I should have ended things with you first.

She hiccupped quietly under the sheet through her tears, remembering his words. She spent the whole night just curled up on bed and quietly cried, in the guest room of Na Young’s house. Her best friend didn’t question much, just took her into a hug when she appeared in front of their door with a teary face.

“C-c-can I stay in your guest room tonight?” Ji Hyun asked in a broken voice, clutching her phone and purse tightly in her chest - the only things she took along when she dashed out of her house.

“Of course honey.” Na Young embraced her again. “You’re always welcomed here.”

She nodded briefly at Seunghyun without looking at him, disappeared behind the guest room, and stayed there until now. She didn’t know how many hours had passed.

“Ji Hyun?” Na Young voice spoke softly at the other side of the door.

“Come in.” She cleared her voice and sat up.

“Oh s h i t…. look at you.” Her best friend hissed after closing the door. “Why are you looking like this?”

Yeah, she must have looked like a mess. She didn’t know how many hours had passed since she started to cry. Na Young sat down beside her, using her slender fingers to wipe off Ji Hyun’s tears. “Your eyes are all puffed.” She said worriedly.

Ji Hyun just smiled weakly.

“You wanna talk about it?” Na Young asked softly. Her friend was always such an angel like that.

They knew each other since university. Ji Hyun introduced Na Young to Seunghyun, by that time she and Jiyong was dating for about a year or so. The charisma movie star at first was shy and slow to his true feelings, and Na Young had to be the one challenging his nerves for him to confess his feelings. They married one year after Ji Hyun and Ji Yong’s wedding, and 3 years later, after Seunghyun came back from his military service, little Min Woo was born. They were told to be the best idol family, everyone got jealous with them.

Na Young had her own problems too, but mostly it’s because of Seunghyun’s being stubborn, and his fangirls. But after Min Woo was born, everything became less chaos. Seunghyun became less childish because he was a father now, and seeing how happy he was, his fangirls seemed to be more understanding. They even smiled and asked for Na Young’s photo with them.

“Ji Yong wants a divorce.” Ji Hyun sniffed, slipped back onto the mattress.

“WHAT?” Na Young shouted, and Ji Hyun was startled. She quickly sat up and covered her friend’s mouth.

“Be quiet! You’ll wake up Seunghyun and Min Woo!” She hissed.

“After his shamed affair with that Jang Eun Hye, he has the gut to ask you to divorce?” Na Young asked angrily. She pulled out her phone, ready to the action. “I don’t care if it’s 3AM now. I have to kill him.”

“Don’t…” Ji Hyun stopped her. “Let him sleep, he barely gets any sleep these days.”

“Are you serious?” Na Young cast her an annoyed look. “If he can sleep now, I will doubt his manner.”

“Eun Hye got pregnant.” Ji Hyun said quietly, rubbing her face in her palms.

She heard Na Young took a sharp intake, before a pair of arms wrapped around her shoulders, pulled her into another tight embrace. Na Young caressed her head, whispered nonsense things to her ears, while Ji Hyun just let all the pressures out, one again cried like a child just lost her favorite dolls.

When Na Young noticed the sobs had died down, she pulled Ji Hyun back. Her dear friend had fallen into sleep in the middle of the cry, or maybe just because she was exhausted, mentally, emotionally and physically.

Tucking the poor girl carefully under the blanket, Na Young turned off the light, carefully slipped out of the room and quietly returned to her own bedroom.

“You’re still awake?” She surprised seeing Seunghyun who was still up, reading a book.

“You’re not here.” He replied simply, put down the book and turned off the light. “How is she?”

“Not good.” Na Young sighed, slipped into the blanket and nestled herself to Seunghyun. “I don’t know, Seunghyun. I’m scared.” She looked up at him, worry showed in eyes.

“About what?” Seunghyun tucked her tighter in his arm, squeezed her while landing a soft kiss on her forehead.

“Ji Yong and Ji Hyun.” She said. “They might not make it through this time.”

Seunghyun’s silence just confirmed her worry. “Has you talked to Jiyong?” She asked after a while.

“No. Why?” He turned to face her with a frown.

“He didn’t even call to ask where his wife is?” Na Young narrowed her eyes.

Seunghyun bit his lips. “No, he hasn’t called me.”

“Bastard.” Na Young murmured, snuggled closer to her husband. “I’ll kill him tomorrow.”

