I HATE YOU

Lee Jieun sort story. Or just telling her story.

Present for you all, I don’t know. This is not an ff or anything like that. Today, I feel like I miss him so much. And with Jieun I want to express it as if she is telling her story. I hope you guys like it ...

It's me Jieun-aa (lurvLIUsomuch). And for that boy ... I just want to say that I hate him so much in front of his face right now ... haha, mean right?. I don’t care.

 

 

Please be happy reader and give me some advice. I have a lot of lack in describe anything. But I'll try and work hard.

 

 

Happy reading ....

 

 

 

 I hate you .... I hate you.

Why are you. Why’d it has to be you the person that I love.

Why it has to be you the one who hate me so much, why did i have to love you.

I hate you, because you've never once seen me.

I hate you because I didn’t have the strength to be someone like you.

I hate you for being so far for my reach.

I hate you because I don’t know how many years it took for this feeling disappear.

I hate you because I love you so much . Park Chanyeol.

 

 

 

 

I’m Lee Jieun, an ordinary girl who has a very complicated life. Oh, gosh even I crave for having a normal life. Live like other people out there.

 

 

I'm the girl who had to work hard to support myself and help my family out of poverty. Really I didn’t ask for more, just like the other girls it’s enough. Even the debate in my heart made me even more disgusted with my life. Appa, eomma I've really tried to please you two. But why you haven’t seen it, why did you only look at the success of others and made me even mourning by this unfortunately life.

 

 

Minhyuk Oppa,,, bogoshipo ... are you happy in there?. Are you okay in there?. No one made you cry right?. Really, if I could I want to meet you wherever you are at the moment and drag you back to our families. You know eomma miss you so much. Also worried.

Last night I had a dream, you back to home. I quickly ran and hugged your scrawny body from behind. At that time I think just keep holding you in our house, I won’t release it until whenever. But, when I asked, are you there doing fine. And with your typical smile. Smile that I miss so much. You said you're fine in there. Even you have a good friend in there. And in there you could accompany Eunhyuk oppa also halmoni. I just listen and a breath of relief from me made me let go of my arms from you.

Oppa, I'm fine and willing to let go of you , although you can’t go back again as long as you're happy in there. Jeongmal bogoshipoyeo ...

 

 

 

 

And the people that I hate the most in this world is Park Chanyeol. A man who I loved for about six years. I knew not him who I hate but it’s myself. I hate myself who aren’t pretty enough to approach him. I hate myself because I didn’t have anything to be proud of that could make him to see me. And I hate myself who still can’t forget him, the person who hate me.

 

 

Today is our third reunion, previously I never attend. I was too embarrassed by my situation that still remained unchanged. Jieun who is still a mediocre. But in this reunion. I will come. not because I've become a success woman or anything like that. It  just I wanted to see Park Chanyeol, namja who had reject my confession two years ago. Yes, I was stupid. I knew, if I'm going to get a rejection from him but stupidly I thought maybe after the rejection I can move on from that tall namja. but what now?. I still like the old days. The felling was still there. Love that blinds me. Love that sometimes made me very ungrateful to live.

 

 

 

 

Two hours later, Jiyeon will pick me up and we'll meet up with our old friends there. I miss them, but in fact they are not my main purpose. I just want to see Park Chanyeol.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-Ooo-

I sat in the chair that line up, the reunion event held in a restaurant that I thought it was too fancy for my class. But, let it be. It's okay  the money that I saved to be used for this reunion. For me to meet with Chanyeol.

 

 

 

 

 

Degg ....

 

He came, and my heart is still the same reaction like three years ago, the last time I saw him. My heart is beating very fast even slightly makes my chest ache. he came with his old friends. The group of  rich and popular children. He smiled as he greeted all of our old friends. I want to go from here. I want to run and hide. But that is not possible, it is impossible for a girl like me who are old enough still behave like a child. He is getting closer towards our table. I tried to be as normal as possible. I put my normal face and smiled at them as best I could.

 

 

But why. Why Chanyeol still remains unchanged. His attitude is still the same. Always ignore my existence. This scene. I had experienced this before. When I sat with my high school friends Eunji. In front of my class. He walked in the hallway of the classroom, and his smile when he saw Eunji expands. In fact, he was greeted Eunji and small talk with her. Hey, he even knew me. I, him and Eunji was in same class when in tenth grade while in high school. And the scene was repeated again today. He passed without even greeting me or just smile.

 

 

He made my hatred toward him grow even more....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-Ooo-

I think that reunion was .... because of what?. Because Chanyeol was ignoring me and his gaze is still cold as it used to. Cold stare that only he gave to me. And the most frustrating is, it turns out he's engaged to our junior while in high school. And in another month he will marry the girl. That girl was Bae Suzy, the girl who is a model and has her own boutique. Cool isn’t it?.

Me?. I'm not at all comparable to her.

