Spring Year 2020, A Coffee Shop in Seoul, Korea

“Make decisions with precaution.” My mother use to tell me.

Twenty six years down the road here I am finally living it. I was in an intersection but now I made a decision that will change my life entirely.

Fiddling on the ring that adorned my left ring finger. I giggled like a teenager looking at the single pink diamond that sparkled due to the rays of sunlight coming from the tall glass windows of the rustic coffee shop in the busy streets of Seoul. Through that window I could see the sidewalks were crowded with people as they scuffled hurriedly to their destination as I sat still waiting for the arrival of my two best gal pals to share the exciting news of my engagement.

“Yes.” I sighed in relief to myself. “I am finally going to marry the right man for me. A man that chose me and who I chose carefully for myself. This time it was not because of a meddling sister or a bond between mothers that wanted to become an official family through their offspring’s. Unlike my first engagement that happened without my consent nor my knowledge when I was merely 2 years of age.”

I felt uneasiness as I remembered tidbits of that memory that my mother shared with. Lifting and dropping my shoulders I muttered an exasperated cry.

“Can you believe at two years of age?!” I rolled my eyes as those thoughts run in my head.

Flashback to Autumn Year 1996, My Father’s Business partner’s home, Gwangju, Korea

Even as a toddler I strive for change and adventure all the time a trait that I probably got from my Father. Since after 36 years of living a middle class comfortable life in the mainstream city of Seoul he decided to pack up and bring all of us, my three older siblings, my mother and the both of us, to a small town of Gwangju.

For what?

A change of scenery and a new prospect for a business partner. A rich Chinese investor who owned the biggest shipping line in Gwangju his newest best friend and partner in crime. They were perfect for each other and seem to complement one another.

I watch with my big curious eyes from the floor across where they were seated as the Chinese business partner endlessly talked to my father about his big dreams and plans in life. As my father sat silently listening nodding his approval to whatever he was saying.

On my left his wife and my mother were busily ogling on a little boy in a crib as he soundly slept, the Chinese family’s new nine month old son, as they gossiped about anything under the sun. Meanwhile, my older sisters were busy playing outside with the neighbors and the Chinese family’s eldest son.

I was left to entertain myself. It was entertaining to watch the Chinese man as he spoke with exaggerated expressions and big gestures but after a while I got bored of it too. I decided to have my little adventure of my own and at that age crawling to a five meter distance is already an adventure in itself.

I crawled my way to where my mother sat talking busily to her newly acquired friend. I stopped looked at her and she did not even took notice I was there. I hurriedly went pass her and behind the crib as I poked an eye in between those wooden flat sticks framing the crib. I could not see a clear picture just a slit of an eye and chubby cheeks of a fat Chinese baby. I was bored and was overwhelmed with curiosity on why my mother took better notice of this baby more than me. I held on to one wooden frame pulled myself up and I was standing on my toes, sort of wobbling but at least standing. I was smiling to myself because of my accomplishment but then I was not tall enough to look in the crib. A wooden horizontal frame blocking my vision.

I wanted to try something else so I pulled myself up again trying to stand on the very tip of my toes.

 I did it!

 I saw a fat baby with thick hair and eyebrows. His cheeks fully flushed. I was about to agree he was indeed adorable when I fell flat on my .I cried loudly as my mom ran to me, picked me up, hugged me tight on her chest and patted my back.

“What are you doing? Awwwww…you wanted to see baby Yi fan?” Lifting me up to face her eye level my mom nuzzled my nose with hers. “You should be careful my dear. Falling for a boy almost immediately can lead you to trouble.”

The Chinese woman giggled and was visibly thrilled by that idea that is why she disagreed with my mother. “But falling for my son won’t be trouble at all. In fact why don’t we agree on getting them engaged already.” She winked at me and my mom as I looked at her without a clue not knowing that my future is being discussed.

“Wu Li Xi Ya!”My mother exclaimed. “Although I am thrilled with that idea we could not possibly decide for them. They have the right to decide for themselves on who they choose to marry.”

My mom walked away from Mrs. Wu with that decision made for me. If only then I understood what they said maybe I have thought otherwise. Since, Wu Yi Fan was the closest longest running friendship I have.  Although we seem to have a lot of clumsy instances when we are together. I should have known that in the very first place since my first glimpse of him it was already a mishap. If only there was a big “caution” sign posted on the crib then I would have not taken that step first.

Summer Year 2002, Roller Blading Rink at a Park in Incheon, Korea

I was holding on firmly at both of the hands of my best friend. As he tried to maintain his balance. I got my first ever roll