There was trouble on the grounds again. Strong winds last night had shaken the Big Top and almost uprooted it completely – something that should not have happened if the nails had been properly driven into the ground. Jinki and the rest of the boys were facing the repercussions now.

“Yah, get in line! He’s gonna catch you!”

“Yeah well, I’m gonna get in line when I want to-“

“He’s gonna whoop your and you’re gonna come crying-“

“Like you that time you broke a fingernail? Crying for your mama?”

“Kimsoo, Jinhee! Here, now!” Master Jongdae, the man that was in charge of the ‘low-level management employees ‘called out. The two boys in question instantly stopped fooling around and approached the man with heads bowed. The others automatically got in line as well, remembering that this man’s wrath had brought them horrible nights of sleeping on their fronts before, thanks to the open wounds on their backs.

“Do I look like I’m making a joke up here?! Have you boys forgotten the taste of the whip, just because I’ve been very sparing with it?!”

Jinki kept his eyes down, shaking his head obediently. Jonghyun reached out and touched his arm. It was a fleeting contact, but it was reassuring nonetheless. Jinki could get so scared sometimes, it was maddening even to him.

“Two lashes each for the both of you! The rest, no food and no sleep till the Big Top has been secured once again!”

Jinki watched as the two boys were dragged away by the two butch men that Master Jongdae always had following him, approved by the ring master to help keep the slaves in check. The playful mood from before was obliterated completely as they all shuffled towards their workplace. Valencia, the magician, was waiting on site, smoking her cigarette.

“In trouble again, boys?” she greeted them as they came. Jonghyun was the only one ever who had the guts to talk back to her. Mostly because she never got him in trouble for it and partly because she liked the challenge, apparently. Jinki also had the theory that she had this odd little… thing for Jonghyun, which disgusted Jinki to no end.

“You know us very well, ahjumma!”

Sarcasm flowed like blood in Jonghyun’s veins.

“It’s not ahjumma, Jonghyun! Valencia! Va-len-shia!” she pronounced for him, laughing out loud afterwards after taking a puff, as if that was some joke.

“Alright, ahjumma! I’ll remember that!” Jonghyun called back to the woman as they passed her.

“You take me for granted Jonghyun. One day, I might prove to be your most precious friend. It’s just a matter of time before the little fishy boy’s act is stripped from the circus and you boys come to work for me instead…” she said, laughing malevolently.

Jinki glanced over his shoulder, sending the woman a glare as they walked away. The woman did not even bat an eyelash, which annoyed Jinki even more.

“Let it go, Jinki. She’s not even worth it. Look at her trying to brag with a strange foreign name instead of her awful real one. Pathetic…” Jonghyun said, pretending to throw up.

“Taemin’s not going anywhere…” Jinki murmured.

“ Well, we don’t know that. The doctor’s been pretty persistent-“

“Even if he leaves-“ Jinki said coldly, stopping Jonghyun mid-sentence, “-he would come back for me!”

Jonghyun stopped in his tracks, slightly taken aback by Jinki’s harsh tone. Slowly though, he came out of his surprise, laughing awkwardly as if to appease Jinki.

“Alright, Jinki… If that’s what you say…”Jonghyun seemed quizzical about Jinki’s odd behavior, but if he had a problem with it, he sure did not say it out loud. Jonghyun didn’t really know what Jinki was going through.

Late that evening, when Jinki went to pick up Taemin, he was once again met by the ring master and the doctor as they were leaving. It was way too late and it was surprising that the ring master still had guests around. Jinki was careful to avoid their eyes, but he could not help sending the evil eye after them.

Jinki went straight to the aquarium, climbing up to find Taemin sitting on the edge of the pool, staring into blank space. He was breathing hard. He noticed Jinki only when he began stepping on the overflowing water to get to the other.

 “Something happen?” Jinki asked, worried. Taemin shook his head, pushing himself off the edge and diving in. Jinki watched him perform some somersaults and flips underwater for a bit, getting comfortable on the ledge while waiting for him to come up for air.

Taemin came up after almost one minute, barely breathing hard now despite having been down there for quite a bit. His stamina was incredible, Jinki admired it. Taemin slowly swam back to him, eyes zoning in on the thing Jinki was holding now. Another treat he earned with his puppy eyes – this time leftover tarts.

“I stole it for us to-“

Jinki didn’t even have to finish. Taemin was already pushing himself up with hands on Jinki’s thighs, just high enough to reach the unwrapped snack and take a big bite. Then, he sank back lower, floating between Jinki’s legs as he chewed. Jinki simply shook his head in faux disapproval – where were Taemin’s manners?

“What happened? Why are they going back so late?” Jinki asked, taking a bite as well. Taemin looked away for a bit. Still not meeting his eyes, Taemin shrugged.

“Don’t understand…”

“You don’t understand? What did you not understand?” Jinki asked around a full mouth. Taemin stared at his mouth for a long time. Jinki grew conscious about it, thinking that he must have something on it. So he moved to wipe it off.