“Maybe he asked someone else.” Seunghyun tried to defend his best friend.

“Jang Eun Hye is pregnant, and he wants a divorce with Ji Hyun.” Na Young said in a cold voice. “I swear tomorrow he will die in my hands. And I need to kill Ji Hyun too, for even dared to defend him.” She embraced Seunghyun tighter. “Now sleep, Mr. Choi.”

Choi Seunghyun frowned. Suddenly, he felt painful in the heart. Ji Hyun, to him, was like his little sister. And Ji Yong, to him, was like his little brother. He knew Ji Hyun even before the two got to know each other, and was so happy when finding out that the girl Ji Yong gonna get married was Ji Hyun. He was glad the man she chose was Ji Yong, since he knew no man - even himself - could take care of his girl as devotedly as Ji Yong.

But their marriage was slowly went wrong for the past months because of the pressure of becoming parents. In their first years, they even used protection because Ji Yong was on his peak of career, and he didn’t want Ji Hyun to be pregnant at that time, since if his wife got pregnant, he wanted to devote all his time. Then, it was Ji Yong’s turn - along with Seunghyun - to attend the army service. Everything was put off for more years. They just came back last year, and Ji Yong started to think about having children. But until now, nearly 3 years had passed, they still didn’t have any child no matter how hard they tried. Sometimes he caught Ji Yong gazed at his Min Woo with sad eyes, and he honestly didn’t know how to comfort him. Things got worse when recently, Youngbae and his wife announced their expected child. They got married for nearly a year now. Ji Yong became quieter and quieter since then.

They were about to advise him to do some check-ups to see what to do next, but this thing with Jang Eun Hye happened.

Jang Eun Hye maybe, no, she was Ji Yong’s longest girlfriend. They dated for about 4-5 years, even went to the point of getting married, if not because of Eun Hye’s parents' disapproval. They didn’t like the G-Dragon, and Eun Hye just could not go against them. They broke up, and Ji Yong was broken nearly completely. When he was about to numb all his emotions, Ji Hyun appeared and lifted him up. Or at least those were what Seunghyun knew from Ji Yong’s words to him.

But now the Jang Eun Hye was back, and it seemed she rekindled her relationship or something like that.

Seunghyun tightened his grip around Na Young, suddenly afraid to lose her, even though she was secured safely in his arms. No, he would treasure Na Young and little Min Woo, and their future children, his family, forever, with all his strength.

----

The ringing sound pulled Ji Hyun out of her deep slumber. Trying open her eyes, she noticed the heaviness on them. They must have swollen so much now.

Trying to read the screen, she picked up the call. “U-unnie.” She said hoarsely.

“Ji Hyun! Are you alright? Where are you now?” Dami - Ji Yong’s sister - sounded alarmed.

“I’m alright.” Ji Hyun could not recognize her own voice anymore.

“Why your voice sounds so weird? Where are you? I’m at your home but Ji Yong said you didn’t come home last night?” Dami said worriedly.

“I’m with my friend.” She mumbled. “What are you looking me for unnie?” She asked, closing her eyes. “If it’s not urgent, can I call you later? I…..I wanna sleep more.”

“Wait, we need to talk! Ji Hyun? Ji Hyun! Ji Hyun? Do you hear me?” Dami’s voice was deafened when Ji Hyun already drifted back to her sleep.

----

“Took him long enough.” Na Young scoffed when she saw who was the one pressing the door bell.

“Easy, don’t kill him yet. We need to sort things out first.” Seunghyun came to relax his wife. He put his hands on her shoulders and started massaging them. “Let him in, and let me talk to him. You go checking Ji Hyun.”

“She is still asleep, I just checked.” Na Young said in a stern voice, allowed Ji Yong to enter the Choi mansion. “There are red circles around her eyes, God knows how much she cried last night. She even passed out while crying on my shoulders.”  

They were surprised seeing who was with Ji Yong. “Noona!” Seunghyun bowed while his wife did the same. “Unnie!” Na Young smiled at the collected woman.

“Hello you two.” Dami smiled back briefly. “Is Ji Hyun here?”

“Yes… But she is still sleeping.” Na Young sighed. She glared at Ji Yong who was avoiding her gaze.

“Let me see.” Dami stormed inside the house while Na Young hastily followed her to show her the guest room.

