Kyuhyun’s POV

“Kyu.. listen, I have something to tell you..” Sungmin says while closing our room door, “I.. I have a girlfriend..”

“YOU WHAT?! Minnie.. please tell me you are joking” I replied, almost about to cry. I was famous for hardly crying, but when it comes to sungmin, I cannot control my emotions. Sungmin is the one who controls my emotions, he makes me feel happy, sad and angry. Without him, I would be the same guy I was before, a guy with no emotions. I didn’t feel like a person before I met sungmin, he made me feel complete. I knew very well I couldn’t live without sungmin.

“I’m serious kyu.. I’m sorry, I should have fought for us.. but you know, it’s hard to be a gay.. I want to have a family, I want to have kids.. She.. she made me feel like a normal guy. I love her kyu.. But I love you too, I still have feelings for you, but I’m not sure if I have romantic feelings towards you or I love you only as a younger brother… I’m sorry kyu… Please give me some time”

I broke down. At that very moment I felt like all my energy and soul was drained away, I was left with nothing. Me, cho kyuhyun, feeling helpless. I couldn’t even believe it myself. That was the first time my mind was in a complete blank, that was the first time I had absolutely no clue what I should do. What should I do?

“Kyuhyun ah.. please get up..”

That voice, that warm familiar voice, suddenly felt so foreign and cold to me.

At that moment, something in me snapped.

“NO SUNGMIN, NO I’M NOT GOING TO GET UP! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME? DO YOU ACTUALLY EXCEPT ME TO GET UP AND PRETEND LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED?! WHY IS IT THAT EVERYTHING I THOUGHT I OWNED IS SUDDENLY GONE!!!! Sungmin… why?...” I started sobbing uncontrollably, I, cho kyuhyun, never thought I would cry like this. Why must sungmin bring about so many emotions…

I knew there was no turning back for us, but I couldn’t let him go, and I wasn’t planning to.

I tried so hard for the next couple of months to win sungmin back, I knew he still felt something for me. We were together for so many years, how could our years of relationship even be compared to a girl he only knew for months!

I was adamant in my decision to win his heart again. Nothing was going to waver my determination. Or so I thought.

It was 1am when sungmin came home that day. I was so happy to see that he was home much earlier today.

“Sungmin ah! Come! Let me show you…” Before I could even finish my sentence, I was cut off by sungmin.

“Kyuhyun, I’m getting married.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, “So.. this is it? This is the end of our relationship?” my voice was shaking and I could hardly project my voice.

“Sorry kyu..” Sungmin replied.

I rushed out of the room, I couldn’t believe it. Nothing mattered to me anymore. Losing Sungmin meant that I had lost myself. There was nothing left for me.

It was 3.30am when I went back into our room. I saw sungmin sleeping soundly on his bed and I saw a letter on my bed. It stated “to kyu”

“Kyuhyun, I know no matter how many sorry I say, it wouldn’t make you feel any better. In fact, you may feel worse because it is reminding you of your pain. But that is really all I can say. The memories that we once shared is something I treasure a lot and I want you to know that I did love you. You were always there for me whenever I need you. I remember locking the room door and drinking red wine with you, I remember you giving me a high-5 just because all the other members ignored my high-5, I remember you holding my hand just because I said I was scared. Kyuhyun ah, I remember, I really do remember. Just remember we’ll always be together. Although we cannot be a couple anymore, but we will always be friends. Kyuhyun, I hope you know that nothing has changed and I will always be here for you. Just like how it was before.”

Today, I am here witnessing sungmin get married. I have learnt that letting go is also a form of love and today I am letting you go. “Sungmin ah, take care” I mumbled before the wedding hall.