A/N:

I think I have to warn people that this fic is not fluffy lol Also go read Color her Blue because color wheel. :3

It had rained the night before. Mud and soggy leaves clung to the bottom of his boots as Seungri made his way up the hill. The soft ground yielded under his weight. The scent of wet wood irritated his nose. He pushed a few branches out of his way to avoid getting scratched. There was a beaten path he could've taken a few yards back. It was relatively free of long branches and much easier to travel on, but he was used to the rough terrain. Besides, what's the point of hiking without getting a few scratches here and there?

You look like you got into a fight with a cat with all those scratch marks.

Gritting his teeth, Seungri pushed ahead, determined to get to his destination. When he reached the top of the hill, he took in the landscape with a critical eye. I suppose it's nice, he thought. Eyeing the position of the sun, he estimated that it was getting close to three.

"Gotta pick it up," he mumbled to himself. "It gets dark fast this time of year." Adjusting the bag on his shoulders, he walked down the hill, careful to avoid the cluster sharp-looking shrubs scattered there. Once at the bottom, Seungri shook some of the gunk off his boots by knocking them against a tree trunk.

The hike was a lot quieter this time around.

"We there yet?" he grumbled, swatting away the bugs that were hovering over his head.

"No we're not there yet!" Chaerin snarled. "You've been complaining for twenty minutes now. Give it a rest, will you?"

"Why the hell can't we just go to the beach?" he demanded, snapping off the offending branch that had just given him a fresh cut along his arm.

"Because that's not where you hike, idiot," she answered, pushing a branch out of her way.

"Psh! Whate—ow!" She released the branch just in time to whack him in the face. "What was that for?" he demanded, glaring at her back while rubbing his face.

Chaerin tossed an annoyed look over her shoulder. "Tough luck. Who told you to tag along?"

"Who told YOU to go trekking through the forest on some road? I swear to god, you pick the worst routes," Seungri complained.

"You just didn't want to stay home," she accused, wiping the sweat off her brow. "Jiyong and Youngbae would've pranked you and make you clean the mess afterwards."

"Getting away from those two is an added bonus," Seungri conceded.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Hurry up, I hear running water. I have to refill the canteens and the campsite should be close by."

Seungri kneeled by the stream and splashed his face with water. The sun was well on its trek down, judging from his elongated shadow. Everything was acquiring an orange-red tint. Looking at his hands, he could almost imagine that there was a fire raging underneath his skin. The colors reminded him of the orange scales of a salmon fish, and he remembered that he needed to catch something for dinner.

"You're cleaning those. I don't want to smell like fish guts for the rest of the night," she said, wrinkling her nose at his catch.

He smirked. "Why Chaerin, that's the girliest thing you've ever said."

"Don't make me hurt you, Seungri."

He tossed his hefty catch on the shore and slammed his fist into a tree, splintering it in half. "Why am I still thinking about her?" Slumping down against the damaged tree, he cradled his head in his hands. The sound of his labored breathing filled his ears as he squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to block out any memory his surroundings would call to mind. It was stupid for him to go hiking when he used to do it with her all the time. In the past, it usually cleared his head, but now it seemed to do just the opposite. He couldn't even remember why he was there to begin with.

"You can't kill me."

She had been so sure, so goddamn smug. He wanted to do just that, if only to show her that he could and would kill her. Eventually. And it would be so easy too, his fingers curling around her impossibly slender neck (it was the only girly thing about her) and squeezing until all of the air flew out of her lungs.

It was a method he entertained for a while. He needed to come up with an idea of how to kill her. It couldn't be standard like all of his other assignments. That would be tasteless. It was inevitable that everything would boil down to them being locked in a battle to the death. She was a do-gooder and he was essentially created to destroy her. That made him evil by default, right? He shouldn't care about killing her.

"If you kill me, I'll hand you your on a platter with all the ts," she stated while rotating a skewered fish over the fire.

"You can't do that if you're dead, genius," he pointed out lazily from his spot on the fallen log.

