[Gravity - Sara Bareilles]

 

 

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do, 
I still feel you here 'till the moment I'm gone.

 

 

Two months have passed since I've been engaged to him. Two months since I let out my feelings for her without her knowing.

 

Chaerin.

 

The kiss we shared is still fresh on my lips. The taste of her soft buds is so addicting, it's driving me crazy. It felt like I've already tasted it even before I decided to lean and touch those sweet lips with my own.

 

I am now preparing for my upcoming wedding in a month. Yeah, he does move fast, does he? I don't think he doesn't have any plan of letting me go. Although our relationship is already official, my management decided to keep our wedding a secret since 2NE1 would have a comeback in a few months and we don't want to be bothered by the media asking about my personal life.
 

We have been together for three years already. He's a gentleman, a guy that any woman would wish to be married to. Should I consider myself lucky? Yes. Should I consider myself happy about it? Not really. Why?

 

Because of her.

 

 

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much 
Than to drown in your love and not feel your reign.

 

 

It's our day-off from recording our new single to be released next quarter. I just stayed at the dorm to take a break from our busy schedule.

 

I woke up from a deep sleep and glanced at the bedside clock. 10:17am. It's too late for breakfast now. Aigoo.
My feet paced to the dining area to find myself some food to eat. My eyes caught a sight of something prepared at the table. I took a closer look and found a complete breakfast meal with a note attached to it.

 

"Good morning, Darong! I prepared breakfast for you. I know you'll get up late since you were so tired last night. I went out for my work out session with Hwangssabu-nim and decided to pass by the studio to check our next schedule. Just text me if you need anything. Enjoy your meal, Ssandara Park-unnie! ^^
 

                                                                                                                                                                                                               Your Baby Rin"

 

See? This little things are the ones that made me love her. I haven't realized that I've been smiling like an idiot while I keep on rereading the short note she left for me. Too bad, I have to teach my heart to let her go. 
 

Am I certain about my decision? Yes. It's for the best. 
 

Am I succeeding with it? A big N-O.
 

I can't help but fail every time I see her looking at me with that eyesmile I always adore. Every time she does these thoughtful acts, I know my plan is already a failure. But I have to because I have to remind myself that I'm already engaged and Chaerin won't love me that way.

I grabbed my phone and sent her a message.

 

To: Rin <3
 

"Thanks for the meal, Baby Rin! I really appreciate it. ^_^ Take care, okay?"
 

From: Ssantokki-ssi

 

I was in the middle of eating the meal Chaerin has cooked for me when she arrived, all sweaty and charming. How does she do that?

 

"Hi, unnie! How's the food?", she approached me while I kept on putting food inside my mouth.
 

I just gave her two thumbs up because my mouth is so full. Can you blame me? Chaerin cooks like a dream! She'd be a very good wife. Wait..
 

She laughed at my feedback and sat at one of the chairs. She just looked at me until I finished my meal. I have to admit, there was no hint of awkwardness when she did that. I'd be so uncomfortable if someone else would stare at me that way while I eat. But with her, it feels so natural. So right.

 

As much I want to be the only one who see this side of Chaerin, I want her to stop. I don't think I deserve this kind of treatment from her. I'm getting married soon yet my heart is longing for her. I thought I was already tired of waiting for her. But here she is, being extra sweet than she already is, I think the operation "Move On From Lee Chaerin" is going down the drain.

 

Stop this, Chaerin. Whatever you're doing to me, I don't think my heart can handle anymore.

 

 

Set me free, leave me be. 
I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.

 

 

 

Two weeks have passed, two weeks to go before my so-called special day. Me and my fiancé has been to many places for the past few days, organizing everything since the wedding is getting near. It was a miracle to have managed this kind of appointments since both of us are busy with our own careers, with him being a great doctor and all.

I got home at nine in the evening, a sight of Chaerin nowhere to be found.

 

"Chaerin-ah?"

"In my room, unnie!", I heard her yell.

 

I went to her room and saw her writing some new compositions for our new album coming out next year. She's so hardworking. Again, one of the things I love about her.

