I belted out the last note my smile never leaving my face. We struck our ending pose as the crowd of mostly middle aged men roared. The lights went out and we made our way backstage. My heart was pounding as people began rushing around backstage, some heading onto stage to clean up and others to assist my group and I. We were rushed into our dressing room and thrown into gowns for the star studded dinner that followed the performance.

“We’re finally in the big leagues.” our rapper whispered to me as we linked arms and walked into the large dinning hall.

I am part of the new girl group D4. We consist of-you guessed it-four girls. I am the maknae of the group and the lead singer. We recently debuted under YG which is probably the best record label ever. We have great people working with us and we love working for the label. We have a little more freedom than most idols get to have wight the exception of one rule. DO NOT get involved with anyone from SM. 

I smoothed down my dress and grabbed a sparkling cider and looked through the crowd. It really was a star studded event. Almost every group i could think of was present at the event. I was starting to feel a little nervous and small without my other members near me. I brought the flute to my lips and let the bubbly liquid sooth my throat.

“You were great up there.”

I turned and came face to face with a tall man. He had swooping brown hair, puffy lips, and almond eyes that turned into crescents as he smiled.

I blushed and twirled the liquid in my glass, “Thank you.”

He chuckled, “It’s hard to believe that you guys are rookies.”

I bowed slightly, “Ah, thank you…” I looked up at him.

“Lee Jinki.” he smiled again causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach.

I quickly mumbled my name. I could feel my face flaming as he complimented my name. I knew that name. I knew him, but I couldn’t figure out why there were red flags flying in my head.

“Would you like to take a walk with me?” he held out his hand to me.

I nodded setting my glass on a random table. He led me out into garden were we spent the next couple of hours talking. I could slowing feel myself falling for him. He was so funny and sweet and I could feel myself becoming addicted to talking to him. We leaned on the balcony as we talked the wind blowing softly around our bodies.

“I should have brought a jacket.” I chuckled as I rubbed my goose bump ridden arms.

He chuckled and took off his jacket draping it over my shoulders. 

“No,” I tried to give it back to him, “You’ll get cold.”
“Then I’ve got an idea.” he suddenly wrapped both of his arms around me.

“J-jinki?” I whispered my face now buried in his chest. He smelled good, really good, like a woodsy cologne.

“I know we’ve only known each other for a few hours, but I think I’m starting to fall for you.” He whispered.

Those words unlocked something within in me. I knew why those red flag were flying. I quickly pulled away surprising both myself and Jinki.

“You’re from SM!” I put as much space between us as I could.

He nodded his head slowly, “Yeah, and?”

“Jinki, you know that competition between my label and yours!” I cried, “We shouldn’t- we can’t be together.”

“We can work this out!” Jinki took a step forward but I warningly put a hand on his chest stopping his movements.

“Thank you for tonight, Jinki-ssi.” I stared at the ground as I quickly handed him his jacket, “Good night.” I bowed and scurried back inside leaving him staring after me.

The next day was filled with practice, practice, and more practice. I tried to throw myself into our dance but Jinki was still etched into my mind.

“Stop, stop.” Our leader cut the track. I panted resting my hands on my knees. I heard my name being called and I looked up to find the rest of my group staring back at me.

“What’s going on?” the second youngest shook her head and rested her hand on my shoulder, “You’re just not doing it right today.”

I swatted her hand away, “It’s nothing.”

Our leader groaned loudly squeezing the bridge of her nose, “Let’s just call it a day, alright?”

I swiftly grabbed my bag and bolted out of the practice room. Thinking a walk would help me to clear my mind I slipped on my hoodie and exited the building.

“Psst!”

I ly to find an empty sidewalk behind me. Thinking that i was just hearing things I turned back around. 

“Yah!” 

This time I heard my name being called.

“H-hello?” my voice trembled as I called out into the darkness.

“It’s me, stupid.” 

I jumped as someone grabbed my arm and spun me around. I came face to face with the last person I wanted to see.

“Jinki?” I asked.

He chuckled, “Took you awhile.”
“Yah!” I pouted, “I thought you were a murderer!” I punched him in the arm.

