After the day I had decided to stop pursuing a love that would become unrequited after every sixty days, I had also started avoiding Suzy. I would go to school earlier and come home later than usual and instead of studying at my house, I would spend my time in the library or in the nearby café. I was doing my best in order to erase all the possibilities of us meeting each other again because of two reasons.

First, I was afraid that through our interactions, I would be drawn into her again and the painful cycle would repeat.

Second, I was trying to erase her in my memory. I was trying to forget her face, her scent, her warmth – everything about her – with hopes that I would heal the heart that she has broken and I would be able to detach any lingering feelings for her.

But there are times that I could not fool anyone – including myself – into believing that I do not miss her.

“Suzy, this is like the one I gave you!” I exclaimed as I pointed at the duck plushie in the claw machine. However, when I turned to look at the girl beside me, she was not Suzy.

“I am aware that you’re using me to forget Suzy,” Yu Bi smiled sadly, “But please refrain from reminding me that I’m a rebound.”

I was drunk that night but I was aware that Yu Bi has kissed me. The morning that I had decided to let go of Suzy, I talked to Yu Bi and asked if she would like to go on dates with me, and she answered yes. Ever since then, we had started going to places together but I had always been a failure at hiding who my heart yearned to be with.

“I’m sorry,” I apologized sincerely. I repeated, “I’m really sorry.”

“No. It’s actually my fault too. It was me who confused you with my sudden confession while you’re undergoing a painful love,” Yu Bi retorted, “I should have been prepared in dealing with these kinds of instances.”

“If I’m hurting you so much, you do not need to agree on dating me,” I replied.

“I sincerely wanted to help,” she answered, “You’re still one of my best friends.”

She had her revenge at me calling her Suzy when she smirked and told me with an unwavering gaze, “And besides, I’m not you, Jongsuk. I’m not a quitter.”

When I said nothing, she stuck her tongue out and mumbled, “I’m just kidding. Come on, let’s go see that movie that you want.”

However, I halted her by tugging on her wrist and when she looked at me, I asked her seriously, “Was it wrong for me to quit?”

“Was it wrong for me to kiss you while you’re in a state of confusion?” she questioned back then she smiled as she posted another inquiry, “Would the heart mind if loving is wrong or right?”

I wasn’t able to respond and Yu Bi just left the question like that, unanswered.

I was getting my boxed possessions outside of my unit when I heard someone humming ‘Fix You’ and the sound made me frozen for it was a familiar voice andit was  a special song. Her footsteps echoed and I stared at the empty space in front of me, waiting for it to be filled with a picture I was trying to bury deep in my memories. My breath hitched when I confirmed that it was Suzy who was humming to the song we danced with.

“Hi there,” she smiled once she spotted me. She squinted as she asked, “What’s your name again? Lee Jungkook?”

And that question immediately crushed my hope. I sighed as I corrected her, “I’m Lee Jongsuk.”

“Sorry,” she mumbled apologetically. She then eyed the boxes that were in front of my door and the one that I was holding. She probed, “What’s with the boxes?”

I let silence occupy time before I answered, “I’m moving.”

“Why? Is there something wrong with your unit?” Suzy continued on asking.

“Yes, because it is beside yours”, I wanted to answer. “You who had come like a storm, leaving me in a state of devastation.”

But I swallowed all the words and instead, said, “It’s my step one in trying to begin again.”

Suzy smiled sweetly at me – the kind of smile I fell for – as she replied, “Then, I wish you good life.”

I was supposed to be happy for her blessing but her approval of my plan to leave affirmed my insignificance for her right now.

I cursed myself inwardly. I should have done better in avoiding her.

“How is it?” I asked my friends as I welcomed them in the apartment I was planning to live at.

“Cozy enough,” Woo Bin replied as he sat on the couch. He looked around as he remarked, “This is smaller than the other one though.”

“It’s cheaper, that’s why,” I shrugged, “Just some cleaning and I could transfer all my things, don’t you think so?”

Woo Bin nodded, “We could help you if you want.”

“Thanks,” I beamed.

