You Knew, I Won't
I Won't Let You Let Me Go
Dongwoo entered Hoya's bedroom and instantly dropped his backpack, not caring that it landed in the middle of the room. "I can't believe I got a 98% on that test. I hate that teacher with every single bone in my body!", Dongwoo's blood was boiling. Disappointment rushed through his veins and he punched the wall. Never had he favored getting anything less than a perfect score and 2% less then the perfect score was still not the perfect score.
Hoya came in and spotted his best friend raging out in the room "It's okay, a 98% is a really good grade.". He got that Dongwoo cared about his grades a lot, but still couldn't understand why someone would get so upset when they still got an A+ while he barely manages some B's or C's. "No it's not. I'm so disappointed in myself.", the latter breathed out. "Hey,", Hoya sneaked his muscular arms around the other's waist, "I think you did great, so stop being upset. I can't stand it when you put yourself down like that.".
These were one of the moments where the elder of the two thought that he actually had a chance with the other, but his brain knew better. Hoya only thought of them as best friends and Dongwoo had came to accept that when he figured out his feelings years ago. He was always contented just being by his side. After years and years of secretly loving the other, Dongwoo finally got the courage to move on. The male had been going on dates for a couple of weeks now, but kept that a secret from Hoya. Somehow, it felt that if Hoya would find out, Dongwoo would feel like he was betraying him, well even more than he did right now.
"Y-Yeah, you're right. Let's just forget about it.", Dongwoo escaped from the latter's arms and sat on the bed. Anymore of being embraced like that and his courage would commit suicide. A part of him knew it was wrong to enjoy it that way, but the other part just wanted to snuggle into the other's broad chest and just stay there forever.
The younger laughed at the elder's little stutter before joining him on his bed, only he decided to sit behind the other. "Do you want to some food? You didn't eat anything at lunch.", Hoya tucked his head into the crook of Dongwoo's neck, smirking. Dongwoo froze at the action before replying "No, I'm going to eat out later.". "Really?", the younger's voice sent shivers down his spine "Are you going to eat out alone? Or with someone?".
Hoya wasn't that dense, he knew that Dongwoo had been going on his little dates for awhile now. It was so amusing to him when he felt the other stiffen at his question. Dongwoo on the other hand, didn't find it so amusing. He was conflicted whether he should lie or not, but then decided that he had nothing to lie about. Even though he did feel the slightest bit guilty, he hadn't done anything wrong. It was time to tell him because he had nothing to hide "I'm going with someone I met the other day.".
"Where did you meet him?", it was too fun and a smirk already made it's way onto his face. He was glad Dongwoo didn't see. "At the convenience store.", Dongwoo tried so hard not to stutter when the other tucked his head in even deeper into the crook of his neck. "So, have you went out with him before?", it felt like an investigation now. "A couple times.", Dongwoo answers truthfully. "Name?", this was definitely an investigation.
"It's not important. Why do want to know anyway?", the elder turned around, causing the other to look at him. "Just because, I care. I want to know if he's a criminal or not.", the smirk was still dancing on his lips and he was pretty sure that if Dongwoo kept acting this way, it would stay there. "Well, he's not a criminal for sure, so you don't have to keep questioning me about him.", the smirk was annoying Dongwoo to no end. It felt like the other was teasing him and he was.
"Fine,", the younger of the two laid down on his bed "how about some Tv? Your favorite drama's on.". "Really?! Where's the remote?!", Hoya chuckled at how Dongwoo was running around his room, frantically searching for the remote that he was hiding under his pillow. "Calm down,", Hoya pulled the other on his bed next to him "it's right here." and took out the remote before turning the Tv on.
"So what happened in the last episode?", Hoya questioned after the drama began to play. "The girl confessed and the guy rejected her. It's so sad, they were best friends until she told him.", Dongwoo shook his head, replaying the scene in his mind. It was like he was looking at himself in the girl's character. How she secretly loved her best friend, but unlike her, Dongwoo had no intention of confessing to his best friend. He didn't want what happened to her, to happen to him.
"Do you think the guy did the right thing?", Hoya asked as he wrapped his arm around Dongwoo's waist. "No, I think he should've let them remain best friends like how they were. It's not fair that he distanced them just because she confessed. He should've thought about how she felt.", Dongwoo tried not to think about how Hoya laid his head on his chest.
"Do you know how she felt?".
"She was probably hurting by herself. Watching him laugh with others while she loved him secretly. She was probably content with being by his side until she couldn't take it anymore and told him. She was in pain all by herself.".
"You sound like you really know how the character felt.", Hoya commented as his arm tightened around the other. "Let's just watch the drama.", Dongwoo took a deep breath. Through the episode, the elder of the two just laid there quietly as the younger made some comments every now and then. He wished it could stay like this forever. Just him and the other, laying down with the other's arm around his waist, and head on his chest. How secured he felt in the other's tight hold, and the warmth that the other was giving him, he wanted to experience it for eternity.
Hoya wasn't really fond that Dongwoo was going even more now since he told him about his dates. It seems like everyday they would hangout, the elder had to leave to meet with someone else, and that irked him to no end. He really thought that soon enough, Dongwoo would stop going out on his petty little dates, but it's been weeks now and he hasn't. He didn't like it one bit, so he decided to say something about it.