"Which is why you're not killing me. How many times do I have to spell it out for you? I'm the only one who can semi-tolerate your crap."

"Fine, think what you want," he shrugged. "Just don't be surprised when I smash your head into the ground."

"And you shouldn't be surprised when I kick your face in for it," she retorted, handing him the cooked fish. "Careful, it's hot."

Picking up his catch, Seungri continued his way to the campsite. He wondered what had changed in his relationship with Chaerin that made him so sentimental. The idea of her dying didn't bother him too much; only the thought of having more free time made him somewhat uncomfortable. He usually relied on her to make his day entertaining, whether it was a sparring match or just a trip to the reacquaint themselves with Mother Nature with a couple of paintball guns in hand.

But those were only on the days they were nice to each other.

On normal days, he was ready to kill her the old fashioned way, by ripping her head clean off her shoulders. She would've deserved it too. She did everything from beating him over the head with a metal baseball bat (she smacked him so hard she almost bent the damn thing) to electrocuting him with a stun gun. A scar on his right side reminded him of a particularly painful incident and in return, he once nearly drowned her when he shoved her head into a toilet, and again when he threw her bound body into a lake. And who could forget the time he threw a big toy truck on her for being a smart-?

None of it mattered in the end though.

"Since we're on the topic of your death," he said casually, picking his teeth with a fish bone, "how'd you suppose you'll go out?"

"With a bang, naturally," she replied easily, shooting him a look that said he was asking a stupid question. "I'm going down fighting the good fight, beating up the monsters and bad guys. Anything less ain't gonna happen."

"A ‘gizibe’ through and through, huh?" he said condescendingly.

"And what about you, Mr. I'm-so-badass," she asked, shoving him on his shoulder, "how'd you think you're gonna croak?"

"Me? Croak?" He tossed his head back and laughed. "I'm gonna live forever!"

She laughed, throwing a twig at him. "Keep dreaming!"

When he got the orders, Chaerin was as good as dead.

Seungri reached the campsite and dropped all of his belongings. Taking the string of fish, he plopped down on a fallen log, flipped open his pocket knife, and proceeded to clean his catch. I should get a new hobby, he thought as he sliced a fish open. This one stinks.

It also made him think about a dead girl he killed.

It didn't matter that she was Chaerin, the person (he never could get around to calling her a girl) he'd spent nearly a decade fighting with and clowning around with. It didn't matter that it had happened just when he was starting to get along with her. It didn't matter who she was or what she was going to become because he was going to (had already, in fact) kill her. She was just another name on the list that needed to be crossed off.

And Seungri didn't regret doing it at all. He just had to wait out whatever slight inconvenience her death posed for him.

Patience wasn't a word in his vocabulary, but it was something to him. Something he'd like to think that he'd use one day. He bottled and shelved it next to Justice, Sincerity, and all of the other morals he never practiced. Because secretly, though he'd never willingly admit it, Chaerin had rubbed off on him. It was just a little bit, but it was enough to make him stay up at night occasionally and think about how he'd fit into the whole "I’m a good person" lifestyle. But Seungri also ended up stuffing thoughts of that sort into a little jar marked "Dreams" ("Fat Chance" was more appropriate) and placed it next to Regret on the top shelf.

A sharp blow sent her crashing through the trees and into a clearing. She landed hard on her back with a few thick branches poking her in the spine. Knowing he was nearby, she struggled to her feet and ran toward the trees to get some cover. "Damn it!" she cursed when her legs gave out shortly after standing, leaving her still yards away from relative safety. "What the hell is wrong with me?"

Left with no choice, Chaerin started crawling towards the bushes. She needed time to regroup and catch her breath. It was strange. She'd taken worse beatings before, but none had left her body feeling so worn out and sluggish.

A shadow fell over her and her eyes widened. "."

"Need a lift?" a sneering voice asked above her. "Let me help you out."

