a/n: I'm sorry if this is terrible. I've never actually been fully drunk, nor pregnant, so I can't talk from experience. If you see a mistake, please let me know.
Edit:So I've now been drunk and I basically rewrote this thing because I didnt like the way it flowed.

I sighed, looking across the room, the digital clock currently being the only source of light in the room. It gave everything a red glow as the time 3:30 shone from it. I knew by eleven that he wasn’t going to make it home for dinner, but I still didn’t think he would be gone this long. Practising took time. I know that, but this is ridiculous. I tried to go to sleep, but due to my insomnia ,falling asleep with him there was hard enough. Trying to fall asleep without him and being worried about him was impossible. I put a hand on my slowly growing stomach and smiled as I took comfort in the warmth I felt. Jongin and I already had one beautiful daughter and now another one is on the way.
To be honest, I was scared. Becoming a new mother was hard to accept at first, but I had Jongin most of the time with me during the first couple months with Haru. His company is cracking down on his hiatus though. Now that Haru is older, SM is planning on making him go on a mini-tour only a week after I deliver. Raising a little girl and now another baby by myself is looking pretty scary.
My thoughts are cut short by the rattling of keys outside the door. As Jongin tries to come in quietly, I notice he is looking slightly disheveled. Jongin turns and looks slightly startled at seeing me sitting in the living room with no lights on.
“What are you still doing up?” Jongin asks sounding annoyed.
“Couldn’t sleep.” I answer quietly.
“You know, you can’t keep doing this.” He says gruffly. I stay quiet not knowing what he is talking about. This only seems to agitate him more. “You can’t just stay up all night, hoping to try and guilt trip me into staying. I haven’t been away for longer than two weeks in over four years.”
I stand up confusion written on my face. “I’m not-”
“Don’t try to act innocence.” He sneers, cutting off my protests.”You have always been so clingy and emotional. The minute you don’t get your way you pout and cry till you get what you want.”
“I wasn’t pouting or crying. I couldn’t sleep because you weren’t here, so I sat here in the living room” I try to answer calmly, but I can feel the anger bubbling inside. Jongin’s weird behavior riling me up, despite the warning signs in my head. The  reminder that Haru was asleep in the other room is the only thing keeping me from losing my temper.
“You are such a child!” He taunts almost urging me to fight him. “Oh, Oppa, I’m so scared. Don’t leave me!” He says in a high pitch voice.
I felt my face go hot with anger. “Y-you know I have insomnia.” I say, my voice trembling
with anger and barely concealed hurt..
He let out a mocking laugh. Suddenly he rushed towards me, bent down, and got in my
face. Finally, I could make out the familiar stench of alcohol on him. “What are you going to do when I’m gone? Huh?” He says loudly.
I push him off of me. I could feel myself stumble from the force I used, but I couldn’t care
less. “You're drunk!” I yell letting all the anger out. “You know I hate it when you drink a lot. You get like this!”
"Yeah so what?! I needed a break from this place."
"A break?!"
"Yeah a break! All you do is the same thing over and over again! I am glad I am going on tour soon. It will give me time to myself!"
“Why the hell do you need time for yourself, when I already barely get to see you?” I insist. Even though I know that arguing with a drunk Jongin was not only futile, but exactly what he wanted, I continued to fight back. “You say you care about your family, but here you are showing up drunk.”
“You know,” Kai lowers the tone of his voice but not the volume. His eyes were clouded from the alcohol, but the cruelty showed through. “This is exactly why I didn’t want to marry you.”
My eyes widen as I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces.
“You may have been pretty, but you’re no idol. You're not on the level with any of those girls. Look at you now. I know plenty of former idols who pregnant and don’t complain half about as much you do. They don't whine when their husband is out working his off.”
He leans in closer to me as I stay rooted from the shock.
“I should have married JooSung.”
He knew that was the one insecurity I had in our relationship. I only told him that after I almost broke up with him, because I felt like I wasn’t as good as her. He promised to never bring it up unless it was to comfort me. He promised and yet here he was. I felt my heart harden and I have never felt more betrayed than in that moment.
I was about to yell back but suddenly quiet footsteps made me turn to see big sad eyes
looking at me, tears threatening to spill. I quickly rush to Haru and pick her up. Well, about as good as picking up can go when your stomach is the size of a Watermelon
"Sweetie, what’s wrong? I ask, ignoring my drunk husband in the room.
"Did you have a nightmare?" His gruff voice asked. I jump, a little surprised when his
voice was a lot closer than it was before. He was now rubbing Haru’s back and concern littered across his face. Haru just shook her head no. I turn to Jongin now remembering my anger.
"Since you want a break from me so bad. You can go stay in Haru’s room.” I said glaring at him. “I think she and I will be sleeping in our bed."  I’m pretty sure the cold stare I was sending him could make a sober man pee his pants, or at least make a very much drunk Jongin scared enough to not argue with me.
I walk into the master bedroom with Haru and close the door with a slam. I lay her down
on the bed and I lay down next to her. She curls up beside me and puts her small hand on my stomach.
"Do you want a baby brother or sister?" I ask curious to hear her answer and also trying to distract myself from what sounded like sobbing and a vase breaking in the living room. She stopped
and looked thoughtful for a moment.