---

“Why is she sleeping too much?” Dami questioned in confusion, brushing Ji Hyun’s hair. She sighed, seeing a pink half-circle around each of her eyes. “She must cry a lot, didn’t she?”

Na Young nodded. “She’s emotionally exhausted, and each time like that, she will sleep like for hours. It’s been awhile since she had this. Actually, I didn’t hear her tell me about having it for the recent years.”

“I guess she knew about Jang Eun Hye now?” Dami asked with another deep sigh.

Na Young wasn’t sure if Dami knew about the pregnancy, so she just nodded.

“Mom and dad are angry, because we didn’t raise him to be an unfaithful husband. When he was single, he could do anything he wanted, we didn’t care or try to step in. It’s his privacy. But now he’s a married man, he has to have responsibility to his family, to his wife.” Dami said in an angry voice.

“He wants to divorce, do you know that unnie?” Na Young felt like a kid telling her mom about something her sibling did wrong, which might be true in a way anyway.

“W-w-what?” Dami was taken aback, snapped her head at Na Young. “He wants what?” She asked in an incredulous tone.

“I think Ji Hyun is broken because Ji Yong wanna divorce with her more than because of that Jang Eun Hye affair.” Actually the pregnancy might be the main reason, though.

Dami abruptly stood up, left the room in a flash. Hastily, Na Young quickly stood up and followed her.

Ji Hyun opened her eyes, staring at the white blanket. She knew everything gonna come to an end soon, but she didn’t wanna approach it, for now. The more she could delay, the better.

----

Dami didn’t waste a second. Just when she saw Jiyong, who was standing there in the middle of the living room talking quietly with Seunghyun, she smacked his head.

“Ahhhhhhhhh noona!” Ji Yong hissed and stepped back, holding his head and groaned in pain. “What’s your problem now?” A fact everyone who closed to Ji Yong all knew, one of the things he feared most in his life was his sister’s smacks.

“Is it true you want to divorce?” She asked angrily.

Jiyong bit his lips while avoiding Dami’s stare.

“What’s wrong? Just a few months ago, you said to me that you would do anything to make Ji Hyun happy. Where did that promise go?”

“We’re not working anymore, it's been a while noona.” Jiyong said with a sigh, threw himself onto the sofa. “We thought we could live happily without children, but by looking our friends and people around us, we just could not take it anymore. This is what will make us happier, or at least I think so. ”

“We? Or just you?” Na Young asked in a cold voice. “And are you blaming us becoming parents now?”

“No.” Jiyong groaned. “Please, Na Young, please, this is our problem.” He cast her a meaningful look. “You have a perfect family with Seunghyun hyung, you don’t understand.”

“Yours is perfect too!” Na Young nearly screamed with anger. “What is -i-n-g wrong with you?”

“Choi Na Young!” Her husband cut in sharply. He hated it when she swore, especially she’s a mother now. “Watch your mouth.”

“Min Woo isn’t home. Beside, you know I won’t swear unless I cannot stand it anymore.” She dismissed him. “Tell me, Ji Yong, what exactly did Ji Hyun do so wrong ly to you? Beside being a devoted wife and loving you too much?”

“There’s nothing about right or wrong here, ok?” Jiyong said annoyingly. “Look, I’m not coming here to argue with you.”

“What do you expect by ending things with Ji Hyun?” Dami narrowed her eyes. “Don’t tell me you plan on marrying that girl.”

“She has a name, ok?” Jiyong groaned. “And no, I expect nothing. I just think it’s not right to….when I’m still a married man.” He avoided both Dami’s and Na Young’s stare.

“WHO SAID THAT YOU CAN CHEAT YOUR WIFE?” Dami nearly roared, making Na Young jump and Seunghyun grimace. “Oh God Jiyong, yes, what the is wrong with you?”

“Eun Hye is pregnant!” He nearly shouted back. “I cannot leave my expecting child alone like that.” He said with pleading eyes to Dami, like he begged for his sister to understand.

“W-w-what?” Dami stammered. She stumbled back, and Na Young had to steady her. “What did you just say?”

“She’s pregnant for 9 weeks already.” Ji Yong started to speak. “And I know it’s wrong, but I just cannot leave Eun Hye like that, especially when I need a child like this. And me and Ji Hyun don’t really work for a very long time, so it’s better if we just part.”

“Since when all this happened?” Dami asked in a shaky voice.

