“Hello?”

“Hey... It’s me”

His girlfriend voice wakes him up. He sits up on his bed and looks at the clock. It’s already 9 am?

“Hey baby... Sorry, I just woke up” he says.

She laughs, “I can see that. Hear that actually”

“So what’s up?”

“Just wondering, can we get lunch today? It seems like it has been forever since we eat together... And... I miss you Kris”

She walks out of the class and there he is. Standing tall leaning on the wall waiting for her. She smiles brightly at him. Oh how much she misses him. But he doesnt smile back.

“We need to talk”

Chills run down her spine. His piercing gaze, his quiet voice, and the way he just turns his back at her and walk—he usually holds her hand and keeps her close to him. She has no choice so  she quietly follows him.

He keeps walking until they reach the empty field at the back of their campus. Warm sun shines above them and the wind slowly blows her hair. The weather is nice and it’s a shame to ignore it.

He stops, turning around to face her. She is honestly scared. Scared of what he would say to her because it doesnt seem like a good thing. He stares at her for a really long time, looking at her with somewhat pleading eyes. He clears his throat before speaking.

“I think we should break up”

Her mind goes blank for a moment.

“I ummmm I... I like you a lot. Would you go out with me?”

“Will you be my girlfriend?”

“I think I’m in love with you. I waited until I’m sure to tell you, though”

“Stay with me”

She laughs, “Kris, it’s not funny”

“I’m serious”

“But why? Why do you want to break up with me? Did I say something wrong? Did I do something wrong? Is there anything you want me to do? What did I do wrong?”

“You did nothing wrong, ___. It’s just that... We both have been busy with college. Don’t deny that”

She keeps silent, battling with her thoughts inside mostly because she is panicked but at the same time she knows what he said is true. She can’t deny that their 2 years relationship is dying too. No time to meet each other; the regular phone calls keeps decreasing  and she does not even remember when is the last time they kiss.

“Keeping up going on dates, phone calls at night. I honestly cant do that. Some days i am just too tired because of all the studies and homework i have to do. Us being together, it will be too distracting. We cannot finish our studies if we keep being together. Dont tell me this thought havent crossed your mind”

“Kris.. It actually has. But i never brought it up because i thought we can do it. I thought i can trust you. I thought if i can manage the time between my studies and you then you would do the same too. I thought we can work this out”

He keep silent. He’s not looking at her face anymore, instead he looks at the top of her head. He wills himself and bit his lips. Mustering up his courage. He got to do this. If he doesn’t end this, it would only hurt them both.

He holds right hand in his, “I honestly can’t do this. My priority right now is my studies and I dont want to dissapoint my parents. I am sorry”

“Kris... I’m sorry too...”

“So... we’re breaking up?”

“I guess we are...”

Silence once again envelop them. Her heart breaks, the feeling of his warm hand on her, usually feels so familiar and comforting. There’s nothing she could do now. He’s right. But at the same time, she loves him so much. But what about the responsibilities they have? What about their shared feelings, the memories? But if this is for the best, then...

Finally she speaks up, “Kris... I just want to say thank you for the last 2 years... for everything you have done for me. Thank you”

“___... Thank you for loving me” he whispers.

For the last time.

For the last time he leans in and presses his lips on hers. She feels so soft and warm and moist and just perfect. Her breath hit his face and her scent fills him, her small hand the back of his neck like she always does. He put his hands on her waist and pulls her smaller body closer to him.

Let me feel your warmth for the last time.

Something wet drips down his face. She’s crying and guilt consumes him quickly. He doesnt want to see her cry so he deepen the kiss and just continue to feel her but eventually he has to let go, let go of her lips, her hands, her body away from him. She stares at him, lips red and slightly swollen. He almost lean in and kiss her again. Almost. Tears still drop down her cheeks slowly.

“Kris... Bye” she says, barely a whisper.

He nods, “Bye”

She turns around and walks away. He wills himself and it takes all his self control to make his feet stay in place because honestly it’s really hard to watch her walk away from him like that. Her figures slowly fading, and every step she makes breaks her heart knowing he does not stop her.

`````````````

She steps out of the elevator and then, she sees him running down the stairs. It’s him.

“Oh... Hi?” he says awkwardly. It’s been about 6 months since their break up. They both did concentrate to their studies while secretly missing each others’ arms and laughs and lips and just everything.

“Hi... Kris. How are you?” His name feels strange on her lips. She’s not used to say that name while not in tears.

“I’m fine... You?”

“I’m okay, I guess” she answers. If Kris is just a little less oblivious, he would see the double meaning in that.

They walk side by side and a longing feeling bothers her. She can’t deny that she misses him maybe a little bit too much and she just wants to wrap her arms around him and hug him and she wants to feel safe again.

She’s too busy day dreaming about the man beside her that she doesn’t see the little bump on the street. She trips; she would fall face first if it’s not for his hand holding her arm.  

“Be careful”

Something stirs really deep inside her heart, feeling the warmth of his fingers. And a part of her died when he let go.

The rest of the walk is silent. The atmosphere becomes awkward. Maybe she’s not the only one who got affected by that touch.

“My car is here. Bye” she says

“Bye”

````````

We walk side by side and somehow it feels somewhat awkward not holding her hand in mine. Our shoulders bumped and her scent fills me. Still smells so good. I inhale deeply, trying make that scent to be permanent inside my nostrils. I was about to ask how her day was but then, she trips and almost fall. My hand goes automatically hold her arm to prevent that to happen. A nostalgic feeling warms my heart and I unconsciously smile... Still clumsy as ever. Her skin feels so soft and warm and it’s a shame that i cannot touch her like i used to; but we broke up and it would be weird if i keep my hand there. I let go and i immidiately regret it. I clear my throat and we continue to walk in silence.

“My car is here. Bye” she says.

I nod, “Bye”

And then, just for a milisecond, I see her smile at me.

Still so beautiful.

--------

a/n hope i didn't dissapoint anyone :)