I was no ordinary stuffed bear - one of a kind with fine brown fur and long limbs. I was one of a set of five, in which the other bears were also unique. One had a different set of eyes that looked like they were smiling on their own. Another was smaller than the rest of us, but he was the most stuffed. The other one had fine jet black fur, almost resembled a black cat. The last one looked frail, but was the cutest one of all.

            I don’t know what she saw in me, but I guess it was fate that I ended up with her. I was her first love. When she saw me, I saw that her eyes glowed. She went up to me and said “Yes, you are the one.”

           She hugged me immediately when she took me from the shelf. The other bears said goodbye to me as I was lovingly carried by the girl in her arms. She showed me to her parents and they nodded in agreement that I would be the lucky bear to have a home. “I will call you Minho,” she whispered.

            The first three years were wonderful. Every morning, she would wake up and say “Good morning, Minho.” Sometimes she would go to school and I would wait. She would tell me about her day and what she did that day. When she stayed at home, she would read a book out loud so I can hear or play music so I can listen too. I have watched her learned how to dance, get frustrated with Math and cry from watching sad movies. Every night, she would pat my head and say “Good night, Minho. I love you.”

            One day, she just stayed in bed because she was sick. She kept sneezing and rubbing her nose. “It’s because your teddy bear is so dusty and dirty!” her mother said. I saw her frown and sneezed again. When she was sleeping, her mother took me from her bed. She washed me along with clothes, and I was hung by the ears on a clothesline. I was returned days later when I was completely dry, but I wasn’t placed beside the girl. I was positioned on a shelf, along with her other stuffed animals.

            “Two things can happen to you. One is that she’ll look for you, or she’ll forget about you just like what happened to us,” a doll beside me said.

            “She won’t forget about me. She loves me,” I said.

            “Yeah, that’s what we all said,” said another toy.

            Thankfully, the girl looked for me when she got home from school. I was taken down from the shelf and was held in her arms again. “Oh Minho, I love you very much.”

            About a year later, I got another companion in the bed. It was a stuffed wolf named Jongin. “Minho, this is Jongin. Jongin, this is Minho. You can keep each other company when I’m gone.”

            Things started to change when Jongin came. It was Jongin who was greeted every morning and evening. I didn’t mind being at the end of the bed, at least I wasn’t on the shelf like the other toys. I was already happy to be near the girl like this. I was not totally forgotten. Sometimes she would still pat my head or dust me because I got dusty for not being touched often.

            I was happy even this way. I know that she loves me even if she doesn’t talk to me that often anymore. I know that she’ll remember the way it used to be and would go back to that moment when she first saw me.

            When she was not at home, her mother took all of us stuffed toys. We were washed and dried on the clothesline again. We were all re the shelf, even Jongin. I expected that me and Jongin will be brought down from the shelf like before but when she got home, she didn’t even notice.

            It stayed like this for a couple of years. We watched her change, like using her gadgets more often and go to sleep really late. I was still happy this way. At least I could still watch her grow up, even if I’m not the one hearing about her day anymore. I could still hear her stories but she talks on her cellphone instead. This is better than not knowing her at all.

            She was cleaning up her room one day. She said she would get new furniture and even paint the walls. She was clearing up the shelf we were in and took down the toys one by one. I waited for my turn and wonder what she’ll do with me.

            “Oh Minho, I’ve missed you so much!” she said with a smile. “I’m sorry I’ve been busy.”

            It’s okay. I’ve seen you everyday. I don’t mind. As long as you’re happy.

            “I remember when I first got you.” She hugged me tight. Her arms have gotten longer. “I still love you, Minho. Never forget that.”

            She started sneezing again. “But I know there’s a better place for you. For all of you.”

            I don’t know what is going to happen but I felt a sharp pang inside of me. I have never felt this before.

            “I’m sorry that I had to do this but I want you all to have a better life. And not just stuck here on this shelf,” she said and started to put the toys one by one in a box. I saw Jongin being one last time before being placed inside.

            No, it’s better to be stuck on that shelf and still see you.

            She held me for the last time and said “I love you the most, Minho.”

            At that moment, I wished that stuffed bears could cry.

            That was the last time I saw her. That day was sad but I came to realize that it has been for the better. I have been loved by different girls but her love was different. I am glad that I have been loved by her. And with that, I am happy this way.