A swift kick to the ribs sent her crashing through the bushes and slamming against the base of an old tree. Gasping for air, she clutched her side as she weakly propped herself up. Seungri stood in before her, not a scratch on him, with that smug look on his face. In her head, Chaerin was cursing him to hell and back as she watched him approach her.

Seungri reached down and grabbed a fistful of her hair, lifting her up a few feet off the ground until she was eye level with him. "C'mon, say it," he goaded with an infuriating grin. "Say 'Mercy' and I might go easy on you."

Glaring defiantly, she spat a mixture of saliva and blood on his face. "Go to hell!"

Wrinkling his nose, he released her and watched her crumple to the ground. Wiping his cheek with the back of his hand, he tsked at her with disappointment. "What's going on? You said you're going out with a bang, remember? You haven't landed a hit on me yet."

"Just wait and see," Chaerin spat. With one hand gripping the tree trunk, she shakily got to her feet. "I'll waste you."

He gave her a dubious look. "Now, now, Chaerin. Every time a person lies, an angel loses her wings."

"You're so full of , Seungri." she snapped. Curling her hand into a fist, she threw a punch at his chest. He easily caught it in his hand and held it hostage.

"Say it," Seungri demanded, tightening his grip on her wrist, "or else."

"I ain't losing to someone like you!"

He sighed. "Your call."

He pretended that her scream didn't make his heart skip a beat when he snapped her wrist in half.

Now that she was gone, he had to remember that there was no need for him to get the upper hand anymore. He had won. Not only did he have the upper hand, but he buried her ten feet under – four feet deeper than conventions had asked for. He had completely annihilated her in their last fight. Seungri could still see her narrowing her eyes and baring her teeth at him like a pissed off . Sometimes, he imagined that sparks would fly from her eyes and burn him if he looked close enough.

This is stupid, he thought, half-angry and half-tired. You know you get pissed off when you think about her. He violently skewered the fish in his hands and set it down over the fire before he reached for another fish.

"The is dead. End of story," he said out loud. "Quit dwelling on it like a chump." He hissed when he nicked himself with the knife. Squinting at the cut, he watched the blood well out and spill over in fat drops.

"Come here," Chaerin commanded with the first aid kit in her hand. "We have to treat all those marks you got or else they could get infected."

Seungri snorted but shifted to face her. He watched her soak a cotton swab in rubbing alcohol and pressed it to his cuts. He flinched at the stinging sensation, making her roll her eyes.

"Man up, you baby." She pressed harder on a particularly deep cut.

"You trying to kill me or something here?" Seungri hollered. He evaded the cotton swab in her hand.

"Forgive me if I'm looking out for you," she said sarcastically. "Hold still! Geez."

After a few moments of silence, he noticed the slight tremors running through her body. Sparing her a glance, Seungri noticed she was trying to hold in her laughter. When she saw his put-out expression, she burst out laughing.

"It's nothing, really," she said, waving off his glare. "It's just that, well. You look like you got into a fight with a cat with all those scratch marks."

"Shut up," he grumbled.

Her laughter tapered off into snickers, but he noticed that she eased up the pressure she put on used on his cuts.

Once he deemed that the bandage were secure, Seungri picked the knife back up to resume the cleaning, mindful of where his fingers were. Once that was done, he stuck the rest on the fire and rotated them so that they'd cook evenly. He took the first two and blew on them. Taking a bite out of one, he absentmindedly held out the other to the side and said, "Careful, it's hot."

When no one took it from him, Seungri looked over, only to see the trees crowding around the campsite in the dark. Angry with himself for thinking that someone was with him, he tossed the fish into the fire and watched it char. "What'd ya expect?" he sneered at himself. "Think she'd still be here with you? She's dead."

He fell quiet for a moment. "You made sure of it."

She was a bloodied mess at his feet, shaking and in pain. Seungri wondered if he accidentally broke a few of her ribs with his kick back there. Judging from her breathing pattern, he didn't rule it out. Chaerin tried to pick herself up but cried out when she placed pressure on her broken wrist.

