I moved on.

I guess we weren't meant to be. What went wrong? We were having such a great time, we laughed at each others jokes, we would hug even in public, we would send each other sweet messages, we would take walks around the park and we would secretly kiss.

I really didnt know. I was so confused. Everything just faded away all of a sudden.

Why didnt we try to bring it back? Why did you let go so easily? I missed you so much yet you just left.

I dont understand Chen, did you not love me anymore? I see you holding and touching the others. It really hurt...

I wanted to ask you and try to bring back things but I wondered if you would even talk to me after. I didnt want to ruin the friendship we had...so I just let it slip away. I loved you...but I had to let you go.

I found someone else, someone who I loved as much as I loved you. He was funny, sweet, caring and handsome. 

We would always hangout and have the best dates. I would always be so happy when I was with him. Many people said that we looked good together, many disagreed.

I ignored them. I didnt want it to ruin or relationship besides, we loved each other.

We were best friends, or atleast started like that before we got together. He was very special to me. 

Luhan, he could make you smile just by looking at his face. He was like an angel, no wonder everyone liked him. I felt very lucky that he chose me, very lucky. Sometimes I wonhder if he feels the same way.

It has been a while, we started to get busy with schedules but we never forgot about each other. Our bond was strong. It felt invincible. 

After a few months, the bond started to break. He would always get home with a sad look on his face and I would never know why, he would always ignore me when I ask.

Was it something I did? Did I do something wrong?

I got very worried, I didnt like that look on his face. I always tried cheering him up but he always insisted that he was fine. My heart would break everytime he would ignore my questions, frown at my jokes and let go of my hand.

I missed the old times, but what could I do. I didnt know what was on his mind, I never did.

I would ask the others but they would advise to just let him be. I couldnt just let him be like that forever.

I cried every night. I hated how things were. I hated how I couldnt show him I loved him, I hated how things got so bad, I hated how I cant make him smile anymore and I hated that we were starting to fade away.

I didnt want to get hurt again...no not again. It was too painful. I dont think I can handle another.

But I knew it was coming. 

It finally came, the day I dreaded. The day he would leave me.

It was Sehun. His ex. He still loved him

I should have known. I was so caught up in everything but why...I thought he loved me.

I didnt want him to continue on with me, he didnt care as much as he used to. I couldnt force him to stay. I couldnt do that.

I love Sehun like a brother, I have nothing against him. He's a good guy and Ii'm sure he will make Luhan happy but why...

why do I feel so horrible?

The man I loved, was in love with someone else. I couldnt help but feel worthless...

Does anybody love me? At all? Everyone I do, seems to leave me...

Should I just not love...so I wont get hurt?

But I was going to miss him. Miss our dates, our moments.

He will have them with someone else now, someone he truly loves. I hope he will be treated right...

I guess I wasnt meant to be with anyone, it would always come to and end...

You will always have a choice in love. You choose who will be that special someone...but you cant make them choose who they'll love. Its all up to them...whether you make it happen or let it go, its all up to you.

I chose to let them all go. It was the right choice for me and for them.

Maybe I wasnt meant to love but hopefully,

someone will love me...