Taemin took the chance to come in for another bite. Then, he pulled himself up to sit beside Jinki.

“Nothing…” Taemin said, making Jinki wonder again. But he didn’t have the chance to linger over the thought. He noticed just how pruned up Taemin’s fingers were and remembered that he needed to get chores of his own done. So he decided to leave it be for now.

“Let’s go Taeminnie…”

“Don’t want. Not yet…” Taemin protested. Jinki sighed heavily.

“Don’t do this Taemin, I’ve got no more energy to play with you…”

“Then go!” Taemin said, going under water again.

“You know, you being so stubborn is gonna get me in trouble someday…” Jinki mused out loud.

“Don’t care. I like water…” Taemin lifted his nose high in the air, acting smug now that he was out of Jinki’s reach.

“Of course you don’t…” Jinki said, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly. Taemin smiled, swimming towards Jinki slowly. When he was close enough, he rose above the water, leaning on one arm on the edge and reaching for the tarts with the other, struggling to get a good grip before taking one. Seeing Taemin’s webbed fingers brought Jinki down a whole series of connected memories that ended in the most recent one, causing another one of those nauseating bouts of confusion in JInki. Should he be happy for the boy or feel sad for himself, knowing that Taemin actually had a chance of leaving this place?

“They might be sending you away soon, did you know that?” Jinki kept his eyes on his own lap as he spoke, trying to coax out Taemin's two cents on the matter..

“They could help you become normal. You could walk like me. You could talk like me. You can leave this place…”

Taemin stopped moving and remained eerily still. Jinki did not dare look up into his face, in case he forgot that he was supposed to be the stronger one here.

“I know I should be happy. You won’t have to suffer this way anymore. That’s good right?” Jinki laughed, the sound of it painful to hear for how fake it was.

Taemin’s cold hand lifted Jinki’s face.

“I don't go…”

“You don’t want to leave me, but you’ll have to. And if it came down to it, I’d make you go. It’s a chance you’ll be stupid to give up…” Jinki said, feeling at least a little bit of joy that Taemin did not want to leave him as well.

“They cannot help. I stay with you…” Taemin said stubbornly.

“Taemin, don’t be an idiot. Of course they can help you. They’ve learned so much and have done so many unthinkable things. I'd think the least they could do would be to save you from this place…”

“I won’t go away…”                           

“Taemin- Uggghh… It’s no point talking to you. Just… Just leave me alone!“ Jinki burst out, throwing one of his rare tantrums by lying down on the ledge, back turned to Taemin. He could hear Taemin whining behind him, grasping gingerly onto his shirt to shake him. When Jinki did not budge, Taemin pulled with all his force, an action Jinki knew must have caused him a lot of pain because of the way Taemin’s fingers were not as flexible as others’ were.

So Jinki gave a little, lying on his back to stare straight up at the tent above, its colours fading due to exposure to the sun for far too long. Taemin did not give up trying to please Jinki. He nosed Jinki’s arm and the side of his face, whining low in his throat like a little cat wanting attention.

“You pissed me off, Taemin! I’m not talking to you…”

Taemin’s hands left him for a bit. Just moments later, Taemin was squirting water out his mouth from inside the water. Jinki sent Taemin a deadly glare before returning to his original indifferent pose. That was when Taemin decided to finally slither his way up onto the ledge so that half his body was out of the water. He propped himself up on his elbows to enter Jinki’s sight, giving him an incomprehensible look. Jinki’s attention was caught by it. He wondered what the boy was thinking.

“What Taemin?”

Taemin did not answer. Instead he bowed his head a little, bringing his face closer to Jinki’s. Before Jinki knew what was happening, Taemin was placing his lips on Jinki’s tenderly. Like he was scared.  Frozen in a state of confusion, Jinki could do nothing more than just lay there, amazed by the wet feeling of Taemin’s lips pressing against his.

He had forgotten to breathe. So when Jinki finally remembered to inhale, he accidentally jostled Taemin above, causing his lips to slide further and Taemin’s fangs to scrape lightly against Jinki’s lips. He pulled away like he had been shot by electricity, diving under water. Jinki finally woke up from his reverie, up the blood along with the taste of Taemin as he sat up.

“Taemin… Come here… Taemin!” Jinki called, kneeling on the edge of the aquarium. Taemin’s head popped up on the far edge of the aquarium, looking at him with sorry eyes.

“Why did you do that? Taemin, come back here…” Jinki tried to keep the urgency out of his voice. But he couldn’t help it. 

Jinki sat at the edge, staring at the dark, still water, his mind racing. He waited for a minute. Two. By the third minute, Jinki’s mind began racing for a whole new reason.

“Yah! Come out! I’m not mad at you!” Jinki called out loudly. When there were still no signs of Taemin, Jinki really began to panic. He leaned over the edge, trying to look all the way down to the bottom. It was far too dark to see, though.

