"Jungmin-?!" Kyujong yelped when he was suddenly dragged by his collar, wincing as he was pinned against the wall.

"Who is he, Kyujong? Who is he really?"

"Who is who-"

"Hyunjoong! Who else could I be talking about?"

Kyujong looked utterly confused, "I... He's one of our newest members, crossed over from the police. I decided to pair the two of you up since well, you had similar agendas- why are you asking me this? He did tell you all this, didn't he? He told me as much last evaluation."

"Really, then tell me why my investigation lead me to him as the killer? Tell me why, when I discovered this fact, he didn't even bother denying it and instead stuck me with a sedative to knock me out?" Jungmin watched as even more confusion crossed Kyujong's face, but Jungmin wasn't convinced. Kyujong was a well-practiced liar. He had to be, in his line of work.

"Jungmin, you have to believe me. I have no idea what's going on. What you just told me... doesn't make any sense."

"Have to believe you?" for some reason, that line made Jungmin far angrier than it should have, his grip on Kyujong's collar tightening, the other man beginning to choke. "Why should I have to believe you?"

"Because he's telling the truth?"

The silence that followed made the soft sound of a gun's safety being taken off as loud as thunder in a library.

"...Hyungjoon." Jungmin acknowledged the other man quietly, grip loosening just a bit so that Kyujong could at least breathe, but not by much.

"Jungmin." Hyungjoon replied genially. "You should probably let Kyujong go."

Jungmin's eyes glanced to the aforementioned man, who stiffened at the look in Jungmin's eyes. "Why should I?"

Hyungjoon sighed, "because I think that right now, you aren't thinking straight and are judging the situation rashly and based purely on emotion. Which is a shame really, because the glowing commendation I got isn't anywhere in sight. Someone would be disappointed in you."

Jungmin paused at that odd phrasing, eyes flashing as he turned to look at Hyungjoon, unphased by the gun pointed at him. "What did you say?"

"I said that someone would be disappointed in you," Hyungjoon reiterated. "He had high hopes for you after all."

Slowly, Jungmin let go of Kyujong's collar, the latter coughing a little, rubbing his throat from where the cloth had chaffed. "...where is he?"

"I don't know."

"That's a bunch of bull crap. Of course you do. You're a secret keeper. You know but you just refuse to tell anyone anything, enjoying confusing others and being all high and mighty, bloody cryptic all the bloody time!" he could feel the look of hurt that was on Kyujong's face from that unfair accusation but was too angry to care.

"...No. I really don't." Hyungjoon replied calmly and damnit, logic was making its way back into Jungmin's mind, because of all the people in the world to tell him that right now, it had to be Hyungjoon. Because as odd as it sounded, Hyungjoon was the most honest secret keeper he'd ever known. Unlike other secret keepers who used lies as a way to keep things from people, Hyungjoon had only ever used his sheer stubbornness to do his job. If he knew something, he wouldn't lie about knowing about it. But pigs would fly first before Hyungjoon would leak information that wasn't supposed to be leaked.

He could feel Kyujong's worried gaze even as he turned to the wall, punching it in sheer frustration. But Hyungjoon didn't seem impressed by that display. He sighed, "the only thing I know is that he's waiting for you to figure it out."

"Figure what out?" Jungmin snapped, looking up, his irritation melting away at Hyungjoon's bland stare, the wheels in his head beginning to turn.

Youngsaeng. Hyunjoong. The watchers. Hyungjoon knowing. No, no. It didn't make any sense. Why did Hyungjoon know Hyunjoong? Why? The secret keepers were supposed to guard secrets about the Watchers and their activities. Know information that was too sensitive for too many people to know and yet was still necessary for the Watchers to function and keep accountable by. But why was Hyunjoong and him being Youngsaeng's killer a secret that had needed to be kept by a secret keeper.

There was one obvious answer, but it was an answer that didn't make sense. An answer that just couldn't be.

"You have everything you need to know to figure it out." Hyungjoon said before he left, leading Kyujong off with him. "And when you're done with that, I'm pretty sure you'll see him again,"

~*~

Hyunjoong looks different: older. If Jungmin had met him looking like this, he'd have never made the mistake of thinking that Hyunjoong was younger.