“We met again about 6 months ago, and I started to..rekindle things with her a few months later, I think.” Jiyong said in a small voice.

Dami looked around, as if finding something. “I have to kill you.” She said in a low voice. “No wonder why her eyes are that red. Oh God please forgive for my sin but I have to kill this brother of mine.” It looked like she was ranting to herself.

Na Young was alarmed, trying to calm Dami down, while Jiyong - who never took his sister’s threads lightly - came to hide behind Seunghyun’s back.

“Can we talk in private?”

Everyone and everything was halted when Ji Hyun’s dry voice was spoken.  She stood there, holding herself. She had enough of this conversation. If she had to hear Ji yong defending his mistress one more time, or how wrongly their marriage had gone, she might gone crazy.

After some more arguments, mostly from Na Young who refused to let Ji Hyun to speak alone with Ji Yong, they were left alone in the guest room. Ji Hyun went back to the bed, since she was strangely broken to stand, and Ji Yong sat on the edge.

“You really want us to separate?” Ji Hyun asked in a small voice after being gazed by Ji Yong for 5 good minutes.

“I think it’s the best for us.” Jiyong slowly said. He took her hands in his, slightly squeezed it. “Ji Hyun, I love you, I still do. But, I don’t think I can be both husband and lover at the same time.” He looked at her with sincerity. “You know me, you know I can’t be that kind of man to the woman I love.”

She looked into his face, the face she adored so much each day, ever since she got to know him. Every single morning waking up beside him, she always took several minutes to look at his sleeping face. She always loved his sleeping face, he looked just like a child. He was a baby himself anyway, most of the time, especially when they were still happy. She remembered how comfortable his face looked in his sleeps, or how his brows knitted together whenever he was dreaming of something. Or the way he unconsciously wrapped his arms around her body to snuggle closer. She didn’t know that one day, all those precious moments would be just memories.

“How’s Eun Hye?” She asked.

Ji Yong was taken aback by her sudden question. “She’s fine…” He replied while scratching his head. “She seems to have some morning problems, but it’s normal for pregnant women. The doctor said so.”

There was something in his eyes, something Ji Hyun never saw before. It was excitement. Excitement for a child, his child.

“I’m sorry.” She could not help it, the tears. They were rolling down her face suddenly, but she quickly wiped them away. “I’m sorry for not being able to bring that happiness to you. I’m sorry.” She cried harder while still wiping her eyes.

“Ji Hyun…” He was about to embrace her but she retracted.

“No….just...no, please.” She could not stand it if he embraced her now. It was just pity. She extracted herself far away from him as much as possible. “If you really want it, let’s divorce then.” She said in a hoarse voice.

He didn’t say anything, just looked at her with a torn expression. “Ji Hyun, I don’t know how to make you feel better about this.” He said with pleading eyes. “I am really sorry for things to be like this, but….”

“I understand.” She sniffed and cleared . “Just give me the files, I’ll sign them. The rest can be done between our lawyers.” She laid back to the mattress, her back was to him. “I’ll take my things later.”

“No, you just stay at our house.” Ji Yong protested.

Seeing no response from her, Ji Yong sighed. “Take more rest, you look awful.” He caressed her hair and left the room.

“Ji Yong….” Ji Hyun called quietly just before he the knob. “Are you….” She said in a dry voice. “Are you sure about the baby?”

There was a dead moment of silence, and Ji Hyun felt a strange emotion came from Ji Yong. She was not quite sure, but she thought he got angry with that question.

“Everyone knows how badly we want a child.” She continued when she heard nothing from him. “And we know that there is nothing wrong with me.”

Jiyong was silent for a while, until he spoke in a collected and curt voice. "I don't wanna hurt you like this, but, Ji Hyun, I know what I did.” Then he turned the knob and walked away.

____________

A/N:

1. I know Korean married women don't take their husband's last name like in the Western or the US, but, I like it, the taking-after-your-husband's-last-name you know. It's very endearing. I would love that too...

2. I am sorry if this story is sensitive and upset anyone of you. I really am. I just think, it's really a great plot to develop for a fiction.

3. About this sensitive issue, I think, it's pretty unfair, when married couples tried but still havent been able to conceive a baby, the blame usually goes to the wife. (or at least it's what most of people in my homeland do) anyone with a proper education would have known that, it takes two to create another life, so the responsibility is divided into two equal parts. It's just my opinion.