"Not going on another date with another freak today?", the younger asked as they were laying on the floor in his room like any other day watching a show. "No, and they're not freaks.", Dongwoo replied. "Well I prefer to think that they are.", Hoya responded. "What is with you today? You've been in a crappy mood all week.", Dongwoo got up on his feet and Hoya soon followed after turning off the Tv. "I haven't been in a crappy mood, just something's been bothering me.", the younger sighed.
"Like what?".
"Like you and those stupid dates you keep going on.".
"What? Why?".
"Just because, I don't know. ", the younger shrugged. "You heard me though, so stop going out with so many people.".
Dongwoo didn't think he heard right, but he was absolutely sure that he did. It made no sense though. It sounded like Hoya was jealous, but that couldn't be. The other made it clear that he had no interest. "Why do you care? I like meeting new people. What's wrong with that?". "I just don't like it. Plus, what happened to your feelings for me? Did they just disappear into thin air?", so Hoya finally brought it up.
Hoya knew, all this time he was well aware of the other's feelings. Still, he had chosen to ignore it. "Does that even matter to you?", the elder questioned. He knew Hoya knew how he felt, so he wasn't surprised. "It does.", Hoya closed the space between them. Dongwoo knew it was a lie. Hoya never cared about him, at least not in that way. "You're lying.". "But I'm not. I care, so stop going out.", the latter sighed.
"No, I'm not going to stop having fun just because you said so. That's not a good enough reason.", Dongwoo stepped backwards, creating distance between them. How dare Hoya say that to him?! He had no right! Dongwoo was finally moving on and now of all times he says this! "A good enough reason? Okay, how about if I said I didn't want you to.", Hoya closed the distance between them again. However this time, he wrapped an arm around the other, not wanting him to move away again.
"You can't just say that after all this time! I'm finally ready to move on and you just-", Hoya cut the elder off "I don't want you to move on.". "This is what I'm talking about. You can't just say things like that!", the eldest male shook his head. "Why not? Why can't I? I don't want you to move on.", maybe Hoya wasn't sure that he actually wanted Dongwoo in a loving way, but he knew he didn't want the other to go on anymore dates with strangers and forget about him. Seeing Dongwoo smile when he came to him after returning from a date made him want to murder a person. He hated it, how Dongwoo looked so happy. He enjoyed it more when Dongwoo used to only have that bright smile when looking at him. That smile was only for him, so in a way, Hoya thought it was his.
"You can't say that when I'm finally moving on, when I'm finally letting you go. You knew all this time, but you chose to ignore it and that only made it hurt so much more.".
"Please, I want you to stay because......I want you.".
Dongwoo's heart swelled at the other's words, but his brain knew better than to believe it. "You don't mean that. You only want me because you're afraid that I won't be at your beck and call like I used to be. That I won't shower you with affection in my secret ways like I had. Well, I'm sick of that. It's too hard doing that. I want to let you go now.", no matter how much Dongwoo tried to break free from the other, the other's arms encircling his waist were too strong to break off .
Amazement couldn't even describe how Hoya felt when Dongwoo said those words. It was like he actually put how Hoya felt in words. The eldest was right, he hit the nail right on the head. "You're right, those reasons are exactly why.". It seemed impossible, but his grip got even tighter around the elder's waist and that made Dongwoo's heart beat faster, too fast in his opinion.
Hoya leaned in before whispering against the other's ear "I don't like it when a pet strays from it's owner.". He said exactly how he felt and meant every word that came out from his mouth. It didn't come very well to him that Dongwoo was out with other's. In a way, it did feel like Dongwoo was his pet and like he said, he doesn't like it when a pet strays from it's owner. Hearing the words, Dongwoo's eyes widened "I'm not your pet.". He tried to push the other away, but to no avail "Let me go!".
"No, and you're not going to be able to move on either, I won't let you.", a smirk placed itself on his lips as he picked Dongwoo up and threw him on the bed. Dongwoo could swear his heart was about to explode in his chest. The look the other was giving him terrified him. He didn't like this Hoya. He wanted his best friend back, but it didn't look like Hoya would switch his personality back anytime soon.
Hoya found the look in his best friend's eyes so entertaining and fascinating. The look of nervousness and fear that clouded Dongwoo's eyes made him feel so pleased. Even his heart thought so as it beat quicker and heavier. He loved this feeling, it was almost so satisfying, almost, but not enough. So, he took off his shirt and climbed on the bed after an idea made it's appearance in his mind.
Seeing the mischievous gleam in the other's eye and how the other seemed to be climbing over him while being shirtless, he had to swallow a lump that formed in his throat. Hoya placed an arm on each sides of his head, trapping him. The latter looked at him in the eye and he knew Hoya had something in mind that was bound to give him a heart attack as he leaned down and whispered in his ears with a husky voice.
"I won't let you let me go.".
A/N: Thank you for reading and hopefully you enjoyed it. I'll update every week. I just wrote a Hunhan story so you take an interest, check it out. I'll update both each week.
-Wanderer_11
Broken Smile
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