Sehun is sitting down at an event.

His true love luhan is sitting to his left with baozi, and an ahjussi is sitting to his right.

Just then, and idea hits Sehun.

His type has always been older men, and everyone knows it.

Tonight Luhan isn't making good eye contact because Sehun found out about his affair with Xiumin this morning.

//Flashback//

"How could you Hyung?" Sehun asks choking back tears.

"I'm sorry baby, I still love you. Xiumin makes me feel more like a man with his Sohee face and shorter height."

...

"Okay fair enough."

"You tower over me now Maknae, but you will always be my first true love."

"Watherver."

"Please don't be mad. There is enough Lulu to go around. I need him because he makes me feel manly.

Being manly is my number one priority. "

"But I thought your ideal thype was me. Long hair, white skin, and a thmall mouth."

"Well..."

"Is my mouth not small enough for you LuLu?!"

"Ummm... you forgot quiet."

Sehun feels defeated, because nobody can out-silence Xiumin.

Xiumin has won this round.

//Present//

Sehun remembers this when he sees Luhan whispering sweet nothing's into Xiumins ear.

So he decides to make Luhan jealous by flirting with the stud muffin to his right.

Sehun makes eye contact with the ahjussi and flashes a y smirk.

That ought to get Luhan's attention.

Mision fail, and the Ahjussi just looks confused.

Of course he is, Sehun thinks. Of course he is, but not for long.

That night Sehun does aegyo to his manager for the Ahjussi's number.