Inspired by INFINITE's Love Letter.

Prompt by: infiniterainbow

At first, the sight of your back was so pretty

I have fallen for you at some point

It’s probably not the first time he’s seen Sungjong. He’s sure he has seen him before, at music shows or variety shows. But this is the first time he really, truly sees him. And he has Sunggyu to thank for that.

After being on a variety show together, Jonghyun has become close with Sunggyu. It’s a good thing because otherwise, the leader of INFINITE would have never invited him to his apartment. He isn’t the only guest though – Minho and Kyuhyun arrive about five minutes later.

Sunggyu introduces them to Hoya and Dongwoo, who live in the same apartment as him. After chatting for a bit, they decide to watch a DVD.

“Oh, the DVD player is upstairs,” Sunggyu tells them. He explains how the rest of the members live in another apartment a few floors up. They follow him to the other apartment.

It has the same design as Sunggyu’s, except there is a large flat screen TV adorning the wall of the living room. Without further ado, they set up the DVD and soon, they are watching a hilarious movie. They must have gotten a bit too excited – the soju bottles keep getting emptier – and that’s when he sees him.

At first, he’s just a voice. A loud, disgruntled voice but Jonghyun thinks it sounds healing.

“Hyung, what the hell are you doing so late-oh-” The maknae of INFINITE stops in his tracks. Clearly, he wasn’t expecting so many unknown people. “Right-uh, I’ll be in my room.” With that, he turns around and walks away.

Jonghyun is a little dazed because the sight of Sungjong, turned away from him, causes his heartbeat to quicken for a few seconds. He feels a little something, something different.

So I just started talking to you without knowing
 

After the movie ends, Sunggyu introduces the rest of s to them formally. Jonghyun has been waiting for this. He’s been exceptionally fidgety during the last one hour of the movie, giving up on drinking and only thinking about the image of Sungjong’s back. How has he never noticed such an alluring figure, the thin waist, and the generous ?

After a low bow, Sungjong speaks with them, a few perfunctory words, before he is ready to retreat to his room but Jonghyun stops him. Stepping in front of him, he starts a conversation. Granted, he starts it lamely, asking about where he buys his shoes, but he’s proud that it works.

He keeps on talking because he knows the younger will leave the moment he stops, so he lets his tongue roll, until he doesn’t know what he’s saying. He’s a bit drunk from the soju earlier and blushing, he realises that he is making no sense at all.

I tried not to show it but I hoped you would smile

Maybe I was too greedy

Sungjong smiles at him. It’s a dazzling smile and Jonghyun thinks he’ll never be the same again. Something within him is rearranged so that he feels like a whole new person. Scratching his head a little, he tries his hand at another joke, hoping Sungjong would smile his scintillating smile again.

His heart trembles when Sungjong laughs – a flash of brilliant white teeth – he pledges himself to the younger in his head. He can picture confetti falling from the sky every time Sungjong smiles, like a scene out of a movie. That’s the kind of smile only angels have.

“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” he blurts out before he can stop himself. He curses the internet message board where he saw it.

One thing is for sure – he’s never felt this way before. This longing, this urge to please – it’s all new for him.

Sungjong gives him a strange look before bowing politely and walking away. His heart may or may not have stopped for a moment.

Oh baby it can’t be over like this
I couldn’t tell you my trembling heart
 

So I wrote my heart in a letter
So I can tell you how I feel
 

Maybe it’s the romantic in him that wants to write a letter. A love letter. It will be his first. He’s never thought about appealing to someone with a love letter, but that turns out to be his option.

He’s met Sungjong a few times after that. At music shows and variety shows. Once, he went to their flat under the pretence of seeing Sunggyu.

It has become plenty clear from their interactions that he cannot bring himself to confess to him. It’s just too much for him to speak the words while Sungjong watches him fidgeting with his doe eyes. And if he doesn’t confess soon, he will go crazy for sure.

Because he’s the only thing he thinks about all the time. It’s not an exaggeration to say that he has no other thought. Several times, people around him have complained how absentminded he has become. That is because in his mind he is in Paris with Sungjong, kissing under a starry sky.

His heart makes a wild leap at the thought of kissing the younger. It’s the strangest feeling ever. How can he like someone so much? It’s like his heart is going to explode.

Nothing can stop him from feeling this way.

Scrunching up the paper he is writing on, he throws it towards the wall, where it lands with a pile of scrunched up papers, all attempts at explaining his feelings. He wishes he could have written a confession song but the thought of singing in front of Sungjong makes his muscles seize up.

The things he does to Jonghyun…

I can’t fall asleep tonight
So I light a candle in this dark room
 

He spends another sleepless night trying to gather his thoughts. It will be the third day he’s trying to write the letter. How hard is to fill a piece of blank paper? His mind with bursting with thoughts, but honestly, the only thing he can write repeatedly is, ‘I really like you.’

For some reason though, that seems insincere. So instead, he tries to use fancy words, but they sound so fake that he can’t help but cross them out.

If this continues, he will lose him for sure. Because how long would Sungjong remain single? Surely, he must be proposed to a lot. He will find someone worthy of him, wouldn’t he?

No, it can’t be over like this.

So he turns of the lights in his room, lights a candle, and gathers his feelings to put on paper. He thinks about the most important thing – he has to be honest. Sungjong has to be able to feel his sincerity through the letter. Everyone writes love letters, why is he finding it so difficult?

Maybe it’s because he’s worried about what’s at stake. If Sungjong doesn’t like the letter, he will reject him. And if he rejects him, his life is pretty much over. He doesn’t even want to think about it because it feels unreal to him.

Oh baby, I think you’ve already caught me
I can’t stop my trembling heart
 

When he next meets Sungjong, he still hasn’t finished the letter. He has the first line jotted down though – ‘To be honest, I fell for you the first time I met you.’

The younger smiles at him a little differently, with a curious glint in his eyes. It’s almost like he knows. He tries to pretend that it’s not true because that would be embarrassing.

They are filming a show and his eyes keep going to him. It’s not something he can control but he is as subtle as possible. Or so he thinks until the younger walks up to him during break and says directly, “You’re staring at me again.”

Again? He’s noticed before?

“I-er-your hairstyle is pretty,” he stutters.

“Oh, that’s all?” He sounds a little disappointed.

“I-er-I-”

Sunggyu calls Sungjong over to look at the script. Jonghyun feels oddly empty as the younger walks away from him. This is not working out.

He makes his mind up.

Grabbing a tissue paper from a stand, he borrows a pen from one of the writers. In big letters, he writes the words – ‘Actually, I really like you.’

Before he can stop himself, he walks over to Sungjong and presents the folded tissue paper to him. He skips away, positioning him at a distance so that he can watch his reaction.

Surprised, the younger opens the fold and reads what’s written. He probably reads it more than once, then raises his head and looks around for him. When their eyes meet, Sungjong smiles sweetly.

He’s pretty sure what the answer is. Otherwise, he's just delusional.

I can’t lose you
I can’t stop, I wanna know