How can you smile so beautifully?

When  I look at you, my time stops

How am I in this kind of love? 

 

Luhan turned his head to me and smiled. He was running and I ran after him. That smile, melted my heart. His smile had some kind of magic that could stop the time. I was amazed with it. My heart stopped as I ran after him. Oh my, how did I trap myself into this kind of love? 

 

The words you say, the body movements when you talk

It knocks on my heart endlessly

But I am tightly shutting the door

 

He ran to the nearest door and shut it. I laughed, I knew it was one of his jokes. I ran to the nearest window and found him. He smiled and mocked me with his eyes. I hit the closed window over and over while I laughed. He charmed me with his jokes, his smile, his laughed. I couldn't stop smiling when he was around me. I had to admit, I love him. He always talked about the future, our future as a bestfriend and I couldn't help but smiled. The way he talked excitedly, I liked it. He knocked my heart with his jokes and his smile, but I tried to shut my heart. I know I wouldn't be with him.

 

In your eyes that look at me,

there aren’t any feelings that are like mine

It’s such a sad thing

to know your heart

 

Luhan always gave me a friendly look, not a lovely look. His feelings didn't same as my feelings. It was hurt, but I kept it hidden. We ran to the rooftop where we met Taeyeon. She was really beautiful. The three of us were bestfriends since we were young. We lived in the same building, same floor. She smiled at us and gave us a bottle filled with slippery liquid. We made bubbles with it. She made the bubles with a stick, its head was shaped like a donut, circle with a hole in the middle. She made the bubbles gracefully. I could see his eyes were on him. I envied her for that. She took his attention. He walked to us and tied a white bow on our wrist and tied a white bow on his own wrist. Luhan said it would be the signs of our friendship. 

 

I know there’s no hope,

so every time I look at you

It’s so hard, because I love you so much

It hurts so much when you say I’m just a friend

I’m standing outside the line that I can’t ever cross

It hurts but why can’t I turn away?

This hopeless love

 

I closed my eyes. He turned his head to me as we ran and asked me to run faster. I tried to run after him, but he looked like he didn't mean to wait for me. He held her hand. They ran together while I... I ran after them. She turned her head to me and smiled brightly. It seemed like the reality, when I always tried to ran after them,  I tried to equalize myself with them. I tried to reach them, but my heart felt hurt. They never really meant to wait for me. I stopped and looked at them with my eyes and sighed, he would never love me. I was just their friends. And they were a couple. I was just a troublesome for them, for him.

 

Just a little bit more, I’ll just look at you a little more

Then I can put away my feelings

That’s what I believed, that’s why I’m doing this

But my feelings are getting bigger and deeper

My heart won’t listen, it won’t get better

 

I looked at Luhan through the glass box infront of me. Taeyeon right beside me, she was looking at the toys inside the machine box. He tried to  grab a toy with a metal claw inside the box. I looked at his feature when he tried so hard to grab a toy with the claw. I ate my lolipop as he tried with the claw. I could feel how fast my heart was beating. Just one look, and I forgot about yesterday, when he grabbed her hand instead of mine. And then, he did it. We jumped and screamed excitedly as he took the toy out from the machine. I jumped to him when he walked passed me and gave the toy to her. I was still amused with the fact that he did it, but the amused expression on my face slowly faded and I looked at them. His eyes told her how great and how beautiful she was. Her eyes told him how wonderful he was. Quickly I changed my expression and jumped to them. My heart was crushed. It felt like my heart was sliced and squeezed. It was hopeless to love him. It made me hurt even more.

 

In your eyes that look at me,

there aren’t any feelings that are like mine

It’s such a sad thing

to know your heart

 

 I know my feelings was bigger that her. I hoped he realized that. When I was about to walk to my apartment, I saw them. They talked happily. I closed my eyes, I hoped it wasn't real. I leaned on the wall,  and I could feel tears on my cheeks. I erased my tears and and took the white bow on my wrist and released it. I looked at it and cried silently. No one could feel this as I could to him. I missed the old times when we were just bestfriends. 

 

I know there’s no hope,

so every time I look at you

It’s so hard, because I love you so much

It hurts so much when you say I’m just a friend

I’m standing outside the line that I can’t ever cross

It hurts but why can’t I turn away?

This hopeless love

 

I took a firework stick. I turned the firework on and played it. We jumped and laughed with our own firework sticks. We were childish, I knew it. There wasn't any man like him, like Luhan. He was a strong man, but childish. We loved to act like children. Suddenly, the tip of my index finger burnt because of the firework. He didn't look worry. He laughed and let her treated my finger. It was hopeless to love him.

 

 

Lonely, my heart that looks at you

This hopeless love

Is so painful

 

I drowned myself into the pool. I couldn't swim, I knew the fact. I didn't care, I couldn't help myself to see them together while I was alone with my heart in his hand. I felt lonely in the water, no movement in the water. But somehow it was calming. I wanted to die peacefully, and drowned in the water felt like a peaceful death. I was insane. It hurted more than I expected. I panicked as I couldn't breath in the water, but I kept calm. I was telling to myself that everything would be okay. My death would be peaceful. Suddenly, I could feel a movement in the water. I closed my eyes and I could feel a warm hand grabbed my hand.

 

Lonely, my heart that looks at you

This hopeless love

Is so painful

 

I opened my eyes and saw Luhan and Taeyeon. I cried and ran away. They didn't let me die after all things they did to me. I could hear they screamed and he ran after me. I screamed to stop him. I went to my empty apartment and closed the door. He tried to open the door, but I screamed to stop him. I leaned on the wall and cried loudly, I couldn't hold my feelings anymore. But I know it was useless.

 

I know there’s no hope,

so every time I look at you

It’s so hard, because I love you so much

It hurts so much when you say I’m just a friend

I’m standing outside the line that I can’t ever cross

It hurts but why can’t I turn away?

This hopeless love

 

Luhan managed to open the door. He looked at me deeply. I yelled to make him walked out from my apartment, but he stayed on his place, stood infront of me. "I can't leave you." I looked at him deeply at his eyes and tears fell from my eyes. My body was wet, and I was so sure that he couldn't see my tears. He walked closer to me. I took off the white bow from my wrist and gave it to him. I shut my eyes, "I can't be with the two of you. I-I... It hurts me." I muttered. He caressed my cheek, "Why?"he asked. I heard steps from the outside and I opened my eyes. She stood infront of the opened door. I yelled to them. I pushed him out from my apartment and I closed the door. No more love for me.

 

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Heyy! It's me lolme99(weird name huh?)

Anyway, we meet again in a one-shot story!!

The story is kinda crappy, isn't it? oh well.

byebyee