 

"There you are."

 

"Here I am, how's your day, unnie?", she asked me after putting her pen down then facing me.

 

"Exhausting. We've been around the city, organizing everything for the big day."

 

"Hmmm.", she just nods in understanding.

 

I saw her break her gaze at me and stared at the papers she was working on a while ago. I think she wants to say something to me but she keeps on refraining herself to.

 

"What's the matter, Chae?"

 

"Do you want to go somewhere tomorrow? Just to take a breath of fresh air. Do you?"

 

Here I am and I stand so tall, 
Just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

 

 

 

Here we are at an amusement park, just the two of us. Bom and Minzy are supposed to be with us but Minzy is occupied with her college activities and Bom went home to her family for a get together. So it ended up with just me and Chaerin.

 

"So where do you want to go first, unnie?", she asked me with her cute voice. Her aegyo is one of the few things that I can't resist, like ramyun.

 

"There!", I pointed to the rollercoaster and dragged her to the ride with excitement rushing through my body.

 

We went to almost every ride available. We also took some pictures at the photobooth and made wacky poses. She won at one of those game stalls where you have to pop the balloons with darts. She picked the cute yellow lion plushie and gave it to me, saying that it would remind me of her.

 

"It's already seven. It's getting dark.", I mutter.

 

"Yeah, and the lights in the plaza are gonna be on in a few minutes. Let's ride the ferris wheel!", she suggested.

 

We got into one of the cables and the ride started to move. Both of us looked at the window, getting a very nice view of the city. There was the plaza she's talking about with all the lights shining brightly. Definitely a breathtaking sight from above.

"Did you have fun?", Chaerin broke the silence between us.

 

"Of course I did! Thank you so much, Chae. I needed this."

 

"Anything for you Dara-unnie.", she said to me.

 

All of the sudden, she held my right hand and put it up to her lips to kiss it. My heart raced when I felt those lips in contact with my skin once again. I know my face is now red. Her eyes were shut as if feeling the warmth that's in my hand then opened them slowly, exposing her brown orbs looking at my own with so much love and passion. I swear, that was the iest thing I've seen in my life.
 

Without any second thought, she leaned forward and captured my lips for a gentle kiss. She held me by the waist as I wrapped my arms around her neck. It's like all the feelings contained inside of me is now bursting everywhere. I never felt so alive. So free. Then reality hit me and I pulled away from her.

 

"I'm sorry, Chae. I can't. We can't. I'm just.. Sorry.", my words are all jumbled in my mouth as the cable stopped and I immediately got off and walked as fast as I can.

 

I'm sorry, Chaerin. I've been wishing for that moment to happen but not like this. Not when I'm engaged to someone else and soon to be married. Not when I'm confused about what you really feel about me.

 

"Unnie!", I heard her call me but I didn't bother to turn as I run away, leaving her all alone.

 

 

You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while 
And all my fragile strength is gone.

 

 

 

I reached home and went straight to my bedroom. I just lied on my bed, closing my eyes as I reminisce the events that happened earlier.
 

The rides. The photo. The stuffed toy.
 

I snatched the stuffed lion from my bag. I smiled as it does remind me of her. Then the memory struck me with the kiss at the ferris wheel. Tears escaped from my eyes while I clutch the stuffed animal close to my chest.

 

"Unnie. Please talk to me.", I heard her voice behind my door as she knocked.

"Please, unnie. I'm sorry. Just open the door."

 

I kept quiet and held the small lion tighter. Not now, Chaerin.

"Okay, just hear me out.", she spoke again.

"I'm sorry about what happened back there. I just felt that the moment was so right that I can't help but kiss you. I love you, Dara."

 

She loves me? Like LOVES me?

 

"I-I've been in love with you for a while now. I have been for a long time actually. This might be the worst time to confess but it's now or never. It's too late anyway. I was a coward for not even saying it to you upfront. I managed to blurt it out to you during that night you told me you got engaged while you're asleep in my arms. It doesn't matter now since you'll be tying the knot very soon."

