WARNING: THE FOLLOWING CHAPTER CONTAINS IMPLICATIONS OF BULLYING AND (SODOMY). THOSE WHO ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH SUCH TOPICS, PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE.

A/N: I will not be rating this story as H because while bullying and is mature content, it is not adult content. Even if you are a 12-year-old, you should know and understand these two topics. These are serious issues and I am only putting this warning for people who might find the following content as a trigger for traumatising experiences.

By the time last period Calculus comes around, Dongwoon is exhausted from having carried his Indian Civilization around the whole day along with his usual backpack and training equipment. Jaejin flatly refused to help him during Orchestra, Kikwang was too preoccupied about the new student (his name was Yong Junhyung) in Anatomy, during lunch the rest of the '91-line had abandoned him even though the project was Jinwoon's too and none of his friends took Chinese with him.

Flopping down onto his usual seat in his Calculus class, Dongwoon buries his head into his bag and doesn't even care when Kibum starts kicking his chair and nagging at him to "get off or else you'll get pimples and do you think Kikwang-hyung will want you then?". Right now, Dongwoon is so tired that he is willing to just get those pimples and be dumped by Kikwang first, because he can woo the petite brunet back when the pimples heal. Even when the bell for class rings and Hyojin-saem comes in, Dongwoon remains flat on his table. His previous plans to pelt his basketball at those from the '91-line in his Calculus class are dashed too.

Dongwoon manages to pull out his notebook and pencil case before Hyojin-saem starts on inverse functions, but the class is interrupted by a few short knocks on the door. When the door swings open, Dongwoon recognizes the person standing at the door. Kibum restarts his kicking from behind the tired blonde at a fresh, frantic pace. Dongwoon thinks Kibum might be trying to converse in Morse code. Jinwoon nudges him in the ribs a little too hard and Dongwoon forgets why he hangs out with these people at all.

"I'm sorry that I'm late, I got lost in the hallways," the new senior, Junhyung, apologizes with a formal bow to Hyojin-saem. That sentence alone has Dongwoon shooting up from his seat, scrambling to grab his phone from the front pocket of his backpack.

From: Arab Maknae

HYUNG11!11ONE1!!! IS HYUNSEUNG HYUNG WITH YOU? I THINK HE ABANDONED THE NEW SENIOR11!!1ONE1

From: General Yoon

No wonder he came for Psych so quickly -_-;;

Dongwoon is glad that only Kibum and Jinwoon take Calculus with him, because that makes the seat next to him free because for some reason, everyone in the academy seems to unconsciously isolate '91-line from the rest of the class/school. Dongwoon has a sneaking suspicion it's because '91-line is just retarded and again, Dongwoon cannot remember why he hangs out with them aside from the fact that he was born in 1991. Hyojin-saem lets the new transfer off because it's his first day and when she asks him to take a seat, Dongwoon waves him over as politely as he can because how is waving anyone over ever polite?

Junhyung bows once more to the Calculus teacher before he turns to look for an empty seat in the class. He sees a blonde waving at him in an awkward manner and for a second, he can't remember why this blonde looks so familiar before it hits him a little like someone slapping him over the head with a hot towel. Junhyung shuffles over to the empty table next to the blonde and takes the seat, the blonde smiling brilliantly at him.

"Hi, you must be Junhyung-sshi, I'm Son Dongwoon," the blonde introduces and everything snaps into place in Junhyung's mind. Son Dongwoon was the blonde carrying the huge reconstruction of the Indian Civilisation in the morning at the main office and the boyfriend Doojoon and Yoseob were teasing Kikwang about.

Hyunseung's "look for the Indian Civilisation" makes a lot of sense now as well, because while Hyunseung is unique in expressing his thoughts, his logic is never nonsensical. Junhyung gives his grimace-smile and Dongwoon looks a bit surprised for a moment, but he recovers quickly and his brilliant smile is back.

Junhyung mentally nicknames Kikwang and Dongwoon the smile couple, because both of their smiles rival each other and Junhyung really hopes they won't smile at him at the same time because then Junhyung might go blind from the sheer brightness of their smiles. Junhyung can't really understand how they manage to smile so cheerily because Junhyung has never had any reason to smile like that before.

