AN: Unbetaed.

Part  I

Dear Diary,

I have a crush on someone.

I have a crush on someone since freshman year.

And now it is senior year.

It has been four years already.

This year will be the last year I probably am going to see him every day.

The last year I, Kim Jaejoong could see him, Jung Yunho every day.

It has been three years since Kim Jaejoong had a crush on Jung Yunho.  Four years including the senior year.  The feeling was started during their first assembly during freshman year.  Jaejoong was excited meeting new friends, studying at new environment.   Together with his bestfriend, Kwon Boa, they enrolled in the same school and were placed in the same class.

“How long do we have to stand?” whined Boa.  They were currently standing in the school hall, listening to the headmaster’s welcoming speech.

“Not too long.  After the speech given by the freshman representative, we can head back to our class.” explained Jaejoong to Boa.

“Sheeshh.  Why do we need to hear that stupid talk?  Who the hell is that person?”

Looking at the program leaflet in his hand, Jaejoong  said, “The student is Jung Yunho.  Do you know him, Boa?”

“Pftt, he is probably a nerd, being the student representative.”

“Have you met him?”

“No”

“Then why are you saying he is a nerd?”

“Because I want too”

“You’re not making any sense, Boa.”

“Why are you arguing with me about this Jong person?”

Suddenly they heard someone cleared his throat, behind them.  Turning back, craning their head back a bit, because ‘damn this guy is tall’ is what Jaejoong and Boa thought at that time.  The person glared at them before he speak.

“You both are too noisy.  If you wish to talk to each other, please lower down your voices.  It’s not like both are you are standing a mile apart.  You both were looking for Jung Yunho right?”  Both Jaejoong and Boa nodded their heads.  “You’re looking at him.  I’m Jung Yunho.”  Looking at Boa, “I’m not a nerd and its Jung not Jong.  Now, both of you.  Turn around, pay attention to what others might say during this assembly, and  keep your mouth shut.”

Jaejoong and Boa turned around and they keep their mouth shut.  Then the emcee was calling Jung Yunho to come upstage to give his speech.  They watched Jung Yunho walked upstage, and started talking before they decided to talk about him.

“What an arrogant man.  Just because he was chosen to be our year representative to give the speech, doesn’t mean he can act like he was above us or something.” said Boa.  “Arrogant bastard.”continued Boa.

“Well, to be honest we might have been talking a bit too loud.”

“Are you taking his sides, Jaejoong?”

“No.”

“You are, aren’t you?”

“Let it go, Boa.”

“Fine.”

Both of them stop talking to each other when they spotted that Jung Yunho was looking at them from the stage while giving the speech.  To others, they might think that Jung Yunho was looking at the audiences, but for both of them, they knew it was a warning.  To keep their mouth shut.  To be quiet.

It was during the moment when Yunho ‘asked’ them to lower down their voices ‘politely’, Jaejoong had fall in love with him.  First it was just an attraction.  Because how many teenagers that posses that kind of charismatic aura, just by a glare he can shut people up.  The way he commanded both Jaejoong and Boa is another attribute to why Jaejoong feels attracted to Jung Yunho.

Jung Yunho has a complete package.  He has the looks and also brain.  He can participate in a soccer tournament today and scored with flying colors for his chemistry test the next day.  Without any difficulties.  He is also a total gentleman.  When his secret admirers told him, that they like him, he always rejects them politely.  At first the guys were like shunning him out, but after he helped them scored a few baskets in a basketball competition, he is the man.  All the teachers and the senior either like him or admire him.

That’s when the feel of attraction turned into feel of affection.

Since he knew Yunho had the potential to be a leader, a charismatic leader,  Jaejoong asked his cousin, Kim Heechul which were the Student Council’s Vice President at the moment to nominate Yunho’s name as the sophomore representative to the President, Choi Siwon because Jaejoong knew the President always follow what his cousin says.  That’s why the next year Yunho was chosen to be the representative.  There are no objections because they knew Yunho can do it.  And now, Yunho was appointed as the President of Student Council.

Back at the present time, all of the students are at the school hall for their first assembly in this year.  Four years has passed.  The freshman students are now senior.  They are now welcoming the freshmen.  Since the headmaster had to attend a conference, Yunho, the current President of Student Council was given the task to give the welcoming speech on behalf of the headmaster.  As Yunho was giving the speech, Jaejoong look at the freshmen section.  All the girls are having dreamy looks.  Their eye’s changed to hearts, swooning over Yunho.

Sighing, Jaejoong turned his gaze to Yunho.  Yunho looks has matured.  His physique has become manlier, so big, yet so cuddly just like a big teddy bear.  Jaejoong had dreams countless times; Yunho wrapping his strong arms around Jaejoong, holding him, hugging him, making Jaejoong feels save and secured.  Focusing on what Yunho had to say, Jaejoong clears his mind from unwanted thoughts. 

Jaejoong was drinking hot chocolate with his cousin before bed.  It was a kind of ritual for them before sleep.  They were talking about Jaejoong being a senior, when Heechul brought up topic of Yunho into their conversation.

“You should tell him how you feel.”

“But chullie-hyung…”whined Jaejoong.

“What the worse thing could happen?”

“He.Rejects.Me”

“But he also might accept you.”said Heechul in sing-song voice.

“Nahh..he woudnt.  Jung Yunho is straight.”

“That’s what Siwon had been telling to our schoolmates since freshman year until now.  But you know the truth, dear cousin of mine,” showing Jaejoong his couple ring, “Siwon belongs to me.”

“But..”

“Have you seen Yunho with a girl?  Intimately?”

“No”

“Is there any chances he might have girlfriend outside school?”

“No, because he is either busy with his study or busy with Student Council’s meeting.”

“So, there is chance he might swing the other way.”

“But..hyung.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, ”Jaejoong just tell Yunho how you feel about him.  If you’re afraid of being rejected in the public later being the school laughing stock, write him a confession letter.  But I suggest you speak directly to him.  Matter of heart should be discussed face to face to avoid misunderstanding.”  Glancing at the clock, “Its eleven pm now.  Go to sleep, Jae.  Think about what you got to do about your feelings toward Yunho.  Confessed or keep it.  Either way, I’m going to support you,”

“Okay.”

Walking upstairs, heading to his room, Jaejoong decided that he is going to confess to Yunho afterschool tomorrow.

AN: So...???