Commutation
Tao had been kind, just so kind. He had taken him on a trip all over the world. He showed all those great places. Europe, America, Africa, literally everywhere. The pleaces, the people, the food. Kris couldn't help it, but he looked at it with new-born eyes, new-born interest, new-born curiousity. As a writer himself, he had been to all places as well before, but it wasn't the same as it was now with Tao. Under Tao's lead, he actually got the chance to become one with the people in those cities. He learned much more about those people, since Tao brought them all together, Tao brought them so close. But somehow, Tao didn't allow him to take any pictures, he didn't allow him to write anything down. Kris thought multiple times that he would forget all about it, if he didn't write it down, so Tao used that as a excuse to buy small gifts for Kris in every capital city they were at. In Amsterdam had Tao bought him a fake tullip, in France he bought him a miniature of the Eiffel tower and other small things from other cities. Kris mostly managed to mutter some words which weren't strong enough to sound like actual words, so he also started to hit Tao from time to time when he felt like he couldn't accept Tao's small gifts any longer, but Tao always smiled anyway. It was untill one day, they were in Port Louis in Mauritius and Tao took Kris his hands in his and they stared into each others eyes. It was one of those rare moments in which Kris had trouble breathing, in which his heart skipped a lot of beats, where he had a fluttering feeling in his stomach. It were those simple words which made Kris realize he couldn't change Tao's mind, which made him realize that he didn't want to change Tao's mind. "Your eyes tell me that you like it." And from that moment on, Kris started to focus more on the look in his eyes. The sparkle in his eyes thanks to excitement, the lights when he was happy, the tears or emptiness when he was sad or even the fire when he was mad at Tao from time to time, everything got a new meaning for Kris and he felt, alive. He hadn't felt like that ever since he lost his voice or even his will to speak. And Tao brought his life back into his heart, he wanted to speak to Tao, even if he couldn't say it with his voice. Of course, Kris also learned sign language, but Tao and told him not to use it untill they would be back into their house, back in China, just so the moment they were sharing at this journey wouldn't get destroyed. Tao wanted to keep the magic between them and what else could he do, aside of agreeing with everything that Tao said and did?

Captivation
He found himself safe in Tao's arms. They were sitting on Maui beach. He leaned against Tao's chest with his back, their arms intertwined over Kris his chest and they enjoyed the view. There were a lot of people, so they weren't outstanding there or anything, so they enjoyed their time off. "One day I want to live here." Said Tao and Kris turned his head a little, eyeing Tao with questions in his eyes and it earned him one of Tao's everlasting smiles. "It's beautiful don't you think? And the weather is nice. And the culture is so different from our own. I think it would be fun and interesting to live here. And when the day's get to boring and look to much like the other day's, then I want to leave again. On towards a different city, a new place. Start all over again there. My life would actually be as our trip is. The only difference is, I would stay at those places longer." Tao then turned his head as well, their lips just a few inches away from each other and Kris swallowed heavily. On moments like this he wished that he could read Tao's mind, that he had enough courage to kiss the other, he wished that Tao would kiss him. Were they friends? Brothers? More? Or just so close that everything was okay, without anything behind it? Well.. he couldn't get his mind to it and he wished that Tao would give more clues. Kris had realized that Tao became a whole different person on their trip. He was more outgoing, he touched people, he was so close to everyone, while back at home, he was only there with Kris, as if he didn't had any friends to take care for. A hit against his head made Kris frown in disagreement and he hit Tao back against his shoulder, hard, leaving a mark from his palm. Tao laughed brightly and Kris couldn't help but to smile as well, after all, Tao always made him smile even if he was angry. "That's unfair Kris. I hit you because you weren't paying attention to me. I saw that dreamy look in your eyes, you were drifting off and not here with me." Kris smiled innocently and apologizing to Tao and he earned a wink from the other thanks to that. "Let's go Kris. It's time to get our stuff together and to go home." Tao said and he got up, gracefull like a cat, even with Kris still in his arms so Kris didn't had any chance to get up on his own. He looked down to their intertwined fingers and before he knew it, started Tao to pull him along, away from the little spot where they had been sitting on for the past few hours, the past few day's they had spend of their holiday together.