Jungmin expected this. What he hadn't reckoned was him still recognizing Hyunjoong. This wasn't a stranger that he didn't know. He knew that look in Hyunjoong's eyes, and even if there were a few small differences, Hyunjoong was still Hyunjoong. It was a little disconcerting, and he had to turn away, looking at the floor.

Hyunjoong was obviously waiting for Jungmin to say something. And finally, after a long period of silence, Jungmin did.

"The lover, the secret lover that we found Youngsaeng had, was not only member of the government, but he was also part of the triads. Someone the triads bribed to keep them in the loop and to tweak policies so that it would favour them as well. His name was Kim Jongwoon."

Hyunjoong let out a soft sound that sounded suspiciously like a sigh of relief. "...yes."

Jungmin glanced at Hyunjoong, and whatever he saw there made him turn away again. "It was covered up well. After all, Youngsaeng was an expert in information. He'd done some of the best cover up work I've seen. And so, no one knew when Saeng received an order to kill his own lover."

Jungmin closed his eyes.

"...Youngsaeng couldn't do it. The sap probably thought that maybe if his lover was given a chance, then this Jongwoon guy would... I don't know. Repent, and stop whatever he was doing. So, he decided only to pretend to kill the guy and hid him away instead after making his lover promise to go on the straight and narrow."

"Unfortunately, this Jongwoon guy did something stupid. He got discovered going behind Youngsaeng's back and doing the exact opposite of what he told Youngsaeng. It was an important shipment if drugs. One he couldn't afford not to get if he was planning to get back into the good graces of the triads. But unfortunately, it was also a shipment which the Watchers were keeping watch of. And like any good Watcher, the person who was on the shipment case recognized Jongwoon as someone who should have been dead, did an investigation and when everything checked out, killed Kim Jongwoon himself."

"But Youngsaeng had hid his tracks well, so no one knew of his involvement. And when the investigation came, he made sure everything checked out. No one suspected a thing." Jungmin remembered that investigation. He hadn't thought there had been anything strange then. He'd just teased Youngsaeng for losing his touch. And Youngsaeng hadn't reacted anything out of the ordinary. Jungmin wondered what Youngsaeng had really thought then. "If he'd kept quiet, probably no one would have suspected. But he was angry... Angry with the Watchers. He thought... He thought..."

"....that he could have changed Jongwoon if he just had a few more chances." Hyunjoong supplied quietly.

"Yeah," Jungmin took a slow breath. "That. So... He started up a plan to expose the Watchers. He talked to some people, set up a few things... That night he was killed. It was supposed be some kind of expose. There were agreements: a camera team to be present... And the person that had been the target was actually an innocent - the orders forged by Youngsaeng himself," and Jungmin hadn't even thought to check the orders. He'd trusted Youngsaeng that much.

"Obviously, the Watchers couldn't have that. And that's where you obviously come in." Hyunjoong stiffened when there was a gun in Jungmin's hand pointed straight at him, the soft click of the safety disengaging loud in the dead silence. "But that's the one thing I couldn't find out. Who are you? You're obviously part of the organisation somehow, but the organisation has never condoned death within the ranks. Why didn't Youngsaeng get a fair hearing? Another chance? Who are you that you deemed killing my partner necessary act?"

Hyunjoong looked at Jungmin silently before he let out a small sigh, then chuckled, a small smile crossing his face, looking… oddly proud. He didn’t seemed too concerned about the gun pointed at him by one of the most accurate shooters alive right then.

“I’m an auditor.”

It took a while for it to sink in that Hyunjoong had spoken. “An auditor?”

“Yeah. While the Watchers watch the rest of the world, there needs to be someone to watch the Watchers, otherwise there would be disaster." Hyunjoong bit his lip, rubbing his neck. He seemed, nervous, for some reason. "The Watchers are, if you think about it, the most powerful people in the world. They answer to no one. They judge the visible leaders of the world. And that's where the auditors step in. We keep the Watchers in line, making sure that the organisation doesn't become corrupt from within."

"Wait. I don't understand. You're an external force?"

"No, no." Hyunjoong shook head. "We're sort of like the exactly opposite. Internal affairs? We take up cases and reports of anything irregular with any agent and investigate. And then, according to our discretion, we bring whatever wrong to justice as we deem right."

"...In order words, you're not only the investigators... but also the judges." Just saying it didn't sit well with Jungmin at all, and his grip on his gun tightened.