"Sorry about Hyunseung-hyung, he isn't very friendly," Dongwoon says in low tones to Junhyung when Hyojin-saem actually begins the lesson about inverse functions. Junhyung shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He has known since Spanish class, when he first met Doojoon, that Hyunseung hadn't mentioned him at all to his group of high school friends. None of them, not Doojoon, Yoseob, Kikwang or Dongwoon, seem to know that Hyunseung and Junhyung went to middle school together. That makes things a little awkward for Junhyung because no matter how different Hyunseung is now, Junhyung still knows Hyunseung a little. He doesn't know how to pretend like he doesn't know Hyunseung. It's hard to pretend to not know someone who has made up a huge majority of your life (or what feels like a huge majority because Junhyung can't remember any part of his life that doesn't have Hyunseung in it).

"It's okay, it must be a bother to have to guide a stranger around," the word stranger gets caught in Junhyung's throat and he has to choke it out, which elicits another odd look from Dongwoon. The blonde doesn't ask any questions and for that, Junhyung is thankful. Being ignored and being left out is much easier for him than to be put in the spotlight. Junhyung slips his hand into his pocket, feeling for the little medicine case he always keeps in his pocket. He can feel the thuds of his heart against his chest and he breathes deeply, trying to ease the anxiety rising in his chest.

At least, even with the changes in Hyunseung, he is still someone familiar. Now he knows why Heechul-hyung put him in so many of Hyunseung's classes. Junhyung's mother must have spoken to him and appealed to him. Junhyung rubs the wrinkles of skin on his wrist, a nervous habit he has been trying to kick. He is half-listening to Hyojin-saem but he can't concentrate much. He is trying to soothe himself, but his deep breathing isn't working.

He knows he's not really understanding or processing what she's saying because of the anxiety that blossoming rapidly from his chest and because of that, now he worries. He worries that he won't be able to catch up on this little bit of material that she's teaching and if he can't catch up, he might be screwed over for the entire subject and if he fails – Junhyung jams up at the thought of failing and he s his hand into his pocket, reaching desperately for the little pill in his little medicine case.

He fumbles with the catch of the pillbox, but he manages to pry it open. He pops one of the small white pills into his mouth immediately and dry swallows the pill. He can see that Dongwoon is glancing at him worriedly but Junhyung can't stop rubbing the wrinkles on his wrist and he knows he must look a wreck.

When Hyojin-saem pauses in her lesson to give sample questions on the whiteboard, Dongwoon leans over to Junhyung with concern written clearly all over his face.

"Junhyung-sshi, are you okay?" Junhyung wipes the sweat from his nape away with his hand and nods, but doesn't trust himself to speak. He is still a little on edge and he might let something unnecessary slip, so Junhyung forces himself to remain silent. Dongwoon doesn't seem convinced but he doesn't push the subject again. Junhyung watches the blonde scribble down the questions onto his own notebook and then turn to his neighbour on his right to discuss about something.

Junhyung focuses on the feeling of his veins under his fingers, allowing the sensation to relax him. It eases him more than deep breathing when he visualizes the blood rushing in his blood vessels.

"Hyunseung-ah, are you scared of anything?" Junhyung asked. He was always the one asking questions between them, even though everyone said Hyunseung was always asking strange questions. When he thought about that, Junhyung realised that they didn't know Hyunseung very well. Hyunseung's thoughts were well-kept secrets and Hyunseung rarely ever asked Junhyung questions. Even when Junhyung asked questions, sometimes he didn't get answers either. He never got offended when Hyunseung ignored him. Hyunseung merely meant that he didn't feel like sharing. Junhyung understood that. There were things he wanted to keep to himself too.

"I think as long as I know I'm alive and I can feel my blood running through my veins, I feel safe. You can get hurt on the outside and the inside, but if you can feel blood circulating, you're still alive and you're still going. And if you're still going, you can go through anything in life," Hyunseung said simply. Junhyung stared down at the bench that they were sitting on in the park near Junhyung's house. They had chosen a seat near the fountains and Hyunseung was watching the waters intently. Junhyung couldn't be sure what Hyunseung was watching for, but he knew that there was something in the water that had caught Hyunseung's attention.

Junhyung thought about what Hyunseung had said. If you're still going, you can go through anything in life,Junhyung knew that Hyunseung didn't mean that you could get shot by a bullet and live. He knew that Hyunseung didn't mean trying to kill yourself and expecting to survive. What Hyunseung meant, Junhyung could understand, but somehow he couldn't quite think of the words that would convey Hyunseung's message as well as what Hyunseung had said.

It was a little bit like speaking a different language, with Hyunseung. He had to understand Hyunseung to understand what Hyunseung said. Hyunseung didn't really explain things in the way that normal people could understand. However, it wasn't like Hyunseung was purposefully being obscure. Hyunseung just thought differently from others and that made it hard for others to understand him. Junhyung liked trying to understand Hyunseung. The other boy was like a special secret that only Junhyung could understand. The other boy made Junhyung feel special.

