The Beginning

            Yuri never considered herself as a loser.  There were a lot of mean kids at school but she was never at the receiving of jokes and mean pranks.  She is not one of the popular kids either, unlike her brother and Yunho, but she shares lunch table with a very pretty transferee, Yoona and she is friends with the school’s sweetheart, Tiffany. 

            Her life is pretty normal.  She goes to school, joins a club – the fencing club, watches her brother’s games and even goes to movies with some classmates a some weekends.  She’s not a wallflower in parties, too.  Even though she never dated, she has friends who are the same.  But that doesn’t mean that she’s not interested in guys or dating one.

            There was a guy in some of her classes, Jongsuk.  She caught him looking at her a few times and she thinks that he was extremely cute but he never really asked her out so nothing happened.  She even tried smiling at him so they could be friends to begin with.  The guy could just never take the hint. 

            She was going to be a high schooler that next autumn and her love was the least of her problems.  Her brother was doing great as a second-grader, as well as his best friend.  She was so pressured to make a good impression so she’s reading some advanced lessons.

            “You know that it’s useless, right?” Changmin said.  He and Yunho were in in front of their TV, playing a video game.  She was reading one his books on the couch.  “You’ll never remember those when you get to bed.”

            His friend just laughed, more like sniggered.  “Don’t worry, Yul.  You excel in fencing.  You can, at least, be proud of that.”

            She didn’t know if she should be pissed or not.  Her brother has always been smart and competed in quiz bees.  Yunho isn’t that smart but he’s grades are full of A’s.  Still, it’s not reason enough to be mean to her. 

            “You’ll be amazed when you see me in one of those advanced classes,” she said trying to ignore them. 

            “We’re not holding our breath,” Yunho said which gained a loud laugh from her own brother.

            “s,” she muttered.  Unfortunately, her mother chose that time to pass by and heard her.

            “Yuri, you are not going to high school with that foul mouth, are you?” she said, laundry basket in hand. 

           “Sorry, Ma,” she said.  She waited until her mother is out of earshot and gave the two laughing guys a kick each.  She would rather go to her room and listen to some music now.  “You just wait until I make it.”

            She could never exactly tell when she started liking her brother’s best friend.  All she knows is that it started the summer before she started high school.  She started being all awkward so suddenly around him and became too conscious when he was around.

            There was one time when she was on her way to a friend’s house so that she could dip in a pool.  Jessica, the said friend, lives in a fancy neighborhood with a clubhouse with a swimming pool.  Outsiders are not allowed but since she is coming with one of the residents, she is a guest. 

              She was on her bike, already sweaty from the heat.  She could already feel her bathing suit underneath her clothes sticking too much on her body.  She just couldn’t wait to get to the clubhouse already.

            She then heard a car honking at her.  She turned and saw Yunho’s car.  She forgot that he lived around the neighborhood, too.  Great!

            She just continued pedaling but she slowed down.  His car caught up at her pace and he lowered his window.

            “What’s up?” he said.

            “Sweating like a pig.  And yourself?” she then heard a faint laugh from inside the car.  !  It was too late to retract what she just said.  Is he with some fancy girl and she just made herself look like an crude girl?  She tried to peek inside his car but all she could see is a flawless thin arms, so unlike her.

            “Doing good so far,” he said with a hint of laughter in his voice.  “Listen, Yuri, tell your brother later that I can’t drop by later.  Something came up and I promise to make it up to him tomorrow.”

            “Don’t you have a phone?  You can tell it to him yourself.”  She was a bit annoyed.  Was he ditching her brother because of this girl inside his car?  She knew he has dated before but he never ditched Changmin before.

            “Cheeky girl,” he said and looked at the girl beside him.  He was probably checking if she was still impressed.  “Just tell him and I’ll get you something.”

            “Okay.”  She was like a little sister to him and he always brings her something.  It was one of the few things why she liked him as her brother’s best friend.

            “There’s a good girl.  See ya, then.”  He then rolled his window up and sped up.  That’s when she totally stopped.  She looked after his car until it disappeared into a corner. 

            For some unknown reason, she felt disappointed.  She knew that he has been taking some girls out but she never really heard him talking about it before.  She felt disappointed that he had to impress his current date at her expense.  She was no longer just a girl.  She’ll be in high school soon, she knew stuff like these. 

            Later she found out that it was Go Ara, a visiting neighbor.  She was like Jessica, very rich and aside from the smooth, thin arm that she had a preview of, Ara has a hair nurtured with Keratin.  It looked so smooth and long and so healthy.  Her prissy hair paled in comparison. 

           “She’s been after him since they were in middle school,” Jessica said.  “It was all the grownups could talk about.  She has been sent away for school but always comes home for summer to chase after him.”

            “She must be very happy now,” she murmured.  It was all she could think about. 

            “Do you like Yunho now or something?” Jessica asked all of the sudden.  She had her sunglasses perched on top of her nose.

            She scoffed at the absurdity.  How could she even think of that?

            “What?  You seem so affected.  I don’t like you obsessing over him.  Most of the girls I know in the neighborhood are into already.  The last thing I need is another one around me.”

            Jessica might be serious, or not.  But she felt it, too.  For the first time, she felt conscious of what he might think of her or the girl that he was currently dating.  She got up and dove into the pool.  The splash she made wet the pavement near the pool.  It was a good thing that it was a fancy Olympic pool.  She could hide herself while trying to tread in the middle of it. 

            Yuri didn’t see Yunho days after that day.  Maybe because her brother wasn’t home most of the time or because he was busy with his new girlfriend.  She didn’t like the latter option much so she just made herself believe that it was the first option. 

            She kept herself busy during those days as well.  She didn’t have her brother or Yunho messing around the house so she pretty much did what she wanted.  She tried to bake some cookies but no one was there to try them.  Her mother would be home by five but Changmin is comes home earlier. 

            “Don’t even try it again,” he said, holding a cookie in front of her face.  Good thing that Yunho wasn’t there to taste it.  God, what he would say.

            Then, there was Tiffany’s sixteenth birthday.  All of her friends are excited.  Tiffany always had the most exciting birthday parties.  Last year, they had a pool party with no boys allowed.  This year, they’re going to dress up as fairies.  Changmin had been teasing her to just wear her old ballerina dress.  She had already forgotten that she had even tried ballet.  All she got were blisters and cramps.

            She could already imagine everyone going looking like Tinkerbell.  She and Yoona already had a fit of laughter when Sooyoung tried to look like Tink the day before.  So she, Yoona and Seohyun would dress like Aurora’s fairy godmothers.  Younger versions.  She is going in a yellow fairy dress.

            Her mother insisted that she’s going to fix their hair for them.  She did wonder to all of them.  When the three of them usually looked alike, this time, her mother made them all look different.  Each is beautiful in her own way. 

            Yunho was there.  He was going to drive them to Tiffany’s house.  He looked very casual like he always was.  Yet for the first that he has known him, she felt conscious.  Did he think that she was beautiful, too?  She was sure that he thought Yoona was the prettiest.  She didn’t really care about that, she just wanted to know if he thinks she was pretty, too.

            “Wow!  Who are you girls?” he said in his usual exaggerated gestures.  “You all look pretty and Yul, you cleaned up pretty nice.”  He smiled at her.

            He then led them to his car.  She was right behind him.  And while tracing his steps, she looked at his back.  That kind of the enlightenment that she didn’t want to come.

            She wanted to keep doing this, to be always right behind him, to be able to trace the steps that he’s taking and for him to be just within her reach. 

            And she doesn’t want to be just her little sister anymore.