“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step” -Lao Tzu

Life isn’t easy; everyone knows that... well most do. Life doesn’t just hand you things because you want it; you work for it. Life isn’t always fun and games; it’s scary and unknown. Life tends to throw lemons at you, but can you really make lemonade with it?

Taeyeon was a happy kid as she was growing up. Her parents did everything they could to keep her happy. If it meant buying her the newly released game console on the market; they’d find the budget to get it. Taeyeon was well liked. She was different, but people still liked her.

Growing up Taeyeon was very boyish. She liked to wear boy clothes, she liked playing with toys that didn’t generally fit her gender role. Whenever she played with her friends, she was always the dad or the brother. She was just completely playing the opposite role of her biological . Her parents didn’t think much of it, they thought it was just a phase that would pass.

Taeyeon’s mother would consistently bargain with her about wearing more girlier things. She on the other hand would just roll her eyes and continue making her way towards the boys section. This went on until she was in middle school. Her mother and her consistently fought over what clothes to wear; Mrs. Kim grew weary soon.

Yet Taeyeon still had such boyish antics. Even throughout her middle school years. Her school friends didn't think much of it, Taeyeon was like that ever since. Then it came to the high school years. It was a bigger school, different people. It was a building of teenagers going through puberty. Which, made Taeyeon feel depressed.

It was her freshman year and she was anxious. During the beginning of the year she didn’t think much of anything. But by the end of the year, she realized that she wasn’t happy with herself. She looked at all the other boys in her grade, and she realized that all of them were not the same as they were in the beginning of the year. Most of them had grown a foot taller and now were in the making of growing beards. It had made her life miserable.

Yet by her sophomore year... she finally realized who she was. She was a female to male transgender. It all made sense to her. She was biologically female yes, but she identifies as male. She wants to look like all the other guys, because that’s her. But she needed to make that step before she could finally be happy.

She remembers it well. Writing a letter to her parents of all her struggles. She had to clearly state in her letter that she was really a he. Taeyeon is a boy. He believes that he is a male, despite the fact that he had two lumps of fat on his chest and nothing between his legs. But in order to become the guy he wants to be, he needed to get past his parents.

He wanted to start hormone replacement therapy, which is doctor prescribed, so instead of estrogen in his body he had testosterone. Going through hormone replacement therapy would consist of fats being redistributed in the body to give him a more masculine look. Taeyeon could become muscular and he could start growing a beard. What Taeyeon was most excited about starting hormone replacement therapy is that he would have a lower voice. People would finally stop thinking he’s a pre-teen who hasn’t gone through puberty. He can finally look his age.

But of course things didn’t come easy. He had to face his parents’ point of view. He had to face their opinions. To his relief his friends stormed with positive support. He had their backs and of course he will always have theirs. To his dismay, he would have to wait until he could start his hormone replacement therapy.

Times were tough until he met her. He wasn’t expecting to love her. He wasn’t expecting for her to love him. Most importantly, he didn’t think she was going to love him for him. Yet, here she was, the girl he thought was different, was loving him for all that he is and all that he was. Such unexpected love had brought his self esteem so much higher.

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage,” -Lao Tzu

She was the reason he continued to live. She was the reason for his grown patience to wait for his testosterone. She had given him so much strength. She had given him the courage to face his greatest fears. If it wasn’t for her, he probably wouldn’t be the happy lad he is now.