I can sense that she is crying as well. Why now, Chaerin? It would be impossible for me to let you go, knowing that you love me too.

 

"I just wanted to tell you this so I can let you go without any regrets. I love you, Dara. I really do."

 

Everything turned silent after hearing her footsteps and a shut of a door next to my room. I cried myself out until everything went black as my cries turned into light snores, putting me to sleep once more.

 

 

Set me free, leave me be. 
I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall,
Just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

 

 

 

 

I struggled to open my eyes since they're all swollen from crying last night. I noticed that I was still hugging the stuffed lion. I decided to call it Rinrin. I put him beside Tamtam. It's funny how they both came from her. My babies.
My boyfriend never gave me a stuffed toy because he said that it's childish. I actually got hurt because I think stuffed toys are cute and thoughtful as gifts.

 

I got up from bed, put on my Kiiroitori slippers and walked out of my room. I took a glance at her room and saw it unoccupied. I wonder where she is?
I headed towards the kitchen for a glass of water. A piece of paper taped on the door of the fridge caught my attention.

 

"I'm at Harin's apartment. I know you need your time alone and so do I. Don't worry about me.
P.S. I don't think I'll be your maid of honor now. I don't know if I could face you especially after what happened. I'm really sorry.
 

                                                                                                                                                                             Chaerin"

 

She's not going to my wedding. I can't blame her. Who wants the love of their life get married to someone else? I'm sorry too, Chae. I'm sorry it had to be like this. I know we're both hurting right now but maybe we're not really meant for each other.

 

Maybe we're not meant to be.

 

 

 

I live here on my knees as I
Try to make you see that you're
Everything I think I need here on the ground.

 

 

 

 

I have not seen Chaerin after that incident. We are currently on break since my secret marriage will soon take place. Now I regret not opening the door that night. We could have fixed this. I'm so stupid.
 

Tomorrow would be my wedding day. Bom decided to throw a bridal shower for me but with just the four of us. As expected, Chaerin declined the invitation.
 

Here we are now at a bar near the dorm. The three of us are sitting on the stools by the table where drinks are served.

 

"Hey, why is Chaerin not coming?", Bom asked loudly since the bar is too noisy.

 

"Um, she decided to visit Harin today."

 

"But isn't she at Harin's place last week?", she countered.

 

I didn't answer because I don't know if I should tell them.

 

"Is there something wrong between you two, unnie?", Minzy raised the question, probably noticing the change in my expressions.

 

"Can we go somewhere else to talk about this?", I suggested and they both agreed.

 

 

We got to our favorite hang out place during our debut days. Han River. We always go here when we need to reflect about something or just to have peace and quiet.

"So spill, Dara.", Bom insisted.

 

I told them the whole thing. They weren't surprised at all when I told them that we loved each other. Then I remember the "married couple" thing so they kinda expected it to happen.

 

"What do I do now? My wedding is tomorrow but I still can't let go of Chaerin.", I cried in Bom's embrace. I'm so tired of crying already. It's killing me.

Bom just held me closer to comfort me. And Minzy looked at me with concern written in her eyes.

 

"Just follow your heart, unnie.", Minzy suddenly said.

"Sometimes, doing what we are supposed to do prevents us from doing what could make us genuinely happy. If you follow your heart's desire, you won't do anything that you'll regret even if it means a great risk."

 

Bom and I stared at our maknae amusingly. Is she really just twenty and single?

 

"What?", Minzy asked as she noticed our amused gaze at her.

 

"Are you really single, Minji-ah?", Bom joked.

 

"Aish, Bom-unnie! But seriously, what I said is true and you both know it, ahjummas.", Minzy fired back.
 

We all let out a big laugh which brought the atmosphere a bit lighter. I'm so blessed to have these two as my best friends.

 

"Thank you, Minji. I'll think about it."

 

"Well, think fast. You're gonna get married tomorrow. What will you do?", Bom asked.

 

She's right. What will I do?

