AN: Sorry I've been away an entire semester! Six classes. Wanted to die. Haven't forgotten about this story. Only one class this semester, expect more updates! <3

******

 Seohyun was the first member to arrive, politely bowing to their manager, CEO, as well as a few other studio heads before taking a seat at an SM conference table. She nervously placed her hands on her lap, engaging their manager in polite small talk.

     Sooyoung arrived next, smiling and bowing to everyone before sitting next to Seohyun, who immediately started an animated conversation with her. Sooyoung reciprocated, but could feel Seohyun’s nerves in every word she said. This in turn made Sooyoung a little nervous for the baby of the group, how would she react to whatever went down today? She knew she had to be strong in her resolve and feelings about the situation, but still worried about upsetting Seohyun.

    Taeyeon and Tiffany came next, with very brief and polite acknowledgments. Taeyeon looked less than thrilled, like a child unwillingly dragged to a funeral. She didn’t look at anyone, and sat across from Sooyoung and Seohyun, with Tiffany following suit. “Sunny and Hyoyeon will be here shortly,” Tiffany informed the gathering. “Someone had a bit of a rough night last night,”

    Taeyeon winced as she felt the curious and worried looks from Soo and Seo. Indeed, someone -did- have a rough night last night, as Taeyeon woke up this morning to find Hyoyeon on the floor of their dorm, passed out in last night’s party clothes. She had gotten her a glass of water and tried, with help from Tiffany and Sunny to get her up, but Hyoyeon had ignored them. Sunny had decided to handle it on her own whilst Tiffany and Taeyeon got ready and informed the others that they might be a little late. When Taeyeon and Tiffany left, they saw a very determined Sunny drag Hyoyeon to the shower. If anybody could handle it, Sunny could.

     Yoona came next, with Yuri close behind, both choosing to sit on Sooyoung’s side.They quickly smiled at everyone there and then reverted back to solemn expressions of reluctance. Unlike Sooyoung and Seohyun, & Tiffany attempting to engage Taeyeon, the pair decided not to talk at all.  

    Finally, about a half hour late, Sunny arrived, with a Hyoyeon in shades leaning slightly on her shoulder. “Sorry we’re late!” Sunny chirped, attempting to be bright as she gently led Hyoyeon to Tiffany and Taeyeon’s side and sat down. “Preparations were a bit difficult this morning, but I got us here.” Poor Sunny, Yoona couldn’t help but think to herself, feeling ominous about Sunny’s positivity already after this meeting.

    “Good morning, ladies.” Their manager finally spoke after a few moments of silence. “Are you ready for Shenzhen?”

     “Yes,” Sooyoung replied, almost adding “aside from Jessica” but she, along with everyone else, seemed hesitant to say anything that would delve into the real purpose of this meeting.

    Their manager, however, was not at all reluctant. “Good,” He nodded approvingly. “Now, as for a certain someone who isn’t ready...again...shall we begin discussion about that?”

***

     What the hell? Jessica thought to herself, staring at her phone. Tiffany had said she’d text her a confirmation; ensuring that they were going to meet at the dorm early tomorrow morning to leave for Shenzhen. Yet she had heard nothing, and she’d have to shut off her phone soon while she flew back home. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, Tiffany was pretty good about being a figurative manager to the girls, she rarely forgot to remind everyone things.

    As she adjusted her wig, a tall, slender teenage boy appeared by her seat, crouching down to better see her. “Excuse me,” He whispered. “Are you Jessica from SNSD?”

    She looked at him, startled. She was wearing sunglasses and a wig and yet she remembered that when this tall boy passed her on the plane, his eyes widened and his mouth dropped open in recognition. How could he tell?

    She then guiltily remembered that she had briefly taken her sunglasses off to wipe a lash out of her eye, when he passed by. Oh.

  “You caught me.” She whispered sheepishly in a lower tone and offered a small polite smile. “Please don’t draw attention to me.”

 “Oh my god I knew it!” He gasped excitedly as Jessica wildly looked around before giving him a light ‘shhh!’. He quickly recovered and nodded, straightening himself up. “Sorry,” He whispered. “I won’t ask for pics, but can you sign my hat?” He handed her his snapback with a hopeful look on his face.

