Hurt

Kyuhyun swore it hurt a lot. He tried to conceal it but it still hurt. He had bottles of red wine and smoked three boxes of cigarettes. He did his best to forget it. He did his best to say it’s okay when it comes to his favorite hyung’s happiness. He did it. He hid it well. He smiled when his hyung told the news. He laughed at his hyung’s jokes about that girl. He just needs time to think. He needs time to free his mind and how to continue his life. Even it was too painful, he pretended like it was nothing. Even he wanted to cry, he smiled widely. He did it. He did his best. He laughed. Chwang had told her to move on. Chwang had tried his best to entertain him. Mission to entertain Mr. Kyukyu, as Chwang called it. Ryeong had told him to stop listening to Suzy’s ballad. “That is bad for your heart.” Ryeong understood. He acknowledged his pain. Everyone did but, his favorite hyung. His favorite hyung was smiling happily when he told him the news. He said he likes the way that girl touches his forehead. They had a date. They drank wine together. His hyung and that girl. They did. Kyuhyun swore that hurt him to know that his hyung went drinking with other than him. Especially, when his hyung loves that girl more than him. Especially, when that girl had replaced his position in his hyung’s heart. Especially, when he was replaced. He hates the feeling about it. He hates the fact that his hyung is not his anymore.

“You changed a lot, Kyuhyun-ah.”

Kyuhyun smiled bitterly. He said he changed. He said he changed but it turned out that he was the one who did it. His hyung changed when he knew the girl. He should have never told him to accept it. He had a bad feeling about it from the start.

“Kyuhyun-ah! I got it! D’artagnan! I got the role! Finally!”

His hyung jumped like a baby that time. He could only congratulate him. He could only be happy because his hyung was happy.

“Kyuhyun-ah, did you hear? Sungmin hyung got a girlfriend.”

That hurt. He was hurt. That hurt more because he knew it through someone else. His hyung came home with red eyes and hugged him. He was sorry. He hates it. He should not be sorry. He should be happy. It’s not like he didn’t know the girl. He met the girl. He knew her. He saw her a lot. They had the same stage. He didn’t know anything. He was ing clueless.  He hates the situation.

He had enough.

Kyuhyun sighed heavily and let another bitter smile. He needs to go back. They were ed up. They need him. He shouldn’t be selfish. He sighed when he went back to the living room. The room was empty. He found no one. What a relief. He didn’t need to face them anymore. The situation was intse when he left the room to light a fire. He would take a good sleep. He needs it. He went in to his room and got surprised.

“Oh, Kyuhyun-ah?”

His hyung was on his bed, crying.

“Why are you here? I think you need to sleep, hyung.” Kyuhyun acted like it was nothing to see his hyung cried when actually he wanted to hug him and kissed him. He wanted to say goodnight and kissed his eyes again. He missed his hyung’s yells when he screamed too loud because of his games.

“Oh, I guess I cannot sleep on the same bed with you, anymore?” Sungmin wiped his tears and smiled. Ouch. That was hurt. He was not prepared.

“Hyung, you chose it yourself. I’m sorry... please. I need to sleep.” Kyuhyun could not think right. He just needs to let his frustrations.

Sungmin smiled even more but, that hurt even more to be seen.

“Yeah... I guess, I’m disturbing you.” Sungmin stood up. He walked to the door as if he was waiting Kyuhyun to stop him to leave.

“Ah.. hyung. Wait.” Kyuhyun voiced echoed then Sungmin turned around slowly with a smile.

“Yes?” Kyuhyun could see hope in Sungmin’s eyes as if he regretted everything.

“You know, I just want to say... jaljayo, Minimi hyung.” Kyuhyun laughed awkwardly. Then, they remained silent for a couple of minutes. Sungmin was the one who broke it, “Ah... yes... ye-s... good night. Sweet dreams, Kyuhyun-ah.” He said only to make the situation went more awkward.

“Yeah...” Kyuhyun smiled. He did it right. Sungmin pushed him, right? He could assume that his hyung doesn’t want him anymore, right?

“I guess, I’ll leave now... ah... bye...” Sungmin held the door already but he stood still for a minute. Kyuhyun stayed calmed until Sungmin turned back again with tears on his face.

“I’m sorry, Kyu. I think I’ve myself by hurting you. I-I-I do-n’t deserve to say this but, sorry.” Sungmin said it and went out. He blamed the door and ran straight to his room. That was right. He did right. They should end it like this.

“Please be happy, hyung.” Kyuhyun said as he wiped his tears. They’ll be okay. Time will wash the pain. They’ll forget today’s pain. Although, it takes time to ease the pain. Time will erase it.

Fin.

It was just my random thought hahaha. Take it easy yo.