 

 

 

 

I clutched this blue envelope. This envelope may even slightly damp with sweat. My hands was always wet and it always makes me feel awkward when shaking hands with other people. And it also made Chanyeol looked at me as a weird girl . Because I was reluctant to shake hands with him when we go up for eleventh grade and should be separate class after that. I am very sorry indeed that time. why I didn’t receive his hand shake. You're stupid Jieun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I stood with irregular beating heart. Today, I want to express my feelings to him for the last time. Before he got married and before I go away from korea. My hands seemed to tremble, it will happen to me when I was feeling very nervous and scared. Both my legs were trembling and very limp. Come quickly and everything will end.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tap

Tap

Tap ...

 

My heart, my heart was beating very fast. He came.

 

I turned to him and smiled at him.

 

 

His face was priceless, I never smiled at him because it would look strange for me to smile at him before. I even couldn’t saw his eyes before.

 

 

He certainly didn’t think that people who are waiting him was me. Jieun, a weird girl.

 

 

 

"Park Chanyeol ..." he just looked at me confused.

 

"PARK CHANYEOL..... I ING HATE YOU ...." I screamed with all of my energy. He looked at me with fear. Do I look like a monster girl now?.

 

"WHY’D YOU CAN’T NOTICE ME. WHY ARE YOU SO BAD TO ME .... YOU ALWAYS IGNORING ME THE PERSON WHO LOVED YOU SO MUCH... "

 

"What do you mean." What do I mean? .... Why is he so slow.

 

I walked over towards him.

 

 

 

 

Bukk ....

 

I landed a hard punches on his stomach. I punched his stomach with all the strength I had. I kick that calf of this tall namja. Finally he collapsed to his knees and right in front of me. I looked at him with mixed feelings between the angry, vengeful also hate. Now I slapped his face so hard.

 

"SERVE THAT FOR BEING MEAN NAMJA. THAT’S FOR ALWAYS MADE MY LIFE GO WORSE. THAT’S FOR YOU WHO SO ARROGANT. FOR ALL THIS TORTUROUS  FEELLING. I HATE YOU .... "

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Jieun?."

 

What was that?. Did it just my hallucination. Oh how that scene was always spinning in my brain. How I wish I can do that to him. But that is not possible.

 

 

"Chanyeol-ssi. Sorry I've made your time go waste. "There was no response. Ugh.

 

 

 

" I… I just wanted to give you this. "I the blue envelope that contains all my feelings to him.

 

 

"Please read… Thank you for your time.  Annyeong. "I bowed my back. Then turn around from this place. The forgotten park.

 

 

After this I hope everything will be finished. After this I hope I will be more appreciative my life. After this I hope eomma and Appa will see me. After this I wish I could give all my heart to Baekhyun. My Namja chingu.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-Oooo-

 

Chanyeol open the blue envelope. He was very surprised why Jieun the girl that  he considers as disturbing, turned out to be the one who waiting for him.

 

 

 

 

Park Chanyeol.

I know you must be very surprised, because it turns out I'm the one who wants to see you.

This letter is not a confession of love as it used to. Because you already knew my feelings for you.

I just wanted to give you a farewell. I hear you're getting married in a month.

Chukaeyo ... hopefully you guys lasting and have a happy life.

 

I ...

I just want you to know that I am.

 

I hate you.

I really hate you that I can’t take it any longer.

Actually, I wanted to strangle and bump your head until you realize that you are very arrogant.

 

Why can’t I?

 

Why can’t I be one of the girl you're dating?

Is it because I'm not pretty?

Do I didn’t have that criteria of being your girl or because my level couldn’t compare with you?

 

Or because I didn’t have anything?

 

After this I will move and won’t come back to Korea again. I know you didn’t give the about that.

But with this letter, I want to finish it all.

I want you to know. That I am not like other girls. Who love you because you are the famous and rich  namja Park Chanyeol. In fact I really hope you're not the famous and rich Chanyeol. With that I could be comparable to you.

 

I love you sincerely. In fact I am willing to devote my life for you if you let me on one time. But you’ve never gave me a chance.

 

I hope you regret after knowing this.

I hope you're looking for me after this.

But it will not happen.

 

I hate you Park Chanyeol. I Hate you so much.

 

 

 

Haha, don’t feel guilty or anything. I've let you go from my life. I release these feelings. I took off my hatred of you. I took off my love for you after this letter was in your hand.

 

Lastly, live happily. And goodbye.

 

 

 

Lee Jieun

The girl who used to love you.

 

 

 

 

 

"Mwoya? .... What does all this mean? ... that weird girl." Chanyeol let out a thin smile. He didn’t know if her feeling was real.  He didn’t know that her loves was deep. he didn’t know.

 

 

"Mianhe."

 

 

 

 

FIN

 

 

 

^^^ ummm,,,, how is it?. right?

But pls give me your thought, I know I still have a lot of grammar mistake and spelling error. But please bear with it. I’ll try and work hard…. And for my chingu who request for baeku fic. I already make it, but I can’t update it…. It’s because I didn’t feel satisfy with that story so please forgive me… I’ll make other baeku story I promise…

Lastly, have a good day and annnyyyeeeoooonnngg…. ^_^