Cipher
They found themselves months later again on the couch, together. Tao had pulled Kris on his lap and leaned with his chin on Kris his shoulder. Kris looked down to their hands, while mindlessly playing with Tao's fingers and he frowned his eyebrows a little, deep in thoughts. "What are you thinking?" Asked Tao him and he shook his head, he couldn't find the right words to ask Tao. "You know you can tell me everything." and he looked up, his eyes meeting Tao's. But he saw something different in Tao's eyes, something distant, something he didn't understand. He turned his head away and leaned forward, without moving off Tao's lap and he took a pen and a little notebook from the table. "Don't you have friends?" he wrote down and Tao answere him immediately. "I do." "Then why are you with me?" "Why? don't you want me to be with you?" And he sighed without any sound and rolled with his eyes, a chuckle escaped from Tao's throat and he smiled thanks to it. "Because I like being around you. My friends understand, no worries. On those day's when you lock yourself in your room I actually go out to meet up with them, so they see me on a regular base. So it's okay to me and to them. They tease me that I secretly married you on our trip anyway. They said that we used that trip as a excuse to go to honeymoon to actually." Tao ruffled his hair and Kris looked at him. "And I don't mind it." Tao winked at him and before he knew it, he found himself away from Tao's lap and he watched Tao walk to his room. Sometimes he really didn't get what went through Tao's mind and this was one of them. He became close enough to Tao to be able to tell that Tao was sad about something, but he couldn't put his finger on what exactly. He turned his head down to his lap, turning the pages of the little notebook and he clicked on his pen once again as he started to write down his words on the paper. His mind changed about the story which he was supposed to write and finish a year ago, earning him to get kicked out of the company from his publisher, but Tao really catched him well. Tao said that everything would be okay, that he would take care about all bills and everything and Kris trusted him. Even though they never talked about the work Tao did, about the job Tao had, Kris somehow never managed to get a grip on the other about that subject.

Dissolution
Kris turned his head to look at the drip which was attached onto his arm. His head leaned on a soft pillow as he looked to the drip. The tears slowly rolled out of his eyes. He knew that this was coming, he knew that this was part of his future, he had seen this coming. He never planned on getting close to anyone ever since he knew he would die thanks to the cancer in his body. The cancer started when he was young, about sixteen years, it hit his throat, but it seemed so innocent, so the doctors didn't remove it, afraid that they would damage more then fixing anything. It was twenty when it suddenly became bad and within one year it hit his vocal chors, causing him to lose his voice and the cancer went down to his lungs, made it's way to his heart, in no time he got the lable attached to himself that he couldn't be saved. It was just a matter of time for him to go. He became a writer so he could do something with the time he had left.. he distanced himself from his friends and family untill they were all a vague memory, yet he just had to come into his life. He had to interrupt and make his way into Kris his his heart and mind. And Kris couldn't help it, but he missed the younger man who changed his life dramatically. He missed the man who made him want to live again. And it was his wish, just his final wish, to see the man that he started to love with all of his heart, one last time, before his time would end. Another tear dropped onto his soaked wet pillow, filled with the silent tears as he watched the IV. His heart beated slowly, almost painfully slow, the mask over his mouth helped him gain more oxygen now that his lungs were to weak to work on their own, his arms and legs became to heavy for his body so he couldn't move at all any longer and all what was left for him was to wait, untill death would finally welcome him in his arms. He only hoped, that he only would have one last chance to see Tao, before his body would give up. In silence he always prayed to Death to wait a little longer, that he wanted to see Tao so badly.. that he was willing to suffer longer just so he could see him. And Death, patient as always, watched Kris fight against his own body, a silent battle which should have been given up long ago.