Hyunjoong sighed at that. "Yes, well. The criteria for becoming an auditor is even more stringent than that of an auditor's. And... well, we still have to write out reports... plus, there are measures to keep us in place. But... all this... is about the case with your partner. So, let's stop beating around the bush, shall we?"

A part of Jungmin's mind was curious, wanting to know exactly what measures would keep a power higher than the Watchers in place. But he pushed that curiosity aside. Contrary to popular belief, he did have his priorities straight.

"You were right." Hyunjoong shrugged after a moment. "I was dispatched to investigate murmurings about the Watchers appearing where they shouldn't have. And you know how the organisation is with that. It took... a lot of favours and long hours but I managed by sheer luck to trace the source to Youngsaeng. It made sense, because, after all, the information that was being leaked could have only come from someone on the inside."

'Sheer luck, my .' Jungmin wanted to say. Youngsaeng might have been one of the best agents dealing in information, but having watched Hyunjoong as well, Jungmin would grudgingly admit if anyone could uncover Youngsaeng's trail, it'd have been Hyunjoong.

"Long story short, I found him and confronted him with my evidence. The first time... I gave him a warning. A slap on the wrist. Telling him that it was not too late to stop. That if he did, then I'd report the murmurings as just some coincidence. And we'd just leave it at that."

"Why?" Jungmin interrupted quietly. It sounded... contrary to what Hyunjoong had said earlier. If the Watchers were strict in their hand with the world, then the auditors should be even more strict in their handling with the Watchers, shouldn't they?

"...Because sometimes love makes emotional fools of us. And I understood his anguish." Hyunjoong said quietly. "And as of that time, no damage had been done. If he'd have let it go then, no one would have known."

But there was still confusion on Jungmin's face, and so Hyunjoong explained quietly. "As auditors... we're mostly free to operate the way we wish. That freedom comes after the stringent selection that we have to pass in order to get our role. But of course, with that freedom, the things we have to answer to should we abuse it is much worse than even that of a Watcher's."

It still didn't sit well with Jungmin, but he let it pass, nodding for Hyunjoong to continue.

"...Youngsaeng... didn't heed my warning. In less than a month, the murmurings were stronger than ever, and... well, I found him again. Found even more incriminating evidence." Hyunjoong looked out of the window, as if remembering put him back there, in the thick of it. "I... gave him another chance. Tried to talk to him, tell him that I could let him go with a minor punishment if he stopped. That... there was no reason for him to do this. His hate was misplaced. People like Jongwoon... if they betrayed Youngsaeng in such a short time, then it wasn't any sort of relapse or anything. It was because Jongwoon saw Youngsaeng as just a tool for his survival - a powerful tool but a tool nonetheless. At that time, he said that I was right, and that he'd stop... and I gave him the benefit of the doubt."

Hyunjoong closed his eyes. "I regret doing so now. Before I knew it, the murmurings had turned to whispers, and then, the agent who had executed Jongwoon got into an 'accident'. Youngsaeng knew by then that I would have come after him. He didn't care. He was on a suicide mission to bring the Watchers down and I knew I had to act fast."

"I... was only planning to bring him in, you know? But that night. Everything went wrong. He acted earlier, as if he'd predicted I'd interfere. Went after the innocent while I was in the middle of disabling all the camera teams." Hyunjoong's lips were pale, Jungmin suddenly noticed, "I didn't have time to think. I went after him and then..."

They both knew what had happened.

"The cleaning teams cleared it all up after that. Confiscated the tapes and sold the news some story that an evil plot of some criminal had been thwarted. I'm still in all appearances, a member of the police force after all. But those who were monitoring this case deemed my actions right. Youngsaeng was a dangerous threat. As I said, a watcher had far too much power. And if he'd gone rogue, it'd have been a disaster-"

"Then what about you?" Jungmin finally broke, "Don't you have even more power? You say that there are measures in place to stop that from going too far, but you haven't told me what those are. What if you became corrupt, your moral compass skewed? What more of a disaster could you cause?"

Hyunjoong seemed to stiffen eyeing the gun in Jungmin's hands before closing his eyes. "...What do you think?" Hyunjoong asked quietly. "Was my moral compass skewed when I judged your partner's case? Was I unfair in any way?"