"If you say 'Mercy' I can probably work something out for you," he offered. "If you swear your loyalty to my people, I can spare your life."

She lifted her head up to glare at him. "You can take your offer and shove it," she growled. "I’m no traitor." She trailed off into a coughing fit, hacking up blood on the ground.

"Too bad," he said, holding out a needle for her to see. "Guess I got the antidote all ready for nothing."

He could see the wheels in her head turning, generating a conclusion that was growing clearer and clearer each second.

"You poisoned me," she whispered to herself in disbelief. "You poisoned me."

"That seems to be the case, yeah," he confirmed nonchalantly. "All that running you did just made that stuff in your blood work faster. Won't be long now before it paralyzes your lungs."

Chaerin felt her heart speed up. A cold sweat broke out on her forehead. "Y-you coward. You goddamn coward! You took the easy way out and made it so that I couldn't fight back!" She gripped his ankle with her good hand and squeezed as hard as she could, willing the bones beneath her fingers to shift and crack. "What, you're too ing scared to face me like a man and go at me in a fair fight? Is that it?"

"Hey now, what's all this fairness talk about?" he asked, grabbing her by the shoulder and slamming her up against the tree. "I'm the bad guy, remember? I don't do all this fair and equal bull. I'll use whatever means necessary to get the job done and to always come out on top."

She lashed out a foot to try and kick him where it hurt, but he evaded it and clamped her legs down between his knees. Seungri held up the needle and squirted some of the clear liquid out in front of her.

"This is your cure," he explained. "All you gotta do is to change sides and you get to live."

She stared at the needle and, for one heart pounding moment, he was sure she'd do it.

Chaerin her cracked lips before speaking. "Would you ever betray your brothers?" He moved his head back, frowning. Her eyes dared him to say yes. She pressed on before he could answer, chuckling. "So why do ya look like you expect me to betray my sisters? I don't care if I die. I'm gonna die on the side I was born on, and so are you."

Snorting in disgust, Seungri growled out, "That your final answer?"

"Stop asking dumb questions," she snapped, conscious of the fact that her body tremors were becoming more noticeable and violent. "I’m not taking back my words."

The last thing she saw was the needle soaring across the air and smashing against the trees, the liquid soaking into the bark.

If she had just ing said it. If she hadn't been so stubborn (and stupid and y and everything he had come to depend on). If she hadn't been so goddamn smug and so goddamn sure he wasn't going to rip her a new one. If she hadn't looked so surprised (he told her not to be surprised) to see him watch her die. If she'd had just left her goddamn morals behind and had taken him up on his offer, Seungri wouldn't have had to slit her neck (her slender, womanly neck that he thought about more than he wanted to admit). He wouldn't have had to watch her watch him watch her bleed out.

"Stop thinking about her, you wuss!" he shouted at himself, squeezing his eyes shut.

Man up, you baby.

Seungri snapped his eyes open and looked around wildly, half-expecting to see Chaerin grinning at him.

She was there, but only in his imagination.

"This is lame," he muttered to himself. He kicked dirt over the fire to snuff it out and fell on his back, staring up at the night sky. "She was just a girl."

But she had been something more than that. When she told him that he would die being on his side (the wrong side, the bad guy side, the selfish side, the coward side), there was something inside him, something that wanted him to change her mind and prove that he could've been different. He could've been some hotshot hero that the papers glorified. He could've been someone who fought beside her instead of against her.

Seungri could almost hear her say, "You could've been a lot of things if you keep thinking like that."

It didn't matter. What's done was done. And after all, she was just a little girl who was on the wrong side (because he concluded that the wrong side was the side he wasn't on). She was just Chaerin (who so much more than what he could admit or handle). Whatever she was to him, he compressed it into a tiny jar marked "Memory" and placed in all the way in the back next to Happiness, where it would gather dust along with all the other things he would eventually get around to using (or so he told himself).

He spent the rest of his night waiting for the sky to lighten with the rising sun.

Rain fell when morning came.