https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1z2SzFW_8A

Listen to it

 

 

 

 

I was so stupid 

I guess they say you don't know what you've had until you lose it. 

I'm one of those sad people who say that it's happened. 

I lost all my friends.... 

Especially two of my best friends... 

Sunggyu and Kevin....

How could I be so stupid to let them go...? They were the only people that loved me for who I really was. The only people who could put up with my stubbornness. With all the bad things I was. 

They was the only people who stayed by my side. And I let that go. 

So I will see them for the last time today, and leave my words with them. I guess they'll be happy once I'm gone... 

I mean... Who wouldn't be...? I was so horrible. 

One. Two. Three. Infinite tears slipped out of my eyes that morning. 

I'm so selfish. I'm so dumb. I have nothing now. I am nothing now. 

I walk into school with all the silence engulfing me, then bursting into a crowed of whispers and words. 

Hurtful, truthful words. I'm not going to waste my tears crying over these truthful words. 

The whispers where a mix of the horrible things I've done, and the ugly marks all over my body. I had to sneak out of the house to see Kevin and Sunggyu for the last time. 

I hate myself so much... 

I walk into class with all eyes on me. Roaming around my ugly, marked body. 

"So Kevin oppa" I hear from my side 

I let my eyes move to them as much as I can, without moving my head, then look straight to the board. Blackly. All the words she is about to say is the truth. The painful ugly truth. 

"I feel so bad for you oppa. Being deceived by that little . Oh how disgusted you must feel right now. And you actually loved that girl with all your heart at one point. It's okay though, I can clean you up from that selling herself on the streets. She's even gross to look at. See. All the marks on her body. I heard her foster parents beat her and I ca-" 

With those last words, I ran out of the class to take a breather. There were so much truth in her words... I am a that sells her body on the street to feed myself when my foster parents dump me out on the street after beating me. 

I'm dirty. 

Right there, I decide to write my letter to Kevin... 

 

'Dear Kevin, 

         Aren't I pathetic? I can't believe you could still stand to look at me at this point. Remember when you said never show up in my face again?

         Well, you won't have to worry about me showing up in your face anymore. I can assure you I won't. First, I just want to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry for lying to you about my. Even when you helped me with my parents, I never told you about me being the disgusting e I am. I just didn't know how to tell you. 

         I'm so sorry I made you help me with my parents. I'm sorry I made you even speak to me in such a loving tone. I'm so pathetic. And I just ruined your image by having you be friends with me. I'm so stupid... My eyes are even staining this stupid letter. Will you even read it? You'll probably just chuck it in the trash can. I don't blame you. 

         Anyways, I just want to say my last goodbye before I leave. You'll probably be happy right? Anyways.... I will always love you. Please don't be disgusted by that. I will s