And in that split second, it became crystal clear what was being asked of him. And for a moment, he very much wanted to squeeze the trigger. A split second impulse far too easy to execute. A split second where months of asking 'why, why,why" boiled down to one chance for payback, screw the consequences.

But the problem was just that: the consequences. And when that split second was over, Jungmin lowered the gun, locking the safety back on with shaking fingers.

"No." Jungmin said quietly, even as he felt Hyunjoong's stare on him, the other having opened his eyes. "You weren't unfair in anyway. The one who let his moral compass get skewed was Youngsaeng. He chose to believe the lies of his lover over what was in front of him. You couldn't have Youngsaeng go - his revenge would have destroyed the Watchers from the inside out. And if you'd have given into your... kindness and had let him go if he'd stopped, you'd have been watching him for years, wasting precious time and effort that could be placed elsewhere, because you'd never if Youngsaeng could really be trusted. In a way, as... cold as it is, as much as I loath to say it, it's better that he was killed."

It was the truth, but it was so hard to say. And he could barely stop the tears, barely stop the shake in his voice, gun loose in his hands.

"I think Youngsaeng knew it too." Jungmin realised what that look his partner had given him just before he'd died was: it had been a look of resignation and apology. He'd died understanding why he'd been killed.

And unfortunately, Jungmin understood why too, "I... I can't condemn you for doing something that I would have done."

Then there was silence, as if that moment was suspended in time. Jungmin didn't even know if he was breathing. There was no sound. There was no movement. There was... Nothing.

And then Hyunjoong took a step forward, and there were arms around his shoulders, tossing the gun away from his hands. And that was when everything broke.

Hyunjoong's voice was soft as he murmured equally soft words. Jungmin was too distraught to catch most of them. Tears were pouring from his eyes, his heart aching from the sheer emptiness of finally discovering the truth. The only words he caught were the gently frantic apologies. The words ‘I’m sorry’, repeating, at first sporadically, and then as Hyunjoong had begun to run out of words to say, became more frequent until they were the only words that he could say. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

But those words only made Jungmin cry harder, feel sillier - because there was nothing Hyunjoong really had to apologise for. Kyujong had warned him time and again that the truth would only bring him grief. And yet, Jungmin had known that he wouldn’t be able to live again until it had come to light. Hyunjoong was not at fault. No. In fact, he’d made the truth easier to bear. A figure to cast his hate upon - undeserved hate as Jungmin now realized.

Finally, he couldn’t stand hearing them anymore. And there was only one way that Jungmin could think to stop Hyunjoong saying it. Another split second decision. Another impulse. But this time, Jungmin decided to take the plunge and he fell, lips landing on Hyunjoong’s cutting off the sound of the meaningless words meant to comfort.

For a moment, it was awkward. Hyunjoong’s lips were unmoving, unresponsive. And for that moment, Jungmin thought he’d made a mistake. But then, the moment passed, and then, Hyunjoong was kissing back, lips curved into a smile. Of relief, or happiness, or sadness, Jungmin didn’t know.

Or rather, in that moment, he hadn’t bothered to care.

~*~

Jungmin wasn’t too sure where they were. Hyunjoong did seem to know. It was a room where there weren’t any prying eyes, that was all Jungmin cared. It was all he had the capacity to care, when there were lips on his collarbone and a hand sliding around his waste, breath too peppered in his ear, hurried perfection.

Their clothes came off.

~*~

They wake up. Jungmin doesn't know if it was together, or one after another. But the first hour is spent bonelessly draped over each other, trailing fingers gently over skin until rational thought finally set back in and Jungmin had a question that he needed to ask.

"So... what does this mean... for us now?"

Hyunjoong blinked, his fingers pausing in their trail down Jungmin's side. "Oh... right." He sat up, making Jungmin blink up at him in confusion. "I was... supposed to tell you last night, but we got distracted."

"Last night? Tell me what?" A sense of foreboding crept over Jungmin.

"Well, remember what I said about the auditors and the very strict selection process of becoming one...? Well, one of the 'tests' in that selection process is well... a... practical test."

It was credit to Jungmin that he immediately caught on to what Hyunjoong was saying. "Are you saying... the whole of that incident... with me investigating Youngsaeng's case, was a test?"