 

 

But you're neither friend nor foe though I
Can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down
You're keeping me down, yeah

 

 

 

It's the day of the wedding. I'm getting my make up done, as well as my bridesmaids, Minzy and my sister, Durami, and my new maid of honor, Bommie.

 

"Are you ready, unnie?", my sister asked me.

I can only manage to smile because I really don't know what to feel right now.

"Don't be nervous, unnie. You'll be fine. You look so beautiful.", she tried to comfort me.

I gave her an assuring smile and held her hands. "Thank you, dongsaeng."

 

As Durami left the room, Bom and Minzy approached me.

 

"Are you okay, unnie?", I just nodded at the maknae.

 

"So, shall we?", the elder member said.

 

 

So we arrived at the venue and looks like all the guests are here. The entire YG family and staff and my family are the only ones present. But the most special person for me is not in sight. I miss her so much.
 

I'm about to walk to the door where I saw my brother, Cheondung, all dashing in his tuxedo waiting for me to arrive when Bom and Minzy, who were behind me, whispered,
 

"Good luck, Dara-yah. It's not yet too late for your happiness."

 

"Remember what I said, unnie. Follow your heart."

 

I kept those thoughts in mind as I walk towards my brother.

"Noona, you look so beautiful. I hope my future bride would be as lovely as you."

"Aish, stop teasing, Kettung-ah! But thanks."

 

We shared a brief hug then he pulled away and asked me, "Are you ready?"
 

I nodded at him and the doors opened, revealing all the people who are staring back at me happily as Cheondung and I begin to walk down the aisle.
 

"Why don't you look so happy, Dara-noona?", he whispered to me as we kept on pacing slowly towards the altar. I gave him a questioning look.

 

"Is it because Chaerin-ssi is not here?", my eyes widen when he said her name.

 

"How did you know?"

 

"I always thought you two have a special bond. I almost expected you to come out and say you love her.", he slightly chuckled.

 

I stopped my pace. He noticed me held my position and looked at me.

 

"I can't do it, Cheondung. I do. I love her.", I said honestly.

He smiled at me as if he knew it all along. He grabbed something in his pocket and replied, 

 

"Go now, noona. Go and get your true love.", he handed me the thing from his pocket.
 

His car key.

 

"Thank you.", I hugged him and ran towards my groom.

 

"I'm sorry. I can't do this. I don't want to lie to you and to myself anymore.", I returned the engagement ring he gave me. 

 

Before I made a U-turn, he pulled by the wrist and kissed me. A goodbye kiss.

 

"Goodbye, Sandara. I knew all along that you weren't mine to keep. But thank you for giving me a chance to  call you mine.  Be happy with Chaerin, okay?", I was taken aback by his last sentence.

 

Am I really that obvious, even to him? Then I remembered our past dates, I tend to absentmindedly mention Chaerin most of the time. I really am in love with her ever since.

I nodded and made my way outside the place. Everyone was in shock to what just happened but I didn't care. I need to find her.

 

Where are you, my Chaerin?

 

 

I decided to call Harin's number to ask if her sister was still with her.

 

"Hello? Dara-unnie?"

 

"Harinnie, is Chaerin still with you?"

 

"Um, not anymore. She said she'll be at her favorite place to unwind. I'm actually worried about her.", Harin replied with a concerned tone.

 

"Oh, okay. Thank you, Harin. I hope I didn't disturb you."

 

"No problem, Dara-unnie. Please make her happy again. I know you're the only one who can do it to her right now.", I smiled at what Harin said.

 

I made my way to Han River with Cheondung's car. I don't even care that I'm still wearing my wedding dress. All I need right now is Chaerin. To hold her, hug her, kiss her. 

 

To love her.

 

 

You're onto me, onto me and all over

 

 

 

"Is it too late?", Chaerin murmured to herself as she was sitting by the lonely river, hugging her kness while watching the flow of the water.

 

"You would be married by now, so yeah, I am too late. Four years too late.", she made a bitter laugh.

 

"I never thought I would love someone this much. I also didn't know it would hurt a lot that the pain is unbearable."

Chaerin buried her face to her arms resting upon her knees then someone spoke.