“Taemin, please come out here! Don’t scare-“

Jinki never got around to finishing that sentence. Taemin came springing out the water at that moment, grabbing hold of Jinki’s head with both his hands before he tugged him down into the water. The cold water rushed all over Jinki’s body, soaking through his clothes. Some rushed down his open mouth, but not enough to flood his lungs and leave him struggling for a breath. His lips were once again sealed by Taemin’s and his lungs were replenished with fresh oxygen, like he never stopped respiring air.

When the panic of drowning died away, Jinki finally began to see things for what they were. He was in Taemin’s aquarium, fully submerged and breathing easy, two things that did not go together. Taemin was showing him that he was capable of doing this. It’s exciting and mind-boggling, all at the same time. How the hell was Taemin keeping him breathing?

Taemin detached himself from Jinki for a bit, leaving Jinki to float on his own. He stared at Taemin, completely confused. Taemin still had it in him to laugh at Jinki, a sight Jinki could not wrap his mind around. Jinki looked around himself. The aquarium as Taemin saw it was eerily beautiful, especially in the darkness like this. He could not see the bottom of it, but he could see the warped images of the surroundings and the shimmering of the light as they were refracted in the water.

It was so strange.

Taemin was quick to realize when Jinki beginning to have a hard time breathing again and joined their lips again, forcing air into his lungs. He doesn’t know why he does it, but Jinki brought up his hands to cup Taemin’s throat, pulling him closer – because besides the life-sustaining air exchanging process, there was something simply so… magnetic about the younger boy. Taemin would have none of it though, pulling away and gesturing to Jinki to look at his throat.

The lines on Taemin’s throat, well, they were moving. They were parting and closing periodically to allow water in and out, just like a fish.

Like a real mermaid.

Much later that night, when Jinki’s muscles were fatigued by over-exertion and Taemin was beginning to grow sleepy, they finally got out of the water. Jinki was simply dumbfounded by everything to say anything while Taemin seemed to not be able to wipe this stupid grin off of his face.

“Not normal. I won’t go…”

And Jinki could find no way to dispute that.

“That’s what you get for swimming in the middle of the night, Jinki!” Jonghyun mumbled as he replaced the wet towel on Jinki’s forehead. He has had a fever for two days in a row now and Master Jongdae was getting real tired of Jinki excusing himself off of duty so often. But he wasn’t getting any better either. So what could Jinki really do?

The cold towel felt like a blessing from heaven because the heat wave was already beginning to kill Jinki’s brain cells little by little. The weather was crazy these days. It was scorching hot in the afternoon and poured like a thunderstorm at night.

“It’s really so weird that you two would fall sick together. It’s like you’re twins or something…” Jonghyun kept mumbling, taking his frustration out on Jinki for being so stupid and falling sick like this.

“Wait, Taemin’s sick?” Jinki asked, Jonghyun’s words only then registering in his mind. Jonghyun sighed dramatically, dropping the other towel in his hands and plopping back onto Jinki’s stomach, rubbing his temples.

“I’ve been talking for about ten minutes now about everything between the sky and the ground and the only thing you heard is Taemin…”

“Well, is he alright then?”

“I dunno! The upper-class said it seemed like an asthma attack or allergy or something like that. Taemin’s hasn’t swum since that night you came back soaking wet…”

The wheels were turning so fast in Jinki’s head suddenly.

“Did anyone take him to the aquarium that morning?” Jinki asked. Jonghyun didn’t seem to hear him. He simply made himself comfortable on Jinki’s stomach, trying to get some shut-eye.

“Yah! Answer me!” Jinki demanded, shaking Jonghyun by his shoulders.

“No, Jinki. No one took him ‘cause it’s your job and you didn’t tell anyone to take him in your place. Jung-shii found him breathing hard and immediately called for the ring master. You know, your obsession for this-“

“Take him to the aquarium,” Jinki said. Jonghyun turned to him, one eyebrow raised.

“He’s under that doctor’s supervision-“

“Do it. For me, please. Don’t ask why…”

Jonghyun wasn’t convinced.

“The boy’s sick and you want me to throw him in cold water like that? I wouldn’t do that-“

“Fine, I’ll do it myself!” Jinki said, beginning to sit up when Jonghyun sprang up onto his feet, hands messing up his own dark hair in frustration.

“You’re impossible, I hope you know that Jinki…” Jonghyun mumbled, walking off. That was a relief. Jinki simply did not have the energy to do heavy-lifting and Taemin seemed like he needed the water to breath now. Perhaps his lungs were failing him. He used to be able to breathe fine out of water so he must have used lungs like everybody else right. Did that mean that Taemin was changing in some ways? Evolving?

Jinki knew that the lady from that fishing equipment store wasn’t that far off from the truth with her assumptions. But the question really was how close to the truth she was.