Hyunjoong winced. "Well, it didn't start out that way. But as you got closer and closer to the truth and we were monitoring your progress, we realized that you had a lot of qualities of an auditor. And if you made a rational decision, even in your grief, like you've done, then you would have more than qualified for the position of auditor."

"...Wait. So you're saying that I can be an auditor now?"

"Well... yeah." Hyunjoong shrugged, "with some paperwork of course. But... yeah. If you want to. You can also become a secret keeper if that's what you want. Or you could remain a Watcher, just that you'd have more reports to write than before..."

"Hang on... so wait. What if I had shot you last night, that means that I wouldn't have qualified to be an auditor?"

"Hmm? Oh... no." Hyunjoong shook his head. "It wasn't so much the decision as the process that you got to the decision." Hyunjoong's lips quirked a little, a slightly dark expression in his eyes. "You were right again about the organisation not being very tolerant of killings within the ranks. Of course, as auditors we have a bit more leeway, but there's always an investigation carried out on the auditor who made that judgement if a kill is done. It's just a matter of when. And so, as long as your process towards coming to your decision had been rational, even if that decision had been that I was unfair in deciding for execution, you would have passed and qualified to be an auditor."

"..." There were many questions swirling in Jungmin's head again, but one of them was most prominent. "How... did you... become an auditor?"

"Me?" Hyunjoong blinked, "oh well. It was a similar process. I... actually told you half of the story already."

"Half the story... Well, you said that you were in the police force... and that... your partner was killed by the same person that killed... oh."

"Yeah." There was a soft, sad tinge to that smile on Hyunjoong's lips. "I killed my own partner."

Jungmin didn't say a word, only slowly reached out, placing a soft hand on Hyunjoong's cheek as he continued. "That was… probably the only straight-out lie I told you. The six months was… training to be an auditor, not a Watcher. We were trained as Watchers from a young age like you and your partner was, and when we finally graduated, we were placed into the police force as eyes and ears there. After all, you know as well as I do that corruption is sadly rife in the line of justice.”

“At first, it was all good, but then, after the first few years... I began to notice something odd about my partner. He would.... sometimes leave certain things out of reports. And... then, we got reports about failed missions that had connections to the information we gave... Things like that. My partner explained everything away very well and all... but well. I knew him. He had a very glib tongue; was the one who thought me the game of charm in fact - and the one thing he could never get me comfortable doing was telling a straight-out lie."

"Long story short... I did an even more convoluted version of what I did with Youngsaeng. Gave him many times to repent but all he did was... well, pretend to stop, then after a while when he thought I wasn't looking, start over again. It was slightly more than a year and then finally I sought to bring him before the secret keepers for a trial. He didn't like that of course. There was a struggle... and he caught hold of a hostage and... I just..."

There was a long pause, Hyunjoong just looking out into nothing. Jungmin was just getting worried when he shook his head, looking at the bed coverlet, before he chuckled. “That was proof enough for my competence as an auditor apparently. So then began my new life in the organization… after a ton of psychological tests to make sure I hadn’t gone nutso from killing my closest friend.”

Jungmin hummed. “Mmm… I see.” Then he smiled, a quirk of his lips. “Well... that was... interesting. But I got distracted.”

“Distracted?”

“When I asked what this would mean for us I mean… in a… you know. More intimate sense.” Jungmin gestured to the both of them and their state of ness. “What was last night? Where do we go from now on?”

“Oh.” Hyunjoong blinked before, much to Jungmin’s amusement, he blushed. “Oh… uh. That well… I don’t know.”

“Were you flirting with me from the beginning?”

“Um well. It was… just a method of mine to get you comfortable with me-”

“So was that all it was? A method for me to get comfortable with you?”

“Wha- no! No.” Jungmin didn’t know why. He’d meant it as a joke, but Hyunjoong’s sincere denial of the jibe soothed a fear he didn’t know was there. “No. It was at first, but then after a while, it became real without me knowing. I liked the banter we had… and then. Remember the time where I insisted we only talk through phone calls?”

“Yeah?”

“That was me getting cold feet.”

So Jungmin hadn’t been mistaken after all. Hyunjoong had been avoiding him then. “What changed your mind?”

Hyunjoong opened his mouth then paused, before chewing on his lip. “Well… I.” He sighed. “At that time, I just thought… if in the end you judged me to be unfair, then at the very least, I wanted to die at the hands of someone who knew me… as I really was.”