“Something’s missing with this apartment though,” Sora announced as she creased her eyebrows.

“What is it?” I curiously asked.

Sora met my gaze as she answered, “Your heart is not here.”

I sighed when Woo Bin added, “He must have left it with Bae Suzy back there.”

“Seriously?” I groaned as I scratched the back of my neck.

“Is this really what you want, Jongsuk?” Yu Bi seriously questioned.

I looked at her and asked back, “You too? You’re discouraging me from moving on too?”

She shrugged and gave a small smile. It was Sora who stated, “We are not discouraging you from moving on. We are discouraging you from giving up on pursuing the one who makes you happy.”

“Loving Suzy is not that simple. You know her case,” I argued. “I don’t know how long I would last with that kind of relationship and if I allow myself to stay with her longer, the pain would just grow more and more.”

“You’ve been nothing but empty these past few days, Lee Jongsuk. Admit it,” Woo Bin uttered.

“Hyung,” I called Woo Bin. “You’re the one who told me that this love would just feel unrequited.”

I wanted them to tell me to stop all the hopefulness raging inside my heart. I wanted them to kill the fire of love I have for Suzy, not to kindle them.

Instead of answering, Woo Bin asked me, “Yes. That’s true but is the pain not worth it anymore?”

“But I could have better options. Maybe I could find the kind of love that would not be as painful as this,” I retorted. “Maybe this new life could make me forget about her. Maybe this new life could bring someone new too – and perhaps a new beginning for a love less… complicated.”

“Yu Bi,” I turned to the short-haired girl with an exasperated look in my eyes as I looked for an ally. I reminded her, “You told me that I deserve better, right?”

“I told you to look for the love that you deserve,” Yu Bi whispered earnestly. I could see the sincerity in her eyes as she added, “Jongsuk, the love that we all deserve is not one which would not hurt us but one which we would be willing to fight for despite all the pain.”

“You told me that you’re not a quitter,” I retorted. “Why are you pushing me away, then?”

“I’m not pushing you away. I’m trying to make you go back to where you really belong,” Yu Bi argued back. “And I... I think I tried but failed and would continue on failing if you would not properly sort out your feelings.”

“Wait. Is there something that’s going on between the two of you that Woo Bin and I do not know about?” Sora interjected.

“Certainly not one that we should be nosy about,” Woo Bin glared at Sora before looking back at me, “So what’s your decision?”

I looked at the unit I had lived on for months – the unit next to Suzy’s. It was neat but because it was nearly empty and I was leaving. I sighed as I pulled at the strap of the bag that contained my clothes. With a final glance, I locked the door behind me.

I had come to my final decision. I was ready to start a new life.

I took slow steps, trying to remember the path that I had been taking. This would be the last time that my feet would crash onto this pavement and I let my steps linger for a short while. The street was illuminated by the lights that came from the street lamp and the houses. My eyes kept wandering around, trying to preservethe scenery into my mind. Despite the heart breaking memories, it was still a place that I considered home. Unknowingly, I was humming ‘Fix You’ and when I realized it, I stopped for the song had become one tainted with my memory with her. I bit my lower lip as I kicked the dirt underground, trying to distract myself from thinking that I haven’t seen Suzy for long. But I knew that saying goodbye to her would just destroy what is left of me.

I was near the stop when the bus arrived and if I had run, I had good chances of catching it. However, the figure that came down from the bus had disorganized my thoughts. She was walking towards my direction and she only noticed my presence when I was only a few steps away from her. Her gaze met mine and I couldn’t move for we stared into each other’s eyes, as if the whole universe were in our orbs. The bus had left but I wasn’t able to take a step further.

Suzy always had this effect – she would make time frozen still.

“You’re leaving tonight?” she broke the silence between the two of us.

“Yes,” I managed to answer.

“I guess it would be difficult for us to see each other again,” Suzy beamed and I thought that it was sadness that was reflected on her lips or perhaps, that was another wishful thinking of mine.

“I’m not really good at saying goodbyes,” she said when I only stared at he