I stood in the middle of the road, looking at the entrance of Yifan’s hangout. My breathing was slightly laboured, my palms sweating as my brain started to swim. I didn’t know whether this was the best thing to do. I couldn’t make up my mind. I didn’t know what I wanted at all. What would happen if I turned down Hongbin? What would happen if I turned down Yifan? How would the two leaders react? I had to make a decision and soon my mind was set on one person and one person alone.

Taking one more deep breath, I wiped my hands on my trousers before walking into the hangout. The members all looked at me, hope in their eyes as I wiggled on the spot. I could barely hear what they were saying as the blood rushed to my ears turning them red.  

                “So …” Yifan trailed off, waiting for my answer.

                “Uh … I’m sorry but I can’t,” I apologised, looking at the floor and not wanting to face the others. A silence fell over the group and it was awkward. I felt bad, as though I’d cussed them out rather than declined the opportunity to stay with their gang.

                “Why?” Yifan asked after a long breath.

                “I’m sorry. It’s just Hongbin is my best-friend and …” I trailed off only to see Yifan surprisingly nodding as though he knew how I felt.

                “It’s ok – just remember there’s a place for you if you want it.” I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded, smiling pathetically before scurrying out of the hideout. I could hear someone scolding Yifan, most likely Jongin who had hate for anyone in Hongbin’s gang rooted in his veins.

I couldn’t believe how well the meeting with them had actually gone and I couldn’t wait to tell Hongbin that I’d be back. I knew it wouldn’t be the same if I was accepted by them … if I was accepted at all. What if he suddenly didn’t want me back? I would be without anyone. I mean I could go back to Kris but like the leader had said, it would be betraying him and that would just end up with more trouble on my plate.

I found myself outside a small café, the wind slightly nipping at my cheeks as I stood on spot and looked at the menu. I stuffed my hands into my pockets, hoping I had some change and nearly jumped when my hand wrapped round a note of some sort. Slipping through the door and into the warmth, I looked around and breathed in deeply to relish in the scent of coffee.

It was quite inside, not many people sitting in the many different chairs. Nothing seemed to match, everything unique giving the place a homely feel. Taking another deep breath, I walked to the barista, a young foreigner with tattoos all over her arms. She had a pretty smile, one that made you feel welcome and like a valued customer. I ordered a hot chocolate with a cheeky smile and paid her before finding a leather couch in the furthest corner of the café and sinking into the seat. I wanted to forget about the gang problem for a moment and enjoy my drink in a tranquil peace I rarely got to feel.

Why are you only like this to me?

Why am I like this to you?

The end of your words are vague and my tears fall.

I’m on my knees and I’m ready to get hurt.

I smiled at the paper; pleased with the small amount of work I managed to get done in the short space of time it took for me to gulp down the delicious hot chocolate in my cup. I was so focused on my page though that I didn’t register someone slipping into the seat opposite me until a throat was cleared.

                “Oh … hi,” I stuttered, a blush immediately rising to my cheeks when I realised it was Jaehwan sitting opposite me.

                “Hey, I never see you here,” the blonde pondered on the thought, his finger coming up to scratch the back of his head cutely.

                “No, I found this place by chance,” I laughed awkwardly whilst closing my notebook and putting it away slowly.

                “Oh? You should pop by more.”

                “Yeah it’s nice here,” I swallowed and chuckled slightly. It was awkward, there was no lying about that but somewhat nice and calming as I toyed with my pen and Jaewhan sipped on his own drink. “Uh … I’m sorry about the other day.”

                “It’s ok. I enjoyed it really,” I noticed the way Jaewhan bit his lips, his tongue darting out to the droplets of liquid off the side of his mouth before he spoke.

                “Really?” I asked with disbelief clear in my voice. “It was pretty .” Jaewhan looked at me strangely for a moment, as though he was checking I said what I did before he burst into chime-like peals of laughter. I chuckled too, watching amazed as he tried not to cough and splutter like a broken record.

                “Maybe next time will be better?” He giggled.

                “Next time?” My brain panicked. There would be a next time. I’d be able to start again and hopefully not make the date a disaster. Jaewhan just nodded, a blush spread across his cheeks as his hand came up and covered his mouth cutely.

                “Sure,” he said before looking at his phone and checking the time. “I better get going but I’ll see you around.” My eyes went wide when the blonde jumped from his seat, latte in hand and pecked my cheek. I was left sitting there looking like a goldfish as Jaewhan disappeared around the corner, my mind whizzing around my skull at top speeds whilst I tried to figure out if what had just happened, did happen.

A few moments later, I snapped from my revere and raised my hand to my burning cheeks. I noticed the barista was looking at me strangely so I quickly jumped from my seat and fled out the room, hurrying towards my area of town and trying to get the blush off my cheeks.

(^_^)

                “Hongbin?” I asked as I walked quickly into the hideout. I’d hoped there wouldn’t be too many people there and luckily there weren’t as I scoured the room for the leader. He was in his usual place with the usual cigarette hanging from his mouth. His eyes immediately latched onto me, scanning my face before beckoning me forward so I was standing in front of him. I noticed how everyone else seemed to scamper away and it made me nervous: my hands sweating and a lump forming in my throat.

                “What do you want?” His voice was hoarse, as though he’d been shouting.

                “Uh … I declined,” I murmured, not wanting to anger the man in front of me. He just stared at me, judging and thinking, rolling the in between his fingers.

                “You what?”

                “I said no to Yifan,” I flinched before releasing a breath I didn’t know I was holding when my best friend leapt from his throne and launched himself at me.

                “Welcome back Ravi-ah!

(*_*)

Hello lovelies,

I'm sorry, I didn't realise how long it'd been and I would have updated before I went away on holiday if I'd known. Please forgive me!

Comment/Subscribe/Upvote like always :)

Sophie x

P.S I've got another vixx fic up at the moment ... it's them as babies!

Fine it -------> HERE

#-qgdxo - how the tables have turned! Thank you for commenting :)

#andrea2313 - you're welcome - I hope you liked it

#rumourhasit12 - don't feel too bad! Thank you for commenting

#imperfect_narcissist - haha I'm glad you enjoyed Ravi's little speech - I hope you liked this chapter :)