretended you don’t know me…”

,,Tell me who are you!”

,,Sunggyu… I…” My eyes traveled around his face and tried to find some answer. Some excuse to let me escape him.

,,I loved you so much…” My hand now traveled to his cheek.

,,I waited for you too long…” Sunggyu looked shocked.

,,Why did you forget me? I don’t know how I survived it…”

I sighed.

,,I’m really trying to forget you now.” My face got serious and my hand left his cheek. I looked away and tried to go. But Sunggyu grabbed my shoulders and pushed me onto the wall. I could feel slight pain,so I shouted a bit.

,,You didn’t answer my question. Who are you? Tell me,woman,WHO THE ARE YOU?”

I felt so terrified of the current Sunggyu. It was never the Sunggyu I knew before.

,,Why are you screaming at me? You never did that!”

,,I DON’T CARE! Explain me,tell me,DO SOMETHING! I’m lost for God’s sake!” Sunggyu leaned his head on my shoulder and I could feel him sobbing. Just what’s happening?

,,S-Sunggyu…”

,,I wanted to die. I really did. I can’t do anything. I’m so lost. Please help me…” I felt Sunggyu’s tears on my shirt. I felt so confused.

,,Sunggyu.” I lifted him from my shoulders and made him face me.

,,I’m lost too. I’m lost for my whole life. But you were my compass back then. That’s why I loved you so much. But you…”

,,Help me back too,now.” Sunggyu stopped me and I looked at him.

,,Be my compass this time.”

,,Then tell me,why can’t you remember me?”

,,I…”

My heart was racing really hard. Finally,I’ll get the answers.

,,I lost my memories 7 years ago. That was the day I was reborn.”