Reaching… reaching that light… but still faraway… where should I’ve been headed to? What should I do? Why should I reach that brightest, enormous light rather than darkness one? Which path should I choose? How should I cross it, rather than walking or crawling? Flying? Hiding? Those unanswered questions had been remaining from my mind… in one of my dreams from sleeping… is there any answer to make… for choosing these paths that I should wisely choose?

If the answers are that many, or just one… I prefer two options… whether I should look the darkness in a temporary time; or just I go to that light-path….

… And I woke up, all of sudden, without knowing it.

“Kila~ Wake up~ Time for heading to primary school~”

Mom nags me all along, trying to wake me up from amnesia. I don’t even know why in such a young age that I couldn’t have any full sleeps nowadays… maybe because I am that busy person… since I’m in Year 4: full of curricular & co-curricular activities.

“Yes, Umi~ I’ve got to bath now~”

These are my habits every day of my lifetime. Almost all of it like a housemaid; and I don’t even care about it, because it’s my own life of independence for future’s stake.

Without complaining, progressing to bath, eat breakfast and go to the school by school bus. A night before going there, always ironing school clothes, packing textbooks and notes like a military packs (not a doubt after all… great school teachers for giving a d**n[s]), and lastly for not least; revising of what had been taught. I’m that person.

“Akilah!”

“Yes, Umi?”

“Don’t forget to pray al-Kahf while on the way to school, okay?”

“Yes, Umi… I won’t forget that.”

And not to mention… my family is not that religious but still aware of goods and bads, and I’m already grateful of it. When the bus moves onward from my home, my mom waves as a sign of ‘Bye, take care of yourself’ for me, so I wave her back as ‘I always do, Umi’ sign. Depends on mom’s intuitions… our moms are always right, no matter how the situations are.

While on my way to the school, I spend my time by reading storybooks while hearing music, rather than asking friends how would they do and talking their interest stuffs… because I live that way. Not sure to say this, but being alone is usual for me… is like, ‘fun’; for me. Until a schoolboy shows up by looking for empty seats (I’m the only one who has that seat), then sits beside me without my permission.

“Stranger… ask for permission next time. Don’t ever talk to me.”

I’ve had that first conversation with someone I don’t really know… without realizing it, while reading. For the first time… in my life… like, what the hell am I doing right now?

“Thanks for reminding me. I should be careful next time when I want to sit beside someone, like you.”

After finishing reading 5 chapters in a few minutes, I look at his face for a few seconds… white pale skin tone with cute facial figure. I assume that he would be a handsome guy in future…

Wait… what am I thinking? Am I in delusional thought or something? Am I in a dream? That cute schoolboy, beside me? I’m slapping my face for a few times whether I’m in a dream or somewhat… but, I’m in a reality… then, is he my idol, role model for future or something? Oh my gosh, like I do right now…

“Girl, are you okay? Is anything wrong with you?”

I’m snapping out of these thoughts after he questioned me.

“Oh, no! Of course I’m OK. Ha ha ha! But… can I ask something?”

All of students’ passengers from this bus surprise by my reaction so they gaze at me and him as of now.

“… sure.”

“Are you… Korean? Japanese?”

And ended up with burst of laughter that comes from his mouth. Wait… is he not? At all? Then what kind of nationality is he? Now that confuses me more…

“Then… what are you?”

“I’m Malaysian, girl! I can’t stand for this… am I look alike those nationalities? Now that’s kind of new and bizarre for me…”

“But… you do look alike Korean or Japanese… or am I wrong?”

“Yes…. girl. Don’t you believe me? I was born from KL, but a little, quite right from you… I was staying from South Korea 9 years after I was born before going back here, for family reasons.”

“Oh… so that’s why your skin tone look like those…”

“… are you envy? You do look a little black though.”

Every single students sheepishly laughing in silent after hearing these statements from that schoolboy.

“Don’t tease me like that!! I’m white too! It’s just that I always exposing from sunlight every single day, that doesn’t mean I have that kind of disadvantage! Don’t ever underestimate of girls!”

“OK! I get it, I get it…”

At the same time, they nod each other as they understand what I’ve said, then back to normal where they’re chatting as of usual.

“But… I’m not seeing you before… if I recount back from these 3 years…”

“I’m a transfer student, starts from today. You see… I’m Year 4, 4 Ace: Nur Kamaruddin.”

“Oh, same class! I see… My given name, Nazmin Akilah. Call me Naz or Aki.”

“Call me Mar. If there’s notes from teachers that had been given, let me know.”

 “Deal^^”

That’s how first friendship begins… from the school bus. I wish that my time would stop from that moment… where we both just sit and chat, asking what would we do as stud