Junhyung alternates between gripping his wrist tightly and letting it loose. Doing this allows Junhyung to really feel the warm blood rushing through his vessels and he goes through a few rounds of clenching and unclenching his hand around his other wrist before the anxiety leaves him, for the most part. The motion calms Junhyung's nerves and he finds himself able to concentrate on the lesson at hand again. Junhyung jots down what Hyojin-saem explains about inverse functions and can smile a little easier when Dongwoon looks at him with concern again.

---

The last bell of the day rings and Junhyung feels a sense of relief, glad that he has finally passed through his first day of classes at the academy. As he packs his stationary and his Calculus notebook into his backpack, Dongwoon is already all packed up and standing by his table.

"Junhyung-sshi, are you really okay? You looked really pale there for a while," Dongwoon prods, worry evident in the tone of his voice. Junhyung twirls the ring on his index finger, feeling the cool metal against his skin. His nerves are functioning perfectly fine.

"I think it's just what I had for lunch," Junhyung says, he doesn't mention that he knows it's more like what he didn't have for lunch. He holds up the can of Coke that Hyunseung had given to him.

"This'll probably make me feel a little better," Junhyung tries to reassure Dongwoon when blonde stays by his table with that uneasy expression. He gives his grimace-smile and the knit of Dongwoon's eyebrows becomes less prominent. Junhyung thinks that is a good sign because Dongwoon looks less like Junhyung just tried to kill himself and more like Junhyung looked ill in the middle of the class. Junhyung keeps the ring around his index finger twirling. Junhyung zips his backpack up and slings it onto his back.

"Doojoon-hyung asked me to bring you to meet them at the lockers, do you mind?" Junhyung shakes his head "no, I don't mind" and follows after Dongwoon, who is an inch or two taller than him, out of the classroom. Two other students wave to Dongwoon as they leave the class but the blonde shoots daggers at them with his eyes. Junhyung expects them to be offended, but instead, they laugh and flip Dongwoon off jokingly. It puzzles Junhyung, but he doesn't think it would be appropriate to ask because Dongwoon looks annoyed with them.

They make their way to the lockers without much spoken on Junhyung's part, Dongwoon chatters to Junhyung about how Hyunseung is actually a really nice guy and deviates to other guys from their little group. Junhyung only pays mild attention, because he is looking around the school. No one picks on him in this school. No one pushes him or tries to bump into him on purpose. No one grabs him by the wrist and jerks him toward them. No one tries to wrap their arms around his shoulders or his waist. Junhyung can't really understand the difference because the students here look the same as they did in his old school, in Seoul University High School, but everything is just so different.

Junhyung juxtaposes the students from his old school and the ones from the academy next to each other. He is trying so hard to pick out the differences that he doesn't realise that there is something speeding toward him.

By the time Junhyung realises what is going on, his body has been slammed into the cold red metal lockers and there is pain spreading down his back. He can't stop the soft whimper of pain that escapes him when he slumps to the ground, body weak. He doesn't hear the apologies being called out and the voices shouting. Instead, Junhyung is transported back to Seoul University High School.

"What a , why the hell are the teachers treating you like some porcelain Barbie? Are you a porcelain Barbie? How much does it take before we break you?" Junhyung bit down on his lip to prevent the groan from slipping past as he collided with the toilet seat, a hand entwined painfully in his hair.

"You should break because you don't deserve ," Junhyung couldn't hold back the scream that ripped from his lips when fingers reached into his pants and impaled themselves roughly in a place that Junhyung never thought could be touched. The pain that shot through up his spine made him feel like he wasbeing ripped apart and he didn't know why, couldn't understand. He tried to claw away from the hands; he just wanted to stop the pain but then other fingers tightened around his wrists. He couldn't feel his hands and more than the violent pain that had him in spasms, the lack of feeling in his hands terrified him.

He couldn't feel the blood rushing in his vessels and he didn't think he would get through this point of his life.

Junhyung thinks he must be hallucinating when he sees Hyunseung before his eyes, blurry, but there. The pain in his back feels like hell and he can feel phantom fingers in a place that shouldn't be familiar. He doesn't even realize he is whimpering Hyunseung's name until he feels gentle hands cupping his cheeks, his vision slowly clearing.

Junhyung wants to cry, he just wants to curl up into a hole because he sees a look in Hyunseung's eyes. He sees a look that he recognizes.

It's the same look from that day at the park, when Hyunseung was staring into the waters of the fountain.