"Either would be fine. As long as they aren't green.” She said with a serious look on her face causing me to grin. I shake my head wondering where exactly her thoughts always lead to.
“If only I had her imagination,” I thought to myself. “Then maybe I could imagine a world where I just it up and went to sleep without Jongin. Then maybe tonight would not have happened.”
I was almost asleep when a hand poked me, startling me.I turn to Haru and I see that she had a few tear stains on her cheek. “Umma, is Appa going to leave?”
I look at her, in shocked. “Why would you ask that?!”
"Because Joon’s parents fought before his Appa left." She answered in between sniffles.
I hugged her tightly, wishing that Haru didn't have to think like this. Not while she was still so young. I pulled her back to look her in the eye. “Appa and Umma love each other very much. Sometimes one of us will make the other mad by accident and we will yell, but we still love each other. Appa is not going to leave us no matter what, understand?” I said firmly, hoping the doubt that shrouded me on the last sentence didn’t come through.
It seemed to work though, Haru nodded and then laid down beside me, letting sleep come to both of us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wake up to a wave of morning sickness. I run to the bathroom and barely made it to the
toilet as I emptied out my stomach. I was like this for a few minutes before I felt a hand rub soothingly on my lower back. I turn a little to see Jongin looking at me sadly. I was too tired to push him away like I wanted, so I sat there letting him touch me. Despite the acid that was building in my throat that was not from the morning sickness. He leant forward and wiped my mouth with a washcloth he had in his hand. Afterwards he got up and brought me a glass of water. I drank a little letting the water cool my burning throat.
When I finished my water, I turned and finally looked at Jongin fully. Honestly, he looked awful. His hair was a mess and there were horrible bags under his eyes. I felt my heart soften at just how worn out he looked, like maybe he was the one that just had their heart ripped open by the love of their life. I raised my hand pushing his bangs away from his face. I gave him a the  smallest smile and he just simply stared back at me in return.
“How are feeling?” He asked softly. I just gave a shrug of my shoulders. His eyes fell downcast staring at the floor. “I’m sorry for last night.”
“Would you like to explain what happened?” I say, trying not let the resentment and anger from last night come back.
Jongin sighed. “Would you like to maybe talk in the kitchen? I made coffee and some omelet rice.” I quickly perk up. I have been craving omelet rice this whole pregnancy and I really wanted my morning cup of coffee. Jongin helps me stand up, keeping a gentle hand on my back the entire time. I check on the still sleeping Haru before I leave though. He leads me to the kitchen where three plates are set and the food is ready. I sit down while he makes both of us a cup of coffee. Jongin must be really tired considering how much he hates the stuff. Finally he sits down beside me and takes a deep breath.
“I’m not sure how it happened, but I was with the other members and we were talking.” Jongin starts explaining. He looks up at me and I don’t react. I just sip my coffee. “We were out thaving  fun and the others started talking about how much they enjoyed our last tour.Being able to  see a bunch of other new places and get away from Korea for a while. Then they started mentioning the fact I wasn’t able to be with them, because I was here with you guys. Which I totally didn’t mind, of course. Then they started making jokes about how I was no longer a man.”
Jongin looks to me hoping for some reaction but when he gets none he simply looks away. Finally after a couple of seconds he started talking again.
“They joked about how I was whipped now that I had a family. They said a bunch of stuff that hurt, even though I know they were just kidding. Then, they invited me out drinking and when I said no because I know you don’t like it. They started saying a bunch of stuff I rather not repeat. So, I gave in. I got drunk and I got angry.”
Jongin put his head in between his hands. “I’m so sorry for everything I said. There was no excuse for me to say any of that.  I under no circumstances regret marrying you or anything that we have done together. You are my soul mate. You are perfect and  I don’t want some idol, I want you.”
His words are starting to run together in between sobs.I feel a few tears run down my cheeks at the sight of the broken man in front of me.
“I know what I said hurt you and you probably hate me. I understand that and I would probably hate me too. I also know that you probably won’t forgive me but please… Please-” It looks like he is barely able to breathe through the cries.
He slides off the chair goes onto his knees, placing his head on the floor.
“Don’t leave me!” He begs before giving up on talking and lays there sobbing. I knew then that no matter what he said, there was no way I wouldn’t able to forgive him.
I lean forward and pick his head up. His nose and eyes are running and his eyes show the brokenness he feels.I don’t say anything, but he still understands. I place a soft kiss on his forehead and feel him relax under my touch. I take a napkin from the table and gently wipe his face. After I put the napkin down. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in for a hug. I hugged him back resting my chin on his head.
“I love you, so much.” Jongin declares.
“I love you too, You giant idiot.” I couldn’t help but smile and soon the smile spreads to Jongin as well.
With that, Jongin leaned forward to gently kiss my face. Leaving little pecks on my lips, cheeks and forehead.I heard a little giggle beside us and I turn to see Haru is standing there with a huge smile on her face.
Jongin ran and picked her up. Giving her a big kiss on her cheek. She smiled and hugged him back. I smiled as we all sat down and ate breakfast together, no longer worrying what the future may bring. Because no matter what, we will always be a family.