“Ok,ok.” he grabbed my arm, “How about I make it up to you?”
“We’re not supposed-“

“Please.” his chocolate eyes wide and filled with sincerity.

“Fine.” I crossed my arms.

He laced his fingers through mine and pulled me down the street. We entered the city which was still lit even though it was late at night. He brought us into a small grill.

“This is my favorite place to go late at night.” he poked the meat as it cooked in front of us, “It has the best chicken ever.” 

We spent the next hour talking, laughing, and eating. All of my worries seemed to fade away when I was with him. I knew it was wrong but it felt so good to be with him. He offered to walk with me to my dorm. I accepting knowing that everyone would be asleep by now. We walked silently staring up at the few stars that were poking through the clouds. He pulled me closer and threw his arm over my shoulders as we walked. I wrapped my arms around his torso letting the heat in his body soak through my skin and into my heart.

We finally stopped in front of my dorm and Jinki pulled me in his arms.

“Sleep tight, ok?” he pulled away slightly to look down at me. He cupped my face in his hands his thumb gently my cheeks. He leaned down and pressed his lips against my forehead.

I literally floated into our dorm and sank down against the door. I held my flaming face in my hands as I tried to slow my heartbeat. I was addicted.

For the next couple of months we managed to sneak around without anyone noticing. After late night practices we would walk around Seoul together or get a late night snack. We were constantly texting each other and talking on the phone until the early morning. It was so exhilarating with him and the fact that we could get caught at any moment fueled our relationship even more.

One night we were walking along the Han River after one of my dance practices. His arm was wrapped around my waist as we walked.

“We should tell our companies that we’re dating, yeah?” he suddenly said.

I nearly choked on the thought, “You’re kidding, right?”

He turned me so that i was facing him, “I think i’ve established myself enough in this business that we won’t be killed.” the way he stared at me made me feel like everything would be alright.

I sighed and a smile crept up on his face, “Fine, tomorrow.”

He pulled me into a big hug and in that moment a bright light flashed behind us. We quickly pulled away as we saw someone run down the street.

“Get him!” Jinki practically shouted.

We ran down the rest of the length of the river following the man, but he was too fast. He jumped into a white van at the end of the street and sped off.

“Oh no,” Jinki ran his hands through his hair, “It’ll be everywhere in the morning.”

The next morning, as predicted, I was called in for a long, long talk. The picture of Jinki and I had been everywhere and fans were freaking out. I was forbidden to have any contact with Jinki and I was forced to damage control on a TV appearance the next week. When I got back to the dorm the other girls tried to console me but i was too angry. I was done with the way the label treated us. We had no personal lives and we were forced to have them make decisions for us. I was through.

The company purposely filled my week with nothing but practices and music shows meaning I was transported everywhere I needed to go. I didn’t have one moment alone or even on the internet for that matter. 

It was finally the say that I would denounce the relationship. I was sitting in the dressing room nervously wringing my hands in my lap. I didn’t want to do it. I just wanted to run into Jinki’s arms and forget about the world.

I heard my name being called and I walked out the room only to find myself dragged into the utility closet next door.

“Yah!” I struggled against whoever it was, “What are you doing?”

“Shh, it’s me!” I heard Jinki’s voice.

“You !” I slapped his arm.

“Listen,” he laughed and tightened his grip on my arm, “We’re not denouncing everything, ok?”

“But our labels…”

“But nothing,” he stared into my eyes, “I care about you so much and I’m not going to let you go.”

“Jinki-“ and all of a sudden his lips were on mine. In a matter of seconds he pulled away.

“You talk to much,” he whispered, “We can do this, ok?”

I nodded, still dazed by the kiss.

____________________________________________________________________________

“And now we have D4’s maknae and the leader of Shinee with us!”

Jinki and I both stepped away from our groups and stood with the MC.

“So you guys got into a little bit of hot water last night because of a certain picture that spurred dating rumors.” she smiled at us, “Are they true?”

There was a long pause. I looked nervously out into the crowd, to my group behind me, and to my manager who stood backstage. My heart was beating so loud I was afraid everyone could hear it. Suddenly, Jinki grabbed my hand eliciting gasps from everyone in the room.

“Everyone this is my girlfriend,” he turned to me and looked into my eyes, ”Treat her well.”