She was on edge and admitted to herself that she couldn’t say no to that face. She smiled, nodded, and quickly signed it for him with a whisper to please continue supporting Girl’s Generation. He thanked her, slowly held the snapback to his chest, and walked away with a face that said he had such an amazing day, that he could scarcely believe it himself. She waited five more seconds and heard a slight squee. She chuckled to herself, she couldn’t help but always be amused by those types of reactions.

Actually, she was grateful for them. Her squad was so tight and impressive that people were excited, sometimes emotional or breathless, to meet a member from it. It was a warm feeling to meet fans, and know that she could make someone’s day just by signing something for someone. It was feelings like these, feelings of satisfaction, feelings of love, that kept her tied to Girls’ Generation.

It was feelings like those that clashed with her career woman intentions, though. At the same time, she felt her productivity and determination brought something to the group. She and Tiffany were pretty good at organizing things. So was Taeyeon...despite their tensions. She just needed to figure out how to balance two very different passions. She could do that, right?

In any event, she thought to herself, putting her headphones in as the plane took off. I’m worrying too much. Nothing is wrong. If there was a big problem, they would tell me. Just get home, touch base with the girls, and go to Shenzhen.

***

“I’ve sort of been in contact with Jessica while she is away,” Tiffany started, looking around the room, as none of the other members seemed to want to talk first. “She should be on her way back now.”

“I see,” Their manager folded his hands and stretched out his arms. “And none of you knew she was leaving?”

“No, we didn’t.” Taeyeon spoke up. “She also has been struggling with responding to members, including Tiffany, in a timely manner.”

“I also find it an issue that she didn’t let our manager know she was going.” Sooyoung interjected, to the surprise of a few other members. “I mean, maybe she forgot to tell us, but we never forget to inform our manager when we do something that may conflict with our schedules.”

“I’m honestly still sort of offended about that,” Yuri said grudgingly, not looking anyone in the eye. “We’re all friends. Why not tell us?”

“Telling us is a -basic- courtesy, Yuri.” Taeyeon turned toward her. “Girls’ Generation is above basic. Why not -ask- us? Why not value the opinions of other members? With her fashion line, her schedule, and other matters, Jessica has always laid down the law in terms for her of how it’s going to be and we’re not allowed to say anything against it. I don’t know if Jessica thinks she’s -above- Girls’ Generation, but either way, I’m sick of it.” She crossed her arms, her cheeks tinging as she inhaled.

The room was silent. This was honestly the most Taeyeon had -ever- said on how she felt about Jessica. Not only that, it was the most outward Taeyeon had ever been about anything that made her angry on a subject where the other girls might not feel similarly.

“I...never knew it bothered you so much,” Yuri admitted.

Taeyeon nodded and then tilted her head at Yuri. “It doesn’t bother you?”

“A little,” Yuri agreed hesitantly. “But I love Jessica.”

“I think we all love Jessica,” Sunny finally offered some input. “Even when she’s frustrating. I think despite all of these things, she is our ice princess, and I don’t think kicking her out is a good idea.”

The tension in the room could be sliced with a knife, first Taeyeon was so outward, and then Sunny immediately after. Sunny looked at Taeyeon and raised her head, inviting her to speak again.

“It...it’s not like I want to kick Jessica out,” Taeyeon faltered, looking as though Sunny had insulted her. “I just think she’s falling through in terms of commitment and shows no signs of improvement.”

“So you’re suggesting we kick her out,” Sunny wasted no time firing back at Taeyeon.

“I- I’m suggesting we do what’s best to maintain our ‘Asia’s Number One Girl Group’ status, even if it means kicking Jessica out, who seems to lack appreciation for it.”

“You keep bringing up the same points on how she’s lazy or inconsiderate.” Sunny was on the verge of standing up, getting her points across as fast as she could. “How about when Jessica danced her off night and day in the beginning, and got all those disgusting blisters on her feet because she wanted to be perfect? How about when she was inconsolable the first time she had to miss an SNSD performance? Does that sound lazy or inconsiderate to you?”

Tiffany looked nervously between her friends. “Hey..guys, that’s eno-.”