There was an apology in Hyunjoong’s eyes. If Jungmin had chosen to kill Hyunjoong in the end, then Jungmin would have had to live with the guilt of having killed someone who was more than a name on a paper. But then, Jungmin had never been one to dwell on what could have been. “Mmm.”

“What about you? Was last night just on impulse and feeling all tender from raw emotions? Or did my corny advances actually work?” Hyunjoong was grinning as if he believed it was more of the latter. Well he was in for a bit of a surprise then.

“Actually, despite my frowny faces and supposedly one-track determination to get down to the truth of Youngsaeng’s… death.” It still smarted saying that unfortunately. “I was actually attracted to you.”

“...What?”

“Yeah. Corny advances are my thing apparently.” Jungmin smirked before he shook his head. “Honestly though, I think what prevented me from acting on it was… well it felt inappropriate. As much as the thing I had with Youngsaeng was only physical… it was too early. Too raw. I loved him, not romantically I think. But I did love him.”

Hyunjoong nodded slowly, “I understand. Sort of. I’ve never really gone through something similar so I can only guess.”

“Mmm.” Jungmin tilted his head, sighing. “Does that mean though, that that would make my judgement of you unfair, since well, I am sort of biased, having feelings for you.”

Hyunjoong paused, before he ran his fingers through Jungmin’s hair, a small smile on his face. “Maybe. Maybe not. I’ve always felt that you needed to know someone at least a little, to make a fair judgement of them. Looking at the facts only gets your so far, and well. We’re humans, not robots. It’s a common saying among the auditors, that when we judge, we can only do so with our flawed and relative human logic, with only whatever our minds can comprehend of the other person’s motivations and feelings. With time, maybe, our judgement will change. But as to whether that will happen, only time will tell.”

“Mmm… And if time tells us that my judgement was indeed wrong?”

Hyunjoong gave a wry smile. “Then one day you’ll wake up, and then I’ll be gone. Killed by someone who analyzes by the facts and cold logic.”

“Is there a higher authority than the auditors?”

But Hyunjoong shook his head. “The auditors were never a higher authority. We’re like the secret keepers - same rank, different function. The Watchers watch the world, the secret keepers keep their secrets and the auditors are the ones that watch the Watchers. And thereafter, the Watchers watch the ones who watch the Watchers to make sure the auditors do not subscribe to the misconception that they are higher than the others and so on and so forth. It’s a never ending cycle really - that’s how we make sure the organization stays uncorrupt. It’s not perfect though and sometimes we need to get a second opinion. Get someone else who evaluates in a different way from the original evaluation. If you feel that you judged with your heart, then the next time round, they will send someone who would judge with their mind.”

And because Jungmin looked troubled, Hyunjoong smiled, pulling the other man for a kiss. “But we won’t have to worry about that anything soon. Bureaucracy in an organization like this is like the operation of a tank, especially when it comes with no major threat. We can enjoy whatever this is, for a little while longer.”

"...It'd be hard." it wasn't really a question, but Hyunjoong replied with an answer anyway.

"Yeah. But it'd be a little simpler if you became an auditor too." Hyunjoong grinned, playfully kissing Jungmin's cheek.

Truthfully, it wasn't like things were going to be easy either way. Even if it seemed that Hyunjoong had shown his real person during the time they'd known each other. He was still someone who had to lie in his profession and had lied to Jungmin, or at the very least had concealed certain things about himself, even if it had been unavoidable. It left the possibility open, and that wasn't healthy for any relationship. And it wasn't like Jungmin was a field of daisies and sunshine himself.

But he was done thinking for now. He'd made his judgement and was going along with it. If things revealed to be not what they seemed to be as it was now, then well, Jungmin would judge again then.

Jungmin gave a dry laugh, "I'll think about it. But of course, you can continue to try to persuade me?"

"Persuade you, meaning this?" Hyunjoong nibbled a little on Jungmin's ear, hands pulling the other close again, enjoying the soft sounds of pleasure Jungmin was making.

"Yes. Very much that." Jungmin grinned, turning around in the hold and wrapping his arms around the other's neck, eyes flickering with mischief as he met Hyunjoong's own amused brown orbs. "Very, very much that."

END