“So..where..is she?” you brace your self to ask.

“hmm?” he gives you questioning look.

“Your girl friend, of course, Gayoon?”

“She have something to do so..she, she can’t come with me” he says, you nod, understanding the reason. Awkward silent come back again between you and him. “Do you still watch that movie?”

“hmm?”

“Apple of my eye?” he smiles at you. Make the situation warm again.

You don’t believe he asks you that, actually you don’t believe he still remember that. You chuckle and nod your head. “Sometimes”

“I remember, you covered your eyes with your hands and peeked from behind your finger” he said as he laugh.

“Yah…!” You remember, you always cover your eyes when you watch the film because the main character loved to walk and love to do some activities. You thought that film is made from the boys perspective, so there are some dirty scene, but it’s worthy to be watched. And you love it much.

It tells about a popular and clever student named Chai yi and mischievous boy named Ko Teng, just like the usual romance film, they became best friend, then they falling in love, once he asked her is she love him or not but instead getting her answer, he decided that he would rather not hear her answer. Time goes on, they broke up and never contacted each other till 921 earthquake, Ko Teng called her just to find out if she’s okay. But then Chia yi called him later to say that she’d getting married. It end up with a wedding scene where all of their bestfriend gathered and making jokes and trying to embarrass her husband. The past emotions have transformed into deep friendship and serenity.

 “..you always tell me your favorite part, even we have seen it so many time” he says as he looking away. You smiled slightly as you remember you’ll always tell him your favorite part and he just nodded his head like you told him at the first time. You can feel a feeling you can’t describe in your heart, but you know it for sure, it hurts. Guilty, love, pain, regret, turned to one.

“Does he let you..?” he leave his word hanging. He stares at you deeply before continue his word “Does he let you tell him your favorite part when you’ve seen it a million time?” you were taken aback at his question. You avoid his stare before nod your head slightly. In fact your boy friend had once company you to watch that movie, but he ended up sleeping beside you, exhausted because of his work. Since that you never asked him to watch the film with you, you always watch that film alone.

“Good then, because I will take you back if he doesn’t treat you better than me” he laugh at you but somehow you can hear pain from his laugh. The only thing you can do is smile.

“Doojoon…” you call his name softly, guilty is taking over your self now.

“Does he hold you when you cry… like the way I did?” he ask again. You love it the most when he was comforting you. His arms were the place you feel most safe. He would your back gently as he didn’t bother to ask or say anything till you open your own self and tell him. Jonghyun…he and Doojoon were different, you do not mean to compare both of him, but instead comforting and hold you first, Jonghyun would ask you what’s going and trying to find the solution first. But we all know, sometimes we do not neet solution we just need a pair of arms that comfort us as they can say everything is gonna be okay.

You didn’t answer him, silent took over again.

“Doojoon…” he turned his head at you “you..you don’t hate me?” you  finally ask that question after regaining all of your courages. He stares at you for a while, before chuckle bitterly.

“how can you think I hate you after all this time I…”

“Jagiya,” a voice interrupt him. You turn your head to your boyfriend direction. You can see he walks closer to you and Doojoon. Your heart thump like crazy, you never thought that you’ll stand between two men you love. “Ahh..Doojoon hyung, you’re here too?” he asks as he see Doojoon who sit on the other side of the bench. Doojoon only nod his head slightly. “..don’t tell me you’ve known each other??” he says with bright smile on his face.

“We’re friend…college” you say it first, afraid that Doojoon will tell something else.

“Whoo…now I believe world is not that large. You two must be talking a lot about the past, hmm?” he says as he bent down and put his head near your ear as he linger his arms around you “but…I have to take her now from you hyung, I need her to dance with me” he says as he staring at you and help you stand up. You only reply him with smile. “See you, Hyung” he says as he pull you inside the hall, you turn your head to Doojoon’s but all you can see is his back. He doesn’t even took a glance of you when you’re gone.

“You already take her when I never had a chance to take her, Jonghyun” he mumbled to himself.