“Sunny, that’s enough.” Sooyoung spoke up sharply, stopping the lightning round. Everyone paused and turned to her. “Don’t ignore what Taeyeon is saying out of our love for our friend. Even though she is our friend, that doesn’t make her a quality team member. Especially as of late. You, might I add, were complaining about a week ago about how Jessica never seemed to want to spend time with us anymore.”

“That was more of a boyfriend thing!” Sunny exclaimed. “I was jealous that she’s in the honeymoon phase!”

“Taeyeon and Tiffany are dating other people, and yet they’re around.” Yoona argued. “I’m in a relationship, Sooyoung’s in a relationship, and the two of us are around.”

Sunny noted in her mind that Yoona did not bring up Hyoyeon’s availability in her previous relationship. She knew that she could effectively turn the conversation in her favor by bringing Hyoyeon’s recent behavior, as well as how she behaved in her previous relationship, and make Jessica look like less of an issue. She placed her hand on Hyoyeon’s shoulder, and glanced concerned at her friend. Hyoyeon looked back at her briefly, wide-eyed, like a nervous child. Sunny sighed and knew she was a friend first and foremost, to both Hyoyeon and Jessica. She stayed quiet.

“The point is, Jessica’s recent disregard has been wearing us down, and bringing down our mood. Do we really wanna stay at this point? It’s time to move on. I think we should keep Jessica as a friend, but not as a member.”

“We should try talking to Jessica first,” Tiffany anxiously tried to defend her bandmate. “See if we can get her to get her act together…”

Taeyeon snorted next to her, and gave her a look. “Didn’t we already try that?”

“Well…” Tiffany trailed off. You mean, -I- technically tried that. Tiffany thought shrewdly. -You- refused to talk to her directly.

“It didn’t work, remember?” Taeyeon frowned and crossed her arms. “It’s not going to.”

Tiffany nodded grudgingly, scowling in her mind. It did not work, because Jessica knew Tiffany didn’t have any grievances with her. It did not work, because Jessica could tell they were Taeyeon’s grievances delivered through Tiffany. And it really did not work because Jessica refused to take them seriously when Taeyeon did not communicate them herself.

It also may not have worked because phrased them so lightly. Tiffany thought, chiding herself for not being more upfront. Maybe if I better communicated Taeng’s feelings, Jessica wouldn’t have brushed them off so lightly.

“Jessica’s voice is what makes our dynamic so unique!” Sunny piped up frantically.

Taeyeon’s eyebrows narrowed. “I beg your pardon?”

Sunny stopped in a horrified realization of her implications. “I meant to say,” She backtracked. “She-she’s part of it.”

“Are we not a quality group? Would we fall to shambles without her?”

    Taeyeon sighed shakily, trying to calm down. “I’m sorry. I hate this idea that our beautiful group is a Jenga tower and Jessica is the integral piece. I did not sing with all my heart for our group to be so easily destroyed.”

“We are all wonderfully trained,” Seohyun spoke up, looking around at her members. “Everyone is important.”

“So is Jessica.” Hyoyeon finally spoke. “I want to support all of us.”

“But..but what do we do…”

     “When that support is not reciprocated?” Yuri finished Taeyeon’s sentence for her.

There was another brief silence and Seohyun meekly folded her hands upon her lap. “Maybe the best way to support our friend is to let her go.”

Tiffany looked like a deer in headlights, catching the reluctant expressions of agreement. She looked over at Taeyeon, who briefly looked apologetic, then bowed her head and raised her hand. “I move that we continue activities without Jessica.”

“No…” Hyoyeon sat up, removing her sunglasses as she resurfaced to reality. “No, it’s too early to vote…”

“Then do you move to keep Jessica in the group?” Their manager looked over at her.

“I...of course I do!” Hyoyeon pleaded. “I can’t lose my friends...I can’t lose her. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I don’t want to lose her.”

“Hyoyeon…” Yuri bit her lip, her eyes started to water. She lowered her head and quickly added. “I agree with Taeyeon.” She struggled to speak. “Jessica is a dear friend, but I feel like not acknowledging her wrongdoings, is wrong itself.”

The management team shuffled awkwardly, surrounded by young women all going through their own emotional turmoil. Lee Sooman finally spoke up with hesitance. “With three members making their stance very clear, let’s take it to a vote. All in favor of Jessica continuing Girl’s Generation activities?”

