"December 13," she breathed out.

 

Although she wouldn't be drinking it at the moment, she wrapped a hand around her coffee. She was not disappointed, she was sad-and angry.

 

The café they were in was too happy for the occasion. The walls were painted baby pink and had white doodles on it. She loved it when she entered, she was hating it at the moment.

 

"I know. It came out fast, didn't it?" Sungmin rubbed the back of his neck in front of his best friend. He felt sorry even that he had just told her, though she was still the first one to know. Yet, he was happy at the same time. He was so sure of what he was doing, he was sure that she was the one.

 

"And I'm the first one to know?"

 

"Yes-"

 

"Is she having a baby, Sungmin?" She didn't look at him,  she was staring at his hand on the table. Her eyes were focused on the silver band, wrapping around his finger. She almost let a tear fell, but she scoffed it off instead.

 

"What? No!" She tore her gaze from his hand away when it curled into a fist. "Why do you even have that in mind?" Even though he was a bit mad, he was still polite, or he was trying to be.

 

"A wedding won't be rushed when nothing-not an accident-has happened between the both of you." She still didn't need to drink her coffee.

 

"Do you think I'm that irresponsible? We've known each other since high school, yet you treat me right now as if I were a stranger." He heard her sigh and he hadn't looked away from her, she was the only one not making any eye contact. "I wouldn't do that, I would wait for the woman I love."

 

That was it. She looked up with tears attempting to fall, and he saw that. He reached out for her hand but she withdrew it from the table. He called her name but she didn't respond.

 

 

"God, Sungmin." She was now crying, biting back the sobs. Sungmin knew he told her the wrong words, it made him uneasy, too.

 

He reached out to get her hands from her face. She shook it away again.

 

"What do you mean with 'wait', Sungmin?" she asked. "Wait for the woman you love? What happened three years ago, then?"

 

Silence. The man in question pulled back his hands and rested it on his lap. He sighed a sad kind of sigh. "Three years ago," he muttered.

 

"Yes. Or was 'wait for the woman I love' not part of your motto back then? It was not, was it?

 

"Because the woman you loved told you to wait." She was not supposed to remind him, but she wanted to. The pain inside her had let her spit that out. She even thought that she was the one more pained by her words than him.

 

Sungmin felt his eyes sting. He felt guilty, sad, and sorry, but he knew that this conversation would be over, that what he had with this girl was over. He didn't love her anymore. She still did.

 

"I'm sorry," she cleared lightly. The coffee did not look appetizing to her anymore. "I told you to wait for me, Sungmin.

 

"Studying for Japan meant a lot for me. I know you knew that, and I told you I would be back in two year's time." Culinary arts was her dream, and to earn a scholarship to study abroad exceeded her expectations. It was not like she'd wanted to leave her best friend behind, she'd thought, but certain things had risen up into priority (her priorities).

 

"I couldn't.. wait for you." It was heavy. The feeling of going back into the past and make yourself feel the memories again. Only the memories, but not the person in his perspective.

 

"You couldn't," she repeated, closing her eyes. She remembered how cold the airport lobby was when she was waiting for him, how she told the pedicab driver that she didn't know where to go (to Sungmin's condo or hers), how she heard that her best friend had been secretly dating a musical actress, how her world shattered, how she wished she had not taken the scholarship, how she wished she had a different set of priorities, and how she wished she had stayed for good. "I could've given you my answer."

 

"And that was supposed to be a 'yes'?"

 

She nodded slowly. "I planned to say it to you under the apple tree where you had asked me."

 

"But-"

 

"You don't love me anymore."

 

It was his turn to nod. She forced herself to take a tiny sip from the mug of coffee to prevent her from throwing another crying fit. Putting down her cup, she knew she had to move on, not forget, but move on. For her, forgetting meant that she wouldn't move on. It meant that she was going to wilt, water, and wilt the memories. She couldn't forget him, that was a given fact.

 

He gave her time to breathe and collect her thoughts. It was like her, he thought. She had this habit of recovering from pain through silence. He was there when she locked herself inside her apartment, crying whenever she knew she can. When she ran out of tears, she would lie down and wait until she found her voice to sob again. Sungmin was there every day, knocking. It was no use, though. Whenever he knocked, she would lose it all over again. The best option there was to leave her alone. A few weeks later, she approved the invitation from a business hotel to be the assistant head chef, and kept on living.

 

Until this day came.

 

She smiled, it was not bitter. The smile was a genuine one. "I love you, and I know you couldn't give that back to me. Not anymore, but I will be here, not literally, but as long as I'm your best friend, I will be here."

 

"Are you going somewhere?" he asked.

 

"I'll be going back to Japan, teach culinary arts to those who aspire for it. I was thinking if I should accept the offer these past few days, but now I think I will."

 

"Will you be back?" Would she attend the wedding?

 

"Of course." Her smile faltered for a second but she regained it. "I will be present on that day. That will be the day I can finally let you go, the day I will truly hand you my blessing."