***

Doojoon can see you and Jonghyung dance. His arms are around your waist, and you put your arms around his neck as you smile at whatever he says. Close to you, it’s your favorite song. He remember at that time.

both of you were on his apartment, he’s playing video game, and you didn’t do anything so you decided to turn on the radio. Slowly music fill the room and you jumped from no where at his side and put away the controller in his hands and make him dance with you.

“Yah…what are … yah…” he yelled in annoying because you had ended his game but didn’t rejected what were you doing.

“Sshh…” you said as you keep moving with him.

“Sshh what?”

“it’s my favorite song. I want to dance this song in my wedding day”

Since that day, he’s practicing so hard till he can sing that song well. In the night when nobody see, he also practiced his dance skill, he wished he could be a good partner for you to dance.

“Does he know that this is your favorite song ____-ah? Can he sing it for you? Did he take many night to practice his skill just to dance with you? Does he do all these things, like I used to? Will he love you like I love you?” he take a sip of his drink. He loved you and still love you, but tonight he feel like he has been cheated. You’re the one who’s on his mind, the one who’s on his heart, the one that once he asked to be his girlfriend and say no because she’s afraid to being in love, because scared of being hurt, now…he can see that girl were falling in love. Not him, but someone else. A man that may be didn’t love her as much as like he loved her.

“If  the answer of all my question is right, promise me you won’t throw it all away ____-ah, just like you used to. Wish you happy” he mumbled to him self before he drink the rest of his wine in one shot before leaving the wedding.

***

“Oppa...do you know Gayoon unnie?” you ask as you keep your move to his move.

“Gayoon?” you nodded your head.

“Doojoon’s girlfriend? She’s one of my friend in college too” you say, can’t help but curious because when you asked Doojoon about her, you can feel something’s not right.

Jonghyun shake his head “Ani..i never heard Hyung had a girlfriend” he says made your eyes widen. “Waeyo?”

“A-ani..i’m the one who settled the date for them”

“Hmm..Yonghwa hyung said that he didn’t date a girlfriend since his bestfriend left him. he loves her much, some people say she loves him too, but she’s afraid of somewhat. He’s still love her I think so he didn’t have even a date” Jonghyun added made your self blank and stumble. “Ahh..are you okay? What’s goin on?”

“Ani..oppa, I just slip” you fake a smile.

***

*Slipped because of your past ____-ah? I have knonw that the girl is you, his bestfriend is you, but…I won’t let you go. I’m sorry Doojoon hyung, she’s mine now*

That day

Doojoon were arrived at the usual café you and him go often. He scans the whole café to find you but you’re not there. A girl waves her hand at him. Gayoon. He smiles as he walk to her table.

“H-hey…doojoon” she greets him shyly.

“hey, what are you doing here?”

“I…”

“Ah..do you see _____-ah, she said she wanted to meet me here” He cut her as he looks around again. She shooks her head, didn’t say a word but blushing. “really? Aish…she must be late, she said she has something for me”he said make her blushing more.

“A..doojoon, she won’t be here” she says, make doojoon confuse, “that something is…” doojoon gives her a questioning look. “ is…this date, me and you, I asked to help me have a date with…you” she confesses. But doojoon only stares blankly, doesn’t believe at what he have just heard.

“date?” she nodded *how..could you do this to me ____-ah, you knew my feeling, aish…did I make you uncomfortable? Do you want me to forget you? Okay, if that’s what you want* he did that date with Gayoon. They talked, eat meal, joking, and whatever people do on the first date,

“I like you from the very first time we met but I have no brave to say that, so..”

“Sorry but I love ___-ah” he said firmly as he left her dumbfounded.

*I’m done. I have done what do you want ____-ah but you can’t force someone else’s love. I love you not someone else.*

ahh...finally i can find a way to complete this story. I didn't have a feel to continue this story actually but i didn't want to throw this away, so i'm glad i finally find a way to end this. though it's not the best way. 

thank you for reading, viewing, subbing and comment-in and everything.

eat well, sleep well, keep healthy, lav ya! :*

but anyway, i'm going to end my very first fanfic "I Am A Man" and started to open a new page for a new story with the same person, leader Yoon Doojoon in "Fate", you can take a peek if you had a chance hehehe. bye~

eat well, sleep well, keep healthy, lav ya! again :*