 

"Who's the lucky person whom you love so much that it hurts?"

 

She froze at her place when she recognized the voice. It can't be.

 

"Dara?", she looked up.

 

Dara gave her a sweet smile. "Enough with the drama, Lee Chaerin. We still have somewhere to go."

 

"Am I too late?", Chaerin replied nonchalantly, noticing that Dara is still in her wedding dress.

 

"Nope, I'm actually overdressed. We're going back to the dorm to prepare for our next date."

 

She ran away from her wedding. For me., Chaerin thought.

 

Dara held Chaerin's hand to make her stand up and face her. Chaerin let out a smirk.

 

"Aren't you supposed to be in your honeymoon with your new hubby?", she said with a jealous tone.

"Haha, jealous? No need to worry, CL-roo. I'm still single and you're still my hubby. My one and only.", Dara teased Chaerin as she pinched the latter's nose.

 

"The wedding didn't push through?"

 

"Of course it didn't, pabo.", Dara laughed at her.

 

"Yah, don't call me that. I'm just making sure.", she defended.

 

"Good thing you're wedding was held a secret because your runaway would be the scandal of the century.", Chaerin exclaimed.

"Yeah, we wouldn't want that.", Dara chuckled. She reached out for the younger girl's hair and tucked some strands behind the latter's ear.

 

"I actually owe you an answer since I didn't let you hear my side when you confessed."

 

Chaerin just looked at her intently, signaling her to continue.

 

"You were never too late, Chaerin. From the start, my heart was owned by you and no one else. I guess I just didn't notice it until the earthquake incident in Japan before. Unfortunately, I already have a boyfriend back then so I didn't acknowledge the feeling I have for you.", she cupped Chaerin's face with both hands.

 

"However, my love for you just grew stronger every single day. I cherish even the littlest thing you do for me. Every flaw and mistakes you have and do, I accept and embrace them wholeheartedly. You're perfect to me. I can't help but fall in love whenever I see your adorable eyesmile. I can't able to resist that aegyo of yours which is for my eyes only."

 

"I feel special when I'm with you. Because of that, I'm forever thankful. I love you, Lee Chaerin."

 

With one swift move, Dara kissed Chaerin, filling it with all the love she have for the younger girl. Chaerin managed to reciprocate though she's still overwhelmed by the brunette's words. They just let the moment sink in before they pull away for air.

 

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for this moment to come.", Chaerin said, almost breathless because of the tender kiss.

 

"Then you should have courted me four years ago!", Dara joked.

"Well, you should've dumped your boyfriend instead of making me suffer.", Chaerin fired back.

They laughed for a while then both got lost in each other's eyes and didn't bother to be found.

 

"Thank you for still having faith in me, in us, after all these years.", Dara said while inerlocking their fingers.

 

"Well, Faith is my other name.", Chaerin grinned.

Dara laughed at her reply. 

 

"It is, but I like Chaerin better."

 

They leaned on each other's foreheads and listened to their hearts beating in harmony.

 

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

 

They shared another kiss. Both just can't get enough of the other as they went deeper into the kiss. They've been waiting for this for so long. The two of them were quiet after pulling away until Chaerin spoke.

 

"So about that date you were saying, where are we going this time?"

"Hmm, now that you've mentioned it, I'm hungry. Let's eat some ramyun!", Dara raised her fist comically as she mentioned her favorite food.

 

Chaerin just did her usual laughing fit whenever Dara does her antics. The new couple walked hand in hand, looking forward to their first official date and the future that they will share, now that they are bonded by the love that has been waiting all along to blossom.

 

 

Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long

 

 

 

A/N: Hey, Chaera readers! I'm sorry I just updated today since I've been thinking about making this story longer since it's supposed to be just a two-shot. But, I'm working on it now so just stay tuned. ^^ I don't know when but maybe next week, perhaps. Don't forget to comment! Till then! Ppyong~!

P.S. Thanks for those people who have been very supportive of my Chaera spams on Twitter lately. Haha, I wish I could do it everyday though.