Hyoyeon and Sunny’s hands skyrocketed, with Tiffany close behind. Taeyeon looked at Tiffany with wide eyes, then bit her lip as if to say she understood, and looked away.

Lee Sooman acknowledged the three members for a very pregnant minute, and then spoke again. “All in opposition?”

Taeyeon and Yuri’s hands rose first, followed silently and sadly by Seohyun. After thirty seconds, Yoona and Sooyoung exchanged a look of despair and rose their hands.

Lee Sooman sighed and crossed his fingers. “It would seem, we have reached a conclusion.”

Hyoyeon stood up immediately and threw her hands on the table, hurt and shock etched on her face. She threw glances at everyone, then bit her lip, and ran out of the room.

“Hyoyeon, wait!” Yuri rose in a panic as the door slammed, tears flooding down her face. “Please don’t be mad at me!”

“Hyoyeon!” Tiffany ran in pursuit. “Come back!”

Sunny and Sooyoung silently cried. Yoona hid her face in her hands. Seohyun dabbed at her eyes and tried to blink her tears away. Taeyeon hesitantly got up and pulled Sunny into a hug. “I’m sorry...I’m sorry…” She whispered like a broken record.

The management team agreed in low tones to leave them be, as one by one, they silently filed out of the room.

****

Five minutes after Jessica was assured that security and a ride would be awaiting her at her ready, she grabbed her checked luggage. The lack of cameras going off felt slightly strange, but there would be plenty of airport fashion photos in Shenzhen. Of course, I just got off a plane and now I’m going back on one. Cool cool. She sighed and met her to the car.

“Am I late?” She shot a text to Tiffany. “I just landed, I’m sorry! I’ll be there in a pinch and buy everyone dinner tonight! Loads to tell you all <3”

“I bought everyone gifts,” She texted as five minutes went by with no reply. “So you’ll all forgive me right? =^,^=.”

“Keke...you must be busy rounding up the squad. I’ll meet you all at the dorm and we can leave soon!” She sent her last text within a span of 25 minutes.

As she awaited some form of response, she tapped her foot impatiently. She wanted to get a lot of things over with. The obvious lecture that would come with her brief stint in NY, the next plane flight. But all the same, she was looking forward to Shenzhen, dinner with her members, and girl talks. Fast forward, fast forward! She thought as she tried to reserve and contain her energy for Shenzhen.

She practically bounded out of the car and flew into her apartment, ravaging her drawers open and throwing new clothes in. She slammed her luggage carrier shut, not even closing it all the way and headed en route to the dorm. She couldn’t be late! She had no idea why, but she needed to get there with a strange urgency. These lack of replies were stacking in paranoia. She needed to see them all waiting for her. She would even welcome attitude at this point!

She pushed the elevator buttons impatiently before saying ‘Screw it’ and running up the stairs. As she reached their floor, she tried to calm down. She was overreacting. There was no need to worry. She herself had been delayed in responding to the members before. She breathed and walked in a normal pace to the dorm entrance, and steadying herself, she knocked.

A minute went by. She knocked again.

She knocked every 30 seconds, trembling. “What?” She breathed, starting to panic. Her knocks continued to grow more frequent. “Did they leave without me?!” She near-shrieked, full-on banging on the door. “GIRLS!” Jessica screamed. “IT’S ME! LET ME IN!”

As she entered the verge of tears, she noticed a potted plant she had never seen before. An idea entered her head, and she lifted it to find a key taped underneath. “Too obvious, why?” She thought out loud. “We’re idols. Paparazzi or sasaengs could break in. Is this for Hyoyeon when she parties too late?” She unlocked the door and entered. “Yah!”

She stopped short. The dorm was completely empty and silent. An eerie aura floated throughout, the members were not sitting around in the living room waiting for her, and Jessica uncertainly called out ‘Girls?’

She slowly made her way into the living room, closing the door behind her. “I...I’m sorry if my flight was late. I don’t know if you all left without me, but if not, I’m totally ready…”

She stopped in front of the coffee table.

An envelope lay face up. ‘To: Jessica’

Her breath hitched, and she picked it up.